by Alexa Aston
The earl glared at Elysande. “I tell you, my lady, you’ll be sorry for your bold words. You will bend to my will when I take you to wife. I know the king—”
“As do I and my wife,” Geoffrey interrupted. “We’re close friends with King Edward and Queen Philippa. Our daughter fosters in their royal household. I guarantee that they’ll listen to our counsel regarding this situation a thousandfold over your words.” His eyes narrowed. “Make sure you never come near Hopeston and my sister and nieces ever again or you’ll live to regret it.”
Lord Ingram turned beet red, fuming in rage. Without a word, he turned and fled the great hall.
Chapter 9
Elysande’s mind wandered as the priest droned on in Latin. The many guests who had assembled at Hopeston now attended Lord Holger’s funeral instead of feasting and dancing at her wedding.
She couldn’t shake the feelings of guilt that weighed her down. They pushed at her as if she’d been trapped under a huge boulder that crushed the life from her. No matter how others tried to reassure her, Elysande knew responsibility for her stepfather’s death rested at her doorstep. She thought again that she should offer up her life to God in service. By entering a nunnery, she could dedicate her remaining time on earth to all things holy. A quiet life of prayer and meditation. One that would, hopefully, win her forgiveness for her sins.
But that would be a world without Michael.
Elysande couldn’t help but think about him. She hadn’t spoken to him since her stepfather’s death two days ago. Though she begged God for forgiveness while in constant prayer, her thoughts would turn to the dark, handsome knight. She could feel his strong arms about her. His mouth covering hers. Her hands roaming the hard, muscled chest.
God must not think her very contrite for her sins if she couldn’t concentrate without her thoughts turning to Michael’s image over and over. Giving Michael up might be the exact penance God required from her.
Was she strong enough to follow through?
She looked down at her hands. One rested in her mother’s, their fingers locked together. Avelyn held Elysande’s other hand in comfort. What must her mother be feeling now? She had lost not one, but two husbands. Elysande knew both marriages had been arranged, but at least her parents had been fond of one another, if not in love. As far as her mother’s relationship with Lord Holger? It seemed a matter of convenience. The marriage had given Lady Mary and her two daughters a roof over their heads after a male relative inherited her father’s title and demanded they vacate the estate. Elysande had rarely seen her mother and stepfather engaged in conversation together. She hoped their lack of personal involvement might make this time easier on her mother.
The mass ended. Both she and Avelyn nodded graciously to those who conveyed their sympathy. Her mother made a few comments to the gathered mourners, thanking them for their kind words in such a time of loss. Elysande wondered if a funeral mass would be held for poor Hendry. She found she’d thought of him more in the past few days than she had in the four years since their betrothal. It pained her that his father had been so brusque and unfeeling regarding his only child’s death.
Michael stepped forward briefly, along with several knights that had come from Kinwick. He offered few words, but his eyes said all. Elysande knew he now believed her free to pursue. But she thought otherwise. She needed to atone for her sins.
Even though she wished that she could spend the rest of her life with him.
The last of those in attendance filed from the chapel. Only she, Avelyn, and her mother remained. Mary gathered them to her. Elysande relished the comfort of her mother’s arms about her.
“I love you, my darling girls. I’m grateful I have you by my side in such a difficult time.”
“What will happen to us, Mother,” asked Avelyn, “now that Lord Holger is gone? And Lord Ingram.” Her sister shuddered. “I’ll never like that man. Never.”
“Don’t trouble yourself over him, lamb,” Mary said. “Even if he writes to the king, I believe your uncle, Geoffrey, will take care of things. As it is, both Geoffrey and I have sent missives to King Edward to inform him of the situation. He is on summer progress, so it might be a few weeks before they catch up to him and we receive a reply.”
She hugged them tightly. “So for now, we won’t worry. I suggest we return to the great hall. A lovely meal awaits us. I saw no need for such a large amount of food to go to waste. Though we aren’t celebrating Elysande’s wedding, at least we can enjoy each other’s company and good food and wines.”
