That should have ended the flying drama, but Bill had managed to somehow sneak some of his special stashes onto the jet, despite Cody having basically shaken him from his toes prior to leaving. Bill dipped into enough of what he’d brought to leave him running up and down the center aisle of the plane, shouting instructions at the men as if they were all back in Nam and about to be ambushed.
It would have been sad if not for the fact the man then decided Armand was perfect to fill in for the part of the mechanical elephant that Bill was famed for having taken down. He’d charged the vampire, leaped on him, and then proceeded to scale him, which was comical for more than one reason. The fact Bill accomplished this while Armand was sitting was even more hysterical. In the height of it all, Bill knocked Armand from his chair, leaving the vampire on the floor and Bill sprawled out on top of him.
And that had been the first of three attempts Armand had made on Bill’s life on the jet alone.
Bill looked over at Gus, and his brows met. “How come I gotta warn Shark-boy about your helmet?”
Gus continued to rock, still appearing worked up over the mention of the jet.
Bill tossed his hands up and let out an irritated grunt. “How was I supposed to know it wasn’t that helmet? I ain’t you. I don’t just know. Hey, don’t take that tone with me. Yes, I’ll tell Sharkie about the Helmet-Head. Quit your bellyaching. Someone here needs a nap and this time, it ain’t me.”
Mac eyed Cody then he did the same to Mona. “Aussie, you do nae have a thing for dolls, do you? If so, I do nae want to be the one to break it to you, but she’s taken. You’ll need to be findin’ yer own head in a helmet. Mayhap it will get you through the long nights of wet dreams we’ve all heard ya havin’.”
“Asshole,” said Cody with a grin. He knew the back and forth was all in fun, to help lighten a tense situation. After all, they were in Savannah for reasons that were anything but sunshine and roses. Dwelling on as much at all times would get them nowhere, fast.
Mac laughed. “Aye. And thanks.”
Bill locked gazes with Cody. “We have to drop you off, Sharkie. You ain’t coming with us to the secret superhero base. You gotta meet a dead wheel at a park or something. He your dealer? Meeting at a park is amateur hour there, buddy. Meet under a bridge or on a rooftop. Take my word for it. I’m an expert.”
Cody looked to Mac for clarification.
Mac shrugged. “Do nae look at me. I do nae speak crazy.”
Everyone stared at him, begging to differ. If anyone in the vehicle spoke crazy fluently, it would be Mac.
Mac shrugged. “Okay, I do nae speak that brand of crazy.”
Armand stiffened—and then turned all the way around in his seat slowly. He stared past Cody to Gus. The way his eyes glossed over briefly said he was doing his vampire-mind-reading thing. “And you’re certain?”
Car did a dramatic show of rolling his eyes. “Oh guid. The dead douche’s antenna is up and he’s tuning in to Gus’s brainwave channel again. That’s nae the least bit troubling.”
“Has anyone ever told you that you are a waste of space?” asked Armand, centering his heated gaze on the man.
“Aye,” said Car, running a hand over his beard. “Twice today alone. Why?”
Armand sighed, his attention returning to Gus.
Gus kept rocking and said nothing that Cody could hear, but it was clear Gus was communicating with Armand telepathically.
Armand faced forward. “Carbrey, change of plans.”
“We’re nae going to the PSI office here, or as Bill likes to call it, the superhero secret base, are we?” asked Car, sounding tired. “Before you answer, I just need to know, is a crazy cult guy going to want to eat us on this new adventure? If you recall, that’s what happened the last time. Father Hippie wanted to have us as a snack or something. I’m all for finding the asshat who hurt Aussie, but I’d rather nae be anyone’s lunch. And I’ve a strict rule: only-be-a-potential-meal-for-a-bad-guy-once-a-week rule. I’ve met my quota this week already.”
Mac snorted. “Hey, I’d taste great.”
“Nah, you’d be less filling,” argued his brother.
“Gus did not say one way or another on that,” said Armand, cutting the twins off, his tone even. “But I will admit to having hope you are indeed devoured by a bad guy.”
Car grunted. “Well, can you ask him?”
“He can hear you,” said Armand.
