“Sam, I think most of it is just that I’m really afraid I’m going to relapse, that I’ll have another incident or that Janice will start appearing again. I know I’m getting paranoid. You remember my big episode when I was sure that Richard and Janice were plotting against me? I don’t know what’s going on, but sometimes I feel like Richard is plotting against me. It’s not that he says or does anything, but sometimes, I’ll walk out of a team meeting and he looks at me like I’m a specimen. Of course I say something friendly and we’re best buddies again.”
“Mark, as we discussed recently, the big difference between now and when you had your episode is that now you’re aware that your perceptions are not always reality. Before, you believed in them completely and let your beliefs drive your actions. Now, you can try to evaluate your thoughts to see if they make sense, then act accordingly. I suspect you’re doing just fine with Richard. Did you bring this up with him as we discussed? ”
“No,” Mark replied looking at his shoes. “Things are going so well at work that I really don’t want to stir things up.”
“And you think bringing this up with Richard will ‘stir things up’?”
Mark looked up at Sam a bit sheepishly. “I guess that after all Richard has done for me, I don’t want to question his loyalty.”
“Okay. I can see that. How about I help you get off the hook. Sit down with Richard and tell him you have doctor’s orders to discuss how he’s feeling about you, the company, and your return. Hopefully that will open dialog between you two. After all, you’ve been best friends for years and I’m sure you’ve had some difficult conversations. Take a deep breath and go for it. If there is some resentment there, I can’t think of anything better to resolve it than to have an honest discussion about your respective feelings. What do you think?”
“Yeah. You’re right. I’ll try.”
Sam almost suggested he do more than try but she decided to move on. Mark understood what he had to do.
“So putting Richard aside for the moment, how are you dealing with the anxiety? You mentioned nightmares and paranoia. Is it manageable or should we be looking at upping your anti-anxiety meds to help out for a while?”
Mark thought carefully. Did he really want more meds? No. He could handle this. It was just tough.
“Sam, you warned me that it was going to be rough. It is. So far though, I think I’m handling it. Yeah, I’m frightened a lot of the time, but I’m holding it together. I’m not drinking or using coke again. When things get bad, I think about Johatchen, my team and the great work we’re doing. You know, now that I’m clean and managing better, the company is growing faster than it was before. I’m focused on the fact that Johatchen is my baby and I’m going to do my best to nurture it.”
Mark paused again before continuing.
“Before we dive into the scary stuff, there is one other thing I wanted to talk to you about. I know you saw George Gray’s articles on the women who were murdered because I talked with Jack about it at lunch yesterday.
“Sorry. I know we can’t go into the personal stuff. Anyway, I wanted you to know that I knew both of them and I knew their husbands. Michael James’ and Marshall Lewis’ deaths were tragedies. Michael and I were officially competitors, but in fact, we worked together more often than we competed. We did quite a few joint projects together. He was a genius.
“And Marshall. I’m sure Jack has talked about him, but Marshall was our mentor. We wouldn’t be who we are without him. Both Michael and Marshall were bigger than life figures in my life and it makes me angry they’re gone. And they’re gone because of their wives.
“Janice and I were close friends with Michael and Ashima. I never really understood why she left him. Sure, we all discussed his step-daughter’s issues, but they should have gotten counseling. Yeah, that Brittany. She’s a piece of work.
“Instead, Ashima just walked out – no notice, no discussions. One day she was gone and never came back. Just like Julia and Janice. Sometimes I wonder if they didn’t work together to get the courage to leave their husbands. Ashima ruined Michael’s life; Julia ruined Marshall’s life, and Janice ruined mine.”
“Mark, we’ve discussed this. First, your life is not ruined. You, yourself, said that Johatchen is becoming more and more successful and you’re enjoying working with your team. As for Janice, as we discussed, people leave for a lot of reasons, and I’m sorry to be a blunt, but as we’ve discovered, you’ve had issues for quite a while. They may have contributed to some of your problems as a couple. “
Sam kicked herself. That was totally inappropriate. Was it because of her discussion with Jack? She looked over at Mark and could see him withdraw. God! She was supposed to be building trust, not attacking Mark.
“Mark, I’m sorry. That was wrong of me to say. I don’t know Janice. I don’t know your marriage. Janice may well have been a horrible person. I truly apologize.”
Then, before he could think about it too much, Sam asked, “So what about Janice? Is she still gone or has she returned with all the work you’re doing?”
Mark paused. He stepped back mentally and did the exercises he’d practiced to separate what he thought and felt from what was rational. Sam was his only path back to himself. Okay. She’d made a mistake. She apologized. He needed to trust her. It made sense that as a woman, she’d feel defensive. After all, he probably came across as attacking all women, not just Janice. That’s certainly what he felt during his lunch with Jack. Jack was really negative about wives of entrepreneurial technologists. He’d kind of gotten caught up in that.
“I’m sorry too, Sam. I think I went too far. I’m probably picking up on my conversation with Jack. He was pretty upset about all of this. I shouldn’t have gone there.”
