by Mia Archer
I calmed myself by imagining her head getting bashed against one of the mirrors. Preferably with my hand gripping her hair and doing some of the shoving.
"Calm down!" she said. "God. I say one thing and you’re raging around here like a bulldyke in a China shop."
"Tara," I said, my voice quiet but threatening.
Usually that quiet threat was enough to get her to back down. She had to know I wasn’t afraid to throw down in the name of defending my honor. I’d dealt with plenty of bullies over the years who thought they could get one over on me because of who I chose to love, and I sure as hell wasn't going to put up with it from her.
Yet at the same time I felt my cheeks burning. I felt some of the old shame I felt back when I was dealing with those bullies when I was younger. Back before I didn't have the ability to cope that I had now.
I hated that Tara was able to make me feel ashamed of who I was, even if it was all on her. Even if she was the one being a raging bitch.
"Say one more thing Tara,” I said.
The other girls had formed a semicircle behind me. Though I wasn't sure if they'd formed that semicircle because they wanted to stand behind me, or because they wanted a good view of the brewing fight and none of them wanted to risk stepping around me for a better view.
"Are you threatening me?" she asked.
"I'm not threatening you," I replied. "I'm promising you. Say one more thing and this isn't going to end well for you."
Tara held my gaze for a long moment. Long enough that I thought she might actually go through with it. Sure in the past she'd always backed down when it came down to it, but there had to be a time when she got pushed to the edge.
Heck, she'd certainly pushed me to the edge. I wanted to launch myself at her even though I'd given her a warning and told her to back down. I wanted to dig my hands into her hair and rip it out. Punch her and give her a black eye so she wouldn't be able to go out on stage and make any money.
But I held back, because that's what civilized people did. I wasn't going to stoop to her level if I didn't have to. Not that I was against stooping to her level, I just wanted to avoid it if at all possible.
Especially considering an assault charge was the last thing I needed.
"Fine," she said. "If you want to freak out and be a bitch then you can freak out. I don't want to get in a fight with a crazy."
"I'll show you crazy if you keep this up," I said, balling my hand into a fist. But I didn’t make a move for her. If she was going to back down then I wasn't going to try and get into a fight.
"God, can you believe what a bitch she is?" Tara asked as she made her way across the room to her mirror. "I was joking around with her and she goes crazy."
She tried to sound light and breezy, but from of the way everyone else in the room stopped and stared at her it wasn't working. No, at least I could be happy that everybody else in the room was on my side. Even if I hadn't quite had the satisfactory ending to this little argument that I was hoping for.
"God you're all such bitches,” Tara said when she realized she wasn't going to get any support from anyone else in the room. "I don't know why I still come around here. I have to worry about getting checked out in the changing room and I also have to worry about all of you liking it. You're all a bunch of lesbians."
I wheeled around. I couldn't help it. If she couldn't keep her mouth shut then I was going to challenge her on her bullshit.
"Did somebody do something to you?" I asked.
Tara turned and glared. "What are you talking about?"
"You have this irrational hatred of lesbians. I'm wondering who hurt you. What the hell is going on here?"
Tara rolled her eyes. "That's none of your damn business. I've had a problem with you people checking me out and I don't want any more of it."
"I don't care what's happened to you in the past," I said. “You need to treat me with respect now, and if you can't then maybe you should think about going somewhere else."
Tara threw her head back and laughed. “What the fuck are you going to do about it? As long as I keep making money they're not firing my ass!"
I looked down. She was probably right. I hated that she was probably right.
Not to mention that if the rumors were to be believed there were some fringe benefits she gave the owner that I wasn't willing to provide. That I wouldn't provide even if I was into guys.
"Go fuck yourself Tara," I said.
"I'd rather fuck myself than you," she said. "And you'd better be careful yourself. Don't bring that bitch around here if you know what's good for you."
I opened my mouth to say something in response and then closed it. I didn't need trouble like this right now. I didn't need someone calling me in for assault charges. I didn't need to get fired from my job because she goaded me into starting a fight.
And so I did something that I absolutely hated. I went back over to my mirror and sat down. Started getting ready for my next dance. I wasn't going to do anything productive by continuing a fight with Tara.
It reminded me of an old saying. Wrestle with a pig and the pig has all the fun while you get covered in mud. Never had that felt more appropriate than arguing with Tara. So I ignored her.
Even when she laughed and said "that's what I thought."
"You really need to shut the fuck up Tara," Tiffany said.
"Yeah," another girl said. “You need to watch yourself."
Other girls chimed in and I looked up in surprise. I suddenly felt a little better. It was nice to know they had my back.
Tara looked around and she seemed to sense that the mood in the room was turning against her. The mood in the room had never really been in her favor, but now it was really looking bad for her.
Her eyes went wide, and finally she let out a disgusted noise and stood.
"Fine," she spat. "If you're all going to be bitches then I'm going to go out there where somebody appreciates me."