Car glanced up at the rearview mirror, his expression saying he wasn’t so sure.
Gus rocked more in his seat and began to make a strange low moan. The noise was muffled because he had the snorkel in his mouth. The entire thing seemed less and less strange to Cody the more he got to know Bill and Gus.
Bill patted the man’s shoulder and Gus began to calm somewhat.
Nodding, Bill kept patting him. “I know it’s important. You ain’t gotta tell me twice. It’s these dipshit alpha males who need to be told more than once. When the government was handing out big willies, they apparently had cutbacks when it came to brains. That or they made all these alpha males the day before a holiday. You know, when them scientists were in a hurry to get the hell out of the lab and to their cookouts. Wanna bet the scientists are in a union?”
The comment earned the small man several dirty looks from the alpha men present. No surprise they’d taken exception to his statement.
As Cody thought more on Bill’s words, and the fact the doctors and scientists had indeed fucked up when making him, a small laugh came from him. “He’s not entirely wrong. It would explain the Outcasts.”
Mac rolled his eyes. “Dumbarse.”
Bill continued to pat his friend’s shoulder reassuringly even if the act seemed awkward, as if a toddler was trying to do the comforting. In a lot of ways, a toddler was doing it. “Calm down. It will be fine. I promise.”
Gus got louder.
Mac glanced over his shoulder at Bill. “What’s wrong with him now?”
“He thinks the Great-White-Pain-In-My-Ass is gonna ignore what he said and demand to be part of the search for info on that Helmet-Head dude,” said Bill, as if what he’d just said was perfectly rational and required no further explanation.
“Of course I’m going to insist on being a part of the search for Helmuth,” snapped Cody before taking a deep breath. They weren’t the source of his agitation. Helmuth was. It was wrong to take it out on them. “I’ve waited a long time to find him and stop him. I plan to be the one who kills him.”
Bill watched him. “He’s who hurt you most?”
Cody glanced away.
“Yes,” said Armand, answering for him. “Helmuth was either directly responsible for most of what Cody had to endure or he had a hand in it all. Regardless, he is the main reason Cody was forced to go through what he did.”
Gus rocked faster, making a louder grunting noise. He then began to slap his hand against his thigh. As his agitation grew, so did the volume of the sounds emanating from him.
Cody wanted to console the man in some small way, but he knew the best person for the job was already seated next to Gus. Bill, for all his faults and oddities, had a way with Gus that no one else seemed to possess.
As if on cue, Bill caught his friend’s hand and held it, slowing Gus’s rocking almost instantly. As if the small act of making contact provided the lifeline the man needed to find comfort.
Gus kept his gaze averted from everyone in the SUV, including Bill. Instead, he stared out the window, almost trancelike. While it appeared that he wasn’t really seeing anything, Cody suspected the man was soaking in everything. That he alone knew every single thing that was happening around them at all times.
Cody could still remember what it had been like to be locked away, denied human contact and interactions for so long that he often thought he’d go crazy alone with his thoughts. Then when he’d finally be taken back to a cell that had other prisoners nearby, he would feel as if all his senses were being overloaded all at once. That light
s were too bright. Sounds were too loud. Touch was downright unbearable. He didn’t want to think what that must be like to live with on a daily basis, never able to escape it.
And he strongly suspected that was what life was like for Gus.
Bill cleared his throat, still holding his friend’s hand, his gaze on Cody the entire time. In that second, Bill seemed completely sound and rational, making Cody wonder if deep under all the insane ramblings and impulsive behavior lurked a mentally stable individual.
One the government had damaged beyond repair.
“Gus says Helmet-Head is the only reason you weren’t killed when the bad dudes got the samples they wanted from you,” said Bill, his voice low while his words were spaced evenly, as if he was going out of his way to be as relaxed as possible. Maybe he was, since he’d only just gotten Gus to settle. “Says you’d have been terminated within minutes of them getting what they wanted in Costa Rica. Then they’d have cut you up in pieces and studied you. You’d have been sushi. That sushi bit was me adding my two cents. Gus didn’t say nothing about no sushi. He’s not a big fan of it. We like grilled cheese sandwiches and peanut butter and jelly. And cheeseburgers. You know, the staples. That reminds me, I’m hungry.”
