Gwen smiled at her mate and snuggled into his side. “Nick wants to learn how to do that, but for now, he just has to be patient and wait for the Moon to guide him into using its power.”
Nick shrugged. “Hey, I’ll get it eventually. One step at a time.”
While the Alpha took a moment to answer some questions, Ava’s attention shifted to her left inner thigh. It was burning again. She had a mark like the shiny moons reflected on Nick and Gwen’s hands. Ava had a Moon Mark too, but it wasn’t a beautiful thing like Nick had described. Hers was a malicious mark, a curse given to her by the Moon. Why had the Moon decided to curse her though? Did it know Ava would come to strip the Wolf from one of its shifters and disguise herself with it and infiltrate a pack? She always dreamed of the White Wolf. Now things were fully manifesting, coming full circle.
“I knew there was something special about Gwen when I first met her,” Nick continued. “I knew she was my Fated Mate even though I couldn’t put it to words at the time.” He held his mate tighter, possessive. “Fated Mates are a little tricky. I’m not gonna lie to you and tell you each of you has one. When I was a pup, I used to think everyone was supposed to, but after seeing what I’ve seen and after talking to Trinity, it turns out Fated Mates are rare pairs picked by the Moon. It’s not something I can prepare you for, but if you feel a strong pull to someone, I’d advise you not to ignore it.”
“So, you’re basically saying our fate could be rigged by the Moon?” One Awakened Wolf asked with his arms folded, clearly not thrilled with the idea.
“You won’t feel that way when you find your Fated Mated,” Nick replied. “Gwen completes me. The Moon knew I needed her. Isabelle, the Trinity Shifter I talked to about this, says not all of us need a Fated Mate. It doesn’t mean you won’t find happiness or the perfect mate for you. It also doesn’t mean that mate you picked won’t ever have a Lunas Sigil shared between the two of you. Anything is possible. The Moon takes care of us.”
Fated Mates. Ava wished more than anything at that moment that she could have been born a wolf shifter. If that were the case, maybe her mark could have meant she was Max’s Fated Mate. Warm Max. Kind Max. But no. She was a danger to the Moon’s children, and that was why she was cursed. She was powerful, but she could not combat the strength of a god. She knew that since the first time she saw the White Wolf and he bit into her thigh.
“So yeah. Welcome to the supernatural,” Nick said as he held out his hands to indicate the world around them, the world the Awakened Wolves must have seen very differently now. “Not everything is sunshine and rainbows, though. There are a lot of dangers you’ll need to watch out for like witches.”
Ava flinched.
“Shifter collectors, too. The name is pretty self-explanatory. You’re valuable because of what you are. Some people want to own you and take advantage of you. Luckily, most of the world doesn’t know we exist. Humans are likely to be afraid of you, so I wouldn’t go around telling everyone you’re a wolf. Trinity wants to make the world a place where shifters can walk freely as what they are among humans instead of hiding like we do. I hope they succeed someday, but right now the world is what it is. Be smart. Even be careful of other shifters. Only a few months ago, my pack wasn’t so friendly.”
Nick’s normally hazel eyes blazed gold. “This next part is especially important. There’s been some trouble recently. A big and powerful grizzly bear shifter I met from Trinity and a black panther shifter are both currently in comas because they had a run in with a Black Witch. Black Witches can steal your free will and make you do anything they want. They are stronger than you.”
Unease wafted through the air as the Awakened Wolves around Ava all cast their gazes to the snow.
“But you’re all safe here,” Gwen assured. “And it’s time to test out this shifting thing. Let’s get you guys and gals comfortable with your wolves. Howard.” Gwen turned to an older wolf who was standing just outside of the group. “Howard is one of Nick’s Betas, second in command. He’ll be teaching you about shifting today. You don’t want to shift when you're cut up like my mate because it’ll take longer to heal. I can’t teach you because I can’t shift either.” She indicated her small and rounded belly. “Pregnant.”
