by Ella Edon
"It would be best if we have tea. You English say tea soothes the soul. Let's see how that works for us now."
Arthur glanced at Katherine. She did the same to him, but they followed the Dowager Marchioness without another word. Arthur knew deep down, that what the Dowager Marchioness had to say was no good.
They followed her into the study. He walked behind Katherine, careful with his steps, silence trailing after them. When Mr. Stewart placed the tray of tea-things on the table, Arthur knew that it was a waste. He knew the tea would get cold and no one would have to touch it.
Katherine stood away from him, by the shelf. He sat by the desk, gazing at the Dowager Marchioness.
"Has something happened, Mother?" Katherine questioned, moving close to the Dowager.
The Dowager Marchioness stared at her, then at Arthur. She clenched her teeth and nodded slowly. "Katherine, there's a rumor all around town. These rumors started for quite some time, among all of the servants and they moved quickly, but it seems that one Lady heard from her servant, and now the whole ton knows."
Arthur sank down into his seat. Somehow, he just knew what the Dowager Marchioness was about to say next. Her pitiful glances, her sighs.
"What is it, Mother? What had gone wrong? What are the rumors? "
"I should have seen it all along." The Dowager Marchioness shook her head. "I should have."
"Seen what, Mother? You’re scaring me." Katherine stopped turning to Arthur at intervals, then. Perhaps she had figured it out, then. Perhaps she was as scared as he was that if they looked at each other again, the shock would be too much to bear. Because they pretended not to know what the Dowager Marchioness was talking about, when they both already knew.
"You've been having an affair with Lord Bowmount, Katherine. And the whole ton knows. Do you know what that means? That you have ruined any opportunity you have of getting a decent suitor."
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Darlene had once looked at her necklace and said, softly. "My Lady, I have never seen this one on you. It looks beautiful."
Katherine remembered looking down at it and smiling. Now, as she sat alone in her bed chamber, thinking about everything the Dowager Marchioness had said, she wondered if she had given herself away to Darlene that day. Because her maid’s gaze had lingered on Arthur’s gift.
The questions filled her head. How did it get out? How did everyone find out about herself and Arthur? The Dowager Marchioness had not even called her aside to ask if the rumors were true. By merely looking at her, she had known.
Katherine tossed her duvet aside and groaned. This was not how it was supposed to be. This wasn't. She didn't want to be labeled a mistress. Never. Oh, her poor parents. They would be disappointed. Her father, especially. She paced the room, unable to get out of it. How had it gotten out? How had she let it all get this far?
After the Dowager Marchioness revealed the rumor, she had fled the study, unable to look Arthur in the face. This was exactly what she had been trying to avoid. Being caught. Being judged. She didn't know if it was possible to see anyone ever again. The shame she felt was more than she could even imagine. All of Somerset knew about herself and Arthur. Nothing was hidden. There was no way around the rumor, and worse, she had been warned.
A knock on her door startled her. Perhaps it was the Dowager Marchioness, coming to find a solution to the problem.
She rushed to the door and opened it, eager to speak, but froze when she saw Arthur, standing there, his brows raised.
"Arthur —"
"Katherine." His smile was slow and sad.
"You can't be here. If we are seen, it — the rumors will be proven true."
"It's almost noon, Katherine. Won't you come out today? " His voice was pleading, tired. He looked sad. She closed her eyes and shook her head. She turned and walked towards her window.
"I'm afraid to see the judgement in all of their faces, Arthur. After what I've done, the ton will judge me. Everyone already does. But to see it, that— I cannot bear."
She heard the sound of his footsteps, and felt his presence surrounding her. He touched her shoulder and urging her to turn and face him. He smiled at her, a smile so bright, she knew that it was real. He only wanted to lighten her spirits. "Katherine. We are in this together. And we will find a solution to this —"
"What possible solution could there be? I don't think I want to stay in Somerset anymore. I can't bear all of this. "
The hurt she saw on his face was real. He hid it away so quickly, she barely saw it. He did the most unexpected thing, then. He kissed her chastely, then said, "Just because people are talking, it cannot stop you from having a meal, Katherine. Step out of your chamber for only a moment, please."
She sighed, but she took his hand tentatively and walked out of the room. It was quiet between them as they made their way downstairs. His hand held hers firmly, leading her slowly, and certainly. This gentleman who had made her laugh, smile, who had shown her so many new things, who had taught her so much in so little time— he was fearless to be seen with her, even in the wake of all the rumors.
Her heart reached out to him. He was everything she could have ever wanted. The way he cared for her was so sweet. He made her feel delicate but strong. But even as she enjoyed his possessiveness and willpower, she couldn't bring herself to walk in front of everyone, holding hands. It would only make the rumors worse. She slipped her hand away from his. He stilled. He looked at her, but she looked away. She didn't have the courage to tell him what he already knew. It wasn't right for them to be seen together. Not now.
