by Mallory Funk
Camilla and I are done eating before everyone else, but she ends up ordering a cheesecake while we talk with my brothers.
She’s fitting in nicely with my club and I am oddly pleased by that fact.
Camilla
The last four weeks have been great other than the fact that I have been pretty much held up in the club. I still have to go out with my brother when I needed something because they aren’t going to chance that I get left unprotected.
I completely get that. The thought of Reaper still out there sends chills down my spine. I have to know how he got away though. I have no doubt that he did it when we helped Katy escape. I just hope that he’s caught soon.
I’ve gotten close to the brothers and the Old Ladies in the club.
Crash has spent almost every day at my side. I can’t say that I hate his company, but it can get a little overwhelming at times.
Mostly the reason is because I think he likes me in a way that I’m not ready for. The only person who has made me think of having more is Tyson, but I’m not sure that he would ever be ready or feel the same way.
Sure, he is moving on and not in such a dark place since he got back, but it will still take him awhile to recover from his broken heart.
So far, the only person who has caught me checking Tyson out is Krista, but she just smirks at me and doesn’t bother saying anything.
Is it wrong to want a guy who is obviously unavailable? Because if I ever got to be with him, it wouldn’t be something casual. The way he makes me feel just by being around him lets me know that I could never be causal with him.
Yesterday when we had supper, I enjoyed every moment of it. I wanted to find a way to make him laugh and I’m glad I did; even if his brothers pretty much crashed our meal.
Today, I am sitting out back enjoying the sun as a few brothers are scattered around talking. The weather is too nice today to be spending it inside. At least that’s my reasoning for being outside. I have no doubt that at least one of them is outside because I am. They wouldn’t possibly let me be out here on my own.
“Well what’s on the agenda today, Cami?” my brother asks as he comes outside with a coffee.
It has been good to see my family adjusting to being here. I like that my family fits in with this club. They have become important to me.
I shake my head. “Oh the same thing I do every day,” I tell him dryly.
My life has become repetitive, but I can’t complain since we are here for a reason.
My brother lets out a sigh like he wants to talk to me about something but is not sure how to start it.
I knock my shoulder with his. “Well, you can tell me what it is,” I say.
“Fuck, you know me so well,” he grunts out.
I let out a laugh. “Of course I do. You are my brother. That sigh tells me that something is on your mind and you want my opinion.”
He lets out a chuckle. “Yeah, that’s about right.”
My brother sits silently for a few minutes before he talks.
“I’m thinking about prospecting for the club,” he blurts out.
“This club?” I ask in shock.
He lets out a chuckle. “Of course this club.”
“What makes you want to do that?” I ask.
He shrugs his shoulders, but I can tell he’s working out what he wants to say.
“I don’t need more of a reason than that they saved my sister. You know I could never fit in anywhere because I was always ‘rough’ around the edges. They are loyal to each other and the club. Family and brotherhood comes first and I respect that. Plus, I will still get to be closer to you,” he says.
I was following along until he said the last part.
“What do you mean closer to me? Once Reaper is caught, I’m free to go back home,” I say.
He looks at me with a smirk on his face.
“Sometimes I forget how clueless you can be,” he says.
“What do you mean? What am I clueless about?”
“Cami! Seriously?” He looks at me in disbelief now that he can see that I am clearly confused.
“Yes seriously. I don’t see how I will be here longer than to catch Reaper,” I tell him.
He shakes his head and mumbles something quietly. I can’t hear him.
“I can’t believe that I have to clue you in. I know for a fact that there are at least five bikers here who would love nothing more than to claim you. Then there is Crash who is trying his hardest to get you to notice him, but you fucking only have eyes for Torch. He glares at any fucker who looks at you too long. I can’t believe you haven’t noticed any of this,” he says with a shake of his head.
I try to think of any other bikers who would want to claim me, but every one of them is nice to me so it’s hard to say he’s right or wrong.
“Well, Crash and I are just friends. I don’t think he likes me that way, and then Torch is just protective of me; he has been since I was in the hospital,” I tell him. He looks at me in disbelief like he can’t believe what I am really saying.
“Please tell me that you’re kidding,” he asks.
I shrug my shoulders. “Why would I be kidding? I mean Torch doesn’t like me in that way. He’s just protective. Plus, he could have any woman he wants when he’s ready. I’m sure he wouldn’t want someone like me who is broken and scarred.” I say the last part quietly.
“I have to tell you, sis that not one of these brothers care that you are scarred. Any one of them would be lucky to have you,” he says and, before I can respond, the door opens and Crash comes walking outside. When he spots us, he smiles and sits beside me with two coffees in his hand. He hands me one.
“Not sure if you had coffee yet or not, but I took a shot,” he says. I take a sip noticing that he’s made the coffee exactly how I like it.
“Thank you,” I tell him softly. I look on my other side at my brother and he’s giving me an “I told you so” look.
“Is there anything you want to do today?” Crash asks.
