by Kira Graham
Don’t cry. That’s just lame, I tell myself, gulping when she mutters to her hand and shakes her head.
“That was weird, no? At first I thought it’s so you, and I could sleep tighter. Gia’s always got something sly up her sleeve, but now… I don’t know. She’s too quiet, and she’s avoiding me,” Lu murmurs, still talking to her hand.
“Maybe she’s just busy?” I offer like the coward I am.
Tell her!
No, you tell her, I hiss, rolling my eyes because it doesn’t matter who tells her; she’s still going to kill us—me. Dammit. Now I’m talking to myself like I’m two people.
“Oh, please. She’s working for Lei. You know, that hurt my feelings a bit,” she mutters, her lips pouting. “I knew she wasn’t going to get any of the jobs she was interviewing for, but I never thought Lei would offer her a job or that Gia would take it.”
“Well… it’s good, right?” I ask, trying to say something meaningful here because what the fuck do I care what Gia’s doing with her life?
The woman screwed me over monumentally, and it isn’t just about me being afraid of Lu. Maybe I wanted to propose to her. Did anyone ever think of that? Maybe I wanted to get all sappy and romantic and go down on bended knee. A few meters away just in case she reacted badly and tried to kick me in the face—
“Good. Yeah. I guess,” she shrugs, now talking to me and her hand.
Still chewing the lip, though. Sweet Jesus, she’s still chewing on her lip and that’s never a good thing. It’s one of her tells that she’s overthinking and about to come to some conclusion. But at least she isn’t on the Bamboozle thing anymore.
“But, see, I’ve been thinking about why she just upped and quit so fast, and now she’s avoiding me after the cemetery. Which is bullshit. I won us that battle.”
Suuuure you did. In fact it was my uncoordinated ass that won us that battle, and I know this because Cole called me the day after, laughing his ass off about how shit I dance. That wasn’t right but whatever. I’m a great dancer.
“So, all I can assume is, she’s hiding. Now, that isn’t normal for Gia. She doesn’t hide. Well, except for that one time when she cut my Barbie’s hair and got scared right after. We settled it—okay, I settled it after I put one of Mom’s sleeping pills in her juice and drew a dick on her face in Sharpie. That was funny too. She had to go to her ballet recital like that, and Dad cried the whole time she was on stage while people laughed. Best day ever. Maybe she’s just raw because Simon’s not talking to her?” she muses.
Which is true. He isn’t.
“Maybe?” I ask.
Just tell her!
Nope. Not going there on a Saturday morning, I think, looking around. Not when I’m stuck in my apartment with her, a killer cat, and a dog the size of a horse.
“I mean, she’s definitely done something. I know Gia, and her avoiding me means she’s done something bad. Which is going to get her killed. Like when she set me up with Brody. I can’t believe she set me up with that asshole,” she snarls, her eyes growing mean.
“Uh, Lu—”
“Hmm. This is a conundrum,” she sighs, snapping out of it and smiling at me. “Wanna go to the park and walk Luke?”
No. Not even a little. The dog is huge, he has an affinity for squirrels, and anytime we take him out I end up having to pick up his turds. Turds the size of cow pats. I don’t know what she’s feeding that dog, but I’d hazard a guess it’s toxic.
“Sure,” I hear myself saying as I gulp, chickening out so hard even I’m ashamed of myself.
Tomorrow. Definitely tomorrow.
Chapter 17
Louisiana
Something is definitely up with Cameron. Him and Gia, whom he refused to talk to, at all. I know this because we’re at my parents’ place and everyone’s here too, including Gia whom I haven’t seen in at least an hour. I have an inkling that she’s hiding in the basement, but she didn’t even budge when I put the power to the light switches off, so whatever her deal is, it’s bad enough that she’s ignoring her fear of the dark.
Across the living room, Cameron and Connor are whisper-arguing. Do I want to know what that’s about? Not even a little. They’ve hardly spoken at all in the last week—and don’t get me started on Peter either because the guy has been silent as a tomb ever since the cemetery. Kat isn’t talking either, and now that I think about it, people are avoiding me.