They returned to the keep. Elysande ate a few bites each time her mother looked in her direction, but she left the rest of her food untouched on the trenchers. Nothing seemed appetizing. She decided to slip away and contemplate her future.
It seemed natural to turn toward the stables, her haven in times of trouble. She visited with Morningstar and Happy. The foal grew sturdier with each passing day. She returned to the keep and avoided the great hall and its many guests. Instead, she decided to go up to her bedchamber and lie down. Mayhap the solitude would help her confused heart.
She moved down the empty stone corridor. As she passed the room given to her uncle and aunt, she heard their voices. Elysande paused as she overheard her name in conversation. The door was ajar. Her curiosity got the better of her.
“Elysande needs a change of scenery, Geoffrey. She’s been traumatized by Holger’s death. I want her to come back with us to Kinwick.”
“I’m not sure if that’s wise, my love. You know of the deep feelings between her and Michael. Elysande seems at a crossroads. I don’t know if being in close proximity to Michael is the best thing for her now.”
“She is a wounded bird. And you know how I take those in.”
Geoffrey chuckled. “Indeed, I do.”
“Think of it. All she has been through. She lost her beloved father. She moved away from everything she knew to come to Hopeston. She had the trauma of a forced betrothal, only to learn of her fiancé’s death a day before their wedding. Then she almost had to marry that horrid Lord Ingram—and she witnessed the abrupt death of her stepfather.” Merryn paused. “Not to mention falling hopelessly in love in the midst of all that turmoil. Elysande needs time to heal, Geoffrey. Kinwick is the place for that to occur. Not some nunnery that would choke all the joy from her.”
Her aunt’s words made sense. She could escape the shadows of death that seemed to linger at Hopeston. Visit her cousins at their home. Get a new perspective while she figured out the dilemma she faced.
Elysande tapped at the door and nudged it open. The sympathetic look Merryn gave her made Elysande rush to her aunt. She fell into her arms and clung to her. Kissing Merryn’s cheek, she turned and hugged her uncle, Geoffrey.
She saw the triumphant look in Merryn’s eyes as she turned to her husband. “I’ll write the king and let him know that Elysande is under your protection, my lord. I’m sure he’ll approve of you stepping in.”
“Thank you both,” Elysande told them. “I don’t know what to say. You’re showing me great kindness in my time of trouble.”
“This is only temporary,” Geoffrey warned. “The king may have someone in mind for you to marry. The same could hold true for your mother and Avelyn, too.”
But for now I’ll be safe.
And if she saw more of Michael? That might help her, as well.
Elysande looked to her uncle. “May I bring my horses?”
Geoffrey burst out into laughter. “You really do have de Montfort blood in you.”
*
Michael downed the remainder of his ale. Food held no interest for him. He’d spent two days going crazy with worry over Elysande. Raynor had found him and shared the news of Lord Holger’s death and Lady Mary’s refusal to complete any wedding contracts, despite Lord Ingram’s insistence.
But Elysande had remained closeted in her bedchamber until today’s funeral mass.
He wished he could have time alone with her. He’d heard t
alk of how Holger had dropped dead as they argued and that Elysande blamed herself. Michael had even cornered Lady Avelyn and pulled from her that Elysande’s guilt had her talking of retreating to a nunnery to atone for her role in her stepfather’s death.
If he didn’t feel so desperate, he might have laughed. No one with such zest for life—much less incredible beauty—should be locked away from the world and forced to her knees multiple times a day in hours of prayer and penance.
Yet in a way, Michael understood how Elysande felt. It had been much the same with him. As a boy, guilt blanketed him every time his mother suffered another beating at the hands of his father. Though it usually occurred behind locked doors, Michael believed he should be able to prevent his father from acting in such a manner.
More guilt had rushed through him when he fled Sandbourne and cut his father from his life, knowing that he abandoned his mother. The only comfort he drew came from picturing her in the safe haven of a nunnery, far from her husband’s fists and feet.
