by K E Osborn
I tune in halfway through their conversation.
“No shit, she would tear you a new asshole. Goddamn, that bitch scares even me,” Chains mocks.
“Scares you? Her? Ha! I could take her on. Put me in the ring with her… I’ll have that well-maintained hair all messed up in no time,” Chills jokes.
Everyone laughs as Chains shakes his head. “You’re so fucking hot.”
Chills shrugs. “When I’m not covered in Kobe’s spit up or elbow-deep in someone’s chest on an operating table, yeah, sure.”
A low growl reverbs from Chains’ chest. “I love it when you talk dirty.”
We all raise our brows, and Chills rolls her eyes. “You’re so fucking strange, but I love you.” She leans in kissing his bearded lips, and Fin slides her hand under the table onto my leg.
Glancing at her, she’s smiling at me. It gives me a warm feeling and that little bit of strength I need to say what I have to. “Guys, I have something to say.”
Chills turns to face me, raising her brow. I give her a subtle nod, and she smiles, letting me know she’s here for backup if I need her.
“You look like you’re about to pass a gallstone, Texas. Spit it out, brother. Whatever it is, it can’t be that fucking bad,” Zero states.
Fin tightens her grip on my thigh before I start, “A couple weeks ago, Chills and I had a chat about some shit I’ve been dealing with.”
Everyone narrows their eyes, but I continue, “Turns out I have a disorder, one that I’m gonna need medical help with.”
“The fuck, man? Why have you been sitting on this for two weeks and not telling us?” Zero asks.
Chills dips her head at me to go on, giving me the encouragement I need. “Because it’s a mental disorder… I need psychotherapy and maybe antidepressants to get me through it.”
Everyone turns to Chills.
“It’s called Depersonalization/Derealization Disorder, and it stems from severe childhood trauma. He’s been living with this for his entire adult life. Feeling like he doesn’t fit in, like he says the wrong shit all the time, like he can’t truly feel his emotions.”
No one says anything.
The fog takes over as the haze envelops me. It’s like I step back out of my body, and now I am looking in from the outside.
It’s a coping mechanism.
One I have mastered over the years.
One that helps me live my life without the fear of judgment.
I know that now, and I can’t help it.
Fin shifts forward. “Texas is concerned you’re all going to think he’s crazy. His exact words were, you’ll call him a pussy.”
“Fin!” I blurt out.
Zero glares. “What the fuck! Texas, you’re our brother. Family. Goddamn, you always seemed so cock-sure of yourself. I’m… fucking pissed for not picking up you were going through something all this time.”
“Yeah, agreed! I think nothing other than, how can we all help? What the fuck can we do? You’re no different than you were five fucking minutes ago,” Neon states.
Chains sits forward placing his hands on the table in front of him, almost a calculated move. “Brother, take it from someone who has had his fair share of demons, get the damn help, do the work. I couldn’t have the life I live without the shit I had to go through to get to where I am now…” He looks at Chills. “Yeah, our childhoods can be fucking shit, I know that only too well, but you can get past it. You have an entire brotherhood at your back who is gonna help you, not to mention a woman who’s obviously here to support you. You got everything going for you.”
Chills takes Chains’ hand in hers. There’s obviously a lot about their backstory I don’t know, and maybe one day I can speak to them about it, but for now, it’s fucking incredible to have my brothers backing me. It’s not what I expected, but maybe I should have given them more credit.
Our club has always been about family and brotherhood, and I totally underestimated them.
I am the protector of the club, the man everyone looks to. Well, right now, perhaps I need some of that protection returned.
“I didn’t expect it to go this way, but I appreciate you. All of you.”
“We’re here, brother. Whatever you need,” Zero tells me.
Nodding my head, I exhale loudly. “I do need one thing, more than anything else.”
“What? Name it?”
“A progress report on Maxen. Where are we at?”
Neon blinks a few times before answering, “I’m trying. I’ve been searching down every fucking avenue for this guy, but something just isn’t adding up. His contacts, the loose ends, they seem unending. I’m concerned if we attack, if we take him out… the blowback would be too big right now. The unknown means we could be walking into something much bigger than we can handle on our own. We might need help with this. So, the short answer is, we need to wait. I have to narrow shit down, try and figure out who and what all these loose ends are and how dangerous they might really be.”
