CaCee, everyone needs someone like you in their life so they can exist to their full potential. You bring truth, courage, confidence, laughter, and whole lotta love. You are my constant, forever more. I love you.
Koko, I couldn’t get through a day without your friendship. Thanks for always being the joy in the room. Nobody can get things done quite like you. Your passion for the collection and my life makes me excited to keep doing as much as I possibly can.
Steph, thank you for always helping me find the beauty in broken moments and reminding me to look to God for answers. We have been friends since the beginning and will be to the very end. I love you.
Adrienne, the depth of you is beyond human. Your extraordinary perspective has always given me clarity. I truly respect and adore your wise ass.
Lolo, my fairy. You are the connector of all beautiful things.
Turkey, there is so much magic in your heart. Thank you for breaking the mold. You always are fearlessly yourself. I love you, weirdo.
Erin, thank you for always teaching me that I deserve whatever my heart desires. You have given me insight to a very authentic part of myself, one that pushes boundaries to find a greater artistic depth. I love you and Dylan!
Jessie: BFF, wildflower, loving soul. Your love is family.
Kathy, thank you for always checking in and being the best listener.
Nicole C., you always see me as I am. You embody style and you’re a lover of life.
Jen—the Queen of Venice; there is nobody on this planet who doesn’t want to soak in your radiant glow.
Morgan, thank you for your willingness to help at any moment and for always being your true self.
Jon and Jonathan—my extended family. Every day I am grateful for our purposeful connection. Love y’all.
Trish, Bonnie, Renee, Kev, Laura, Ann Marie, and Stella: Thank you for giving me the space to focus on this book, all while being present for my children. Without y’all I could never be the mom I am today.
Anna, I am so blessed to have you by my side every day. Thank you for always being so selfless and full of integrity. You get this family through all of the craziness with structure and love. This has been one of the most challenging years of my life, physically and mentally, yet you are with me holding my hand, making it all seem possible to manage. Love you, lady.
Evelyn, Sonia, and Marlene: All day, every day I appreciate how you take care of me and my home, my sacred place. This family loves y’all so deeply.
To Kristin, the queen of collages. Thank you for documenting all of my moments. When I look back on this life, I will be able to see the entire metamorphosis as an artistic memory you’ve captured.
Driver Dan: Copy that, 10-4. Love you.
David, thank you for loving me like your own and believing in the power of a woman. I love you.
Cate, your support is endless. I adore you. Thanks for making sure my bills are paid on time! I promise I will make returns. Ha ha.
Teresa, thank you for not just listening to my voice, but actually hearing how it could impact the lives of others. You have a way about you that can move anyone into the heart of a song. There is not one person in the music business that compares to you.
Bart, you are the best vocal producer I have ever worked with. Thank you for allowing me to break down to break through, every single writing and vocal session. I love you.
Carol, you bless my family enormously every day with your devotion, unconditional love, and prayer. That heart you possess is bigger than Texas, and I hope to be half the woman of God you are in this lifetime. God listens to all of us, but somehow, I know that your tap on the shoulder is the most familiar to Him. I love you as much as you love me and my children, which I know is as much love that exists.
Randy and Beth, you have been my valiant protectors since childhood. You are family to me, and have proven time and again that you’ll do anything it takes to ensure that I am safeguarded. I trust you both with everything I have.
Aunt Debbie and Uncle Boyd, I am so grateful that you gave me your blessing to share Sarah’s story and example. You have been models of strength and mercy for me on my journey through life. I love you.
To all my aunts, uncles, and cousins in our beautiful family: I was blessed to grow up with you in Texas, and to continue to have you in my life now. I thank you for every shared moment. I love you.
Mary Jo and Steve, thank you for raising the greatest love of my life. Each and every day, I see how Eric embodies the nurturing values you taught him. You led by example in your marriage and family, and we all benefit from the love you showed him. I am also grateful that you moved out here from Boston so you could be present for the kids and so involved in their lives. They adore Mojo and Pop Pop Ringo.
Nana: You are my prayer warrior. Thank you for holding me so closely in your heart. You have taught me the beauty of surrendering my spirit so that God may do his work in my life.
Papaw: Oh, how I miss you. Our God reigns.
Nanny: His eye is on the sparrow, and I know he watches me, right along with you, my butterfly. Sweet caretaker, you are with me, so I will sing because I’m happy, I will sing because I’m free.
Papa: I never got to hear you preach. My father learned from you, and he was the very best. Thank you for teaching me through him up there on that pulpit.
Nana Maxwell: You are the true essence of beauty and poise. You will last longer than me in high heels celebrating your ninetieth birthday.
Pop Pop Maxwell: You are deeply missed, but seen in every eagle that takes flight.
To my sister, Ashlee, a force of nature. Without hesitation you are the brightest star in the galaxy. Your arrival was the greatest gift of my childhood, and I only adore and respect you more as we go through life together. You overflow with an abundance of twirls and leaps through life, leaving everyone feeling as if they have danced along with you. It is an honor to be an aunt to your deeply loving children. Bronx, you are a superhero with the depth of Socrates. I love you and your philosophical mind. Jagger, you are beauty and love with an extra flavor that is only your own, nobody else’s.
