by Liwen Y. Ho
“It’s that show about being stuck on an island,” Matt chimed in, keeping his tone light.
“That’s cool,” Brian yawned. “I’m going to take a shower, then hit the books. Don’t stay up too late, sis.”
“Okay.”
Matt exhaled as Brian passed them on the way to his room. He wasn’t in the mood or the right state of mind to explain to his friend why he was holding his sister’s hand; he could hardly believe it himself. It had all happened so quickly. He’d taken Olive’s hand when he pulled her up and hadn’t let go. Neither had she. That was a good sign, wasn’t it? He ran his thumb along her soft skin and raised his gaze to meet hers. “Is this okay?”
She nodded, a smile playing on her lips. “More than okay.”
“Good. Because I’ve been wanting to do this for a long time.”
Her eyes widened. “Hold my hand?”
“No—I mean yes. I’ve been wanting to tell you how much you mean to me.” He glanced over his shoulder to make sure Brian was out of the room. “Do you remember the first time we talked?”
“Um, you mean the day I moved in across the hall?”
“No, the day we had a real conversation, just you and me. Brian had invited me to his small group and when we came home you were here.”
“Watching TV?”
“Watching TV,” he nodded. “During a commercial, you asked me how the Bible study went and if I liked it.”
“I remember. Brian was amazed you agreed to go. I guess you finally ran out of excuses, huh?” she ribbed. “Or did you just get tired of his pestering?”
“Both,” he confided with a wink. “But that night was a turning point for me in a lot of ways. I’d never been to church before or anything church-related. So when you asked me about it, I couldn’t stop talking. There was so much I wanted to ask.”
“I know. You had your eyes glued to your Bible and couldn’t have cared less that Lost was on. I should’ve waited until after the show was over to talk. I missed the last twenty minutes because of you”—she pretended to pout—“but it was worth it. It’s not every day that someone practically begs me to share the gospel with him. You made it way too easy for me.”
“You did a great job listening and answering my questions.”
“I’ll take that as a sign that I’m going into the right field.”
“You are. You know, since that night you’ve become a really good friend to me. You’re one of the few people, maybe the only person, in my life who I can talk to about anything. I like how we can have serious conversations, but also have fun together.” Why, just last week they had discussed her favorite Scripture verse from the book of Micah and tonight they had a tickling match over a bag of chips. What other girl could he do these things with or he’d want to do them with? Olive was pretty much the whole package. “We have a really cool friendship and I’d never do anything to mess it up. But I’ve been thinking”—he gave her hand a gentle squeeze—“we could be even better as more than friends.”
“More than friends? Are you asking me out?”
“Officially? Yes.”
She grinned. “I accept.”
Yes! He leaned in and cupped her cheek with his hand. “That’s great. This is great.”
“Just one problem, Matt.” She pulled away and grimaced. “I’m pretty sure Brian’s going to go nuts when he finds out. Especially since I’ve never dated anyone before.”
“You’ve never had a boyfriend?”
“No guy’s ever dared ask me out. You’re the first one brave enough to. You do realize if he doesn’t approve, you won’t have anywhere to hide.” Olivia quirked an eyebrow and nodded toward the bedrooms down the hall. “He knows where you live.”
“He also knows me. I’m sure he’d prefer you dating someone he knows instead of a stranger off the street.”
“I think he’d prefer that I date no one at all.”
“Don’t worry, I know better than to do anything to upset him. Even if I did, I can take care of myself. I have more muscles than him,” he joked, “you said so yourself.”
“You’re also more ticklish. But seriously, I should tell him. Maybe after his shower?”
They could deal with Brian later. Right now he only had one thing on his mind. “Let’s break the news to him tomorrow. And whatever happens, we’ll face it together, okay? You and me.”
“Okay. Together sounds good.”
The trust in her eyes made his heart pound. Oh, how he wanted this to work out. He brought her hand to his mouth and kissed her palm. He then lowered his head and whispered, “Close your eyes, Olive.”
