by K E Osborn
Instantly, I stand which makes Nessie’s hand drop away from my leg. I take one large gulp of my beer and turn to her. “Thanks, Ness.” She dips her chin and returns to the other side of the bar.
Quickly turning on my heels, I walk toward Fin, who whirls around trying to make it look like she wasn’t watching me. Once I reach her, I lift my hand to touch her arm.
She spins to face me. “Oh, hi!”
My lips turn up in the corner at her terrible acting. “Nessie was giving me a pep talk.”
Finley rolls her eyes. “Yeah, I bet she was.”
I grab her arm again, forcing her to look at me. “Fin, I mean it. Nothing was going on.”
She yanks her arm free from my hold. “Seriously? You think you talking to a club girl is going to upset me? You can talk to whoever you want, Texas. I’m not your keeper.”
“She’s a friend, Fin.”
She scrunches up her face. “That’s all I am too. So I don’t know what this fuss is all about?”
Ouch!
Taking a step back to put some space between us, I nod once and turn to walk away from her.
“Texas,” she calls out with obvious regret in her tone.
But I can’t stop.
I’m doubting my place here at the club because of her.
Finley doesn’t want to be with a biker. Right, I get it.
But then again, maybe it’s just that she doesn’t want to be with me.
FINLEY
Texas storms away from me, and honestly, can I blame him? We both know there’s something between us, something brewing, and I all but shoved it in his face, just because I was jealous some club girl was innocently touching him.
I’m a complete and utter fucking mess.
All he’s ever tried to do is help me, be there for me, and all I’ve ever done is to push him away.
If I am being honest right now, I don’t deserve him.
Texas is too good for me—which is kind of hilarious considering he’s a 1% biker.
There I go, putting him down again.
The problem is he’s more kindhearted than I will ever be. I’m ruthless, calculating, conniving, overbearing, and deceitful because I’m an attorney, so I have to be all these things. And the issue with this is sometimes I just don’t know when to be human.
When to be a woman.
When to act feminine.
When to be normal.
When to be kind.
Texas deserves someone who can be kind, and I’m not sure I am capable of that. So, I make my way over to the bar, to Nessie who he was chatting with, even though the thought of her touching him makes me want to rip her hair out. I sit on the stool Texas was on and lay my arms upon the countertop. Nessie smiles at me kindly, then moves to the back of the bar grabbing a vodka bottle, a glass and starts pouring. “Looks like you need one of these.”
“You’re really good at your job.”
Nessie chuckles. “Been working the bar here for years. I can read when someone is hurting and in need of a liquid hug.”
“Do you have a biker-waitress confidentiality clause?”
Nessie rolls her shoulders. “Mmm… kinda, depends on what they tell me.” She slides me over the vodka.
“Texas! Did he say anything about me?”
Nessie weakly smiles. “Not directly.”
Furrowing my brows, I sit further forward. “So indirectly, what did he say?”
“If I was getting the gist right, that he thinks he’s not good enough for you, and it’s making him doubt his place here at the club… I think, he believes if he wasn’t a brother, you would take him more seriously. Take your relationship more seriously, whatever that may be.”
Heaviness weighs down on me. “Oh, God. I don’t think that… wait… maybe I do… oh fuck, I don’t know. All I know is he’s a biker, I’m an attorney, how the fuck can that work?”
Nessie leans forward so she’s right up in my space. “Get over it.”
I jerk my head back in shock. “What?”
“Get. Over. It,” she states categorically. “Seriously, girl, you like him, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Then, honey, if I have learned anything at this club, it’s that life is terribly short. If you like Texas, find a way to make it work. We know the attorney-biker thing works because you employ an Old Lady. You can’t tell me you haven’t at least let that thought cross your mind?”
I sit in silence because she is right.
Jovie is Kevlar’s Old Lady.
Here, she’s known as Sunshine, but at work, everyone knows her as Jovie.
It works.
And it works well.
She lives at the clubhouse, but her ‘residential’ address is at the apartments across the street that the club owns.
She has everything figured out in fine detail.
It’s been done.
It’s working.
Jovie and Kevlar are living proof that an attorney and a biker can have a happy relationship. Hell, they have kids. I don’t honestly know what’s holding me back. Maybe it’s the idea that once I step into a relationship with a biker, it puts me into a certain category.
If I do get found out, it could ruin me.
It would ruin my career.
The risk is huge.
Massive.
Working for criminals is one thing.
Dating one—that’s something different altogether.
“There’s so much on the line,” I mumble under my breath.
Nessie reaches out touching my arm. “Honey, every day you spend being indecisive is one day less of your life you’ll never get back. One day less where you could be having a beautiful life with Texas. He’s a great guy. If only you’d give him the chance he deserves to prove to you that he’s worth the risk.”
Is he worth the risk?
“Thanks, Nessie. I need to think on this.” I throw back the contents of the glass, the vodka burning all the way down my throat.
Neon walks up to my side. “You want the good news or the bad news?”
“Good news first. Hit me!”
He slides out the stool beside me with a wide grin and takes a seat. “I’m a fucking genius, and I got all your money back.”
