by C R Riley
Chapter 21
Larkin
I splash water in my face to help me calm down. My hands are still shaking from the little rant I had a few minutes ago. I still can’t believe I just blurted that all out in front of my parents.
When they called a few days ago to confirm everything with me, my mother questioned me right away about why I sounded different. I hadn’t realized I sounded different, however according to her my voice had joy back in it.
My parents have been worried about me for a long while now. Always said my light didn’t shine as brightly as it once had. Supported me when I decided to leave Chicago and work anywhere my company wanted to send me. Visited me when they could, which wasn’t all that often. Called me weekly to check in, making sure I always understood that they were there for me if and when I needed them. So, I knew they paid attention to how I sounded on the phone, even if I didn’t.
Without hesitation I told my mother about the new man in my life. Shared with her how we met and listened to her laughter.
My father and her had a similar kind of encounter. He’d however been the one stumbling around, knocking things over when she showed up for a consultation in his ER. A new pediatric surgeon, who up until my father’s clumsy introduction, had ignored all the other male doctor’s that had hit on her. The gangly blonde handsome doctor, who was normally very suave and charming, known to make old ladies swoon, made her laugh harder than she had in a long time and later secured a date. She always said that it was hard to resist a man that literally tripped over his own feet whenever he looked at you.
I then told her that he was also the King of Hermosa Islas and the story behind how he told me. Went on to share about the celebration and how I freaked out and why. Heard her sighs of concern, then laughter again when I explained that he kissed me to shut me up. Gave her all the details that happened later and listened as her tongue click in disapproval, but eventually turn back to awes of approval.
Her sympathy over my struggle when he left me hanging, reminded me of all those times she comforted me as a kid. I remember us talking once during that time and how she had questioned why I sounded sad. I had blown it off as nothing and quickly changed the subject. Like I said my parents know me very well and nothing got past them when we talk. She expressed how she wished I had opened up to her then, so she could have offered me a few words of encouragement. Given me some advice even on what to do when he came back, although she had agreed with how I handle that.
I didn’t disclose many more detail after that. Didn’t share all the subjects we discussed after Antonio and I talked Wednesday night. There were facts I wasn’t ready to share with my mother; I wasn’t sure how she would take it all. Parts of that discussion seemed very private, an exclusive conversation between Antonio and myself that I didn’t want others to know yet. One that didn’t need to involve those who weren’t living the lives we lived.
When I picked my parents up at the airport earlier, I’d only mentioned that we would be having dinner with him. They both were fine with that. Anxious to meet the man who had me smiling when I talked about him. My father had wrapped me in his arms and held on tight as he whispered how happy he was to have me back. I nearly cried, maybe I did, because I was happy to be back.
Since then we had spent the last several hours catching up. Talking about nothing and everything. Although I avoided going into more details about what had occurred these last couple of days between Antonio and me. Mostly because I didn’t want to talk about Randal with them, I knew how they felt. I had finally put all that behind me and I didn’t want to think about that now. All they needed to know was that Antonio and I were dating, and that it could be serious.
He’d defiantly proven that point when he publicly kissed me in the hotel lobby. I knew he was up to something when he sent me that text.
When we talked earlier the stress in his voice came across loud and clear. I hated that he was dealing with things on his own. Going and consoling a family that had something horrible happen to them. I hated it more once I learned it was Lady Dalia’s family, for reasons I felt guilty about. If my parents hadn’t been coming in, I would have asked him if it were possible for me to join him. Support him while he did the right thing and let her know that as her King he cared, as her King. I had this gut reaction that warned me she hoped for more still, and would do whatever was required of her to get it. I didn’t trust her and later would inquire about that meeting when we were alone.
I felt like dinner went well after that. My parents seemed to like Antonio. Knew how to address him formally—not at all a surprise since they have both been exposed to world leaders before. (Time out for a minute. Wow. World leaders. I am dating a man who is considered a world leader. Mind blowing up here.) Respected him when he asked them to call him Antonio, making everything seems so normal. It had all been going so very well, until my mother asked me about Tokyo.
Tokyo. Why had I not thought to mention that before? Probably because I knew that for now it was on the back burner. Thus, hearing Antonio sternly question me about my timeline, like he was suggesting I would rush a job, since I obviously had a better one lined up thousands of miles away from him, bugged the heck out of me. It had burned me after our long discussion a few nights ago, when he had forced me to open up. That he thought I would keep something like that from him after everything that had been said that night. After he had expressed his feelings, his alleged feelings, in such a beautiful and honest way.
And that had sent me into a mini rant. I let him have it in a much calmer way than usual. I didn’t speak in that fast-uncontrolled way I had done so many times before. This time I spoke at a more normal speed, even though I let my thoughts just spill out.
Which now has me gripping the sink hard again, as those last words replay over and over in my mind. I’m not going to quit my job just because I fell in love with a king and suddenly find myself as his queen. This queen will work if she wants to work, just try to stop me.
