by Lucy Langton
So instead she focused her gaze out to sea as a few lanterns were lit across the deck, shedding some light to be able to see by. She watched the waves crash against the ship and felt the wind pass her by as it got caught up in the sails, pulling the Emerald along the water. She felt the sway of the ship, a sensation that seemed to no longer bother her, and as she took deep breaths of the fresh, salty air, she could almost relax enough to sleep.
A few paces away down the gunwale of the port side of the ship, she noticed another pirate come to stand and keep watch. She glanced at him for a moment, curious to see if she knew him yet, and was surprised to see that the man was James. She quickly became awake again, pulling her eyes back to the water incase he’d suspect her of watching him instead of keeping watch for other ships sailing this way. But every once in a while, she’d sneak a glance at him, almost making a game out of it so she could both stay awake and perhaps catch him looking at her, too.
There was one time that Maria glanced over and indeed caught James looking at her. But he just wasn’t looking. He was watching her, studying her with eyes that weren’t filled with lust or hate like most pirates she encountered, but with curiosity. She quickly looked away, a blush creeping onto her face as she heard him chuckle, a low rumble against the blowing breeze. It frustrated her that he would watch her so when it was his fault that she was on this wretched ship and not with her family. It was that thought that caused anger to boil up inside her.
The one thing Maria wasn’t expecting to hear on a pirate’s ship was music. She turned, wide-eyed, towards the sound of a guitar being played, having only heard such a thing once before when she met a young lady at the orphanage teaching another child how to play the simple instrument. Maria saw a pirate sitting with his back against the gunwale strumming the four-course stringed instrument, his voice low just like the sounds he was creating with fingers that moved expertly over the strings. As Maria listened, she didn’t understand the language the pirate was singing in, despite her rigorous education, but could tell that the song was melancholy in nature. She felt the weight of the song in her heart as she watched the man play for several minutes.
Maria glanced at James, who was looking at her again. He gestured towards the guitar player as others started to gather around. At first Maria hesitated, wondering if she would get in trouble for not standing watch, but when James neared her again and whispered for her to follow him, she felt confident that if one of the Captain’s trusted men were inviting her, then she could trust him.
And so Maria followed James closer to the sound of the guitar, and together with the others standing watch that night, they stood and listened to the music. When the man finished his song, he was encouraged to continue, and soon he started playing a more cheerful tune, a smile crossing his face. A few of the pirates clapped along as others swayed to the music. Maria couldn’t help but smile as she looked around, never imagining that pirates would be so moved by music, or that any of them would know how to play an instrument.
“Do you like music?” James asked her as he moved closer to her so he could speak softly without the others hearing them.
“I love music,” Maria replied. “I’m proficient at the pianoforte and often play for the orphanage in Portsmouth. When we lived in London, I used to sing at dinner parties my mother would host for her friends.”
James smiled as he watched the joy that seemed to fill Maria’s face as she recalled those happy memories. “I heard Jenkins speaking of your singing voice. Perhaps you’d like to sing for us now,” James offered, knowing that Miguel, the guitarist, would not mind singing with a beautiful young lady.
“Perhaps another time,” Maria reasoned, not wanting to bring any attention to herself. “And you? Do you enjoy music?”
“I enjoy things that make the men happy. So, in a way, I do,” James explained.
Maria regarded him for a moment before she spoke her next words. “You’re very focused on your work,” Maria said, wondering if there was anything more to James than being a pirate.
James chuckled at her observation of him and simply shrugged his shoulders. “This ‘work’, as you say, is my life. I was born a pirate, I was raised a pirate, I was trained to manage a ship, and one day I’ll be Captain,” James said in a causal manner. To him, it was whatever pirate aspired to be. But to Maria, it sounded like a form of slavery. She simply couldn’t understand what James meant.
“Surely you’d want to live a decent life instead of all of this,” Maria said, gesturing to the ship and the sea.
James did his best to contain his mirth as he regarded Maria. She was a young lady of a completely different world than his own. Though she might consider pirates to be ruthless and degrading, to him these men were his family. And being a pirate was just a way of life. “I have never known another life that would tempt me away from the sea. I couldn’t imagine living in a house, ordering servants around all day, and spending my idle hours playing the piano,” James said, loving the way Maria’s face tightened in anger.
“And I can’t imagine why anyone would want to be filthy every day, smelling of sweat and working till their skin burns from the sun,” Maria said, trying to keep her voice low even though her anger was getting the better of her. To calm herself, Maria crossed her arms over her chest and focused on the song of the guitar player, and the crashing of the waves on the hull sounding below.