“Aye, we’ll feed you soon,” said Mac with a nod. “I’ll nae let you starve.”
Cody focused on Gus, wanting desperately to understand how it was the man knew about Costa Rica and what had gone on there. Whatever it was that Gus could do, it was downright disconcerting at times.
This was one of those times.
Gus began to rock once more, his hand still in Bill’s.
Cody thought about what he’d just been told. About how Helmuth was the only reason he’d not been killed right after he’d been captured. “So, I should be grateful to him? Be forever thankful he’s the reason I was held as long as I was and put through everything they put me through because he kept me from being killed? I should let him live? Let him keep hurting others? You do realize I was taken seventeen years ago and have only been free just over five years now? Not sure I should be singing that asshole’s praises.”
Gus stopped rocking and fell silent.
Bill kept hold of his hand. “No. That ain’t what he’s saying at all, Sharkie. Don’t go gettin’ pissy with him or you’re gonna have me to deal with. Gus is just the messenger. Helmut-Head has gotta die, but right now, you gotta let your friends worry about finding him. You gotta be somewhere else.”
Cody drew in a long breath, his nostrils flaring as he fought to keep hold of a temper that he didn’t like seeing manifest. “Pretty sure I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be and that I do need to be there, alongside everyone else, hunting for the prick.”
“I do nae disagree with Aussie,” said Mac right before belching loudly. “He’s earned the right to hunt this bag of dicks. I’ll admit I’m looking forward to hunting the asshat myself. I’ve never seen a gargoyle before. The last year has opened my eyes to a lot of shit I dinnae think was real. Next, I’ll be forced to fight a spaghetti monster or the Easter Bunny.”
“Aye,” said Car from the driver’s seat. “Christ, brother, what did you eat? Yer burp smells like rotten eggs.”
Mac beamed with pride. “Because I had eggs for breakfast. Just be thankful the gas picked coming out the top and nae the bottom.”
Bill laughed but didn’t sound amused. “You don’t get it, do you? Gus ain’t saying Fin-for-brains can’t hunt for Helmet-Head. He’s saying Sharkie’s got somewhere else he’s gotta be. That if he don’t go, bad, bad things will happen. That someone else needs his help more than he needs his revenge right now.”
“I’ll bite,” said Mac with a cocky grin. “Where does Aussie need to be instead and who is this he needs to help?”
“I already told him. He’s gotta meet a dead wheel at a park,” said Bill, annoyance evident in his every word.
“Och, crazy talk and riddles are nae helpful,” said Mac. He looked at Cody. “He’s insane. And I’m saying this as a card-carryin’ member of the club.”
The edges of Bill’s mouth curved upward. “Thanks. And yeah, I’m crazy, but that don’t mean Sharkie there doesn’t gotta go to a park and see a dead wheel. He does it every week. That’s what Gus says. Says Sharkie always meets the dead wheel there.”
Armand exhaled loudly. “He’s speaking of Wheeler, Cody. You meet Wheeler once a week in the park whenever you’re both in Savannah, do you not?”
Cody stiffened as the pieces seemed to start to fall into place. “Yes. I do.”
“The vampire Outcast?” asked Mac. “One the li’l crazy man would see as dead?”
“Dead wheel,” said Cody in a hushed tone, finally following along. Confused as to why it was he’d need to be hanging with his buddy shooting the shit rather than hunting for an evil bastard, he stared back at Gus fully, which took some doing. “How is that going to keep bad things from happening? You’re not saying Wheeler is in Helmuth’s sights, are you? Is he the one in danger? The one who needs my help more than I need revenge?”
Worry for his friend rushed over him.
It was one thing to know he’d be going up against the likes of Helmuth again. It was something else entirely to think Helmuth might harm a man Cody saw as a brother.
Bill stared at his friend for a few seconds before he spoke. “Yes, the wheel is in danger, but it ain’t from Helmet-Head. And it ain’t gonna be a problem just yet. He ain’t the one needing the help from you right now. You gotta go see the dead wheel in the park because she needs you.”