“Well actually Ella wanted to hang out, so she, Olivia, Sophie, Krista and I are going to hang out in the common room,” I tell him.
He nods his head. “Yeah, it’s good to spend time with your girls once in a while.”
“Uhh… yeah sure it is,” I honestly don’t know what else to say to him. I’m thinking about what my brother said now feeling that he may be right and that Crash may want me.
We spend a lot of time together, and usually he is the one to initiate everything.
I can’t remember a time that I sought him out to hang out. Am I leading him on?
Do I want Crash that way?
“I’m going to go talk to Derek,” my brother says as he gets up.
I nod my head. I don’t know how it works to prospect for someone, but I’m sure that my brother does. I fully support his decision.
“Good luck,” I say as he gets up and ruffles my hair like I’m a little kid. I try and swat his hand away but I miss and he chuckles as he closes the door.
We both are quiet as I’m trying to go over every time that Crash and I hung out together trying to see anywhere that might prove that my brother is right and that Crash wants me. I’m not sure what’s on his mind, but it’s a good twenty minutes before either of us talk.
“Listen, did you want to maybe have dinner with me sometime?” he says. He looks nervous but I can’t figure out why because we have dinner all the time together. Mostly at the club. When he sees the look of confusion on my face, he blows out a breath.
“Fuck, I mean like a date Camilla. Not as friends like we usually do. I want to take you out on a date,” he says not taking his eyes off of me.
I’m sure my eyes are as wide as saucers right now.
“Wow, this is unexpected,” I say softly.
“Is that a no?” he asks.
“No, it’s not a no,” I say. I have to wonder if this is a good idea, but Tyson hasn’t showed me any interest that way and I can’t hope that he one day wi
ll. Other than the fact that he is still healing, I know I’m ready to live. There is still one part of me that Reaper stole from me that I need to take back from him; my ability to connect with someone in an intimate way. How will I know if I can do that unless I try?
“Okay, let’s go on a date,” I say softly, and my heart beats faster at the smile that breaks across his face.
Chapter Sixteen
Camilla
It has been over a week since Crash had asked me out. I still couldn’t believe it but, so far, there was no plan in place; that was until Crash texted me a few minutes ago to say that he had made reservations for tonight.
The only person I had told was Krista. I thought for sure that word would get around the club, but it looks like she hasn’t said anything.
She didn’t seem surprised that Crash had asked me out, but she also seemed shocked that I said “yes.” I just told her that I was ready to take back a part of me that I didn’t think I would ever get back.
I didn’t think the brothers went on dates; as far as I knew, they fucked and claimed their women, but I’m sure Crash knew that if he took that approach it would freak me out, given my history.
I don’t know who will have patience to go slow with me. I think I would freak out if a man touched me intimately.
I head out of my room after reading the text and responding that I will be ready. I go in search for Krista, or someone else at least.
I see Ella in the kitchen with her man and I hesitate at the door, not sure if I want to bother what looks like a sweet moment.
But I must have stayed too long because they both turn their heads at the same time.
“Hey Camilla, how are you today?” Ella asks me. Damien just nods his head and keeps eating the mountain of food in front of him.
I walk to the coffee maker and pour myself a cup. “Nothing. I was just seeing if Krista was here this morning,” I say
“Oh they have a doctor’s appointment today for the baby, so I doubt they will be here until later in the afternoon.” Ella says.
“Oh right, I forgot about that,” I say barely making eye contact with her.
“Well, is it anything I can help you with? You know you can talk to me about anything,” she says. I look at her and take in the serious expression on her face. I can tell that she is being completely sincere.
“It was really nothing, but Crash asked me out for dinner last week, and he just texted me that he had reservations for tonight, and it has been so long that I have been on a date, not to mention with a biker that I don’t know where to start or what I should wear. That’s all,” I say in a rush, but somehow she follows along.
“Well, I can help you with that. It’s no problem. Let’s go look at your outfits right now and we will know if we need to pick up anything or borrow anything from someone else,” she says and grabs my hand. I try my hardest not to spill my coffee on the way upstairs.
I hear Damien’s chuckle all the way upstairs.
I don’t know what I had gotten myself into, but Ella looks like a woman on a mission.
Tyson “Torch”
I have felt very fucking confused ever since the supper at the diner.
There were feelings of jealousy I had when Crash would whisper in Camilla’s ear. I don’t like this feeling.
Sure, I had noticed how attractive she is, and anyone who talks to her would know how amazing she is. She would make a perfect Old Lady, but I’m not sure that I am the man to claim her.
I walk into the kitchen to see Damien sitting with his sons eating breakfast, but my sister is nowhere to be found. “Where’s Ella?” I ask as I make my way over to get a cup a coffee.
“She’s upstairs with Camilla getting her ready for her date tonight,” he says.
I stop in my tracks. I couldn’t have heard him fucking right.
I turn to see him with a smirk on his face and a knowing look in his eyes.