Fin shifts uncomfortably in her seat. “So, what you are saying is we have no idea how long I could be here for?”
I run my hand over my bald scalp. “Neon, c’mon, brother. Finley has a business to run.”
“I don’t know what to tell you… if you want to keep safe from Maxen Miller, you have to stay under our protection until I can figure how deep this goes.”
I turn to Fin. “Looks like you’ll be here for a while longer.”
“It’s fine.” She barely smiles. “Being here isn’t so bad.”
“While we’re talking about enemies, Neon. Have you had any contact from Anna since she fled with that asshole, Damir?” Zero grunts.
Neon’s face falls. “None. I’ve tried her cell, it’s disconnected. I asked our parents to tell me if she shows up at the house, but she hasn’t contacted them. She’s a ghost. She’s in the wind. Who knows the ways in which Damir has twisted her mind?”
Zero grips his shoulder. “Neon, there was a time when I loved Anna…” Cherry’s eyes fall to the floor as he continues, “… and I know you do too. But you know the order has been given… if she comes back here, there won’t be any talking. There is no coming back for her. She betrayed the club. Me. You.”
Neon clears his throat. “Yeah, brother, I know. That don’t make it any less hard, though.”
“If it makes you feel better, it fucking hurts us all. Even though she annoyed the crap out of me in the end, there was a time there when I was going to marry her. She meant something to me, Neon. Don’t forget that... I don’t make this order lightly.”
Neon stands while taking in a deep breath. “I’ll keep looking into Maxen.”
“Thanks, Neon,” Fin replies softly as he walks away from the table toward his den.
This shit got fucking serious.
Everyone is quiet when Cherry takes Zero’s hand on top of the table. “You’re doing the right thing. Don’t question yourself. It’s for the good of the club.”
Zero rubs the back of his neck then abruptly stands, walking off toward the chapel without saying another word.
Cherry grimaces. “Sorry, guys, this is a difficult topic for them. They butt heads on it. It brings them both down.”
“Unfortunately, there’s no fix for this one. Anna made her bed when she left with Damir. We all know club policy. You betray the club, that shit puts a target on your back. In some way, Anna knew that too. It’s why she won’t contact Neon or their parents. She knows she’s on borrowed time,” Chills states.
Cherry nods. “Exactly, we all know it, but I can’t imagine what Neon is feeling. He and Anna were so fucking close. Knowing his sister is going to die at the hands of the one place he loves more than anything… it’s no wonder it is a sore point whenever it gets brought up.”
“Why does she have to die? Can’t she just leave and never come back?” Fin asks.
We all look at her like she’s lost her damn mind.
“She betrayed us, that’s an MC cardinal sin.
You can’t get away with that. It’s who we are. It’s the ultimate law,” I tell her.
Chills reaches out grabbing Fin’s hand. “Coming into the club as an outsider, especially with an important job like a doctor or say, for instance, an attorney…” she pauses before continuing, “… you have to decide whether or not you’re in. Because if you’re in, then, Fin, you gotta be all in. Take the amazingly good with the very fucking bad. This club, all of the Defiance clubs, can bring you so much joy if you let them. Yeah, there’ll be times when shit is hard. There’ll be wars, battles, bloodshed, and tears… but if you can handle all that, if you can handle the brutality for the man you adore, then honey, it’s incredibly worth it. The risk, the juggling act with your job, the late nights, the constant nagging feeling in your gut that you’ll be found out at any time, it’s… All. Worth. It. Because your man, and this club, this environment and brotherhood, this family, they are worth every single second of doubt you have.”
Chains leans in pressing his lips to Chills’ temple.
Fin turns to me, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. “It’s worth it. You’re worth it, Texas.”
I lean forward, my hand in her hair, pulling her to me. My lips slam against hers, and I kiss her, not caring about who’s watching. My tongue dives into her mouth, and I claim her desperately as the people around us all chuckle.