“You did?” I sit up taller letting out a small shriek.
Neon bobs his head as I rush forward taking him into a tight embrace. He pulls me back making me sit back down on the stool. “Remember, I also said there was some bad news.”
Taking in a deep breath, I say, “Okay, go.”
“I can’t trace who took it. We can’t be sure it was Maxen even though it probably was. But I have beefed up your security so it shouldn’t happen again.”
“Neon, I think I love you a little bit.”
He scoffs out a laugh. “It took me a little while to find the final resting place of the money, but once I did, it was easy enough to wire it all back. Then I closed down that account and sent Malware to their servers to fuck them over.”
“Did anyone ever tell you you’re amazing?”
He grins. “Shiver does all the time.” He winks, and I roll my eyes at his lame sex joke.
“How is she anyway? Gone back to the track?”
“Yeah. It’s gonna take a bit of getting used to, but we can handle it. She’s gone for two weeks at a time then back for two.”
Neon’s Old Lady races drag bikes. She’s a total badass!
“If anyone can handle something like that, it’s you two after what you’ve both been through.”
A somber expression crosses his face. “Yeah, well my sister running off with Wraith’s brother wasn’t really something I was expecting to have to deal with.”
Neon’s sister, Anna, is particularly unhinged. The club tried to get her into a mental facility to get help with her unstable mood patterns, and her attachment issues to Neon, but it didn’t work, and she found an ally in Wraith’s brother, Damir, the leader of the Triglav Clan. He’s been out for revenge on Wraith ever sinc
e he killed their mother.
That’s a whole story in and of itself.
“I don’t think anyone was expecting that…” I take a breath. “Anna will come to her senses one day. You’ll see.”
Neon fakes a smile, then glances around the room. “Where’s your entourage?”
My stomach twists. “You mean Texas?” Neon nods. “I think he needed a break from babysitting duties.”
“You guys have a fight?”
“I don’t even know if I could call it that.”
“We’ve all been there… stick it out. He adores you… everyone can see it.” I grimace at his words, and Neon jerks his head back. “You don’t feel the same?”
“I… I don’t know how I feel.”
Neon pulls his lips into a tight thin line. “Right… then let him down gently. He deserves that much at least. Glad I could help fix your accounts, Fin.” He grips my shoulder, then stands and walks away leaving me no clearer on my thoughts toward Texas than I was before I sat down.
Now I feel fucking awkward, and I have to go back home with Texas with shit strained between us.
Fox walks in carrying a huge tray of something that smells delicious, and it instantly gains my attention. I turn toward him as he places the tray on one of the tables while Lexi and Bonnie move in beside him to help with plating out the portions of the brisket and mac and cheese lunch.
Walking over, I take a seat on my own. Cherry steps over handing me a plate. I take it with a smile as she winks at me, then takes off again. I pick up my fork and start when someone slides in beside me. I turn to see Phantom, and for some reason, I instantly relax.
He bumps into my side making me smile. “Why are you sitting on your own?”
Exhaling, I shrug. “Think I have made a big enough fool of myself today, Phantom.”
He chuckles. “I know all about that shit, so join the club.” He lifts his soda into the air as if he’s calling cheers to himself.
“What have you done to make a fool out of yourself?” I ask.
His eyes shift to Prinie and Wraith who are laughing on the other side of the room, and then it hits me. “Ahh… still raw, hey?”
He cocks his head to the side. “Oh, you were in the den when the announcement was made.”
I raise my brow. “Announcement?”
“She’s pregnant again.”
“Oh, I’m sorry.”
“I’m not… it cements that they are a true family and I gotta let that shit go completely.”
I wrap my arm around his shoulders. “You’ll find your woman. Someone who wants you back.”
“Ouch, low blow!” He laughs.
“You’re still young, Phantom, don’t get to my age and be single like me. Everything becomes a stressor, and you overanalyze every single damn detail. It does you no good. Get out there while you’re young and just go for it.”
“You’re not even old, Fin.”
“I’m thirty-two. That’s getting old when you’re single.”
“Bullshit, age is only a number—” He stops, something registering in his eyes. “Wait! You’re older than Texas?”
I raise my brow.
I didn’t know that.
“Am I?”
Phantom smiles. “Yeah, he’s twenty-nine. The dirty dog.”
“Phantom, there’s nothing going on.”
“Tell that to your drunk self.”
Widening my eyes, I gasp. “What the hell does that mean?”
He chuckles. “Nah, nothing. But you might have told us both you thought we are hot.”
My face falls as I sink my head into my hands. “Oh my God. Really? What else did I say?”
“Nothing much, you were fucking wasted. It was fun as hell getting you up those stairs, though.”
I peek up at him, my cheeks flushing bright red. “Never speak of this to anyone.”
He chuckles. “You got it, boss.”
Phantom might have been annoying me this morning, but he’s the only one making an effort with me right now, and I appreciate it more than he will ever know. “Phantom?”
“Yeah?”
“You like being in the club?”
A slow grin forms on his face. “It’s all about the brotherhood for me, having people at my back.”