Michael thought of her often, wondering which convent she’d been taken to. He prayed to Christ Almighty at mass each morning that he would be able to locate her and bring her home to spend her final years at Sandbourne once he became the earl. He would make up for the lost years they’d spent apart.
Time would heal Elysande’s emotional wounds. He must give her that gift before he declared his undying love and devotion to her and ask Lady Mary for her hand in marriage. So he’d avoided searching for Elysande—for now.
The time drew near for their departure, though. He thought they might leave for Kinwick as soon as tomorrow. Mayhap he should seek her out and at least have a private goodbye between them.
“You haven’t heard a word I’ve said.”
Michael’s head popped up as a hard fist punched him playfully on his shoulder.
Raynor Le Roux shook his head. “’Tis a woman who has you in misery, my friend. Believe me, I know of such things.” He summoned a serving wench over and had her refill their cups.
Michael greedily downed the cool liquid. “Did Lady Beatrice cause you such misery?” Michael had met Raynor’s wife when he accompanied the de Montforts on a visit to Ashcroft shortly after the first Le Roux child’s birth. “She seemed like an angel. I can’t imagine Lady Beatrice causing you any suffering or unhappiness.”
His old friend’s face took on a wistful look that surprised Michael. “Everything is different now that I have found my Beatrice. I won’t tell you of the many obstacles that kept us apart and put me in such a low state. Thank the Heavens we faced them together.” Raynor paused. “Marrying Beatrice was the best thing I have ever done, for our love grows stronger with each passing day. I only wish she could have accompanied me to Hopeston.” Raynor finished the ale and set his cup down.
“There you are, Michael.” Geoffrey de Montfort came to stand next to their table. “We’ll leave tomorrow morning after we break our fast. Be sure the men are ready to travel.”
“Aye, my lord. I’ll see to it now.”
Geoffrey paused. “I should also tell you that my niece, Elysande, will accompany us back to Kinwick. Lady Merryn feels a change of scenery might do the girl some good after all that has passed.”
His words shocked Michael to the core.
Elysande. At Kinwick.
Suddenly, Michael wanted to leap on the table and dance with joy. Instead, he kept his face blank as he had so many times when he’d been teased by others.
“Will Lady Elysande ride one of our extra mounts or take a horse from the Hopeston stables?”
Geoffrey frowned. “She asked if she could bring her horses with her. The more I think about it, I believe they should remain behind.”
“You’re right, my lord,” Michael agreed. “Kinwick is too far for the foal to travel so soon after his birth. And the dam must remain behind to nurse. I’m sure Lady Elysande isn’t thinking straight. She’s had much on her mind.”
“Then go find her and convince her we must leave mother and babe behind,” Geoffrey suggested. “Better yet, find some groom first and have him promise to coddle the pair. ’Twill reassure her if you arrange that before you speak with her.”
Curiosity got the better of him. “How long will the lady reside at Kinwick?”
“That’s for my niece to decide. Frankly, her idea of locking herself away in a nunnery is not what my sister wants. We need to persuade Elysande during her time at Kinwick to make the right choice.” A ghost of a smile crossed the nobleman’s face. “I know you’re eager to step up and change her mind. Especially since her circumstances have changed since we first arrived.”
“Aye, my lord. I want to give her time, though.”
Geoffrey nodded. “Just as her horses need time to come to full strength, so does my niece. Merryn and I are hopeful she’ll change her mind about becoming a nun—and we’d be happy for you to help in that process. In fact, Merryn is counting upon it.”
He placed a hand on Michael’s shoulder. “My wife is a lovely woman, but you do not want to displease her and face her wrath.”
Michael broke out in a smile. “I promise I’ll do my best and see to it that the situation is resolved to everyone’s advantage.”
“Good man.” Geoffrey walked away.
As Michael rose eagerly to his feet, he caught the wide smile on Raynor’s face.