Which has me suspicious and narrow-eyed as I watch them all. Mom, even Mom, keeps flitting around and running out of a room when I walk in, and five minutes ago Simon nearly screamed his head off when I popped up next to him and heard him talking about marriage.
The man is a weirdo, I’m telling ya. But it’s not like I didn’t know that. It’s just that the way everyone’s acting right now is so strange.
“You’re looking mighty pissed, kiddo,” Dad says, coming to stand beside me where I’m leaning against the archway into the living room, watching people.
“No; just confused. I have this weird feeling that people are talking about me, but I can’t catch them at it,” I say, my eyes still narrowed because Cameron glances back at me, and I swear the man is sweating.
He doesn’t sweat. Ever. It’s like he’s perfect in every single way, and here I am, having to work so hard just to be non-gross. That’s not easy. I wake up at the crack of dawn and work like a dog, and making time for things like brushing my hair is hard work. And he just gets to be perfect—
“He isn’t perfect,” Dad snorts, chuckling when I sigh and glare at my hand.
They’ve conditioned me like a dog, for God’s sakes. The only reason I’m not having a meltdown is because… I grin and look over at the sofa where Lee’s talking to my aunt Milly, and Dad chortles beside me, his beer belly shaking.
“I still can’t believe you did that,” he laughs, his eyes twinkling while I grin darkly.
It isn’t easy waking up a half-hour early while Cameron mutters at me, and then sneaking out of the apartment so I can break into an ex-nun’s apartment and put blue dye in her face wash. I’m just really good at those kinds of things, and as I stare at Lee, who looks up and scowls at me, my day brightens. Bam, baby! Blue face. And no, I don’t feel a shred of guilt. She isn’t a nun anymore, and she deserves everything she gets after she messed with my mind. Granted, it’s not like I wasn’t strange before, but now I’m talking to myself, and that isn’t an easy place to be when I’m holding in love words for that asshole Cameron.
You have no idea how hard it is for me not to march up to him and demand he tell me he loves me. I mean, he must. I’m wonderful. It would be hard not to fall helplessly in love with me—
“Lu, the man loves you,” Dad groans, laughing when I curse.
“Then he has to say it. I can’t do it first, Dad. He’d win,” I whine, pouting while my dad sighs and closes his eyes as if he’s searching for patience.
“Lu, this isn’t a competition—”
“Everything is a competition.”
“Christ. I’ve created a monster,” he groans, wiping at his face where he’s trying to grow his beard in.
He looks like a hobo with that shit all patchy and gray, but Mom seems to love it so much I walked in on them boning on the kitchen table yesterday. A few things came of that experience, and I’m not happy about it either. Firstly, I am never eating at that table again. There is no amount of antibacterial that can clean that crap—and I’m not just talking about my eyeballs or my soul. Which is broken. I saw my dad’s ass!
Secondly, my mother is a screamer, and that is disgusting. I also saw her naked boobs. I’m never having children if that’s what happens to your tits. It was—I stop thinking about that because I have to. I have a weak stomach.
Thirdly, I am never eating waffles again. They’ve ruined syrup for me. And butter. What kind of monsters do that with butter?
“Lulu! For the love of God, kid. Stop that,” Dad groans, slapping my hand away from my mouth while I whimper. “Love isn�
�t a competition, honey. It’s about emotions—”
“Dad, stop being gross,” I huff.
“I gotta be. You can’t get married if you don’t tell that man you love him, Lu.”
“Married? Oh, my God. I am never doing that. I mean, I told Mom I would stop thinking that way but I was lying through my teeth,” I snort.
Not ever wearing an engagement ring. I just can’t. Not after…
“Girl, stop being an asshole. You gotta get over that shit already. The boy tricked you, yes, but it’s over. You can’t keep holding on to that mess.”
Mess? He asked me to marry him so he could sleep with me and then he made me a laughingstock. What do people not get about that? I had this thing where I was waiting for marriage—I know, it sounds stupid but that’s what I wanted. Brody, that piece of pond scum, made me believe we were in love and then he took my V-card and broke up with me.