"They only appreciate you as long as you're willing to give it up," Tiffany said. “Don't think I don't know what you did with that ‘private dance’ last week."
I shook my head. Was there something going on there that I didn't know about? That was a dangerous accusation to throw around. There were a lot of things the owner put up with, but accepting money for sex acts was one quick way to get fired on the spot. A girl could get in even deeper trouble if the cops came along.
If Tara really was doing something like that then it could be bad for her and for everyone else. The authorities could come in and shut the place down.
Though unemployment might almost be worth it to see her getting in trouble.
"What's that Tara? Taking a little money for sex? Can't get a guy to give it to you for free?"
She wheeled around and her eyes went wide as she realized what I was saying. The old switcheroo. I stuck my tongue out and flipped her the bird as she stepped out of the room in a huff.
Was it childish? Maybe, but it felt good so I wasn't going to feel too bad. I turned to Tiffany.
"Are you serious about that? Was she really fucking someone for money?"
Tiffany shrugged. "Seems like the sort of thing she’d do, and the way she reacted makes me think she might’ve actually done it.”
I looked past her. To the door Tara had just vacated pretty damn quick. Maybe there really was something there, though I couldn't for the life of me figure out what I was supposed to do with that information.
Still, it was good to keep in mind. Every weapon I had against her was something I might be able to use someday.
But that day wasn’t today. I resumed putting my makeup on, and I couldn't stop thinking about that threat she'd made. That she might do something to Taylor if she ever came around here again.
I didn't know what that something was, but I knew I didn't want to drag Taylor into the middle of this. No, not and risk ruining the good thing I had going with her.
I comforted myself with the knowledge that it's not like she’d b
e coming out here again. Not when the first time she came out was with a group of guys who were here for a bachelor party.
No, we didn't get many women coming through here. It had been a fluke that brought Taylor here, though I was certainly glad that fluke brought her into my arms.
Yeah, I figured I didn't have much to worry about on that count.
15
Taylor
"Are you sure about this?"
I wasn't sure about it. I kept thinking about the conversation I had with the guys, with Jason in particular, a couple of weeks back. Where he couldn't seem to get over who I was dating. Where even the other guys acted a little weird about the fact that I was dating a stripper.
Yeah, thinking about that made me wonder if this was really a good idea. If I really should be bringing Jasmine to a work party of all things.
And yet I was taking her to the party. Supposedly it was because we had a good quarter, but it was also an unofficial party thrown by the owner to celebrate Stephen's impending marriage. He’d be there with his blushing bride who was a cutie. Not that I thought about that too often considering he was a colleague and she was very straight.
I forced myself to turn to Jasmine. To smile. She seemed to take that smile for reassurance as the elevator continued up to the office.
The things were slow in this building. The office was only on the fifth floor, and yet I could have been to the top of the Sears Tower observation deck by now in the time it took to go up those five floors.
"It's going to be fine," I lied. "If you're going to date me you have to meet my friends and coworkers, right?"
Jasmine let out a quiet laugh that didn't hold much amusement. "You mean the coworkers I don't already know?"
"Exactly!" I said. "I guess you have met most of the guys already, but you haven't gotten a chance to really talk with them."
Of course I conveniently left out the fact that she didn't get a chance to talk with the guys because she'd been busy dancing up on stage when she saw them the first time around. We'd settled into a routine where we didn't really talk about her work all that often. It was enough to make me wonder if she was ashamed of it or something.
Well I wasn't going to be ashamed of it. And Jason could go fuck himself if he thought I was going to get bent out of shape because he didn't approve of who I dated.
He wouldn't be the first or the last person who didn't approve of who I dated. When that list includes people who were supposed to love you unconditionally like your parents then dealing with some asshole from the office didn't feel like such a big deal.
"You know I haven't been back to your work since that night," I said.
The words hung out there between us. It stretched into an awkward silence like it always did when I brought up her work.
Heck, I'm not sure why I decided to bring up her work. It was like I was picking at a scab or something. I couldn't resist even though I knew it was a bad idea.
"Yeah," she said, again with one of those humorless laughs. "How about that?"
How about that indeed. I got the same feeling I got every time we started talking about her work. The feeling that she was putting me off. That she was keeping something from me.
Maybe it was shame, or maybe it was something else. It was enough to make me want to go back to that club and see what the heck was going on.
A part of me couldn't help but wonder if she was cheating on me or something. I knew that was a ridiculous notion, but she was so private about that side of her life. And that was a side of her life that was a pretty big deal. She took her clothes off and had to get up close and personal with people.
I knew I shouldn’t hold that against her, yet here we were.
It was funny. It was that same jealousy I felt that first night whenever I saw her getting close with people up on stage, only now it was made all the more intense thanks to all the time we'd spent together.
Thankfully the elevator finally slid open with a loud screech that couldn't mean anything good. There were times when I almost wanted to take the stairs because they seemed safer.
