Eirne sighs. “You sound so sure, Brocc. I am full of doubt. Full of fear. Surely a queen should not doubt herself.”
“I don’t doubt you, Eirne. You will be a fine mother. But . . .”
She sits up abruptly, shaking off my arm. “But what?”
“It’s all right to feel sad sometimes,” I tell her. “It’s all right to weep. It’s all right to worry. If you can, just let it pass. The sun will rise again tomorrow. You will still be surrounded by love and hope and music, my queen. We will share your burdens. We will tread the path with you, whatever it brings. You won’t be left on your own. I promise.”
Eirne lies down again, her head on my shoulder, her arm across my chest. She presses close against me, like a child seeking warmth. Gradually her breathing slows, her eyelids close, and she is asleep.
I am wide awake. I hear my own words in my mind, confident, sure, strong. I wish that was all I felt. I wish I was like Liobhan, whose strength and hope are always with her, even in the darkest times. It is just as well I have been robbed of my singing voice until after the child is born. Every bright tune would be underlain with darkness; every sweet song would have its shadows. Every comic ditty would bear a sting in the tail. Deep down within me, there is doubt. There is fear—for my wife, for my child, for my clan. And something more, something I could not confess to anyone. Seeing Liobhan again opened my eyes. And my heart is riven, torn between that world and this. Between that family and this.
I lay my hand gently against Eirne’s belly, where the small swell of our unborn child is now quite visible. Little one. My son. My daughter. What path will you tread? All around are thorns, monsters, shadows. Oh, how can I keep you safe?
I draw a deep breath and whisper into the stillness of the lamplit chamber. “I will be the father you need. I will be strong, wise, and good like the father who raised me. This I swear with heart and spirit, forever and always.”
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
This book could not have come to fruition without the assistance of many people along the way. Heartfelt thanks to the team at Pan Macmillan Australia: Claire Craig for continuing to support my work through the ups and downs, Brianne Collins for her insightful editing, and Julia Stiles for the meticulous copyedit. A big thank-you also to the US team at Penguin Random House: Anne Sowards, Miranda Hill, and the copyediting staff, for a thorough and thoughtful job.
To my agent, Russell Galen, and the team at Scovil Galen Ghosh Literary Agency, thank you for your excellent work on my behalf and your ongoing support. Gratitude to Mélanie Delon for another amazing cover.
Special thanks to friend and fellow writer Aiki Flinthart, author of Fight Like a Girl, for her invaluable assistance with fight scenes.
Photo by Sean Middleton
Juliet Marillier was born and educated in Dunedin, New Zealand, a town with strong Scottish roots. She has had a varied career that includes teaching and performing music. Juliet now lives in a historic cottage in Perth, Western Australia, where she writes full-time. She is a member of the druid order OBOD. When not writing, Juliet looks after her small crew of rescue dogs. She is the author of the Blackthorn & Grim novels, including Den of Wolves and Tower of Thorns, and the Sevenwaters series. Juliet’s historical fantasy novels and short stories are published internationally and have won numerous awards.
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A Dance with Fate Page 46