“Now I see what troubled you, my friend. Good luck to you in your quest to capture the lady’s heart. I can tell she has already captured yours.”
“She has, indeed, my lord. Please give my best to Lady Beatrice.”
Michael went to find a groom. He’d grease the man’s pockets with a few gold coins to guarantee Morningstar and Happy would be taken care of in good measure.
He exited the great hall with a spring in his step.
Elysande was coming to Kinwick.
Chapter 10
Elysande watched as the rider her uncle had sent out returned. The knight headed straight to his liege lord. They spoke briefly before he rode off in the direction he originally came from.
“We’ll make camp up ahead,” Geoffrey told them. He called for two of his men to hunt for some small game to supplement what that had brought from Hopeston.
“May I go with them, Father?” Ancel asked eagerly.
Geoffrey nodded. The trio spurred their horses on as the rest of the party continued south on the road.
Merryn turned to Elysande. “Another reason I’m glad that you’re coming for a visit to Kinwick.” She tilted her head in Alys’ direction. “The twins used to do so much together. I think Alys misses those days.”
Elysande looked at her young cousin, who did seem a bit forlorn as she watched her brother ride off without her.
“I’ll enjoy spending time with Alys. She’s promised to teach me something about herbs and potions.”
Merryn laughed. “Alys is eager to show off her knowledge. And I miss having her with me when I prepare my concoctions.”
“So you also know about herbs? I thought Alys might’ve learned about them at court.”
“I soaked up every bit of knowledge I could from Sephare. She was the healer at Wellbury, where I grew up. I have a small room where I prepare my herbs and flowers and store them. As mistress of Kinwick, I’m often called upon to help with the sick or birthing of babes. Alys has been my shadow in these endeavors from the time she could walk.”
Elysande glanced back at Alys. Her young cousin was conversing with Michael as she had much of the day. Elysande noticed how both Alys and Ancel had ridden close to the knight’s side as they journeyed to Kinwick. Michael had listened more than he’d spoken, but she could tell he enjoyed talking with the children.
What had surprised her more was that Baby Hal insisted upon riding with Michael. Geoffrey had helped Merryn mount Destiny and then handed the boy up to her. They’d barely ridden beyond the gates of Hopeston when Hal began squirming in his mother’s lap. He held his hands out and kept calling, “Michael! Michael!
” Finally, her uncle stopped and asked if Michael would take on the rambunctious tyke. He readily agreed and Hal had been content to sit in the knight’s lap and babble away—whether Michael was listening to him or not.
She found her heart touched by his ease with the three de Montfort children. Elysande knew Michael would be a caring father.
And she wished he could be the father of her babes.
There, she’d finally formed the thought that had lingered in her mind all day. Lying to herself did no good. She wanted this man—in every way possible. She wanted to marry him and warm his bed. Give birth to his children. Share a life with him, the good along with the bad.
Was that asking too much?
Elysande didn’t know.
The more miles they traveled from Hopeston, the more she felt her burden of guilt being lifted away. True, she’d argued vehemently with her stepfather, but both her mother and Avelyn insisted Lord Holger’s death had nothing to do with their harsh words aimed at one another. She realized Lord Holger was not a young man. He was vastly overweight and usually red in the face despite little exertion on his part. She supposed he could have collapsed and died at any moment. It just happened to be one in which they’d been arguing.
Elysande sent up another prayer of thanks that she was free to travel to Kinwick. Her mother could have gone ahead and honored her late husband’s wishes and shipped Elysande off with Lord Ingram as her new husband, keeping her in the same family, albeit with the father instead of the son. Instead, Lady Mary had stood firm and sent that loathsome nobleman back to the north.
Her mother didn’t pressure her in any manner regarding the future, though Elysande had mentioned her idea of penance as a nun. Lady Mary merely told her daughter to enjoy her visit with her uncle and aunt and to use the opportunity to get to know her young cousins. She would be welcomed back at Hopeston when she was ready to return.