by Lynn Mann
‘Well, um I wouldn’t put it quite like that, I mean the other Horse-Bonded are helping me too, in fact I wouldn’t have been able to do what I have without them. And it’s Jack who’s helping most of the people who ask for help to be able to multiskill – he’s the best at helping them to open up to knowing they can do it, although Vic and I help him out if there are too many people for him to be able to see them all...’
‘But none of it would be happening without you, would it? Without you and Infinity?’ my mother persisted.
‘Mum give her a break, she’s trying to be modest and you’re ruining it for her,’ said Con, winking at me, ‘and for Dad, he’s trying very hard not to look pleased that she inherited at least one attribute from him.’
I threw a cushion at Con. ‘And what exactly do you mean by that, brother of mine?’ I said. ‘Which attributes have I inherited from Mum?’
Robbie chuckled. ‘You walked right into that one, mate,’ he said to Con.
Con was unfazed. ‘Now let’s see. You’re determined and you won’t be moved once you have an idea in your head. You have a tendency to be melodramatic...’
‘I do not!’
‘...a pile of belongings left on a cloak with no sign of what happened to their owner would tend to disagree with you there, Am, and lastly, you appear to have inherited her overwhelming desire to love everyone.’
My mother said, ‘oh Con!’ and hugged him, her tears wetting the shoulder of his shirt.
‘Oh Con? Is that all you can say, Mum? What about our apparent tendency for stubbornness and melodrama?’ I said, laughing.
‘Well he’s not wrong, is he dear,’ said my mother, winking before turning to pick up the tea tray.
My family collapsed into laughter at my stunned face. I was Aware that my mother felt calmer than normal, despite the emotion of my homecoming; the light that I had sent to infuse her the previous day was still providing comfort and allowing her to merely feel her emotions instead of being overwhelmed by them. As I joined in with the laughter, I made a mental note that opening people to multiskill wasn’t the only thing we should be offering to help people to do.
Aunt Jasmine assured me at dinner that evening that my friends were all well fed and rested and had spent the day enjoying exploring Rockwood and meeting its inhabitants. They had been called on by many villagers to ask their horses for advice about differing matters, and all of those who had asked had apparently been very happy with the counsel they had received. Apparently, Jack had been in much demand for his ability to open people up to being able to multiskill and there had been a steady stream of people visiting Holly’s house to see him.
‘Do any of you want to be able to do any of the Skills other than those you trained for?’ I asked my family.
‘I dunno Am, I had enough trouble training to be an Earth-Singer, it all sounds like a lot of work to me,’ said Robbie.
‘But it would be worth the effort to be able to weather-sing,’ said Con. ‘Just think about it, Rob, being able to keep the rain away until we’ve finished earth-singing for the day, that would be useful, and it would be pretty amazing to be able to do the Healing Skills, but I never showed any aptitude for those at testing.’
‘Con it doesn’t matter!’ I was unable to keep exasperation out of my voice. ‘You showed aptitude for the Skills that you thought you would show aptitude for when you were tested, but the Skills are all the same. All you need to do is to know that you can do any of them that you want to, and you’ll be able to do them, with no training, just the absolute knowledge you can do it. Apart from herbalism – obviously with that, you need to learn which plants are which, where to find them, how to store them, all of that, but apart from that, no training is needed!’
‘But how come in practice, people aren’t finding that what you’re saying is the case, Amarilla? Everyone who has tried to believe that they can do any of the Skills has found that they can still only do the ones for which they showed aptitude and for which they were trained,’ said my father.
‘And there’s the problem. They’ve tried to believe that they can do other Skills. They have to KNOW they can do them and there is a world of difference between believing and knowing. I know how hard it is to make the jump between the two, because I found it difficult even with Infinity’s coaching. That’s why we’re offering to help people to open up to KNOWING that the ability to perform any of the Skills is inherent in all of us. After all, the first Rock-Singers, Earth-Singers, Tree-Singers and Glass-Singers had no training, they merely remembered knowledge that was buried in the human psyche. That remembering was stimulated by precise wording that Jonus, the first Horse-Bonded, told them, words given to him by his horse, Mettle. You all know that as well as I do.’