I’m not so mad about the actual act so much as I am about having my ass tricked. I can’t believe I fell for that.
“For God’s sakes,” Dad snaps, throwing his hands up and shaking his head. “Love is love. You love someone—you let go of all the shit that happened before. That’s the end of that. You think it was easy for me to fall in love with your ma? Look at her! She’s been wearing the same hairdo for twenty years. But I love her, Lu. I love her, and so nothing else matters. Cameron, he loves you. He has to. He’s one of the only men I have ever met who still sticks with you despite the abuse you rain down on his balls.”
“Uh, he deserved that. He cheated at poker,” I grumble, still feeling slightly guilty because I was a little hard on him when I pounced on him while he was fighting off Jaja.
It wasn’t fair at all. He couldn’t even attempt to cover his balls. I may have a slight problem with conceding defeat. That’s all I’m saying.
“Lu…” Sigh. “Please just cut the kid some slack.”
“Dad—”
“Look, come here,” he groans, pulling me down the hall and into his office.
“Dad—”
“I’m going to tell you something that I shouldn’t, Lu. I promised myself I wasn’t going to get involved, and frankly, I am scared to death right now,” Dad says as he removes a cup from his desk drawer and slides it into his pants, giving it a pat and adjustment before he looks back at me.
I grin a little before I frown because Dad only wears his cup before he tells me something I won’t like.
“You probably shouldn’t tell me anything bad right before the hunt begins,” I warn him, a thrill filling me at the thought because it’s so close now.
I can hardly wait. I’m going to win this thing, finally, and then I’m going to laud it over them all for a good hour before I concede and tell them I want the hunts to continue. I can’t wait. I’m so excited I can hardly contain myself, and to make matters even worse for everyone else, Cameron is loaded and he’s more than willing to cheat and use other people to get us this win. God, is it any wonder why I love that man? He cheats with such ease. Heart cramp.
“I gotta tell ya, Lu. I can’t have Gia sleeping over here anymore because she’s afraid of you,” he sighs, giving me a look when I snicker.
“I knew it! I knew she was hiding something. Is that why she’s hiding in the basement?” I ask, giddy at the thought because I not only shut off the power to the lights down there; I also left her a surprise on the stairs. A surprise I nearly kissed Luke for this morning because he went big. Much to Cameron’s dismay.
“Partly. She’s also hiding down there because Connor is here. Don’t ask. I don’t know. All I heard this morning before she ran down there is that if I told him where she was, she’d kill me in my sleep and desecrate my body with dick tattoos,” he huffs, his mouth twitching.
“Just spit it out already,” I sigh, preparing myself for the worst.
Although what could she have done that would be worse than the time I woke up with her standing over me with hair clippers?
“So, the Bamboozle—”
“I knew it! I knew it was about that stupid game,” I snarl, starting to sweat because I still to this day can’t remember what happened.
Now, that isn’t a huge issue. I was twenty-one once, and I had my fair share of blackout moments, which I do not recommend to anyone out there because they’re dangerous and irresponsible. Unless you have Kat and Gia with you. Then that shit’s just funny. And safe. Above all, always have backup if you’re going to be an idiot. That way you avoid bad things happening to you, ladies. Let’s be clear about that. You’re responsible for your own safety, and if you’re being an idiot around booze and other people without backup, you’re being dumb—
“Lu, would you please stop giving whoever the hell you’re talking to advice about how to not get date-raped?” Dad whines.
“Okay. Sorry. I was just being nice. They need to know, Dad,” I huff, my mouth thinning when he rolls his eyes. “Just tell me. What was Bamboozle about? Did she take a picture of my boobs again and put it on porn sites? Because I don’t even care about that anymore. As long as she doesn’t show my face it doesn’t ma—”
“You got married!” Dad says, blowing out a breath and scuttling behind his desk. “There. I said it. Jesus,” he groans, reaching into his desk drawer for a half-jack and downing a good portion of it before he sighs and slumps down into his chair, breathing as if a huge weight has been lifted off of his shoulders.
I blink. I don’t think I heard that right. No. Definitely not.
