“Wow. Now that you got your voice back, you’re really on fire.”
I giggled. “I am. I feel weird.” I smiled broadly.
“Oh, you’re feeling it. You’re on cloud nine. I put that smile there. Don’t you forget it.”
“What? No you didn’t. I’m smiling because I’m sitting here next to a good guy and loving every minute of it.”
“Dude. I think you just got addicted to my cock.”
I couldn’t tackle him because he was already in a reclined position and mostly under my body. I playfully punched his abs and nipped his neck near the hairline. I laughed. “I’m hungry,” I stated again. “Let’s go get something. I want to test out if I can really float on this ‘cloud nine’.”
“It’s not a literal cloud. It’s the afterglow... what you’re feeling right now. Loose as a goose.”
Mark decided we were having room service because ‘to Hell with it all’. Room service was yet another strange experience. I didn’t let Mark out of my sight—not even when he got up to answer the door. I followed him like a puppy and we ate food in the robes the hotel provided. I was in heaven...
AND SO, WHILE WE WERE only halfway done with our vacation in Milan, Book Four of this self-portrait has come to a close.
No, I was not addicted to his cock—in case some of you might be worried about that. I do want to warn you, however, that his cock and my butt do get more screen time in the next book. The orgy scene in the very next chapter of this story is but one scene featuring our naked bodies. Then there’s the part of our relationship where he lost control and fucked me almost every day for a week. Then there’s the time he straight-up stuck his tongue up my butt.
The next installment of this self-portrait has more descriptive sex, but I wouldn’t say anything gets real graphic until the very end, when I describe the first time I fucked him. (Yes, that did happen.) Book Four and Book Five are the two books with the most descriptive ‘ins and outs’ because this was the beginning of our sexual exploration (and the furthest I had gone with anyone, ever).
I trusted Mark completely. I felt comforted simply by his presence. Mark had once made the comment that I liked to be submissive and I, in turn, explained how it was just because I trusted him so much... and that it was still scary. But after the submissiveness was over, I felt so much love and respect and gratitude towards him—all in a rush. He didn’t hurt me or take advantage of me. He knew how to make me feel good. It was exhilarating to have a lover so devoted to me and who cared for me so deeply.
That’s where the rush came from that afternoon in Milan... and I suppose there might have been some post-coital glow involved as well.
And as for Bruno Mars making stupid songs... Mark put out an album of music after signing a recording contract (which I helped negotiate and which tanked his career). The album failed, in part because Mark wasn’t dedicated to the craft and was ‘just another pretty face’. Mark was from a privileged background... and the music industry is grueling. Mark said he put out the album on a lark (which is what he said to save face). If Mark ever gets too naughty with me, I can just bring up his ‘lead single’ from that album. It’s kind of like “I Gotta Feeling” from the Black Eyed Peas because it’s based on the days of the week. Oh, except it sucks and is super embarrassing and I can’t believe he thought it was a good idea to record it.
After Mark’s brief foray into music, I now have a better appreciation for Bruno Mars’ work ethic. And after a song that Mark and I wrote was picked up by a pop starlet and went in the charts... well, having our song on the charts (and sung by a stranger) was an even more unique experience. Everyone thinks that song is either about losing a loved one to cancer or about mourning a lover after a bittersweet breakup. But it’s really about my son.
I’ll plant this little seed about Alex so that you stick around until the end of this lengthy memoir to when we officially adopt Alex... Mark and I started out by fostering this kid... and he went through some real shit before we got him and therefore he had a difficult time trusting people. Getting him to stay asleep in his own bed was a struggle during that first year... so I started singing him some words before bed as I rocked him to sleep those first few weeks. God, I’m crying just thinking about it and I won’t have to edit that part of the story for another four books...
But... yeah. Mark took to singing those words, too, and it was so simple and lovely. Then, when Alex was taken from us, that song turned bittersweet and all I could do to get through my grief was write the rest of the lyrics. I had to get it out of my head, just like how I feel the compulsion to get this self-portrait out of my head. Once my thoughts are out in the open, I can let it sit, analyze my feelings and compartmentalize my grief. But if the bitterness stays in my cranium, it gets crowded up there and things get shoved around that shouldn’t get shoved... and that’s when I fall apart.