My father nodded, thoughtfully. ‘And that is what Jack is doing? Telling people words given to him by his horse – Candour, isn’t he called? – so that they remember they can do it? So that they know they can do it?’
‘That’s exactly it. Jack is particularly good at helping people to remember what they know because he’s very articulate and very honest. He delivers the words that people need to hear, gently but with no concern over how they will be received, and he leaves people with no doubt that what he says is the truth. They take his words deeply within themselves and in no time, they know that they can do any of the Skills they want – and they can.’
‘And you can help people in this way too?’ my mother said.
‘In many cases, yes, but not all. Those where I fail are usually because the person is struggling to trust me because of how young and inexperienced I am.’
‘WHAT? AFTER ALL YOU’VE DONE?’ shouted my mother. ‘AND YOU’RE HORSE-BONDED! THEY SHOULD LISTEN TO WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY!’
‘I am young and inexperienced in most ways though,’ I said. ‘For someone to open up to knowing something that their life experience tells them is impossible, they have to completely trust the person who is helping them. I’m telling you from personal experience; I only knew that I could sing my broken arm back to health because I had absolute, total trust in Infinity when she told me I could. I don’t always inspire enough trust from people to be able to help them, but Jack does. Vickery’s learning quickly from him and I’m learning from them both.’
‘I trust you completely Am,’ said Katonia, ‘and I’d like you, please, to help me to open up to know I can multiskill.’
‘And me,’ said Con.
‘Me too,’ said my father. ‘I’m curious.’
One by one, each of my family asked for help to be able to multiskill, even my mother, who had shown no aptitude for any of the Skills at testing and so had trained as a Baker.
‘I’m going to need to enlist Jack’s help, to deal with all of you,’ I said and grinned inwardly.
‘It will be good to meet the young man,’ said my mother. ‘He and Vickery were whisked off so soon after your homecoming, I barely even got a look at him. And talking of young men, Amarilla, it hasn’t escaped my notice that you mentioned a good number of them in your letters. Is there anyone in particular we should be aware of?’
Instantly, I felt heat rising in my cheeks. ‘Ummm, no, not really.’
‘I think we can take that as a yes,’ said Robbie. ‘Come on Am, spill, who is he? And where is he? Oh, is he here? No, Marvel’s too old, Jack’s too intense and Aleks is too... now what is Aleks? Too unsure of himself, I would say?’
My brother’s perceptiveness surprised me even as my embarrassment prickled its way right down to my toes.
Am? Justin’s concern changed to amusement as he became Aware of what had caused my discomfort.
Well I’m glad you think it’s funny, what do I tell them? I thought to him.
‘Don’t mutter Amarilla, tell us who he is out loud so we can hear you,’ said my mother.
I hadn’t thought it possible for my face to go any redder, but it turned out that it was.
Tell them that there’s nothing to tell. We’re just frien
ds who can share minds because of what we’ve achieved with our horses, came Justin’s reply. He knew I felt the untruth of his words, but he was adamant that that was how our relationship would remain, at least for now.
‘Bloody man,’ I said to myself.
Katonia, sitting next to me, came to my rescue. ‘Amarilla is close friends with Justin, which is only natural seeing as they’re both Aware and can share minds in the same way that the Horse-Bonded do with their horses – remember, she told us about that in one of her letters? Justin is at The Gathering, where he and Quinta are needed to teach,’ she said, and squeezed my hand under the table.
‘Close friends, eh? That explains totally why Amarilla has a face like a beetroot,’ said Robbie.
I sighed. ‘Yes, close friends.’
‘If you can share minds with him like you do with Infinity, can you speak to him right now? Even though he’s at The Gathering?’ Con asked.
I nodded. All of my family, except for Katonia, were staring at me and I felt their surprise, curiosity and discomfort.
