by Timothy Zahn
"I'm sure it's obvious," she said. "The only way I can avoid Eldership is to go retrieve myfsss organ from its niche at the family shrine. And to destroy it."
Thrr-gilag took a careful breath, the room seeming to tilt around him. "Mother, you can't do that," he said, hearing in his voice the tone of one explaining something to a very young child. "Tampering with afsss organ is a grand-first felony."
"But it's my ownfsss," she pointed out. "Taken from my own body. Why shouldn't I be able to do what I want with it?"
"Because you can't," Thrr-gilag said. "That's all there is to it. It's the law."
"Oh, come now," Thrr-pifix-a said, tilting her head in that peremptory way Thrr-gilag always associated with her challenges to his schoolwork answers. "Just because something is a law doesn't mean it's right. A thousand cyclics ago it was illegal for anyone except clan and family leaders to have theirfsss organs removed at all."
"I'm familiar with Zhirrzh history, thank you," Thrr-gilag said. "But you can't use arrogant stupidities in our past to justify breaking the law now."
"I'm not trying to justify anything, Thrr-gilag," Thrr-pifix-a said tiredly. "There's no challenge to the law itself in this-I'm sure it was written for good reasons by Zhirrzh who were intent on doing the right thing. All I want is the right to choose for myself. And I should have that right. All Zhirrzh should."
Thrr-gilag closed his eyes. "Who have you told all this to?"
"This part? Just you. Though your brother may have recognized on his own where the track was leading."
"And father, too?" He opened his eyes. "Is that why you moved out of his anchorline range? So he wouldn't have a chance to try to talk you out of it?"
Thrr-pifix-a stood up and stepped over to one of the windows. "Your father is gone, Thrr-gilag," she said, almost too softly for him to hear. "What's left out there at the shrine is not the Zhirrzh I bonded to and worked beside for forty-eight cyclics. I left home because the reminders of what I'd lost were too much to bear."
"I understand," Thrr-gilag said, a twinge of her same ache tugging at him. He'd felt it himself at the shrine: talking to the Elder his father had become was not the same as having his father there beside him. Not really. "I wish I knew what I could say that would make it better."
Thrr-pifix-a turned back from her contemplation of the darkness outside. "I know. And I thank you for caring." She made an attempt at a smile. "I wishI knew what to say to keep you from worrying about me the way you are right now."
"You could say you'll think about this idea of yours some more," Thrr-gilag suggested. "You could say that you understand that this loss is still fresh, and that you'll give it more time to heal before you do anything drastic."
"How about if I just say I'll put you up for the latearc?" she countered, the smile more convincing this time. "With a promise of breakfast at the other end? I won't even make you cook this time."
Thrr-gilag sighed. "I'm sorry, Mother, I wish I could. But I've got to get going. I have to leave for Gree in a few tentharcs."
"Gree?"
"Yes. Klnn-dawan-a's there with a study group."
"Ah," Thrr-pifix-a said. "I should have known. Please give her my best when you see her. I hope you two find the time to be bonded soon. While I'm still around to come to the ceremony."
"Yes," Thrr-gilag murmured, frowning at the unconcerned look on his mother's face. Could it be that she didn't know about the Dhaa'rr threat to revoke the bond-engagement?
No, of course she didn't know. She wasn't talking to Elders anymore. "We'll try to accommodate you," he said. "Look, I really have to go. But you take care. And... keep thinking about all of this. All right?"
"I will," she promised, stepping over to kiss him farewell. "You think about it, too. And take care of yourself."
"Sure. I'll talk to you when I get back. I love you, Mother."
"I love you, my son."
The walk back to the rail seemed longer, somehow, than the earlier walk in the other direction. Colder, too, in the chilly latearc air. Thrr-gilag plodded mechanically along, oblivious to the silent, starlit world around him. And tried to think.
It was a waste of effort. There were too many questions, too many potential crises facing him and his loved ones. And no solutions to any of them.