I hear them standing, but I continue to kiss Finley like I mean it. She’s just told me that this is it. She’s choosing me, no matter the consequences.
And fuck if it doesn’t feel good.
“I’ll just leave this here for when you come up for air.” Chills slides something across the table.
The three of them get up and leave while I ignore them, continuing to kiss Fin as a few cheers and hollers echo through the room. Fin giggles against my lips as my cock begins to harden. I swear if Fin was anyone else, I would drop her down on this table and fuck her right here in front of everyone. But she deserves so much more than that. I grab her hand, pulling away from her breathlessly. Her eyes are hooded with lust as I pull her to a stand.
“We gotta go upstairs, right… fucking… now.”
She giggles, waggling her brows, as my brothers cat call, but I ignore them. Quickly, I glance down at the table to find a business card. I pick it up, then dash with Finley toward the stairs.
“Go get her, big man!” Trax calls out, and I flip him the bird.
With quick steps, we rush up the stairs toward her bedroom. She opens the door, races in and starts pulling at her dress. I throw the business card on the table, the words ‘clinical psychologist’ stare back at me, and for some reason it fills me with hope. A slow smile crosses my face as I turn back to Finley who’s taking off her bra and throwing it to one side.
I shrug out of my cut, placing it on top of the business card.
Oh yeah, I’m feeling incredible already.
TEXAS
Three Weeks Later
Halloween
Pulling up my bike, I kick out the stand as my brothers all stop alongside. Finley unwraps her arms, then she slides off, and I smirk at her sexy-as-fucking-sin Batwoman costume. Shaking my head, I take in everything around me. The two clubs, Chicago and us, all decided the brothers would go as Zombies this year. We’re all fucking epic if you ask me, our gray faces with blood and gore hanging off, give us the look we were going for. We’re not wearing our cuts as a mark of respect to the event organizers.
The women, however, are an array of characters. Prinie, for instance, with her pregnant belly, is wearing a white T-shirt that has stitching on it making her stomach look like a giant baseball. Teamed with an Astros baseball cap, jeans, and she’s even swinging a freaking baseball bat around.
Cherry is dressed as Little Red Riding Hood, the sexy version, of course. Chills came as a sexy zombie doctor, and Shiver is here too as a female version of The Mad Hatter. Sunshine dressed as Elsa, and Sadie came as Ana with Lucas as Olaf. Even I have to admit the three of them are pretty fucking cute. Just a shame Kevlar didn’t come as Sven or Kristoff. Would have made the look complete.
“This is unreal,” Fin murmurs, her eyes glancing around at all the stalls.
A genuine smile lights my face. “Yeah, we do this every year. The Halloween Fundraiser for the TCH Foundation. Especially since Chills started working there, we like to help out where we can.”
“That’s the Children’s Hospital, right?”
“Yeah. We come along, help with the fundraising, offer rides to the kids, and some parents who wish they could be bikers.” She laughs. “And we have a hell of a good time doing it.”
“Well, I’m glad to be out and about.”
I tilt my head. “Don’t think for a second you have any freedom here tonight. You’re gonna have people on you the entire time. They will be stuck to you like glue.”
She smiles. “I know.”
A loud whistle echoes through the air, and we turn to Zero standing on a box above us all. “Tonight, we’re here for the kids. Chicago is helping us out this year, so we can give twice the number of rides. In turn, we should be able to raise double the money for the hospital. I won’t take anything less for these guys. You all understand me?”
“Yeah, Pres,” we all call out.
“Now, let’s raise some cash!”
We all cheer as I wrap my arm around my Batwoman, and we head toward the ticketing booth. Kids and their parents race around the fairgrounds as the smell of corn dogs and popcorn filter through the air. Carved pumpkins light up the paths as haystacks make for great places to position the kids to take photos next to the characters here tonight.
Witches, Zombies, and ghouls roam the fair, while Fin and I take the tickets for the kids to go on rides with my brothers. The roar of Harleys sing through the glorious night sky as laugher resonates through the air.
Everyone is having fun.