“Huh?”
“I want to kiss you.”
“Oh!” She chewed on her lower lip and stammered, “I’ve, uh, never kissed … what if I miss—”
Before she could finish her word, he brushed his lips against hers. Her eyes closed on a sigh and he closed his as well. He deepened the kiss, losing himself in her warmth and sweetness ... just as the ominous pounding of a drum boomed from the surround-sound speakers. It was Lost’s closing theme song. Oh no, Olive had missed the end of the show. He pulled back, expecting to see a pout on her face. “Sorry, you’re going to have to watch this episode online tomorrow.”
Her smile couldn’t have been brighter. “That’s okay.”
“You don’t mind?”
“Nope. I can wait. It’s just a couple of hours away.”
“All right then. In that case, I know what we can do to pass the time.” He wiggled his eyebrows up and down. “It involves our mouths.”
“That’s right, I almost forgot”—she reached around behind him and produced a bag—“we still have chips to finish.”
“Yeah, sure, chips.” Matt grabbed one and ate it, swallowing his disappointment along with the salty snack.
“I’m kidding, Matt.” She poked his side playfully. “We can try your idea, too.”
He spotted the glimmer in her brown eyes and laughed. “Oh, man. You got me.” She really did in more ways than one. His voice shook with emotion as he spoke his next words. “You got me, Olive.”
She wrapped her arms around his neck and murmured, “You’ve got me, too.”
And with that promise, Matt kissed her again with all the hope he had in his heart. There was so much for him to look forward to now that Olive was in his arms. And God willing, she would remain a part of his life from this day on.
----
Present day
Olivia
“Mrs. Chan? Do you want us to read the lists we wrote?”
Olivia jerked her head up to see two pairs of eyes staring at her. She straightened in her chair and uncrossed her legs. The late afternoon sunshine streaming through the second story window made her squint, and she scooted her oak armchair out of the light. She stifled another yawn before replying, “Yes, why don’t you take turns sharing them.”
She wanted to blame her sleepiness on the gloomy December weather, but the rain had momentarily cleared up today. The real reason for her heavy eyelids? She’d had a date with the laundry last night, not to mention, her favorite TV show. Thanks to Netflix, she now had company after her son, Micah, went to bed. This company didn’t require her to listen or empathize or think, which suited her just fine. She did enough of that during the day. Although it was nice to escape from reality for a while, she was paying the price for it today.
Leaning back in her seat, she observed the couple sitting in her office. In their mid-twenties, they were a prime example of initial attraction with their cutesy expressions, frequent eye contact, and eager smiles. And the body contact. She noticed it as soon as they’d sat down on the couch. With their hands clasped together and knees touching, they were about as close as two people could get without sitting on each other. Ah, hormones, what a curse, she groaned inwardly. But without them, she’d be out of a job as a marriage therapist.
The female client turned to her fiancé. “I appreciate how well you listen and care about what I say. I like how yo
u put a lot of thought into planning our dates. You work so hard to save up for our future. You’re the perfect guy for me.”
The young man returned her enthusiasm. “You’re everything I want, too.”
Olivia could feel part of her lunch threatening to come up, and she swallowed hard. Young love, so sickeningly sweet, was literally making her nauseous. She glanced at her watch, grateful the fifty-minute session was coming to an end. She addressed the couple who seemed to be engaged in a sappy staring contest. “All right, I think we made some good progress today. It’s always helpful to remember the positive things about your relationship, such as the traits that attracted you to each other in the first place. As I mentioned earlier, I’ll be on vacation starting tomorrow. In the meantime, I have an assignment for you to do before our next session.”
The young man tore his eyes away from his fiancée. “We love your assignments. What is it this time?”
“Write a list of things that you find frustrating about the other person, traits you think may be points of contention in your upcoming marriage.” Noting the woman’s doubtful look, she continued, “If you can’t think of anything, try writing down the ways you’re different from each other or any areas that you have disagreed about in the past. Be honest and realistic. Marriage is about two imperfect people coming together. I’m here to help you face it with both eyes open. That’s the best way to ensure you will have a successful, fulfilling, and happy relationship.”
