by HP Mallory
I didnae know if I were just imagning her lovely voice in my head but I decided to trust her words, all the same. Besom and I shared a connection that allowed us to communicate in the visionary world. How such was happening now, I couldnae say.
I stumbled. I was just loud enough to make the guards’ heads turn ‘round.
“Ah, what the hell, Tido?!” the angel roared, making me headache even worse with another of his poxy, bright lights.
I barely shut me eyes and turned me head to ward off the worst of the flash. The howls I heard behind us indicated Alaire’s bully boys werenae quite so quick nor lucky.
But as surprising as the angel’s trick was for its intended audience, it couldnae compare to the surprise the commander gave us afterwards. He ran right at the angel and scooped him up by the throat.
“Did you actually think someone who stared into the hottest fires of Dis could be blinded by your pitiful illumination?” he demanded as he shook the stookie angel.
Poor wee fellow beat the bastard’s wrists in vain while choking in his grip. I yanked out me sword and ran the blade across the greater imp’s calves in one motion. As expected, the sudden pain dropped him to his knees and he released the angel on his way down.
“Git tae the elevator!” I shouted at the angel while turning me attention to the laptop. The native greater imp and turncoat Retriever were too stunned by the light burst to stop me from cleaving the damned machine in two with a trio of quick, hard strokes. True, the laptop was most likely not the only means they had to reach Alaire. But damned if I could leave it be! Not as long as it allowed them to easily call for reinforcements.
All at once, the captain recovered enough of his wits to whip out a pistol from his side. I once again found meself wishing for Donnchadh’s speed and strength when the imp opened fire on the angel. Judging from the metal ricochet of the shots, he hit everything but his target. But again, I saw nae reason to take chances. Me blade pierced the gun barrel just before I spun ‘round to whack its owner in the face with the flat of me sword.
That knocked him to the ground and I ran past. If time were nae an issue, I’d have buried the sharp blade into his neck. But the patrol he sent out couldnae have failed to hear or see the ruckus by now. We had to depart before they arrived.
Without missing a hitch, the captain dropped his broken gun and paused, pulling another one from the small of his back. At this range, there was nae way he could miss his target and I could scarce afford another crippling injury. Calling on the magic I’d been using to heat meself, I cast another spell to prepare for the shooting.
Everything ‘round me began moving slower, like ‘twas underwater, including the captain. I saw the extended plume of flame as the gun fired. More importantly, I saw the spinning bullet lazily coming right toward me. Ignoring the nasty cold, I deflected the slug with the center of me blade. As the bullet hit the snowy ground to me left, a second shot was fired, aimed at me head.
While I ducked it, a third bullet sliced the air where me chest had previously been but me face now was. I quickly executed a horizontal slice, cutting the lead slug in half, sending one part into the air while the other drove into the ground between me legs.
After that, I started back-pedaling as fast as I could. Even with time slowed, I barely warded off the bullets as I hastily made me way to the elevator. The iciness I’d been avoiding started to bother me again, slowing me down.
Me heels touched the metal floor of the elevator at the same moment that I slipped on the ice above it. I landed hard and flat on me back. One of the bullets whizzed over me face before leaving a shower of sparks on the elevator’s back wall. While me eyes took in the sight, I heard the angel shout out.
“Cooooooooooonaaaaaaaaaaaaaan…”
When time resumed its natural speed, the magic I’d been using had run its course. The stookie angel began talking and I could understand him again.
“Hey, Conan, if you’re done showin’ off your tricks, I could use a little o’ yer bearawn here!”
The last bit of magical assistance took the wind out me sails. All I wanted to do was remain lying upon the floor, especially with so many bullets aimed at us. Upon hearing the distinct click of an empty gun before the captain began cursing, I finally got off me duff.
The angel was pulling the lever in order to move us upward but the hoarfrost upon it suggested he was attempting the impossible. I was out of breath by the time I reached him. I leaned against the lever like an old man leans upon a cane. The angel looked at me and began shaking his head as if he had a piece of meat caught ‘tween his jaws.