My mother frowned. ‘Can Justin know everything you’re thinking, whenever he wants to?’
‘Yes, he can, but...’
‘Who is this Justin, exactly, and how old is he?’ There was an edge of hysteria to my mother’s voice and I could feel her emotions bubbling up, threatening to break through the layer of peace that she had enjoyed since the previous day.
‘Justin is someone who has looked out for me since the first day I met him,’ I said. ‘Yes, he can know anything he wants to about me and I can know the same about him, but the fact is, as soon as we became Aware, we both knew, as the horses have always known, that we are one with All That Is. We’re one with each other. He knew me before I was me, just as Infinity did, just as all of you did, actually. There’s nothing hidden between us and there’s nothing that needs to be. And in answer to your question, Mum, Justin is twenty-eight.’
All of my family, with the exception of Katonia, were looking at me as if they’d never seen me before and I felt their fear as strongly as I felt Katonia’s acceptance.
Do not attempt to alleviate their emotions. They will need to experience their full range in order to be ready for what is to come. Infinity’s counsel was as comforting as it was welcome.
Katonia got to her feet. ‘Come on Am, let’s clear away and get pudding so everyone can talk about you,’ she said, winking at me.
I gathered plates and cutlery and followed her to the sink. ‘Well that went well,’ I said.
‘At least you understand now why Justin has insisted that you and he stay friends for now? Can you imagine what would have happened if you’d told them that your first boyfriend is ten years older than you and can share your mind?’ my sister said.
As understanding dawned on my face, Katonia laughed. ‘Honestly, Am, you can be so dense sometimes. You and Justin may have reached a deeper understanding of reality than the rest of us, but you’re still people, living among people and Justin clearly understands that better than you do. The more I hear about him, the more I like him.’
Tell your sister I said thanks, and not just for the compliment.
I’d forgotten you were still there, Jus. Had you been more help, I’d likely have remembered, I told him.
I could almost hear Justin chuckling.
‘Remembered what? They’re all talking now so you can speak up,’ Katonia said.
‘Sorry, I was answering Justin. I always mutter when I talk to him, my brain can’t seem to get the hang of the fact that I don’t need to say the words out loud.’
‘He’s with you now?’
‘Yep, has been since I flushed like a tomato at the table. He wanted to know what was wrong, I asked him what I should say and he was no help whatsoever, in fact he thinks it’s funny. He said to say thanks to you, and not just for the compliment.’ I laughed at my sister’s shock.
‘Tell him he’s welcome. Oh wait, can he... hear me somehow?’
‘He knows what you’ve said when I process your words as thoughts, but only if his whole attention is with me at the time. Don’t worry, if you want to speak to me in private, it will be private.’
Katonia was thoughtful. ‘But he can know everything you know. Does he know what you know about me? About our agreement?’
‘If Justin wanted to sift through everything I know about everyone, then he could know everything about you. But he wouldn’t do that, Kat, even if he had the time, which he doesn’t. He’s living his own life and that takes up most of his attention. We might share minds for a while if we need to talk something over, and if I feel an emotion strongly enough, it might be enough to draw his attention to me, but we both respect the need that most people have – that we used to have – for privacy. There may be a time when I’ll need to tell him, though. Will that be okay? Some of it will be common knowledge soon, anyway.’
‘What? Which bit? Amarilla, tell me!’
‘Believe me when I tell you that you wouldn’t thank me for stopping you finding out for yourself and also believe me that after having been bonded to Infinity for nearly two years I know exactly how annoying you’ll be finding me right now!’ I said.
‘Change annoying to insufferable and you’re nearly there,’ Katonia retorted. ‘We’d best get the rest of the plates cleared and see if anyone’s remembered that they haven’t eaten pudding yet. You always did know how to make family dinners memorable!’
I thought back to the dinner when I’d announced that I was going to become one of the Horse-Bonded and I grinned as I nodded.