Olivia prompted her clients to follow her to the door where they parted ways. “See you in two weeks.”
Once she returned to the room, she sat down at the corner desk to begin jotting notes.
Pre-marital session 3. Focused on strengthening relationship and building common ground between clients. Reviewed homework of positive attributes. New assignment: Listing differences. Address patterns of communication and conflict in next session.
She paused with one end of her ballpoint pen between her teeth as she mused about what she really wanted to write.
Fiancée delusional about fiancé’s perfection. Fiancé is a tightwad and planner = obvious source of conflict in the future. End of honeymoon period: ETA 3 months post-wedding day.
She snickered, so lost in her thoughts that she didn’t hear the knock on the door until it opened.
“Good afternoon, Liv.” A middle-aged brunette stuck her head in and smiled. “How’s it going?”
Olivia’s supervisor entered, carrying a briefcase in one hand and an umbrella in the other. She wore black slacks and a white blouse and had her hair perfectly curled around her shoulders. With her confident smile, Nancy reminded her of the shrinks often portrayed on TV or in the movies: competent, composed, and in control. In other words, perfect. It was a far cry from how Olivia looked or felt. Even with the plaid tweed skirt suit she spent $200 on and her hair held up in a tight bun, she didn’t feel like the thirty-year-old professional she was supposed to be. It was all for show, especially the framed diploma hanging on the white wall behind her. She returned Nancy’s greeting with a sigh. “Hi, Nance. It’s going.”
“Just going? Come on, where’s your excitement? Don’t you love what we do? We’re changing lives. How many people can say that?” Nancy traded her belongings for a feather duster and a spray bottle. Scurrying from one end of the window to the other, she alternately dusted off the windowsill and watered the miniature succulent plants sitting in a row. Next, she turned her attention to the adjacent bookshelf, straightening dozens of toy figures that their younger clients used for play therapy.
Olivia quirked her brow in awe. If only she had half of Nancy’s energy, or more importantly, her passion. Becoming a marriage and family therapist had been her dream since college. She didn’t mind the 3000 hours of internships she needed for licensure or that she earned little more than a fast food worker. She looked forward to seeing clients, listening to their stories, and helping them improve their relationships ... or she used to. Sometime during the last year she’d lost her spark. To be specific, it was around the time she’d given Matt an ultimatum—go to couples counseling or separate—and he’d chosen the latter. If she couldn’t make her own marriage work, how was she supposed to help her clients with theirs?
She signed and dated the client file, then shoved it into the tall metal filing cabinet to her right. She rammed the drawer shut with a loud clang and turned around to see Nancy grimacing. “Sorry. I’m just a little frustrated. Make that a lot frustrated.”
“You’ve come to the right place.” Nancy made her way to the couch and directed Olivia to the therapist’s chair. “Have a seat.”
“You want to role play?” Olivia sat down and kicked off her black pumps. She had done this plenty of times in grad school with case studies her professors made up. Maybe she’d gain some insight that would help her enjoy work again. At the least, it could be an entertaining exercise. “All right, let’s do it. Let me tell you my troubles.”
Nancy shook her head. “No, no, you’re the therapist. I’m the client.”
Chuckling, Olivia slipped her shoes back on and sat up straight. “You wanna play that way, huh? Okay, go for it. I’m all ears.”
Nancy winked and wiped the smile off her face. Her shoulders fell, and she puckered her lips in an exaggerated pout. “Mrs. Chan. You have to help me. I don’t know what to do.”
“Yes, dear—” Olivia dragged her words out with a dramatic flair “—tell me your problems.”
“Be serious,” Nancy shushed her, before resuming her act. “I’m struggling big time with my job. I used to love what I do—I was good at it, too, like really good—but I just don’t like it anymore. I hate going to work. It’s like worse than getting one percent milk in my latte when I asked for two. Are you feeling me?”