Alarm bells went off again. Sam was walking too fine a line here. She was dating a friend of her patient. How stupid could she be? On the other hand, it sure seemed like everyone knew everyone in the tech industry. Maybe it was unavoidable. No. Probably not. She’d have to get some advice from Dr. Karmere. He’d certainly tell her to drop one or the other. She couldn’t abandon Mark. They were so close to a breakthrough. She could feel it. And Jack? Jack was right. There was something there; something she’d never felt before. She couldn’t walk away from either of them.
And then there was Brittany. Mark knew her too and she knew Jack, Marshall, Julia, and Janice. And now, there were these murders. Was this a macabre repeat of her experience with Liz? Could another of her patients be a serial killer? Could it be Jack? It was getting too complicated. She definitely needed to talk to Dr. Karmere. But for now, Mark had to be her focus.
“No, Mark. I’m the professional. But as you see, I’m human too and I make mistakes. I am sorry. Let’s move on. So, what about Janice?”
“It’s okay. I’m sorry too. Let’s keep going. God knows I really need the help. No, Janice has not come back. But I have this ominous feeling that she or someone is lurking out there about to appear. It scares me. With all our discussions about my mother, I feel like my mother is watching me, not Janice. And my nightmares – they’re all about my mother.
“I know she’s dead, but I have this horrible feeling she’s coming to get me. You don’t believe in ghosts, do you Sam?”
“No Mark, I don’t. Let’s hear about these nightmares. Maybe we can make some sense of them. In the worst case, in my experience, talking about nightmares reduces their power over us.”
Chapter 4
“The media's the most powerful entity on earth. They have the power to make the innocent guilty and to make the guilty innocent, and that's power. Because they control the minds of the masses.”
- Malcom X
1
George Gray settled into his chair and put his feet up on his desk. He grabbed the whiffle basketball and tossed a perfect swish shot into the small basket mounted on the top edge of his cubicle wall. Finally, a quiet day. He had no urgent stories to work on since he was winding down his work load in prepara
tion for the vacation that he and Morris had discussed. It would be his first since starting at the Sentinel.
More than a month had passed since the last murder, and while what’s-his-name promised more to come, George was happy for the respite. He and Janey were finally going to take a real honeymoon. In two days, they were off to Tahiti for sun, sand, snorkeling, kayaking, and whatever other water sports they could come up with.
It was the off-season in Tahiti and they’d gotten a great deal on their ten-day trip. They’d start with four days on Moorea, one of the main islands, then they’d catch a plane to a remote atoll in the Tuamotu islands called Tikehau. Although they’d be staying in a luxury resort with an over-the-water cabana and its private deck and ladder down into the water, they could kayak to one of the many nearby motus – small parts of the reef covered in sand and dotted with coconut palm trees.
Janey had done the research and explained to George what an atoll was. George had heard the term and knew about the nuclear testing that was done in the area decades before, but he hadn’t realized that an atoll wasn’t just another name for an island. No. An atoll was what remained after the island sank into the sea.
When Janey explained it to him, George almost thought she was making up a story of a Polynesian Atlantis. He wouldn’t put it past her. Janey was constantly telling him fantastic stories with a perfectly straight face. Only about half were true and she took great pleasure in saying ‘got ya!’ when he fell for one of the false ones. He guessed she was working to help him sort fact from fiction – critical in his job. But she was definitely having a good time with these lessons.
Anyway, he’d learned that indeed, an atoll was the remnants of a former volcanic island. Over time, the volcano created an island through its eruptions. Coral reefs formed around the island and built up to the point where they rose above the surface of the water. Millennia of pounding waves turned the tops of the reefs into sand and passing coconuts landed and took root. Over time, the island was surrounded by these reefs. Between the reefs and the island was a lagoon. Usually, there were breaks in the reefs called passes (named by sailors whose boats were able to access the islands through the otherwise impenetrable reefs).
The individual parts of the reef which were disconnected from each other (above water) were called motus. Apparently, the main islands of Tahiti, including Moorea and Bora Bora were volcanic islands with motus surrounding them. In time, they too, would likely become atolls – the volcanos that created the islands are now extinct and would eventually collapse into themselves leaving nothing but the surrounding motus. They’ll become atolls – a group of motus surrounding the lagoon left by the collapsed volcanos.
Tikehau was one of thousands of atolls. One of its motus was big enough to include an airport and a small village. A few of the others had fishing, surfing, and diving resorts. And, there were some that were private refuges for the elite.
George couldn’t wait to find one of the deserted motus where he and Janey could snorkel naked and stretch out in the shade of the coconut palms. George could even break open some coconuts so they could feast on the crunchy coconut meat and sip the sweet milk. He could just imagine licking Janey’s lips. In just a few days, they’d be there.
Lost in reverie, George almost missed the sound of the incoming email. Some part of him knew that the vacation was just too good to be true. He looked as his screen. At first, the subject line made him think some spam had made it through the company’s filters, But in the back of his mind, he knew from the sender’s email address who it was. He double clicked and read the latest message.