Should he tell his father what Thrr-pifix-a had planned? Or if not him, should he tell Thrr-tulkoj? Surely the Zhirrzh charged with protecting the Thrr family shrine would want to know of this kind of threat. And it was almost certainly Thrr-gilag's legal duty to report it tosomeone.
But on the other side, it had been only half a cyclic since Thrr't-rokik had been raised to Eldership. If this attempt to run away was really nothing more than an expression of her grief and her struggle to adjust, reporting it would do nothing but cause more trouble for everyone. And shame to go along with it.
Or should Thrr-gilag himself have tried harder to talk his mother out of the whole thing? Canceled his trip to Gree, perhaps, and spent more time with her? Maybe it was loneliness that was driving it, or a cry for help and support?
Maybe he should have told her about the threat to his bonding with Klnn-dawan-a. It would have given him an opening to suggest that she should bury such radical thoughts for now in favor of family solidarity, as well as reminding her of the advantages Elders had in obtaining knowledge and information.
No. Thrr-pifix-a didn't care about information and knowledge. She cared about her garden, and her cooking, and her edgework, and her family. And Eldership would take three of those away from her.
He sighed, a startling sound in the stillness of the latearc. No, there was nothing more he could do about this. Not right now. Maybe when he got to Gree and had a chance to talk with Klnn-dawan-a, the two of them might be able to come up with something.
He picked up his pace, the weariness lifting a little from his spirit. Yes; Klnn-dawan-a. Together, the two of them would find some way to resolve this mess. All of it.
They had to.
9
The small transport glided in from the western sky, circling the area once before touching smoothly down onto the Dorcas-village landing field. For a few beats the screech of the reversers mixed in with the roar of the engine noise as the pilot braked against the transport's momentum. The craft slowed to a crawl, the roar and screech fading together into a dull rumble. Turning again, much more ponderously now that it was on the ground, it began a leisurely circle back to where Thrr-mezaz and Klnn-vavgi waited.
An Elder appeared in front of Thrr-mezaz. "They're down, Commander," he reported. "The Elders' initial postflight check on the engines shows all systems normal."
"Very good," Thrr-mezaz said. "Inform all perimeter warriors to stand down to secondary-alert status. And have the Stingbirds recalled from their escort zones."
"I obey, Commander," the Elder said, and vanished.
"Well, here we go," Thrr-mezaz commented, glancing at Klnn-vavgi. "You ready, Second?"
"Not really, no," Klnn-vavgi said. "To be perfectly honest, Thrr-mezaz, this whole thing makes me nervous. There's no reason I can think of why Dkll-kumvit should need to come all the way down here just to talk to us. That's what he's got direct laser links for."
"Maybe he just wants to overview our defensive setup for himself," Thrr-mezaz said.
"He can do a blame sight better overview from orbit than he can from down here," Klnn-vavgi said. "Anyway, he's a ship commander. You ever known a ship commander who voluntarily came down on the ground?"
Thrr-mezaz shrugged. "There's always a first time."
"You believe that if you want to, Commander," Klnn-vavgi growled. "I say he's got a hummer with him, and that we've got some bad news coming."
The transport rolled to a stop in front of them, a landing ramp unfolding from its side as its doorway slid open. Dkll-kumvit was waiting at the top, and even before the ramp had completely settled into place, he was on his way down.
"Good postmidarc to you," Thrr-mezaz said as the other reached the ground. "I
'm Commander Thrr-mezaz; Kee'rr. This is Second Commander Klnn-vavgi; Dhaa'rr."
"Commander Thrr-mezaz; Second Commander Klnn-vavgi," Dkll-kumvit acknowledged. "I'm Supreme Ship Commander Dkll-kumvit; Ghuu'rr."
"Honored, Supreme Ship Commander Dkll-kumvit." Thrr-mezaz gestured, and the three warriors waiting with thekavra fruit stepped forward.
The ritual was quick and perfunctory, all the more so here in the middle of a war zone. "I have some matters to discuss with you, Commander," Dkll-kumvit said when they were finished. "Have you a place where we can speak in private?"