Mac huffed. “I do nae think the skinny one is getting his signals right. Wheeler is nae a girl. Well, he’s a vampire and they’re girlie.”
Armand shook his head, mumbling in French about annoying Scotsmen.
That only served to make the twins laugh. Getting under Armand’s skin was something the pair enjoyed greatly.
Bill rubbed his temple with his free hand. “Gus says you’re all smart guys. I ain’t seeing it. Bunch of morons if you ask me. Running around with your heads up your asses, puffing out your chests, growling and snarling.”
Mac opened his mouth and started to protest only to stop and shrug. “Aye. We do that. Car more than most.”
Car kept driving and facing forward as he lifted a hand and flipped off his brother.
“Sharkie, you gotta go see a dead wheel about a mermaid,” said Bill.
“Well, that just managed to get weirder,” said Cody, hoping for a laugh.
Armand stiffened before turning more in his seat. He stared past Cody once more at Gus and there was no doubt he was in deep conversation with the man mentally. He looked to Cody next. “Go. Do as he says. Meet with Wheeler. Change nothing in your routine.”
“Why? What’s going on?” asked Cody, curious as to what Gus had told Armand.
“Cody, this is one of those times it’s better you know the bare minimum to keep you from overthinking the steps that will need to occur,” supplied Armand.
Mac grunted. “When I think of the beach bum, I do nae think of a worrier or an overthinker.”
Armand never broke eye contact with Cody. “Looks can be deceiving.”
Cody wasn’t sure he liked the way the conversation was headed. “Can Gus just give me the rundown himself?”
“No,” said Armand and Bill at the same time.
Bill tipped to one side, lifted a leg and proceeded to break wind for a full minute, sounding as if someone was letting the air from a balloon. He whistled. “Damn. That was a good one.”
In an instant, the SUV was filled with a stench that made Cody wonder if the man had an underlying medical condition that needed to be addressed. For a second, it felt as if his nostrils were being singed by whatever it was that had come out of Bill’s body. He could only hope another baggie full of Bill’s goodies hadn’t emerged with the passing of the gas.
Gagging, Cody tried to put the window down, only to find it didn’t work. “Car, turn off the window safety locks.”
Car coughed and fumbled with one hand while he continued to drive. He released the window locks. Cody and Mac were quick to lower their windows, letting in fresh air.
Armand kept his window closed, for good reason.
The windows of the SUV were treated with UV protectants. Rolling down said protection would be incredibly unwise for anyone with a serious sun allergy.
Such was the case with Armand.
He simply suffered in silence as Bill’s fart lingered, clinging to everything and everyone in the vehicle.
Mac twisted around to face the small man. “I think yer dying. Smells like it.”
Bill smacked his lips and took a huge breath in. “Nah. Smells like tuna fish.”
“You dinnae have tuna for breakfast this morning,” said Mac. “I know. I’ve been keeping an eye on you both.”
That was news to Cody. He’d thought he’d been the one left holding the babysitting bag. He had to wonder if Casey had asked Mac to help as well, or if the wolf-shifter had simply assumed the responsibility out of an affinity for the two men.
It felt as if the latter was the right answer.
Bill waggled his brows. “I know. I said it smelled like tuna. I didn’t say it was caused by tuna. Admit it, you’re jealous of it. Your burp looks weak compared to my fart.”
Mac shook his head and chuckled before rolling up his window.
Cody’s attention returned to Armand. “Can we get back to me needing to meet Wheeler because of a mermaid? Gus does know those aren’t real, right?”
Bill snorted. “You do get that most everyone out there doesn’t think tree huggers who can turn into sharks are real, yet there you sit. There is a lot of shit out there that no one thought was real until they learned it was.”
Mac shrugged. “He has a point, Aussie.”
“Don’t help,” advised Cody.
Bill released Gus’s hand and leaned forward slightly, patting Mac’s shoulder over the top of the seat as best he could, considering the fact he wasn’t exactly a tall man with a long reach. “Thanks, Braveheart.”
Wrecked Intel (Immortal Outcasts®): An Immortal Ops® World Novel Page 12