He nodded curtly and walked ahead of her. She stood by the staircase, unmoving, confused. When she heard the click of the study door, she breathed out in relief and walked on — to the dining room.
* * *
Arthur walked into the foyer with his briefcase in hand. His hat was placed on his head and he looked at her intently. Katherine rose, laid down the book she had been reading and walked over to him.
"You're leaving."
He nodded once. "I have an appointment today. I must hurry before I miss my client."
Katherine nodded. Arthur nodded as well. He hesitated for a moment, and she was glad for his hesitation. She rose immediately and walked over to him. She looked around discreetly to see if anyone was close by. Seeing no one, she found the courage to speak.
"Arthur, the news has taken a toll on me. This has tarnished my reputation before all. Me, a mistress. I do not want you to feel that my wish to keep an appropriate distance in the open eye means that I am pushing you away." She gazed steadily into his blue eyes. "I am not. I'm simply wrapping my head around everything. "
Arthur set his suitcase on the table and took her face in his hands. "I want you to know, Lady Bowmount, that irrespective of what happens, you have me and I have you."
Her heart soared at his words. He was there for her, no matter what. It made her giddy and new. It was then that she realized how deeply she had fallen for him. She had fallen for him so hard that even the rumors did not bring her to leave his side, to save what was left of her pride. She was in love with him. The realization stilled her. Did he feel the same way? What if he wanted a younger lady as his wife? What if he didn't want a woman who had already been married and had a child? What if he didn't want her enough to... to want to spend forever with her?
As the questions ran through her head, Arthur kissed her cheek, picked his briefcase and ducked his head. She smiled a little, but it didn't reach her eyes. She loved him; it was a great realization. However, it felt as though she had taken up a burden rather than discovered something beautiful.
He walked out of the dining room, and out of the house. She did not stop herself from staring at the place where he had been standing. And it was where she was still standing when Mr. Stewart opened the front door and her parents walked in, their faces marred with rage.
"Katherine! You've finally done it. You've dragged our reputable name through the mud!" her fathe
r barked. His hands flexed as he did. He was furious, his eyes wild. "You've thrown away everything that you've been taught. How could you do this to us?"
Her mother had been crying—her eyes were red, her cheeks were tear-stained.
To Katherine’s surprise, her brother James stood behind them. His gaze locked with hers and she saw it all in their eyes. The judgement. But James knew how to keep his temper in check.
"This discussion would be better held in the drawing room," James suggested. He walked beside the Duchess of Somerset, holding her arm gently, like she was fragile. He guided her to the drawing room, while Mr. Stewart was left to trail behind them cautiously, on the off-chance that his services were required. Katherine followed behind them quietly.
When they were all inside the drawing room, the door was firmly closed, it was her brother who spoke. But as always, he was calm, with only his jaw twitching and his hands emphasizing.
"You've brought shame on Somerset Castle, Katherine. You've done something outrageous and it has ruined our name!" James said. "What were you thinking?"
Her father laughed sarcastically. "If she were even thinking at all. We warned you about this, asked that you come home to us. But you didn't listen; you never listen. Look now what the ton is saying about you. I knew it would come to this. Which was why I had asked that you come home, months ago. But your stubbornness has led to your downfall."
"I hope he intends to wed you after all this!" James hissed.
She stilled. Their words rang in her ears. James spoke again, this time, he wasn't asking a rhetorical question, he was asking for her to respond.
"I hope he plans to make a decent woman of you, Katherine. I hope he plans to wed you. Surely, he knows the rumors are spreading like wildfire, so he should know that the only solution to this is marriage."
Everyone gazed at her, waiting for her response. Arthur had not asked for her hand in marriage. He hadn't even said he loved her. Their gazes held questions, questions she didn't have an answer to. She didn't want them to hate Arthur because of something both of them had done. She didn't want them to hate him at all. So, she decided it was best that she defended him.
"I do not wish to be wed so soon. I haven't forgotten Victor. It... It would be too soon to take vows —"
"That be damned, Katherine. All of Somerset knows your name, yet you stand here, spewing nonsense?" Her father stepped forward. He was close to her now. Her mother was sobbing softly now, her tears flowing freely. Katherine thought she'd faint from all the accusations, her mother's tears, their disappointment in her. She held her breath, letting their words float in the air. She felt so light and so faint. Everything was blurry.
She heard her name then, and just before she fainted, she heard the door open. Through the blurry gaze, she saw the Dowager Marchioness run to her just as darkness overwhelmed.
Chapter Thirty
"I do not wish to be wed so soon. I haven't forgotten Victor. It... It would be too soon to take vows...
He had been standing outside the drawing room when she uttered those words. Like a whirlwind, the words made him stumble back and he ran out of the manor.