"Certainly, Supreme Commander," Thrr-mezaz said, carefully keeping his emotion out of his voice. A private talk... and that pouch riding on Dkll-kumvit's waist was just the right size for a hummer. Klnn-vavgi had called it, all right. "This way, please."
A hunbeat later the three of them were in Thrr-mezaz's office, the door securely closed behind them. "The following is official Warrior Command business," Dkll-kumvit called into the air, pulling the expected hummer from his waist pouch. "For the ears of the commander and second commander alone."
He set the hummer on the desk and turned it on, and an intrusive, pulsating tone filled the room. "Is that setting all right, Commander?" he asked Thrr-mezaz.
"It's fine," Thrr-mezaz said, not entirely honestly. Hummers were highly effective at masking normal speech from the diminished hearing capacity of Elders, and were thus useful in situations where Elder eavesdropping was unacceptable for one reason or another. The Elders themselves, who hated being left out of things, had tried on at least five occasions to get the Overclan Seating to institute a total ban on the devices. They'd failed all five times, vowing each time to try again.
It was, in Thrr-mezaz's opinion, a great deal of fuss and fury over nothing. Despite their apparent advantages, hummers were unlikely ever to come into common use for the simple reason that the same sounds that interfered with Elder hearing also rattled the brains of everyone within earshot. Some Zhirrzh were so sensitive that they became physically ill; for most others a reasonably short exposure wasn't much of a problem, though even with them there was a fair chance of winding up with a headache for a tentharc or two afterward.
Thrr-mezaz himself fell somewhere between those two extremes, and he was pretty sure Dkll-kumvit knew it. The supreme ship commander's use of the device anyway was an unpleasant underscoring to the seriousness of the visit.
"I expect you're both wondering what this visit is all about," Dkll-kumvit said, leaning back into his couch. "To be honest, I'm not sure I understand myself all of what's going on. But I'm getting some disturbing rumblings; and since you two are the Zhirrzh on the firing line, I wanted to give you as much advance warning as possible."
Thrr-mezaz glanced at Klnn-vavgi. Something special from the Human-Conquerors? "What sort of rumblings, Supreme Commander?"
"Political ones, of course," Dkll-kumvit grunted, making a disgusted noise in the back of his throat. "Even in the middle of a war you can never seem to lose the politics." He looked hard at Thrr-mezaz. "Especially politics pertaining to or emanating from Elders. And right now, Commander, you are the Zhirrzh they want most on the hot seat."
Thrr-mezaz grimaced. "Prr't-zevisti."
"You got it," Dkll-kumvit agreed. "Many of the Elders consider you responsible for his death."
"Actually, Supreme Commander, there's no real proof that he's dead," Klnn-vavgi put in. "Considering all the metal the Human-Conquerors use, it's entirely possible that they simply have him trapped up there."
"Unlikely," Dkll-kumvit said. "But I suppose it's possible. Still, at this point it almost doesn't matter what's actually happened to him. The fact is that Prr't-zevisti has vanished; and the political reality is that you, Commander Thrr-mezaz, are going to be held accountable."
Klnn-vavgi snorted. "With your permission, Supreme Commander, I'd like to say that that's not only ridiculous but also unfair. This is a war zone, not a student field trip. A million things happen out here that can't be anticipated or controlled by anyone."
"I agree completely, Second Commander," Dkll-kumvit said dryly. "Unfortunately, I'm not the one you need to convince. And if you'll permit me a certain degree of speculation, I would suggest that your presence here as second commander is part of the reason the Dhaa'rr Elders are stirring this particular pot so strongly. I suspect they're hoping to use this Prr't-zevisti business as a lever to get you promoted to command on Dorcas."
Klnn-vavgi hissed in contempt. "I've already had that offer. I told Speaker Cvv-panav that I wasn't ready for this command, and that I didn't want it."