“Please, kalos, let us not argue. We are simply too different to understand each other’s wants in life,” James said, taking his water skin from his side and handing it to Maria. She took it and sniffed the contents, surprised when she recognized wine. She hesitated before taking a drink, never having enjoyed wine in the presence of men. Here and there she’d enjoyed a bit at dinner and in the drawing room afterwards with the women attending the ball or a dinner party, but never had she solely drank wine amongst men.
Maria looked into James’ eyes as she brought the water skin to her lips, enchanted by his dark green globes that seemed to draw her into their depths. She knew that she wasn’t standing in the drawing room listening to someone play music while she talked with different gentlemen. No, her life was now upon this ship until she could find a way to escape. And since she didn’t know when, or if, she’d ever return to England, she decided that she’d live her life the way she wanted to. At least here on this ship there were no members of the Ton watching her, waiting to spread gossip about her actions or shame her for drinking wine amongst the men. She was the only one who could ever speak of what she’d done in the future, and that thought alone gave her a new sense of freedom.
Taking a large drink from the water skin, Maria enjoyed the fruity taste of the wine as it slid down her throat. She drank greedily at first, enjoying the taste after having had only stale water and greasy food to eat for days. James laughed as he took the water skin from her, afraid that she’d drink the whole thing if given the chance.
“I wasn’t expecting you to do that,” James said as he placed the cork back in the water skin.
“It seems that most men don’t expect me to do much,” Maria said with a smile, enjoying the feeling of the wine and how it helped her relax. As she watched the guitar player start another song, she felt for the first time since being kidnapped that she could relax. She wasn’t afraid of being killed, tortured, or of what the pirates had planned for her. Her heart wasn’t filled with fear or pounding in her chest with great anxiety. Her muscles actually felt relaxed instead of tense or exhausted. Just for this moment, she could enjoy the music and simply be herself.
James gestured for her to sit with him, and she did, crossing her legs as she rested her elbows on her knees, resting her head in her hands. James simply watched her as she enjoyed the music, thinking that even though she’d transformed these last two weeks, she was still truly beautiful.
“I would have never guessed that you’d be the adventitious type, Maria. A young lady from England, from a higher-class family, no doubt, who is now sitting crossed
legged on a ship full of pirates, wearing men’s trousers. I can only imagine how ashamed your mother would be,” James said with a wink, a rumble of laughter in his chest. Maria couldn’t help but laugh along with him, knowing that if anyone of the Ton could see her now, they’d be utterly shocked.
“Who are you to judge me? You are a pirate, after all. A man who sails the seas, living as though he’s a free spirit, a life rid of prejudice and stereotypes. Certainly you could not judge my behavior any more than I could judge you. I’m simply human, making the best out of a grim situation. And since I am no longer in England anymore, I dare say that I don’t have to act like an English lady,” Maria said, rambling a bit as the wine took full effect. James nodded along with her words, laughter escaping him, causing Maria to laugh alongside him. It had been a long time since she’d laughed so and couldn’t deny that she’d missed it.
“Then if this is not what an English lady is supposed to act like, someone who is as fierce and determined such as yourself, do tell me what your life was like back in England,” James said, his voice becoming soft again as their gazed locked.
“You mean before you kidnapped me,” Maria said before she could stop herself. James’ face stiffened, and Maria could clearly notice the pain her words caused him.
“Yes, Maria. Tell me more about what a wealthy person in England does so that perhaps I might be less biased towards them,” James said, a small smile on his lips as he tried to move past the reality of their situation. Just for this night, he wanted to enjoy Maria’s company and forget that he was a pirate and she was his captive.
“Well then, since it will be for your better education and opinion,” Maria said, deciding to let go of her anger for a time. James smiled genuinely then as Maria stared detailing her life. She talked about her brother, Gregory, and what fun it had been to grow up with an older brother who always took her on long walks when her family resided in the country. Then, when Maria was of age, they moved to London so Maria could start attending the Season. She excitedly talked about all the balls and parties she attended with her best friend, Charlotte. Then Maria gave details of what it was like to attend Charlotte’s wedding before her family moved to Portsmouth while the Season in London was finished.
“So, why didn’t a young lady such as yourself, from a prestigious family with lots of money, not win over the heart of such a gentleman that Charlotte was able to capture?” James asked, passing the water skin to Maria as she took another swig, passing it back to James who did the same.
“It is probably because most men don’t appreciate what I have to say. You see, an English gentleman wants a beauty for a wife, but one that keeps her good opinion to herself. I have the tendency to speak my mind on certain matters, which includes the fact that my father employs slaves to tend to his plantations,” Maria explained, causing James to chuckle.