“I’m sorry—what?” I ask, keeping my face expressionless and my voice level.
“You got married. Look, we all thought it was just a prank—okay? And Gia was just going to torture you with evidence of it until you snapped and had a breakdown of some kind. That’s all. But then Connor found out she’d actually got a marriage license, and he found the certificate, and then he told Cameron—and that poor boy, he’s deathly afraid to tell you, Lu,” Dad groans, looking sick when I don’t move, don’t speak, and don’t blink.
Uh, no. That isn’t true. It can’t be. It just can’t. I would remember that happening, and I would definitely remember—
“Let me get this straight,” I say slowly, cutting off my thoughts before I lose my mind. “We’re married?”
“Yes,” Dad says, gulping when I suck at my teeth and nod.
“And everyone knows?” I ask softly, so calm I don’t blame him for paling because I’d be scared of me too right now.
“Yes. But Lu—”
“And Cameron knows,” I say just as slowly, a strange calm filling me when Dad nods.
“Yes. Lu, he didn’t know before Connor and Peter spilled the beans, so please don’t kill him. I like the boy. He fits in with this family, and he’s really cool to talk to because he doesn’t judge me for crying. And he’s helping me invest my pension so I can take your mom on an overseas trip one day,” Dad croaks, his mouth working when I nod slowly and hum.
Now, I could get mad. I am mad. Very mad. But what fun would it really be if I went out there and lost it on everyone? I’d just start swinging, and then eventually someone would tackle me and subdue me while other people ran. Most of the time that person is Dad because he starts crying before I can get loose and by that time I feel so bad for him, I can’t kill him. Plus I love him. He’s just so sweet and pathetically emotional.
“Okay,” I say, a plan forming in my mind so that I grin and Dad whimpers, his eyes filling with tears.
“Lu—”
“You’re not telling anyone that I know this, you hear me?” I snarl, narrowing my eyes on him when he lifts the bottle again and glugs, all while his lip trembles.
“Lu, please don’t do anything scary. Dad’s an old man. My heart can’t take it,” he whines.
I’m smiling now because oh, ho, the plans I have. Have I ever mentioned that I am an awesome planner? And I’m patient. I waited three months and worked on the tread of the stairs with such patient slowness that by the time Mom hit the dead spot and it
broke and she fell down it, it came as a huge surprise. I regretted it immediately, though, trust me. My mom doesn’t wear underwear under her nighties. Jesus. That’s one sight I can’t ever unsee.
“Oh, you’ll take it, old man. You’re not saying a word,” I murmur, rubbing my hands together and stopping just short of a cackle because my dad already looks like he’s about to expire. “Not one word.”
Chapter 18
Cameron
“I can’t believe she’s not talking to me!”
“Connor, shut up,” I groan, my stress levels already so high that I cannot deal with another one of his rants.
For a man who’s been very clear about only being friends with Gia, he sure has been whining nonstop about her cold shoulder lately. I personally don’t give a shit. I’ve got my own problems—and I never thought I would say this, but I’ve got the creeps nonstop because Lu’s been really sweet lately. Hell, she barely batted an eyelash when her dad postponed the hunt because he said he needed some time to regroup and de-stress.
I have no idea what the man is stressing about, but I have a feeling it has something to do with what happened when he and Lu snuck off to his office. I can’t say, since Cole just shook his head when I asked, and Lu smiled and blew me off entirely. What I can say is that ever since that day, she’s been acting strangely. For one, she doesn’t sleep over as much. That could be because her bakery is really busy, and I understand her point about it being easier for her to work in the week if she’s at her place instead of staying over at mine and traveling all the way back to her place every morning.
I offered to get her a new store in Manhattan so we could spend more time together, but the woman refused. And didn’t speak to me for a full day after I “tried to throw money at her like a kept woman.” I have no idea where that came from, and I wasn’t going to argue either. I’m snowed in at work with the final phases of this revamp project—and I say final lightly, because there’s still so much to do that I feel like I’m spinning. Feldman also tried to sue me for firing him, and I had to deal with that whole shitshow for two full days before my lawyers made the asshole go away.