Fox attached his side car to take those kids who aren’t quite well enough to ride on the back of a bike, and it’s so good to see those kids’ faces light up.
I sit back, my hand on Fin’s leathered up knee. “You know, I always used to come to these things and be bored. This year, though, I’m enjoying myself.”
Finley smiles wide, lifting her little Batwoman mask. “Oh really, is that because of the amazing company?”
I lean in waggling my brows. “Quite possibly.”
Suddenly, a gunshot rings through the air, forcing me break apart from Fin. I glance around as another rings out. People start screaming and running as if their lives depend on it. I stand, drawing out my weapon, as I see brothers running toward the entry of the fair as everyone tries to exit. That’s when I notice a crowd of men pushing their way through.
Shit.
“Fin, I need you to get under the table and stay there.”
Her eyes widen as she reaches out grabbing my arm. “No, Texas, stay here with me.”
Hesitating, I look into her terrified eyes, when an all-out gun fight breaks loose. Spinning toward the chaos, there are people screaming. My arms reach out, and I grab Fin, forcefully pushing her under the table. She’s shaking as I lean in planting a kiss on her lips. “It’s okay. You’re okay.”
“It’s Maxen, he’s here for me!” she blurts out.
I’m torn, the gunshots are getting closer. I need to head out there, help my brothers, but I want to stay here to protect Fin, especially if this is Maxen.
Suddenly, the tablecloth flies up and Sunshine slides under with Sadie, Lucas, Cherry, and Chills. Cherry pulls out a gun from inside her cloak and cracks her neck to the side. “I got this, Texas. Go!”
Fin’s eyes are desperate, but I have to do this. I am the protector of the club—the Sergeant-At-Arms—so I must defend my brothers. “I’ll be back.”
Fin nods, grabbing my head. “You better come back, or I’ll personally kill you.”
I chuckle, leaning in and plant a quick kiss on her lips. Then, I duck out from under the table, instantly getting sideswipe
d by a bullet across my bicep. I grip my arm as I hiss through the pain. I glance down, my arm is bleeding, but I shake it off as I cock my gun and take off.
Everywhere I look, Chicago and Houston Defiance are fighting off an attack. I can’t tell from who yet, but my money is on Maxen’s men. As I approach, it’s easy to see who I need to aim for. They stand out in their head-to-toe black attire instead of costumes that would have blended in.
Luckily, the people for the fundraiser seem to have all evacuated as I race forward, jumping over a haystack, and unloading a round at one of the intruders. It hits him square between the shoulder blades, and he lurches forward just before he was about to shoot Medic. He turns to face me, giving me a head bob, and I return the gesture and keep running.
Zero fights hand to hand with two intruders, one of the assholes trying everything to win one over on our president. I duck past him, grabbing a pumpkin carving knife off the table and slice behind one of the guy’s knees. He falls to the ground, unable to move, as I then slam the blade down into his back. Zero sucker punches the other one forcing him onto the table, taking out the cream pies as the table collapses in half with the asshole’s weight.
Zero bobs his head at me without saying anything, and we both take off in opposite directions. As I run past Sensei, he’s hurtling ninja stars that slam into the foreheads of the assholes who are attacking us. I smirk, grateful we have him on our side.
I rush past Koda, my eyes widening, but with a gun in each hand, he runs along the raised wall, taking out as many assholes as he can. They’re dropping like flies. Guy’s got balls or a damn death wish. He’s out in the open up there, so I rush in below him to cover.
An intruder raises their gun to take Koda out. I’m at that stage where I need to conserve ammo, so I pick up a Bloody Mary Syringe from the table, rush over to him from the side, squirting it in his face. He lets out a muffled wail as the acidic drink hits his eyes. He flails about as I slam my hand into his wrist forcing his gun to drop to the ground.
His red watery eyes snap open as I grin. “Boo!” I tease, then give the signal to Koda who doesn’t hesitate and fires a round straight into the fucker’s head. It explodes, sending blood and tomato juice fragments all over my zombie outfit and face. I glance up at Koda as he nods at me in thanks, then takes off into the fray.