Evan, thank you for giving your heart to my sister and sharing your loving family with ours. Love you.
Dad, you are the maker of my dreams. Your guidance through my life has taught me that there is absolutely nothing I am not worthy or capable of. You are the first I have ever loved, the first I have ever admired. You taught me that “pride comes before a fall” so that I remain humble and steadfast in my journey. You have always given me a safe atmosphere in which to connect to my purpose, You will never have to let me go, nor I you. We remain as we were from the beginning, always and forever. I truly wish there were more words for love, because you deserve them all.
Mom, you are the leader to my destiny. I look to you as the strongest force of soulful ambition. You have made every sacrifice possible in order for me to find center stage with ownership of my voice. I belt out the high notes with ease because you have taught me that the hardest parts can be the easiest to master. I try to look at life through your eyes because of all the beauty you are able to see. You held my purpose inside of you thirty-nine years ago and live every day to help me see it through. The greatest of love is yours. Now that I am a mother, I understand the way you love me. My role model, mentor, best friend, and boss lady . . . we are not just the little engine that could anymore. We are proof that we can—no matter what gets in our way. Thank you for making all things possible. I love you.
Eric, you are the answer to every question, the completion to all equations. My love, you have helped me arrive to the pure abundance of soulful, connected ideas. You have grounded me with an extreme grace of patience while moving with the mosey of my steps as I get myself to this exact purposeful destination. You always trust my direction as God’s because you can discern my heart’s deepest desires. My sexual shaman, I give myself to you, fully. I will forever exist in your stratosphere. Your meditation with movement leads our family sa
fely home, and loving you is like wearing a crown of light. I see life through you each moment, until the next, when we begin again. Thank you for giving me the miracle I have prayed for since I was a little girl, our children . . .
Maxwell, my first born, an arc of God’s light surrounds you so bright, my fierce natural born leader. Thank you for elevating my intention and faith every night with your sweet prayers for the lonely who need God’s hugs, the animals to find homes, the doctors to save lives, the country to live in peace, the firefighters to be brave, and for the mean people who hurt others to feel loved. Your innocence is depth, and your spirit is power. Mommy promises to lasso the stars and pull them straight into your heart every time God turns down the lights. I love you.
Ace, my only son, Mom’s Cancerian soulmate, I get you. I understand you as much as I do myself. And then throw in the best characteristics of your daddy . . . You are a mastermind of observation, patience, mystical powers, intuition, gratitude, resilience, and explosive love that will indeed last a lifetime. Thank you for always saying you love me more, but I can promise you: No way, no how, bud. I wish I could give you everything you want in your childhood, but Mommy isn’t getting you a Komodo dragon. Your imagination will take you wherever your beautiful heart desires, my Home Run King. There is nothing you can’t do. I love you × infinity. Top that! I’m sure you will try.
Birdie: You, my baby girl, were chosen by God to reunite your mommy to the melody of life. In return, I will sing with open wings, giving all that I have inside me. Your life was an unexpected treasure I now can’t imagine living without. The moment I felt you flutter around, I knew that your presence would claim the sky, with your head in the stars and your feet on the ground. You gave me strength as I carried you throughout the creation of this book. First in my heart, then within me, and at last in my arms. When I held you, you looked at me with a smile, your hand held mine and I knew, somehow, we had met before . . . I dreamed you into life.
About the Author
JESSICA SIMPSON is a musician, actress, entrepreneur, philanthropist, and author. In 2005, she launched the Jessica Simpson Collection, now a billion-dollar global company and the most successful celebrity licensing brand in history. She lives with her husband and three children in Los Angeles, California.
Discover great authors, exclusive offers, and more at hc.com.
Copyright
The names and identifying characteristics of some of the individuals discussed throughout this book have been changed to protect their privacy.
OPEN BOOK. Copyright © 2020 by Sweet Kisses, Inc. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse-engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.
FIRST EDITION
Cover photograph by Russell James
Cover design by Brittany Collins
Additional images © Cat_arch_angel/Shutterstock (bird); © Fierman Much/Shutterstock (torn paper)
Diary entries courtesy of the author
Digital Edition JANUARY 2020 ISBN: 978-0-06-289998-9
Version 12192019
Print ISBN: 978-0-06-289996-5
About the Publisher
Australia
HarperCollins Publishers Australia Pty. Ltd.
Level 13, 201 Elizabeth Street
Sydney, NSW 2000, Australia
www.harpercollins.com.au
Canada
HarperCollins Publishers Ltd
Bay Adelaide Centre, East Tower
22 Adelaide Street West, 41st Floor
Toronto, Ontario, M5H 4E3
www.harpercollins.ca
India
HarperCollins India
A 75, Sector 57
Noida
Uttar Pradesh 201 301
www.harpercollins.co.in
New Zealand
HarperCollins Publishers New Zealand
Unit D1, 63 Apollo Drive
Rosedale 0632
Auckland, New Zealand
www.harpercollins.co.nz
United Kingdom
HarperCollins Publishers Ltd.
1 London Bridge Street
London SE1 9GF, UK
www.harpercollins.co.uk
United States
HarperCollins Publishers Inc.
195 Broadway
New York, NY 10007
www.harpercollins.com
Open Book Page 33