Ava shook in her boots. Nick remembered that she wasn’t supposed to shift, right? She really didn’t want to. Her stolen wolf would go nuts. Nick probably sensed her fear, because he signaled her over and Gwen held out her hand. Ava joined them at Gwen’s side as Howard gathered the Awakened Wolves.
“It’s important to acknowledge the Wolf,” Howard said, taking over. “Even if you can’t shift, you should accept and take pride in what you are. Accept the Moon so you don’t go Berserker.”
“What does that mean?” an Awakened Wolf asked.
Nick replied, “It means you reject what you are and the Moon curses you for it. The Moon gave you a gift, the least you can do is be grateful for it. If you go Berserker, you’ll lose all your senses and become rabid. A mindless wild animal. You’d be a danger to shifters, but you’d be an even bigger danger to humans. Any Berserker to ever come from Blue Pack has been put down, but Trinity says there have been others that have made their way to humans and turned them. Berserker bites are poisonous. They pass on the Berserker sickness in the form of their own rabid animal, but since shifters already have an animal, a Berserker bite just hurts like hell for us.” Nick gently rubbed his sore neck.
“But that won’t happen to any of you,” Gwen said firmly.
Cedric, the snowy owl still perched on the Alpha Den’s roof, let out a soft twittering laugh along with a clacking noise as he closed his big golden eyes. Apparently, he thought Gwen’s statement was hilarious.
Nick glared up at the owl, his eyes bright yellow and sinister. He muttered, “Fuck off.” It was enough to get Cedric to stop laughing. He even took to the overcast sky on silent wings and glided down into the forest, leaving the wolves alone.
Cedric truly didn’t recognize Ava. He would have said something if he did. Beatrice ran a smooth operation. Ava wondered if Beatrice knew a restored shifter wouldn’t remember those few minutes they saw Ava as she stole their souls at Beatrice’s command. She probably did. Beatrice was careful about everything. She must have calculated the chance of one of their broken shifters regaining their senses because Trinity hardly knew anything about them. They didn’t know for a fact that she and Ava were the ones who put their grizzly and black panther in comas. All they could figure was it happened because of a Black Witch. They weren’t wrong, but they were in the dark about the details.
“Let’s get started,” Howard announced. He stripped his clothes quickly, exposing his naked skin to the cold. Ava watched unashamed. She had never seen a man naked before, but it elicited no reaction from her. She had never had any interest in men until Max. She noticed every inch of him and saw him in fine detail. Everyone else was a blur in her vision in comparison. Some Awakened Wolves averted their gaze in embarrassment at the display of nudity, mostly the females.
“Yeah, nudity is a part of the gig. Get over it,” Nick teased. “It’s not weird.”
“Maybe not for you, Mr. I-grew-up-as-a-wolf,” Gwen teased him right back.
Nick chuckled and kissed the top of her head.
Ava’s mind wandered. She watched the Awakened Wolves but her eyes were unseeing. She was picturing Max, wondering what he hid underneath his clothes. She saw his large and powerful arms because he wore a t-shirt to bed. His muscles amazed her because her own arms were comparable to twigs, skinny and clearly lacking in the muscle department. She remembered the way the t-shirt hugged his torso. She saw his nipples for an instant as they pressed against the fabric, the outline of his pecs, the ridges of his eight pack. Her face flushed with warmth. She wanted to see more. Touch more.
Focus.
She worried that someone nearby would have caught on to her daydreaming, but no one made any indication that they had. She stared at Howard as he finished explain
ing shifting to the other wolves. His body suddenly snapped and changed shape as brown fur exploded all over him. He wasn’t the White Wolf. She watched each of the Awakened Wolves as they did their best to follow suit. Some of them struggled, others shifted seamlessly. None of them wore a coat as white as snow. Ava released a shaky breath of relief.
Now she had a decision to make. She didn’t want to carry out Beatrice’s order, but if she refused, that would be a betrayal of the person who kept her alive all these years. If she did as Beatrice wanted, that would include enslaving Max. He would be the first target. He was the closest to her. They were staying in the same room.