Five
Serendipity
Rowena laughed so hard that she had to lean on the pommel of Oak’s saddle to steady herself. I looked across at Marvel to see that he also found my tale amusing.
‘I can just picture their faces,’ Rowena gasped. ‘Blimey Am, “he knew me before I was me,” “he and I are one”, could you not have thought of any way to maybe tone it down a bit? Honestly, when I first met you, and also, incidentally, the last time your family saw you, you were a mild, innocent people-pleaser with a bit of a stubborn streak. Now, you say it like it is, even when no one really understands what “it” is, and then you wonder why people look at you as if you just told them that their pants are on fire!’
‘Well what else could I say? Justin was no help whatsoever, Infinity couldn’t care less about stuff like this and Mum was building up steam for a meltdown.’
‘Oh, I don’t know, maybe something like, “we’ve shared a lot of the same experiences and have become good friends as a result, there’s a chance I may have a bit of a crush on him” – enough truth to be believable, but none of the flaky stuff that freaks people out?’ Rowena said, wiping her eyes.
‘I guess that would have been easier,’ I admitted, allowing myself to giggle.
‘You guess? Seriously?’ Rowena said, her giggles echoing mine.
When I had a hold over myself, I asked, ‘what are the others up to this morning?’
‘We told Jack and Vic yesterday that we three were going for a ride this morning and they seemed to think that they’d be too busy helping everyone who wants to multiskill, to come with us,’ said Marvel.
‘What about Aleks and Sonja, didn’t they want to come?’ I said.
‘They weren’t invited,’ said Rowena. ‘I needed a break from Aleks, so Sonja insisted that he and Nexus ride out early with her and Bright.’
‘What’s going on?’ I said.
‘Oh, just Aleks being Aleks. His latest moan is that in the two days we’ve been in Rockwood, he hasn’t seen hide nor hair of you and he’s worried that his progress with Nexus is suffering as a result of interruptions to their training. Sonja knows what you were working on with him and I think she was going to try to help him a bit while they’re out,’ Rowena replied.
‘Anyone fancy a bit of a blast? Broad’s got a bit of energy to burn,’ said Marvel.
Infinity immediately launched into a powerful, ground-covering canter. �
�You can take that as a yes. See you back at Rockwood,’ I shouted over my shoulder.
‘No way, we’re right behind you,’ shouted Rowena and I heard Oak’s and Broad’s big hooves thundering up behind Infinity across the open pastureland.
Infinity’s decision was made as soon as the stallions increased their pace. I felt the strength in her hindquarters as she pushed herself up to a gallop, and I whooped for the joy we shared as we tore for home.
The warm spring breeze felt like a buffeting wind as we ripped our way through it and my eyes watered so much that Rockwood was a blur as it loomed up in front of us. Infinity slowed to a canter and then to an elegant trot as her hooves touched cobblestones, her white neck arched like that of a swan, her powerful hindquarters fully engaged underneath herself, carrying her weight and mine effortlessly, and her silvery-white tail held out behind her. She flicked a black and white ear backwards as Oak whinnied from some distance behind. I grinned.
Deny it as much as you like, Fin, but you do love to win a race, I told her.
I merely demonstrated the difference between the power my body can express and the power to which Broad and Oak have access whilst their bodies are organised in the way that they are.
Oh, I see, so you were providing a demonstration to Marvel and Rowena of what their horses will be able to do once they’ve helped them to balance as well as you can – an incentive, if you will?
It was unlikely that Infinity would have deigned to answer even if we’d been on our own, but with so many people gasping at her, adoringly, as she passed, there was no chance whatsoever. I waved at some of them as we slowed and turned to watch our friends catch up with us.
‘Isn’t that Serene, standing outside Holly’s house?’ said Marvel as Broad slowed to a halt next to us.
I turned back to see a small crowd of people taking it in turns to offer their hands for a slim, grey horse to sniff. As we neared them, I could see that it was indeed Serene. Holly, Serene’s tall, slender Bond-Partner, was standing on the step of her family’s cottage, embracing her mother.