So if a story demands to be told, I get it out—the bad and the good—usually through the written word, but that one time it came out as a song.
And Mark has been there to help me through the ups and the downs of that process—forever and for always.
This concludes the fourth installment of my self-portrait, The Lover. Once again, as a warning to my asexual readers, sex is a big part of the plot of the next installment... part five of my memoir is called The Stud. So, yeah... there’s sexytime in it. So much so that in places it’s kind of like erotica. You can skip those parts in the story or you can skip to Book Six which satisfies the ‘enemies to lovers’ trope and occurs after the Big Fight that broke us up. Or you can skip to the first book with Alex in it, Book Eight: The Fiancé. I don’t have much sex in those later installments because Mark and I were fairly established lovers at that time.
Cheers,
Chris
Author's Note
Thank you for reading It's Just Us Here: The Lover.
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Thanks for reading. I hope my story brought you some joy.
The List of Amazing Patrons!
Up to seventeen! :)
In the last month Bran, Brianna, Sara Krefors, Philtatos and Nola Superba pledged. Welcome and thank you!
And here's the list of the rest of you guys:
Bran, Brianna, Sara Krefors, Philtatos, Nola Superba, Alba L May, Ann xn, Anne Lost in a Book, Annie L, annob, Barrett Parsons-Justice, Brian Bennett, Gabi, Kay Jay, Lau, tashyka jussome, and Zsanett Ujvári.
Also, an extra special shout out to these three Patrons who went above and beyond with their pledges: annob, Gabi, and tashyka jussome. :)
Author's Intense Gratitude
Thank you to the following amazing readers who helped clean up this manuscript. All existing errors are my fault. (That said, when you find typos, let me know and I'll fix it before the print editions!)
Gabi, Xia Xia Lake and Ann-C. I had a crisis of confidence between books four and five and didn't know if I would have the nerve to roll out these two books. But then I put my big boy pants on and sent them to you. Thank you for being my first line of guinea pigs and for keeping it a judgment-free zone.
Annie L. You have put so much thought and consideration into every edit. Thank you for your honesty. Actually, I should take this opportunity to thank all these readers for their honesty because, each in their own way, they overrode some of my stubbornness on certain sections. Thank you!
Stef. Once again I'm slow on getting my next book to you. It's not only you though, I think I'm just slow sometimes. I'll
have a couple months in the summer to catch up so I don't put you in a tight spot like I have been. Thank you for reading so quickly! Thank you for your honesty and telling me when things need cut. Thanks for making me feel super jealous that you get to experience spring while I get a 'bomb cyclone' and two extra months of winter.
Anwen. Thanks again to the amazing Anwen! I should write a children's book called The Amazing Anwen! I feel like it should be about a little girl who runs away from home and joins a circus and does trapeze stuff. Or maybe she solves mysteries? I don't know... it's up to you. I feel like I owe you a story for how much help you've given. Thank you.
Lost in a Book, Claudia and Lisa... I told you guys I'd have it for you a month earlier than it happened... but you didn't complain! Thank you for pointing out when my sentences sound a little weird.
Kay Jay: Thanks for being such a good final proof reader. :)
Thank you to my family for their assistance, especially my Editor in Chief.
Thank you all so much for your comments, encouragement and sharing my story with your friends. Love you!
Chris
Author's Biography
Chris is a writer from Midwest America and is patiently waiting for his wisteria to bloom. Later year, one branch had blooms, but he probably cut off all the others when he pruned it in February.
This year, he severely pruned the vines in October and didn't do anything in the spring.
If winter would just be over already, he could see if the pruning strategy worked.
He's much better at raising orchids than properly caring for wisteria.
PS: This April he is doing ab exercises every day. It's already helped his posture and should prepare him for an active summer. But let's not jinx anything.
The Lover (It's Just Us Here Book 4) Page 37