She tried again to imagine Max mindless. He wouldn’t be able to talk to her freely anymore, to say what was on his mind. He wouldn’t be sweet. He wouldn’t feed her or worry about her damaged fingertips. He wouldn’t look at her with striking blue eyes that revealed his every emotion. He wouldn’t have emotion.
Max.
The wolf inside of Ava kept biting at the cage holding her there, reminding Ava of what she had done, of the most brutal thing she had done yet. She didn’t deserve Max. She didn’t deserve anyone. It was true. That was why people spat on her when she was a child all alone on the streets.
Ava squeezed her eyes shut.
Max thought she deserved his kindness.
She missed him. She wondered how bad his control over his wolf was since it warranted private lessons. He didn’t seem wild or out of control when she spent time with him last night and this morning. He was the exact opposite.
Ava’s thigh itched again, but she refused to give into the urge to dig. She looked out to Blue Forest in the distance. It was the real-life version of the blue forest in her dreams. The White Wolf was in there somewhere, but still, he did not show himself. She didn’t even dream of him last night.
Something wasn’t adding up, and the wolf in her middle was fighting worse than usual. She could feel her chipping away at the walls of her cage. Ava had held many souls, but she was having trouble holding this broken piece of a shifter. Maybe she wasn’t as strong as she thought.
Chapter 9
MAX STOOD OUTSIDE OF Julie’s door, loitering on her porch. He should knock and get it over with.
You know what she’s going to tell you.
“Ugh!” he grumbled to the sky.
He still needed to hear her say it. Maybe she’d surprise him and say something else! Maybe his Lunas Sigil had absolutely nothing to do with this Fated Mates business. It was entirely possible. It wasn’t impossible.
Mate. Beautiful mate.
Who was he kidding? He felt it with every fiber of his being. Wolf, human, he felt it.
Taking a deep breath, Max was finally readying himself to knock on the door when it came swinging inward, revealing Julie as she gave him a severe look. She pulled back her shoulder-length brown and gray-streaked hair into a ponytail and then wiggled her finger at him, gesturing for him to come inside. Max hesitated.
“Are you going to stand there all day?” she asked, raising an eyebrow. “You’ve wasted enough time already, Max.”
“Uh, yeah.” Max placed his hand on the back of his head and smiled apologetically. “Excuse me then.”
Julie opened the door wider, allowing him entry. He went right to her couch and sat down. She sat down beside him, still watching him with that inquisitive look on her face.
“So?” she asked. “Something is bothering you, and you decided to come to me. What is it?”
“I… I don’t understand what’s going on,” Max replied sheepishly. His face was already heating at the thought of Ava. She was tiny and adorable, and her touches were like the fluttering of butterfly wings. A delicate beauty with demons that told her she had to dig at herself, that told her she wasn’t enough. That was why she did it, right? Past trauma. Anxiety. He wanted to carry it for her. His beautiful girl shouldn’t ever be marked like that, especially not from her own doing.
His beautiful girl.
“It’s the new wolf,” Julie said as if it was obvious.
“What?” Max’s jaw dropped open.
“It’s painfully obvious. Everyone who has seen you two together knows.”
Max grimaced. God, he was embarrassed. Everyone knew how his dick reacted to her. Even if they couldn’t smell it, they could see it if they just looked. He was such a pervert.
Absentmindedly, Julie commented, “Ava is an unusual wolf.”
“She smells different, like the Wolf isn’t as prevalent in her as it is everyone else,” Max replied. He felt it too. Everyone had to. “What does it mean?”
Julie slowly moved her head from side to side. “I have no idea, but that wolf has dark secrets.”
Max bit his lip. How dark was dark and what did it mean? “I don’t know anything about that. I came to ask about a Lunas Sigil.”
“You have one then?” Julie beamed at him.
“But I don’t understand how. I haven’t done anything to… to make one appear?”
“You didn’t have to. Each of the Fated Mates we know personally has a different story to tell about how they got their marks.”
Max frowned. “But it’s so weird.”