My mother’s soft hand lands on my back as her eyes meet mine in the mirror. She used the restroom first before approaching me. Knowing I needed time to catch my breath before I would be ready to listen.
She turns on the faucet and begins washing her hands. “I like him. I know I said that before, but I mean it.”
I start to say something, except the words get stuck in my throat. Consequently, I lean over again and splash more cold water in my face. It’s a good thing I have makeup in my clutch tonight.
“He likes you too. A good man all the way around. It’s in the eyes, your father had the same kind eyes.” She leans forward as she reapplies her lipstick. “Besides the clumsy man who couldn’t seem to move inside that small room without knocking something else over, capturing my attention. It was the second thing I noticed when he peeked up at me, kind blue eyes that expressed I could trust him.
“That’s an important thing you know. To be able to trust the person long before you ever really get to know them. I have always found that the eyes are the windows to the soul. They reveal so much if you take the time to study them.
“Your eyes have always been able to give me a proper read on your moods. The first time I saw those soft blue eyes I knew you were a lost soul searching for your place in this world. You found it with us for a very long time. We were your safe place. But every soul eventually needs to be set free to wander again. You started feeling lost again long before we set you free though. Found a safe place for a while, where you learned some very valuable lessons that we couldn’t teach you.
“Every person has a path they must travel to discover where they belong. Some find it quickly and easily. Others never find it really, they settle for less, sometimes more than once. Some just wander aimlessly, not wanting to settle at all. It’s a journey, and one never knows where it will take them, but we all must take it. If a person is smart, she places that journey in God’s hands and ask him to help lead her to where he wants her to end up.
“I beli
eve my sweet Larkin, that your path ends here, if you want it to that is. Of course, there are other paths out there, if you don’t trust this is the life God has chosen for you. Although after that little speech, I think deep down you already know your place in this life is with him. You feel it here in your heart. Picture it here in your mind. Know it when you gaze into his eyes and find him looking as intensely back at you.”
My mother has always been able to calmly tell me what she believes I need to hear. Reading my mind with just one look and then saying exactly the right words to pull me back.
I take a few deep breaths and fix my makeup. As I am reapplying my lipstick I glance fondly over at my mother. I have always thought her to be very pretty, and even at sixty-seven I still see it. Very few wrinkles or blemishes, even her dark hair doesn’t give her age away. Dye I guess will help with that. My mother claims it’s the gift God gave women so they can age gracefully. And my mother has aged as gracefully as possible.
“So, what do you suppose Daddy is telling my King?” I have never called Antonio that before, but I like how it sounds. My King and I don’t necessarily mean a leader with power, but the man who rules my heart. I know cheesy right.
“Probably one of those stupid jokes he has floating around in his head.” My mother laughs. “I hope he doesn’t pull out any king or noble ones.”
We are both laughing when we walk back to the table.
They are both sipping coffee while gabbing like men. Right as we sit my father asks Antonio if he likes chess.
“Sam no.” My mother warns him. “Please love. Your daughter is trying to impress this man.”
My father leans over and kisses my mother as he stares deeply into her eyes. The love that passes between them after thirty-three years of marriage is refreshing.
I want that. Always have. To love someone so much that even through all the trials life throws at us, we end up stronger in the end.
My parents demanding jobs never got between them. They always supported the other person while encouraging them to do whatever they felt was the path God was leading them down. Showed me that two people could have a happy marriage, even when there were times they had to live apart. My mother always said it was her knowing without a doubt that my father loved her completely making things easier. They talked daily, sometimes multiple times a day, to keep the lines of communication open. When the other person needed them, they found a way to be there for them. The key my father always said was to never take the other person for granted. Never assume they know what you are thinking. Tell them as many times a day as you can how you feel. Show them as many ways as you can think of how important they are to you. Then let those around you witness it with their own eyes, leaving little doubt where your heart and soul lives. You do that not just for your spouse, but also for yourself. Marriage is a work in progress and requires both parties to stay focused.
“Better?” I hear Antonio’s voice ask as he watches me watching them.
I turn my gaze his way and nearly fall out of my chair again. One glimpse into those eyes and I see my future as clear as day reflecting back at me. “Yes.”
“So, Antonio do you like chess?” My father chuckles when my mother sighs loudly.
“I do.” He answers as he reaches under the table and takes my hand. “Always been one of my favorite games to pass the time.”
“Perfect. Most men like us enjoy chess. It’s a strategy game that requires focus. Lose that focus and you lose the game.
“Life and chess are similar in many ways I believe. We make our move; one we believe will help us win, and our opponent contours. Each piece on the board has rules that it must follow. The rook can move any number of vacant spaces forward, backwards, left or right in a straight line. The bishop can only move diagonally as many vacant spaces as available, staying on the same color throughout the game. The knight can move in a two by three rectangle and is the only piece that can jump over another piece, so to speak. The pawn moves one space at a time, slowly making his way across the board. Those four pieces are critical to the game and you need them working together so that you can protect the King. Although the Queen is probably one of the most useful pieces, because she can move all over the board, much like the rook. Does what she has to do to protect the King.”