“No, no, no, no! Don’tcha lose conk-ness on me, Sasquatch!”
I used the last of me strength to pull meself upright, placing me hands on the lever and pulling hard. I might as well have been trying to fell a great oak with me bare hands. When both of us released the lever, the angel shone his light again as he kicked the stubborn machine.
“Whit are ye…?”
“Fuck it, Tido! I’m already cold an’ those ugly fuckers and the real perty one know we’re here anyways!”
My body responded to the angel’s heat immediately. Me skin felt so relieved that I was ready to sing his praises. But hearing rapid footsteps, there was little time for either of us to enjoy this brief reprieve. Then I realized we werenae the only thing the angel’s aura was heating up—so was the lever. That realization gave me enough energy and strength to grab it again. “One more time, stookie angel! Keep all the light comin’ in!”
This time, I felt the lever begin to budge in the right direction but it still got nae further than halfway. I shut me eyes and yelled at him, “Put all ye got intae that furnace, man!”
The heat radiating from him changed in an instant, going from comfortable to blistering. Me whole body reacted like a roast lamb cooking over a spit. We both shouted a final cry of agony when the lever loosened and returned to its proper position.
With a heavy lurch, the big, old, metal box began rising, knocking us both off our feet just as the angel’s lightshow ended. I could hear shots behind us but none of them were close to hitting home. For just a brief second, me body was grateful for the bone-chilling cold that still surrounded us. Then me body went back to feeling as frozen as the hunks of ice we were leaving behind.
Me eyes hadnae quite cleared away the brightness before I was jarred by a couple of slaps on me face.
“Don’tcha die on me, Tido! I still need ta beat yer ass fer damn near makin’ us the latest victimartyrs o’ demon-o-cide!”
I felt a crooked grin on me face. “With yer constant yappin’, I’d say dyin’s damn near impossible.”
By then, I could see his emaciated face, and he did his best to hide his relief. “Yeah, well, flatteraise won’t git ya off my shit list, Conan.”
I sighed and allowed me muscles tae relax. “Well… will it git me a bit o’ warmth tae guard ‘gainst this cold?”
He rolled his eyes in mock disgust. “Yeah, I guess ya done enough fer that.”
A bit of his light shone again, and this one was much easier on me eyes than the last few flashes. I absorbed the heat like a plant reaching for sunlight. The climb up to the morgue would take a few hours, allowing us plenty of time to recover from our ordeal. A wee bit of food could have sped things along but just escaping from the belly of the Underground City was a decent enough start.
Me mind drifted back to me Lily and the situation she was facing. Could she really be on her way to us? I surely hoped sae because ‘twould mean she had escaped Alaire.
Basking in the warm, welcome glow of her guardian angel, I once again vowed nae to stop until we were reunited with Besom. This time, I did say a prayer. And I prayed to any powers that were listening that I could succeed.
“His ill-strain’d nerves he left.”
-Dante’s Inferno
THREE
LILY
The skies began to change from dark to gray as I was finally leaving the Seventh Circle of The Underground City.
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The euphoria of escaping from Alaire’s castle was long gone though. Now that I was flying on the back of the winged shrew I’d tamed—er, Donnchadh had actually done the taming—I was plagued by a hundred questions floating around my mind like a hurricane.
Were the other Furies just as loyal to me as this one appeared to be?
What would I do when I actually got to the morgue?
Did Alaire command some kind of machine or flying monster that could take us out of the sky? And if so, when would that creature show up because I had to imagine Alaire was in the process of alerting any and every one of his foul minions that I’d escaped.
That last thought had been haunting me for quite a few miles now. But lacking any other signs of pursuit or interference, I thought maybe, just maybe I was on my way to escaping?