“Max,” Julie said sternly as she made a clicking sound with her tongue at the back of her teeth. “The sooner you take the Moon’s guidance the better.”
“C’mon, Julie. You don’t think this is weird?”
“You’re still thinking like a human.”
“Yeah, yeah. And I’m not a human. Everyone keeps telling me that.”
“And you should start listening.” Julie sighed. “Where’s the mark?”
“My right thigh.” Max pressed his fingers to the mark unconsciously, hidden on the inside of his leg.
“Does Ava have one that mirrors yours?”
Max balked. “How would I know that?! It’s not like I went up to her and was like, ‘Hi, can you strip to your underwear so I can see if you have a mark that matches mine? Thanks.’ Just because she’s staying in the same room as me doesn’t mean we’re getting naked together.”
Julie raised an eyebrow at him and laughed. “You could just ask if she has a Moon Mark on her left thigh.”
“Uh, right.” His hand was basically plastered to the back of his head. It was something that happened without him noticing whenever he got uncomfortable. He forced his hands into his lap.
“Max, I think you know better than I do what’s going on between you two,” Julie said soothingly. “Ask Ava about the mark. Ask to see it for yourself if you can’t take her word for it. Then you’ll have all the proof you need.”
Check for himself? Max recalled walking in on Ava with her pants down, literally. She was sitting on her bed, her legs pressed together, so he certainly hadn’t seen the mark, but seeing so much of her bare skin, brown and warm in the light of the hotel room, got his dick talking. Aw shit.
Max shook his head to try and clear the lust-filled haze clogging his thought processors.
Julie gave him a smile and said, “You have it bad. If she feels the same way, you could see her mark easy.”
“I don’t know what you’re insinuating, but I don’t hop into bed with women I’ve just met.”
“You and I both know that doesn’t apply to Ava.” She placed her weathered hand on Max’s knee. “Stop. Running.”
“Thanks, Julie,” Max said as he stood abruptly. “I need to go.”
“Don’t run, Max.”
But he was already out the door. His wolf was growling in his chest.
“I’m going to Ava,” Max announced. That seemed to sate his wolf, like saying it out loud made it true—which it was.
Max scanned the Alpha Den, but the class had moved on. He spotted them at the edge of Blue Forest. Impatience overtook him, and he broke out into a run. He was anxious to see Ava. He wanted to make sure he was there when class ended. It didn’t matter that he’d be faced with a bunch of wolves. His wolf wasn’t going to fight.
When he neared t
he group, most of them were shifted into their wolves, but then he found Ava. She was curled in on herself, shaking and naked. Gwen was at her bare back trying to soothe her. Max could feel the wolf inside of Ava clearly now—and she was a monster. She wanted out, and she wasn’t taking no for an answer. He knew what that was like. Max ran over to Ava and crouched down in front of her.
“Her wolf is fighting. I told her she needs to shift,” Gwen explained.
Max gently stole Ava’s hands from her face and spoke in a low voice, “It’s okay, Ava. You can shift. It’ll be better to right now. We’ll bandage up your fingers again later, okay?” Max’s wolf side was right there with him. He would change and protect her. “I’ll shift with you. It’ll be easy. We’ll figure this out together.”
Ava’s shallow breaths evened out some as she looked up into his eyes. Her eyes were wavering, shimmering back and forth in a quick succession. Sweat was dripping down her forehead. Max held her gaze, letting her know he was right there with her. He continued to hold her gaze even as he slowly backed away from her.
“Max,” Nick warned.
“Let him,” Gwen said quickly as she pointed down the tree line. “Howard, take the others farther away.”
Max heard the resounding crunch of snow as the wolves who were behind him took off. He took a steady breath. His wolf was calm. That familiar wild energy was there too, but it had direction. He was determined. He was going to help his Fated Mate. He wouldn’t lose his mind as a wolf. Not this time. His left inner thigh burned, but he ignored it. Now wasn’t the time to appreciate Ava’s perfect boner inducing body or to try and catch a glimpse of the Lunas Sigil she must have had. She needed him to stabilize her.
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