Olivia threw her head back as laughter overtook her body. Tears pooled in the corners of her eyes and she blew out a long breath. Wow. She needed that. It felt so good to let go after everything that had happened recently. “That’s terrible! I do not talk like that.”
“I’m just taking some creative liberties. Come on, go with it.” Nancy cleared her throat before continuing. “Are you feeling me?”
Olivia nodded and put on her virtual therapist’s hat. She could act professional even if her heart wasn’t in it. That had been her M.O. for the past year anyway. “It sounds like you’re feeling unhappy because you don’t enjoy your work anymore. Is that correct?”
“Yes! Wow, you’re good,” Nancy cooed. “I am so unhappy. My clients are either big whiners or they’re in denial about their issues. I’m tired of listening to them. Nothing I say makes a difference anyway.”
Yikes. She swallowed hard, wishing she could also swallow the words she just heard. Had she been complaining that much about her clients? Did she truly believe she wasn’t being effective at her job? Someone sure needed a refresher course on empathy. And a good kick in the pants. Thankfully, Nancy was giving her a gentle but firm one. It was time for a reality check. “You feel like it doesn’t make a difference, but do you have reasons to believe that’s true? What kind of feedback have your clients given you?”
“They seem to be happy with my advice. I mean, they keep coming back to see me. Oh, except for that one couple who broke up after the guy asked me out when his fiancée was in the girl’s room.”
Olivia grimaced. “Oh, that was bad. Definitely the craziest thing that’s ever happened to me in this office.” Not to mention, the most disappointing. When she had told Matt about the incident, he hadn’t even looked up from his laptop. Keeping to his work deadline had once again been more important to him than keeping his wife.
Argh. Men. They were all the same.
On second thought, reality stunk. Her personal life was a prime example of that. She’d been searching for love from a man ever since her father left the family when she was eight. She’d married Matt, and he had moved out when their son turned eight. Talk about a bad case of daddy issues. Even with her education and training, sh
e hadn’t been able to stop the cycle from repeating itself. Some relationship expert she was.
“Liv?”
She lifted her eyes from the carpet stain she had been staring at and met Nancy’s blue ones. “Yeah, uh, where were we?”
“The part where I give you a pep talk and tell you you’re going to be okay.”
The room suddenly darkened and a heavy downpour hit the roof like an onslaught of bullets. The storm was back and like the sky, Olivia was void of any light. How she longed for even a glimmer of hope. “Am I, Nance? It doesn’t feel like everything’s going to be okay. I’m a fraud. Here I am telling my clients to do what I say, not what I do. Who am I to be giving relationship advice when my own marriage fell apart?”
“Who better to? Wouldn’t you want to hear from someone who’s gone through the hard times and come out of them for the better? I’d rather have that than someone who spouts off facts they read in a book.”
“You’re talking like Matt and I are going to get back together.”
“You want to, right?”
“Of course I do. But things between us are … kind of complicated.” Much too complicated to disclose to Nancy. Although she was a friend, she was also her superior and the last person she needed judging her actions. Regardless, she still had the same concerns she had when she and Matt separated. “If we do, I want us to do things right. The last thing I want is to go back to our old ways and habits. I don’t want to be hurt or disappointed anymore. Our family needs to be a priority above everything else—except God, of course.”
“He’s been around more these last few months, hasn’t he?”
“That was only after the car accident.” Olivia shrugged. “I want to believe he’s changed, but I just don’t know.”
Nancy nodded. “Give him a chance to prove it. Let his actions speak for him. In the meantime, go home and get ready for your trip. Tomorrow you’ll be relaxing on the beach—”
“With a drink in my hand and all of my worries thousands of miles away.” Olivia closed her eyes, imagining the warmth of the Hawaiian sun and the salty breeze on her skin. “This vacation is just what I need to start fresh.”