I lacked the words to describe what a relief that possibility was. Ever since Alaire had introduced himself to me over the phone while I was in the Dark Wood, the Master of the Underground City always seemed to stay two or three steps ahead of me. No matter how hard I tried to prevent him, he knew exactly how to manipulate me to get what he wanted.
And that was precisely the reason why my body had become a sock puppet for the spirit of an evil, little bitch named Persephone. Luckily, I’d been able to rid myself of Persephone and funny enough, Alaire was just as glad in the end. Be careful what you wish for…
Even so, the price of my freedom was now calculated in the memories of everything Persephone and Alaire did to me while she was at the helm of my body. The ways Alaire had defiled me were memories I couldn’t shake…
His lips all over me.
His fingers inside me.
Alaire inside me…
Every time I remembered the particulars, my stomach dropped and I felt ill. But as terrible as those memories were, they paled in comparison to the things Alaire had done to my guardian angel and to the man I… loved.
I’d thought the day we escaped from the castle would also be the day our current troubles vanished. But no! Our troubles seemed to multiply like rabbits. And now those troubles included the fact that Tallis had been exiled to the worst part of the Underground City. Meanwhile Bill had pulled off some kind of escape caper that landed him in parts unknown. Now, I assumed Alaire was actively hunting both Bill and me and maybe even Tallis.
God, why couldn’t anything about the afterlife ever be as simple as the AE offices pretended?
My ears suddenly developed a harsh ringing that was swiftly followed by a killer headache. All that cranial pain made me tighten my grip on my flying steed’s bare, feminine shoulders. The Fury turned her human head to look at me in a perfect Exorcist-style, one-eighty just so she could growl at me. Seeing the look on her face pissed me off and I growled right back. Or Donnchadh did.
She whipped her head back around in a hurry after that. But my anger toward her remained riled. I suddenly wanted to rip her head off for daring to defy me. Then I would start on the rest of her limbs…
None of these feelings were mine. They belonged to Donnchadh, the spirit within me. And he was angry. As per usual.
I shoved the impulses back down with vehemence and purpose, like a sledgehammer hitting a railroad spike. After my temper finally cooled off, I thought, How did Tallis stand living with this asshole inside him for all these centuries? It was only the thousandth time that thought had crossed my mind since I’d allowed Donnchadh to take domicile inside me.
Yes, I was now suffering the after-effects of another new problem: replacing Persephone with the fierce spirit of Donnchadh. Having witnessed the effect of Donnchadh’s presence in Tallis, I already knew he was a hopelessly mad beast. But nothing could have prepared me for the experience of being pushed into ultra-violence at the drop of a hat by the nasty spirit. His anger constantly burned. Like a fire, he burned with ferocity eternally, sacrificing all sanity and reason in exchange for a never-ending rage-a-thon. If a better alternative to exiling Persephone once and for all had existed, I’d have taken it in a heartbeat.
I was so busy thinking about the asshole spirit, it took me a second to realize the incessant ringing and headache had already passed, just as quickly as they came. I wanted to blame them on Donnchadh too but somehow I didn’t think he was the culprit. This time.
On a hunch, I placed my hand on my sword’s hilt. I caught the faintest echo of the ringing I’d already experienced, which made me quickly pull my hand away.
I glanced down at the blade and couldn’t help my smile. I thought of the blade as an extension of Tallis, himself. He’d artfully crafted it and in doing so, he’d either intentionally or unintentionally created a link between the two of us. I was more than sure this sword had actually protected me from certain harm.
Now it had apparently developed a mind of its own. And I called that mind the Self. I didn’t exactly know what the Self was but it seemed to be something deep within me that reflected itself in my sword. And this self hadn’t led me astray yet, which was the reason why I continued following its instructions. And when it told me to go to the morgue and the information came in Tallis’ voice, I was only happy to do so.
Strangely enough, this deep piece of my soul had led me to some personal breakthroughs that all my countless self-help books never managed to accomplish.