______________________________
From: fxt97ij5w8eqc
Date: December 1, 20XX 07:01 AM PDT
To: George Gray
Subject: She drives them crazy
George, George, George,
I hear you may be going on vacation. Sorry if my plans impact yours. Quite frankly, I think you should go whatever happens. You’re doing great work and certainly have earned a break with that beautiful wife of yours. I’m sure you’ll both love Moorea and Tikehau. I’ve been there and it truly is paradise.
Don’t worry, I’m not targeting you or her (unless she does to you what the others have done to their husbands).
This time, the only clue I’ll give you is that our victim literally drove her husband crazy. The world will be a better place without her.
Enjoy your trip!
fxt97ij5w8eqc
______________________________
George couldn’t believe it. The guy knew about his vacation and about Janey. This was scary.
George forwarded the email to Mike McKensey and Morris, and as he had done before, he headed over to Morris’ office. Morris looked over his reading glasses as George approached. For the first time since they’d met, George looked angry. Morris invited him in and like the last time, Morris’ phone rang almost immediately. Morris put it on speaker and Mike McKensey and Bob Simpson came on the line.
“I’m sure I know the answer,” Morris began. “But have you guys made any progress on the other two murders?”
“Hold on. We don’t have a third murder,” Bob Simpson replied, clearly insulted.
“It’s okay,” Mike soothed. “We have to admit it, our track record on this one isn’t too good. We’ll dig in. We’ll look for technologists who are in mental institutions or psych wards, or who went crazy and killed themselves, but it’s really not much of a lead. I don’t realistically think we’ll stop this one. Maybe he’ll make a mistake this time. They usually do eventually. He sounds pretty cocky. Plus, he may have overplayed his hand in bragging that he knows about George’s vacation and his wife. And maybe he’s telling us something in having visited Moorea and Tikehau. I don’t know. It could be a red herring. Or maybe he just went to one of the islands. But if he went to both, it was likely a package. We’ll get on that too. In the meantime, who knew about your vacation?”
“I hate to say it,” George replied. “But in addition to our travel agent, pretty much everyone here at the Sentinel knows and I’m pretty sure all the folks at Janey’s office know too. And by the way, it’s only one island. The other is an atoll.”
“What’s the difference?” Bob asked.
“An atoll is just a reef encircling a lagoon with a collapsed volcanic island underneath,” Mike replied tiredly. “But did you tell everyone that you were visiting both places, or just Tahiti generically?”
“Ah, as far as I know, I didn’t tell anyone that we were visiting Moorea and Tikehau. I just said Tahiti. But as for Janey, she was pretty enthusiastic about the fact that Tikehau is an atoll. Don’t feel bad Bob, I didn’t know what an atoll was until last night when she explained it to me. Anyway, I suspect she’s told everyone at her office about Tikehau and atolls.”
“Okay. We’ll look there and we’ll talk to your travel agent. In the meantime, do you think it’s possible that anyone could have had access to your computer or phone?”
“I really don’t think so. I keep both with me all the time and our IT security guy, Miguel, does regular sweeps of our systems to make sure we don’t have any viruses or malware on them.”
Morris nodded. “We’re pretty confident in our security here. Miguel is one of the best. But George, why don’t you talk to Miguel and have him do a thorough exam of your system. You never know.”
“Will do, Chief!”
“And don’t call me –“
“Sure Chief!”
Mike and Bob chuckled. “I’m glad you guys can keep your sense of humor,” Mike continued. “Keep us in the loop if you hear anything and we’ll do the same. Quite frankly, though, it’s getting depressing. We haven’t had any success until now and I suspect these so-called leads are just red herrings. Last time he had us chasing our tails and we weren’t even close to stopping him from murdering Julia Lewis. I just don’t know.
“Ah George, each time he’s contacted you
, you’ve also had an email about internet bad guys, right? Did you get one this time?”
“I’ll go check.”
George made his way to his cubicle fully expecting to see an email about the next internet mogul target. Nada. He refreshed a few times but nothing came in. It actually felt a bit strange. Even though he tried to tell himself that he was dealing with two different people, he recognized that subconsciously, he’d associated the two. Now it felt like something was wrong. He couldn’t put his finger on why, but his gut was telling him that this time, things would be different.
Returning to the conference room, George announced that so far, he hadn’t received another email from the informant.
“Well,” said Mike. “If you don’t mind, let us know if you do get one. You don’t need to tell us what it’s about unless it affects the case at hand or if you need some help from our side, but I would like to know. I’m not sure why, but this feels a bit different to me.”
George just smiled. Maybe he was developing a cop’s instincts. Then again, it was just a change in the pattern. It didn’t necessarily mean anything.
After Mike and Bob left, Morris turned to George. “So, what are you thinking with respect to your vacation?”
“Yeah. I was asking myself the same thing. It’s paid for. It will be the first one since I started here. And Janey would kill me if we had to cancel.”
“Look George. As you know, I’ve had a long career. In my early days I worked ridiculous hours with no vacations, and while I did get ahead faster than most, at some point, I was working longer and harder, but not as effectively. My boss at the time forced me to take a vacation. I didn’t want to go. But once away, after three or four days of panicking and calling the office, I was finally able to step back and enjoy myself with Martine.
The Misogynist Page 13