“I can definitely see that strong nature in you, kalos,” James said as he nodded his head in agreement. “There is a lot of money to be made with slavery and I can see why a wealthy man like your father would employ the cheap labor of slaves in the West Indies,” James agreed, not being able to fault her father for that.
“But I don’t understand why anyone would steal people from their families and sell them to a slave master, to work till they are exhausted, with no hope of ever seeing their family again,” Maria said, becoming choked up on her words since she was now a slave. Though Captain Maidus had granted her some freedoms on the ship, he hadn’t granted her the freedom to return home.
“I was once a slave,” James said, his voice soft again as he looked away from Maria. She looked at him with wide-eyes, immensely curious about what he could possibly mean.
“It took a while for me to discover the details of my birth. From as long as I could remember, I was always told that my mother’s name was Tanya Ihram. My earliest memories are of being on a ship, around pirates and men, the sounds of screaming and cries filling my dreams,” James said, turning his head a little towards her so she could hear him clearly.
“There came a time when I was placed within an orphanage in Tripoli, and by always remembering my mother’s name, I eventually came to learn of her family. I was welcomed into her childhood home by her sister, who shared with me all the details of my mother and father.
“Tanya had fallen in love with an English lord and left secretly with him one night, only telling her sister where she was going and asking for her to keep her secret. My mother’s sister explained that their father was a very brutal man and that she saw this as her only way to escape. So, she left Tripoli behind. It was some years later that news reached my mother’s family that the navy ship she’d left on had been attacked and those onboard sold into slavery. It was also learned that my mother had died onboard the ship before the attack, and there was nothing concerning the English lord she’d fled with,” James explained. He took a deep breath, trying to clear those distance memories away because he knew that the past couldn’t haunt him any longer.
“So, my mother’s sister finished raising me, and when I was old enough, I joined a pirate captain as a ship hand, eventually meeting Captain Maidus and becoming a true pirate,” James finished, shrugging his shoulders as though to say that his tragic past was of no immense importance to him.
Maria sat in silence for a few minutes as she thought over his words. It was terribly sad to think that James had grown up amongst pirates, without a mother or father, and as she thought about the men she’d encountered since she’d been kidnapped, she couldn’t imagine any of them raising a baby.
“So, you’re part British?” Maria said, finding the fact a bit ironic.
“According to my mother’s sister, it could be a strong possibility. All I have is one woman’s story. But my past is not important to me. Just my future,” James added.
Maria’s brows furrowed as she considered James’ words for a moment. “So, even after learning that your parents were possibly killed by pirates, you still wanted to become one? How can you kidnap people and sell them as slaves when you consider your own past? People are not merchandise,” Maria said, becoming frustrated with James that he could do such a thing.
James narrowed his eyes at Maria, not appreciating her judgement of him. “And yet you freely enjoyed the money of your father, who takes advantage of slavery and benefits from the work that I do. If it wasn’t for pirates kidnapping and selling them into slavery, your father would have no slaves to buy and force to work his plantations. My dear, you are a hypocrite if you can judge me for my life’s work when you’ve lived a life of luxury because of it,” James said sternly, leaning close to her as his anger built. But the closer he came to her, the more he began to think about how he’d much rather enjoy kissing her than spitting words at her.
His eyes drifted to her lips, and though Maria was furious with this man for accusing her of being a hypocrite when she’d had countless arguments with her father over the same matter, she couldn’t deny how warm her cheeks were getting as James leaned close to her. When his eyes drifted to her lips, she parted them, surprised that he would go from being angry with her to perhaps considering stealing a kiss from her.
“My father has told me often that I’m an idealist, and that sometimes I think too much for a woman of my age. He even told me I should be more vigilant about finding a future husband than filling my head with such nonsense such as slavery and freedom. But what I find most terrifying is that marriage is no more than a woman being a slave to her husband if that woman doesn’t marry for true love,” Maria said, pulling away from James as she stood and quickly left the group of pirates enjoying an evening of guitar music.
Maria walked away from the music and towards the gunwale on the other side of the ship. It was quieter there and she could breathe easily as the night wind whipped around her, allowing her skin to feel cool after the warmth she’d felt sitting next to James. She couldn’t believe the things she’d said, or the story James had told her of his past, but she knew for ce
rtain that she’d never understand why James willingly lived the life of a pirate. As Maria stared up into the starry night, thinking about her conversation with James and reflecting on how he made her feel, she couldn’t deny that she was filled with great anger. She hated him for kidnapping her, for arguing with her when he too was a slave. But she also couldn’t deny that there was something more that made her heart beat a little faster every time she noticed his eyes on her.