But, as pretty as that piece of information was, the fact still remained: I had a freaking sword that talked to me. I previously expected objects to be just that… objects. But I was starting to understand that since the moment of my death and my subsequent revival, things were never as they appeared.
Yes, I had died.
And yes, I was brought back to life and yes, there had been lots of small print.
Quick rundown: The hereafter was run by Afterlife Enterprises, an amoral conglomerate that made Enron look like a responsible corporate citizen. Worse still, there seemed to be a conspiracy going on between the office manager, Jason Streethorn, who’d recruited me and Alaire, the current master of the Underground City.
I couldn’t speak to Jason’s goals in all of this or if he was just stupidly trusting. But I knew Alaire well enough to know that his sole intention was to consolidate his power. Having spent more facetime with Alaire than I cared to think about, I knew he wouldn’t stop at ruling just the Underground City. Only total domination over the great beyond would suit Alaire.
Swallowing my fear, I touched the sword one more time and then I closed my eyes, asking my self to guide me.
When I released the blade this time, I came away with the conviction that both Tallis and Bill were okay.
***
At any other time or place, the gray, cloud-covered skies would have made me nervous. But after the endless night surrounding Alaire’s castle, this charcoal sky was as pleasant to view as a sunrise.
The grayish light filtered through the puffy clouds ahead of me, making everything around them much easier to see. I noticed an occasional flash running through the clouds like lightning, although I never heard the traditional roll of thunder afterwards.
When we finally reached the clouds proper, the Fury leaned her head back and took a deep breath through her nose. I did the same. It was the closest thing to fresh air since I’d been relegated down here.
A droning filled my ears. At first, I guessed it was another Self-created internal sound effect. But no, the more I listened, the more I realized the sound was coming from around me rather than within me. I could hear it crossing the sky, from my right to my left at a respectable speed. When the Fury growled at it, it confirmed the sound was definitely not coming from inside my head.
The droning noise seemed familiar enough but I couldn’t place it. It reminded me of a dragonfly I’d seen once during a memorable summer at my grandma’s house… Now increase that dragonfly up to Godzilla’s size, and you can imagine the buzz.
The fear that this could be some kind of Underground City version of Mothra made my hackles rise as the droning came ever closer to us. That’s when the t
rue source of the noise finally burst from the clouds: a fire-engine-red, World War I-style propellor plane. Its front-mounted machine guns were firing right at us.
Son of a bitch! I yelled at myself.
My Fury was already responding before our attacker ever came into sight. She kept twisting and turning her body into a serpentine pattern of evasive maneuvers.
It took all the strength in my hands and legs to stay on top of her while she turned upside down and dashed sideways.
Only when the plane flew past us did my winged steed return to an even keel. But by then I was sick to my stomach and barely able to think about anything other than trying not to heave.
My nausea was all the opening Donnchadh needed. He slid into my conscious thoughts, carving his way with a burning feeling deep inside me. I knew his ignorant hatred would do a serious number on my ability to think clearly, and I glanced at the protective runes encircling my right arm. The runes were meant to help me keep Donnchadh in check but I wondered if this bloodthirsty barbarian could break free of them.
As I heard the plane coming in for another pass, I debated the wisdom of setting Donnchadh loose. Sure, we were being attacked. And I had no doubt our pilot would try to finish the job he’d started. But this wasn’t a Roman arena where one gladiator could just rip the other guy apart. If I made the smallest error up here, I could get injuries that even Donnchadh would have a hard time healing.
But heal them he would because when one was possessed by Donnchadh, they not only benefitted from his extreme strength and power, but they were also blessed with his gift of immortality.
And there was no denying that Donnchadh was the main reason why no one had ever defeated Tallis in a fight. If I could manage to get close enough to our flying ace, Donnchadh might be able to end this very quickly.
I tapped the Fury’s shoulder, making her turn her head around again. “Take out that spinny thing in front of the plane,” I told her, circling my finger to better communicate my meaning. Even with the dumbed-down English, I wasn’t sure she had a clue as to what I wanted her to do.