A SCANDINAVIAN MOTHER’S “GET UP AND GO OUTSIDE” MANIFESTO
1.There is no such thing as bad weather, only bad clothes.
One of the most useful semi-true parenting sayings to ever come out of Scandinavia, on par with “Fruit is candy.” Use it liberally to get the kids used to playing outdoors in all kinds of weather* from an early age. (*Not to be taken too literally, of course! Thunderstorms, tornadoes, hurricanes, flash floods, life-threatening temperatures, or other types of crazy weather conditions are perfectly valid reasons for staying inside.)
2.Dress for the weather.
A must if you actually decide to enforce #1. If it rains, the kids wear rain gear. If it snows, they wear snowsuits. Pair with appropriate footwear, hat, and waterproof mittens. It’s not rocket science.
3.Fresh air is good for you.
Yup, our parents were right when they told us that getting fresh air every day was good for us. Spending more time outside can reduce the risk for common infections, nearsightedness, vitamin D deficiency, and obesity, as well as lessen symptoms of ADHD, anxiety, and depression. Tip: It works wonders for adults too.
4.Just let them play.
No employer in his right mind will care if your child started reading at age four or seven. Let your preschooler bake mud pies and worry about academics later. Unstructured outdoor play has everything kids need for healthy physical, social, and cognitive development in the early years. Older kids need time to play too; busiest extracurricular schedule by third grade does NOT win.
5.A little dirt won’t hurt.
Our modern indoor lifestyle has made kids too clean and likely triggered an epidemic of immunological disorders. To bring some beneficial germs back into your child’s life, ditch that hand sanitizer and let him sink his hands deep down in dirt. Bonus points for not freaking out if Junior also happens to stick those dirty hands in his mouth.
6.Freedom with responsibility.
Kids need risky play to learn how to assess risk and prepare for adulthood. That doesn’t mean they need to be juggling chain saws, just allowed to engage in some old-school outdoor fun like climbing trees, sliding on frozen puddles, using real tools, and walking to the park without an adult. If our parents could handle it, we can too.
7.Unplug to connect.
The internet is fantastic, and not only because it’s full of funny cat videos and opportunities to play World of Warcraft with strangers. But if we want our kids to keep a foot in the natural world, we need to pry them away from their screens sometimes and do things outdoors as a family. Challenge yourself by leaving your own smartphone at home, or at least putting it in airplane mode.
8.It takes a village.
As a parent, being your child’s only cheerleader for outdoor play can get old. Find some like-minded people and figure out how you can get kids back outside in your community, whether by starting a family nature club, protesting your school’s no-recess policy, or fighting overzealous homeowners’ association rules.
9.We are one with nature.
Children and nature make a really good fit. By immersing kids in the natural world early, we’re increasing the chances of them wanting to take care of it later in life. With a little luck, they’ll do a better job than their parents and grandparents.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
First of all, I would like to thank my agent, Brandi Bowles of Foundry Literary + Media, who saw the potential in my book and enthusiastically took me on as her client after Mollie Glick, who originally signed me, moved on to a new job. I’m also profoundly indebted to my editors at Touchstone/Simon & Schuster: Michelle Howry, who shepherded me through the first chapters, and Meredith Vilarello, who expertly helped me across the finish line. Without your unwavering support, encouragement, and thoughtful input, this book wouldn’t be what it is today.
In addition, I feel extremely privileged to have had David Ebershoff Jr. as my mentor and personal cheerleader from the time I got the idea for this book until it sold. Your advice about the publishing industry as well as your edits of my book proposal were spot-on.
I’m incredibly grateful to my Swedish friends—new and old—and their families, who let me delve into their lives and ask all sorts of personal questions in my search for the heart and soul of the Scandinavian parenting tradition. You know who you are.
Thank you also to the wonderful residents of Äspered and the staff at the school for welcoming me into the community and sharing your thoughts on parenting and education in Sweden. The same goes for the staff at Nora’s preschool, who offered me valuable insights into early childhood education in Sweden. Thanks to you, Nora had the chance to spend her days baking mud pies while I was writing.
I’m indebted to my dedicated and fantastic test readers: Bob and Alinda Dickinson, Kay Hunter, Heather Dent, Linda Gustafsson, Amanda Strawser, and Vanessa Shaw, who gave me valuable feedback in various phases of this project, and Sue White and Jennifer Campbell, who meticulously critiqued the entire book. You all rock.
I would like to thank my mom, Margareta Åkeson, for passing on to me her profound love for this earth. I only wish I would have gotten a sliver of your green thumb as well. My sister, Susanne Lund, has supported me throughout the writing process and believed in this book long before I did so myself. Both of you, and your unwavering idealism, have inspired me beyond words. I’m equally grateful to my dad, Kjell Åkeson, for instilling in me his stellar work ethic and for advising me to follow my heart and pursue a career that I was passionate about. I did, and I have never looked back.
A profound thank-you also goes out to Kyle for letting me take our daughters to Sweden for nearly six months; I appreciate the sacrifices you had to make during the writing of this book.
Lastly, words cannot express the gratitude and love that I feel for my daughters, Maya and Nora. You are the reason why I embarked on this journey, and you continue to inspire me on a daily basis. May you never stop catching caterpillars and collecting random rocks in your pockets.
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