There is a pause as my father takes a sip of his coffee. His eyes light up with mischief and I glance at my mother in time to catch her rolls her eyes again. “You know what I find ironic about the game of chess. It’s how these two pieces reflect the relationship between a husband and a wife. The poor king can only move one space at a time, while his counterpart the mighty queen, can do whatever she likes.”
The roar of laughter that comes out of Antonio only encourages my father. He starts spilling out one-liners until they both can no longer speak. Some of them I have heard, some are new. My poor mother can only sit back and agitate her head while her husband shows his true colors.
“Okay. Sorry. I just couldn’t help myself. So, shall we leave these two alone for a while Ellie.” My father asks my mother as he kisses her hand.
They both stand and say their goodbyes. My father is still chuckling some as he escorts my mother out, she is giving him her little speech about how she can’t believe he went there.
“Sorry about that.” I take a sip of my water. “He has a very interesting sense of humor.”
“Your father is very comical. I enjoyed getting to know him, your mother also by the way. Miss Cross is there someplace we can go talk?” He scans around the private dining area. “While this is nice, and seems private, it’s not really. Not as private as I’d like at least.”
“We could go to my suite I suppose. My parents are staying with me, but if I know them, they are heading to bed. It’s been a long day for them and its long past their bed time.”
Antonio stands and offers me his arm. “What will they all say when they see us heading upstairs?”
“Oh. I never thought.” I blush. “Maybe we should …”
“Nope. I’m definitely going to your suite. I’m done worrying about what other’s think. Do you know what bothers me more?” He leads me to the door and then informs his men of our plans.
“No.” I answer as we begin following them to one of the elevators.
“None of them would have a problem with me escorting one of the chosen to her hotel suite. They wouldn’t find it scandalous. Instead they’d probably hope that one thing would lead to another, and later it would require a quick marriage.” Antonio reveals after stepping onto the elevator. “If not that than at least they would be anticipating a proclamation, stating I am in the process of courting my future queen with an engagement to follow shortly.”
“I see.” I nervously touch my face. “How long does this courting process usually last?”
“Traditional courting rituals usually last a few months. It’s an allotted time period that gives both parties the chance to really get to know the other person.” Antonio sounds like he has experienced it before.
“Have you ever courted anyone before?” I don’t know why I ask, but the tension that takes over his body tells me it was a good question. “You have.”
Sadness takes over his face as he nods once. “I have.”
“Lady Dalia.” Her name is the first one that comes to mind. “That’s why she is so obsessed with you. Were you two engaged?”
“No!” His voice is loud and unexpected. “No.”
My next words come out without much thought. “But that was the plan wasn’t it. It was expected that once you started courting her that an engagement would soon follow.”
Realization slaps me across the face, as I think about how that woman has looked at him those few times I was around. She knows him better than me probably, how much better I wonder.
Antonio squeezes my hand once. “Yes Larkin. Which is why courting a woman first is always best. When a man courts a woman there is an expectation of an announcement, most of the time there is one. But unt
il an engagement is announced a man is allowed to simply change his mind, no questions asked. After an announcement however, it all becomes more complicated, good solid reasons must be given to break an engagement, at least for a man in my position. Luckily enough for me it never got that far with Lady Dalia, I was able to just end things between us.”
We reach my suite door and I suddenly have second thoughts about inviting him inside. I spin to face him and am very happy to see his men have given us some privacy. That makes it much easier to ask my next question that is hanging on the tip of my tongue. “Did you love her?”
“Can we discuss this inside please?” There is pain in his eyes. “Please.”
“Did you love her?” I ask again.
Hanging his head, he closes his eyes and shakes his head. “If I did, I no longer do now.”
“So, is that a yes then?” I’m not giving up; I want him to say it if he did.
He yanks the key card from my hand as he mutters several words in either Spanish or Portuguese. I’m not sure which one, but the way the words flow from his lips, I know that he knows them well. He swipes the card and shoves the door open, nodding for me to enter.
“Is that a yes?” I stand my ground not budging.
A low growl comes from deep inside of him. Before I know it, he has lifted my feet off the ground and is transporting me inside. Once we are far enough through the door, he kicks it closed with his foot and set me down.
I take a step back from him and cross my arms. “Answer me.”
Antonio crosses his arms mimicking mine. We stare at each other for a very long time. Pain so very deep inside of him can be seen behind those expressive eyes.
Finally, he throws his hands in the air and roars. “Yes, I loved her! Is that what you wanted to hear Larkin? That at one time I love another. That I once thought she was the one. Planned on asking her to marry me. Even secured her a very lovely expensive ring. Had it all arranged. Knew the perfect location. Practiced the words until I had them memorized. How if I hadn’t stopped that day to listen to her discussing how her plans where all going so well with her sisters and her mother, then I would be married to her right now.