Jasmine let out a small sigh. As though she was relieved the doors were opening. Which made me wonder why she would be relieved to be away from that conversation.
Not that I got much time to think about the reason why she might be relieved. No, not when I was immediately greeted by a familiar voice.
"Taylor!"
I stepped off the elevator and Stephen was there in the lobby. He had his future wife with him, and once again I couldn't help but notice how incredibly hot she was.
Admittedly I wasn't exactly a fan of the male form, but looking at her made it pretty obvious that somehow this geeky but lovable goof had found some way to convince this woman who should have been way out of his league that he was marriage material.
Then again maybe it was that geeky but lovable vibe he gave off that attracted her in the first place. Different strokes for different folks and all that. Maybe she preferred lovable and funny to ripped and hot.
"It's so good to see you Stephen," I said. "And how are you doing tonight Carrie?"
“Just fine Taylor!" she said, reaching out and pulling me into a hug that was unexpected but also kind of nice. Then she pushed me away and she had a glowing smile on her face that was easily the match of any goofy grin Stephen could fix me with.
"And is this the new girl I've heard so much about?" she asked.
"None other than!" I said.
"It's so nice to meet you," she said.
She reached out and offered a hand for Jasmine into a shaker. I was a little relieved she didn't go in for the hug. They hardly knew each other, after all, and she could be a little touchy-feely. Which was just fine with me, but I wasn't sure how Jasmine would react to that.
"All good things I hope," Jasmine said, some tension coming to her voice.
Another one of those awkward moments settled between us. I have no doubt Jasmine was thinking about her profession again. Damn. She seemed to be carrying a chip on her shoulder about about for some reason. That chip hadn't been there when we first started hanging out, but it had gotten worse and worse right along with her becoming more and more reluctant to talk about her job.
It was enough to make me wonder what the hell was going on there, but I hadn't pried too deeply because I didn't want to irritate her. Things had been going so well otherwise.
“Of course,” Carrie said, either not picking up on the tension or ignoring it.
"So are you ready for the party?" Stephen asked.
"You know it!" I said to pierce that awkward silence. The last thing I wanted was for Jasmine to make things really weird between me and my coworker.
Stephen made a sweeping gesture towards the door and I went and opened, letting everyone go in before me. Jasmine paused for a moment at the entrance, looking around at the boring sight of a bunch of coworkers hanging out at your average run-of-the-mill office party, then she took a deep breath, let it out, and plastered a smile on her face.
Though I didn't miss how she took a moment to plaster that smile on her face. Yeah, something was going on here and I would've really liked to know what the hell it was. But I kept my mouth shut.
I was especially interested in keeping the peace tonight, after all. I didn't want to have a blow up in front of a bunch of my coworkers.
"I'm going to go get something to drink,” I said. "Do you want something Jasmine?"
"I'm fine," she said, still looking around the room. She had a strange look in her eyes. As though she felt hunted or something. Weird. What was with her tonight?
"I think I'll join you," Stephen said. "Will you be okay here for a few baby?"
"Sure thing," Carrie said. “I’ll let Jasmine in on all the juicy office gossip I'm not supposed to know."
I tried to laugh but couldn’t quite work up the nerve. Instead I turned and went for a small minibar set up on a folding table at one end of the main lobby.
"So what's going on with you
r girlfriend tonight?" Stephen asked as soon as we were out of earshot.
"I don't know what you're talking about," I said.
"Come on," he said. "You don't take me for an idiot, do you?"
"Well no," I said. "I take you for a pretty smart guy. Why?"
"Something's bothering that girl," he said. "I might not be the greatest with women, but even I can tell that.”
“Not good with women? Says the man who’s about to get married to one of the hottest girls at the party tonight!" I said.
Stephen stared across the room and got a stupid look on his face. A look I recognized as that of a man who knew he needed to get down on his knees every night and thank whatever God he believed in that he'd gotten with a girl as gorgeous as her.
"Yeah, that might be the case, but still…"
I sighed. "I don't know what's going on. It's like she's pulling away from me or something. It's like…"
I stopped. I really didn't know what it was like. After all, things had been going so well, and they were still going well enough. As long as we avoided the subject of where she worked.
“Let's get a drink and hope that maybe makes things a little better," Stephen said. "Carrie wasn't exactly the greatest at the first couple of parties I took her to after all."
"You got that right," I said, remembering the frosty reception she'd given everyone. It turned out she was just shy around people she didn’t know all that well. But there'd been a few gatherings where everybody thought she was a raging bitch until we got everything sorted.
I turned around and Carrie was there in the crowd looking around, but Jasmine was nowhere to be found. I frowned, and a sixth sense starting to tingle in the back of my mind. Something was wrong.
I'm not sure how I knew something was wrong, it was just an instinctive feeling that came over me. I scanned through the crowd of office workers, people I was familiar with and people who worked in other departments I was less familiar with, looking for Jasmine and not finding her. Getting more and more worried with every passing moment I couldn't find her.