While he was riding off to work, he saw her family in their carriage, on their way towards Bowmount Hall. He had stopped his horse, but he had been unsure of going back to be there with Katherine. He didn't know if it would make it all worse or better. Despite his doubts, he knew they would be angry at her. He didn't want her to bear the brunt of their rage alone. So, he turned his horse towards Bowmount Hall, after a few moment’s thought.
On his arrival, Mr. Stewart simply pointed him towards the drawing room. The man had been unable to speak. It was then he heard a gentleman's voice, questioning her. He stopped abruptly by the door, feeling that the situation seemed very intimate. He didn't know if it was right for him to intrude. Then he heard her response and it had knocked air out of him for a second. It was then that he walked out.
He should have known, after Mary, he should have known that maybe a life of forever was not meant for him. Katherine didn't love him. But what about his own feelings? His love for her?
He pulled his fingers through his hair as he paced in his office. What would he do? He pressed his lips in a thin line and shook his head again. A knock on the door called his attention. He turned to see his assistant, Baldwin.
Arthur raised a brow at him. The boy simply raised both his hands and said. "My Lord, there's a Lady here to see you. She claims that you know her. Lady Mary, she calls herself."
Before Baldwin could finish his introduction and wait for Arthur's order, Mary walked in. He stilled. Perhaps he was dreaming. She wore a yellow dress, and as he had always said, it complemented her red hair. But for a second, he wondered if yellow would suit Katherine's golden hair. She would let it fall on her back, and then she would ride on her white horse and smile back at him as he followed behind. He smiled at his imagination.
But a small sound called him out. He averted his attention. Mary smiled at him. He saw that her eyes were not bright, as they had once been. She looked pale. Her hair was, as always, neatly pinned in place. Her dress was bright. But still, her eyes were clouded, and she looked at him like she had never seen him before. Before he could react, she rushed over to him and flung her arms around him. Her tears came thereafter, along with loud sobs.
"Mary, what are you doing here? How did you find me?"
Mary pulled away from him. She rubbed her tear-stained cheeks and shook her head. When she was calm, she sighed and said, "Oh, Arthur. It's been so long. But I do know where to go when I'm in dire need. I know the people I can trust to help me. "
"Help you, how? What is going on Mary? Where is your husband? Aren't you wed to the Earl?" He didn't mean to sound so bitter, but he did.
He recalled what had happened with Mary. Mary had been his intended ever since she turned eighteen. He had seen her at her debut and they had fallen for each other. He made it very clear to her that he intended to wed her. She claimed she loved him.
But he had been surprised, when not long after that, her engagement to an Earl was announced at a ball her father organized. Arthur had been just about to ask her father for his formal permission to court her. Mary had told him that there would be no other.
So, the engagement had stunned him. When he approached her, she had refused to speak to him. Especially when her husband to be was right by her side. It had broken him.
He only realized then that it was because his family had no title. And that he was not to inherit any, anytime soon. Why she told him that she loved him even when she didn't, baffled him. He had left her to be then. He never looked for her after then. And she didn't look for him either. He never saw her again until he left Flitwick. Now he wondered what she was doing in his office.
Arthur raised both brows at her. "Mary..."
"Terrible things have happened, Arthur. Things that I cannot explain. It's been such a long journey, traveling from Flitwick to here. Your mother told me where to find you, Arthur."
"What terrible things have happened, Mary?"
Mary sighed. "I decided to leave Augustus. I couldn't walk down the aisle, pretend to love him."
"What are you saying, Mary?"
"I'm saying that I left Flitwick to come all the way here. To look for you."
"Mary, whatever happened in the past is over. Return to your betrothed. There's nothing here for you."
Mary shook her head and stepped nearer to him. "That's not true. You are here, and you are enough."
Arthur scoffed. If he was enough, she wouldn't have left him for the rich, elderly Earl. But she had. Even though quite some time had passed, the memory was still fresh.
He shook his head and gazed into her eyes coldly. "You chose the Earl, and I have accepted it. It's been a long time now. Why come now? All while I was in Flitwick, trying to forget everything, you never came. Now, when I'm halfway across England, with a title of my own, you've suddenly decided that you choose me? "
&
nbsp; Mary sighed. "My parents want me to wed Augustus. They want me to have a secure future. They want me to wed a man who has land and property, and whose future is certain."
Arthur laughed dryly. Of course. He had known all of that, had he not? He knew that not just her parents wanted it, but Mary also. She was obsessed with being rich and remaining highborn.
"Return to Flitwick, Mary. There's nothing for you here. I have found another and I intend to wed her soon," he said the last part in a bid to send her away. But as he said it, he thought of how true those words were. He wanted to wed Katherine. He wanted to wake up every day with her by his side. He wanted to wake up to her smiling. He wanted her love. Her, forever.
Maybe she didn't want the same, yet. But he wanted to make her see that she could take the next step with him. He promised himself that he would fight for her. He loved her, and seeing Mary only made him realize that he was willing to risk trying, for Katherine.