“What?” I ask roughly.
He nods his head. “Yeah, she’s got a date with a brother tonight, and they are upstairs deciding what she is going to wear.”
“What. The. Fuck?” I say loudly.
I take a deep breath when he doesn’t say anything. “Who the fuck is she going out with?” I ask angrily.
“Crash,” he says.
Fuck. Of course it would be him.
“What the fuck does he think he’s doing asking her out?” I practically shout out.
“That she’s a fucking amazing woman and that I would be a fool not to take my shot, brother,” Crash says. I turn around and see him staring at me angrily.
“I know she’s fucking amazing; knew that the day I first saw her,” I grit out between clenched teeth.
“She’s an unclaimed woman in our clubhouse. I’m not breaking any rules by taking a woman out for supper,” he says.
“Cancel it,” I growl out.
He shakes his head. I can see annoyance in his eyes along with amusement. I have no idea what he finds amusing right now, but he better fucking cancel this date.
“Give me one good reason why I should… brother,” he says while he challenges me with his eyes.
“Fuck.”
I know what he wants me to say.
The thing is though, I don’t know if I’m ready to lay claim to someone like that again.
“That’s what I thought. You had your chance, brother. Now I’m taking mine,” he says and then turns and leaves the clubhouse without another word.
Fuck.
I do not like this at all.
I make my way to her room and I hear my sister and her talking before I make it to the door.
“Are you sure you are ready to date?” I hear my sister say.
I hold my breath waiting for her answer.
“Well, I won’t know until I try, right? I need to get that part of me back that Reaper stole,” Camilla says.
I don’t wait another second before I open the door.
“Ella, can I talk to Camilla alone?” I ask as soon as I enter.
Ella nods without a word and walks out of the room, closing the door behind her.
“Camilla,” I say softly.
“Hey, Tyson. What’s up?” she says innocently.
“Do you like him?” I ask getting right to the point.
She shrugs her shoulders but doesn’t look at me.
“It’s a yes or no question, babe,” I say in irritation.
She looks at me straight in the eyes. “Sure, I like him. I can’t keep sitting around waiting for the one I want to look my way. I want to be happy again.”
My breath stalls at her words. “Who do you really want?”
I feel jealousy tighten over me and pain comes at the thought of her being with someone else, or of being someone else’s Old Lady.
“It doesn’t matter. My mama always said that you can’t sit around waiting for things to happen. If you want something bad enough, you have to do it yourself. Well, I want to finally be free. I want to make that happen,” she says.
“Fuck. You can’t go out with him,” I say lowly.
She tilts her head to the side. “And why not? I like him enough to give this a shot and he likes me.”
“Because I don’t like it,” I say roughly.
She lets out a humourless laugh.
“It doesn’t really matter what you like, right? We are just friends. I can’t stay single because you don’t like it.”
I scrub a hand over my face.
“You are more than that and you know it,” I say stepping closer to her, but she takes a step back.
“And how would I know that?” she says placing her hands on her hips.
“I know that I’m not the only one feeling this thing between us. I want to kill my own brother for thinking he could take what’s mine,” I growl out.
“W-what’s yours?” she says looking at me with wide eyes.
I nod my head. “Fuck, yes what’s mine. You have been mine since I first laid eyes on you. I spent months re
fusing to see it. Then when my head finally started to clear, I spent months trying to deny it. I’m not going to stand by and watch another man try to claim you when you have been mine for a long fucking time.”
“T-tyson. You have no idea what you are saying,” she says with a shake of her head. I step closer to her until I back her up against the wall.
“I know what I am fucking saying. There is no way you are going on a date, unless it is with me. If you are ready then I am ready with you. We can take this step together,” I say.
My lips are a breath away from hers and we both are breathing harder now.
“Please don’t be joking. I don’t think I could take it if you weren’t serious right now,” she says in a strained voice.
“I’ve never been more serious than I am right now, Camilla. I think you know that. We were both waiting for the other to be ready and it’s a step we take together. Not with anyone else. I can’t begin to explain my feelings, but I know that you make me feel something that I thought was long gone and wasn’t going to feel again,” I say placing a hand lightly on her cheek.
“You only want me because you are threatened by Crash asking me out.” She says the words but she looks like she doesn’t believe them herself.
I immediately shake my head. “No baby. I’m saying this because I’m tired of pretending that I’m not attracted to you. I don’t want to fight this when everything is telling me to claim you and have you by my side.”
“Okay.” She whispers the most perfect word I want to hear in this moment.
I lower my lips to hers and taste her for the first time.
Her lips feel soft and I take my time kissing her.
Her arms come up slowly around my neck as she pulls herself closer to me.
I wrap my arms around her as I slowly deepen the kiss.
The way she melts in my arms is fucking amazing.
I realize that everything has come crashing down to this moment.
This woman is mine.
Nothing is going to stop me from making her mine.
Chapter Seventeen
Camilla