“Protection?”
“That’s part of it. But also feeling like you belong somewhere… even when sometimes you don’t. There are other people here who make the effort to make sure you’re needed and wanted.”
“So even though you lost your chance with Prinie, and it hurts to see her move on with Wraith and start her family, you still want to be here.”
“Yeah, even though it hurts, the brotherhood outweighs all that shit. Because these assholes make it all worthwhile. They’re not just the guys I ride next to… they’re my family. And not one of us can give that up.”
Nessie’s words ring through my mind…
“…he thinks he’s not good enough for you, and it’s making him doubt his place here at the club… I think, he believes if he wasn’t a brother, you would take him more seriously.”
After what Phantom has just said, Nessie’s words hit me even harder. If Texas is thinking about his place here at the club, about his position here at Defiance because of me, what does that say about me? If the guys in this club think of each other like Phantom says they do, then I can’t let Texas walk away from Defiance to make me feel better about our situation, that just isn’t right. Texas doesn’t have a family back in Jersey, but he’s made one here in Houston. I can’t take that away from him because I’m scared that it might affect my business.
That leaves me with two options.
Stop this flirtation with Texas now, so neither of us get hurt any more than we already are.
Or, jump in headfirst, and hope my head doesn’t hit the bottom.
TEXAS
After spending the afternoon with the club, Finley made it clear she needed to get back so she could do some work from her home office. Shit feels strained between us as we walk from her car to her front door.
Phantom moves forward to do the usual safety checks inside, leaving me alone with Fin for the first time in hours. I glance at her, and she hesitates to return a look.
“Fin, are you gonna spend the rest of the night pissed at me because of Nessie?”
She slumps her body, turning toward me. “I’m not pissed at you, Texas.”
“Well, it sure feels like it. You say we’re friends, but I’m not even getting that from you right now.”
Her eyes blink a few times, her hard exterior appears like it’s cracking as she takes a step forward. “Texas, I—”
“The house is clear. We’re good to go,” Phantom calls out, then sticks his head out the door like a meerkat. If I wasn’t in such a shit of a mood, I would find him amusing.
His eyes widen taking in the distance between Fin and me, and as quickly as his head popped out, he retreats back inside. I gesture for the entry, Finley walks inside ahead of me, and I close the door behind us. We keep going into the kitchen, and I can’t help my eyes shifting down to her toned and curvy ass as she makes her way to the bench.
“Man, I love Fox’s barbecue. I’m glad we were at the club for lunch today,” Phantom breaks the awkward silence between us all.
Finley walks over to the Keurig, turning it on to make herself a coffee. “I don’t know how you guys are all so damn fit, with all that shit you eat.”
“You pervert, Finley. You checking us all out.” Phantom smirks.
“It’s hard not to when you guys are strutting your stuff around that clubhouse all the time.”
“Like beefcake over there, he’s always working out.” Phantom points to me. “Tension release, I say.”
I pick up an apple from the fruit basket on the counter and hurl it at him. He laughs catching it, then takes a bite. “You’re just jealous ‘cause you’re bringing water balloons to this gun fight,” I jab right back.
Finley bursts out la
ughing. “Oh geez.”
Phantom smirks. “Hey, I’m working hard on these babies.” Phantom bulges his bicep, kissing it for good measure. He has muscles, but compared to me, the kid’s half my size, and he knows it too.
“You’re gonna need to keep on working them if you wanna look like a real biker.”
Phantom snorts. “Yeah, yeah… anyways, I’m gonna take the first shift. I’ll be upstairs when you’re ready to take over.”
I raise my chin at him in recognition as he takes off for the stairs, leaving me alone with Fin.
She moves over to the refrigerator, spots something on it, and gasps. “Fuck! I completely forgot with all the shit that’s been going on.”
My eyes meet hers as she turns to face me, a determined look on her face. “What?”
“The Annual Attorney’s Gala. It’s on tonight… I have to go.”
A loud, obnoxious snort escapes my lips. “No… you don’t. Forget it!”
She folds her arms over her chest, glaring at me with a look I’m sure most people shit their pants witnessing. “This isn’t something I can just forget about, Texas. It’s the biggest event of the year. I’m practically hosting it. I have huge stakes in this event, and it has taken all year to get it to this point. Me not going is a snub to not only my clients but to all the other associates and law firms who are attending… I. Have. To. Go.”
I continue to laugh, shaking my head. “Maxen just tried to drain your bank accounts, and you’re still willing to risk exposure to him? Are you fucking crazy?”
She turns her lip up at me in a snarl. “Don’t be an asshole, Texas. I’m doing my job and keeping my business afloat.”
I step forward into her space. “And I’m trying to keep you alive! See the damn difference here?”
Her hard eyes fall from mine, and she huffs. “I’m going. You can either come with me, or you can bitch and moan about it. But I am going. I’d like it if you could come to protect me.”
In my anger, I slam my fist onto the countertop. She doesn’t flinch as I spin on my heels to make my way outside. “Fucking, stubborn, stupid woman!” I grumble under my breath.
“And you’ll need to wear a tux!” she calls out.