"I applaud your loyalty, Second Commander," Dkll-kumvit said. "As well as your assessment of your experience and capabilities." His tongue flicked sourly. "Unfortunately, clan Speakers like Cvv-panav never let such trifles as common sense stand in the way of what they want. No disrespect to your clan intended, Second Commander."
"None taken, Supreme Commander," Klnn-vavgi assured him. "I have no illusions as to the purity and nobility of any clan leaders, including my own."
"What exactly is the gist of the Dhaa'rr argument?" Thrr-mezaz asked. "That I had no business putting the pyramids and theirfsss cuttings outside our defense perimeter in the first place?"
"That's basically it, yes," Dkll-kumvit said. "They also claim that after Prr't-zevisti's cutting was captured, you did little or nothing to intervene."
"Do they note that my own Elders strongly advised me to hold back?" Thrr-mezaz countered. "Out of concern that Prr't-zevisti'sfsss cutting would be destroyed if we attacked?"
"Or that Prr't-zevisti himself had the option of returning to his family shrine at any point along the way?" Klnn-vavgi added. "I would suggest that that gives him a fair amount of the blame for whatever's happened to him."
"As I've already said, Second Commander, this is politics, not logic," Dkll-kumvit said quietly. "All I came here for was to make you aware of the situation as it currently exists. Whatever moves are made next will be directed at Commander Thrr-mezaz. It'll be up to him to deal with them."
"I appreciate the warning, Supreme Commander," Thrr-mezaz said. "I'll try not to let any of this interfere with the smooth operation of this beachhead."
"I'm sure you won't, Commander." Dkll-kumvit gestured at the village-area map on the wall. "So. Anything new on your search efforts north of the village?"
"Not yet," Thrr-mezaz said. "The Elders have completed their examination of the surface and are starting to look underground."
"Hard work, that, even for Elders," Dkll-kumvit commented. "There are always annoying little veins of metal ore that get in the way down there. I take it they've examined the rocks and trees as part of their surface search?"
"Yes." Thrr-mezaz nodded. "Quite thoroughly."
"Um," Dkll-kumvit rumbled, gazing at the map again. "You really think that Human-Conqueror warrior team was trying to get to something out there?"
"I wouldn't have the Elders searching if I didn't," Thrr-mezaz said.
"And if they don't find anything?"
"I'll ask your permission to move the pyramid to a new area and continue the search," Thrr-mezaz told him. "Whatever's out there, the Human-Conquerors seem to consider it important. I wouldn't want to treat it any less so."
"Well, I hope you're right," Dkll-kumvit said. "A success here could prove highly important. In more than just matters of war."
Thrr-mezaz nodded. A significant warrior success that followed directly from his placement of the pyramids outside the perimeter would go a long way toward deflating the arguments of his political opponents. "I understand, Supreme Commander," he said. "If there's something out there the Human-Conquerors want, we'll get to it first."
"Good." Dkll-kumvit stood up. "Then I suppose I'd best get back to theImperative and let you get on with your work. Never know when the Human-Conquerors will try their hand at another attack, and I'd hate to be stuck here on the ground while my warships fight it out up there."
He reached for
the hummer; paused. "One other thing, Commander," he said. "I've heard back from Warrior Command on my request for reinforcements. It's been denied."
Thrr-mezaz looked at Klnn-vavgi. "The whole request?"
"The whole request," Dkll-kumvit confirmed. "No new warships for me; no new ground warriors for you. And no heavy air-assault craft for either of us."
Thrr-mezaz grimaced. So much for any attacks on the Human-Conquerors' mountain stronghold, then, at least for the foreseeable future. The expeditionary force had included just two of the heavy-weapon air-bombardment craft, a tenth of the number that should have been assigned for this sort of invasion. Dkll-kumvit had argued strongly against the decision, protests that had been ignored by the parsimonious strategists at Warrior Command. The result had been both inevitable and crippling: both air-assault craft had been destroyed within the first tentharc of the invasion. "Did they give you any reasons?" he asked Dkll-kumvit.