by Tana French
I shrugged, hands going out. This is the only one I can go after. Ive got one day left; I dont want to ditch this case without giving it everything Ive got. What are you bitching about, anyway? Youve always liked them for it.
Oh, you picked up on that? I underestimated you, babe. Yeah, Ive always liked them. But you havent. A few days ago you were claiming these four were a bunch of fluffy little bunnies who wouldnt hurt a fly between them, and now youve got that steel-trap look in your eye and youre working out the best way for us to fuck with their heads. So Im wondering what it is that youre not telling me.
His eyes were on me, level and unblinking. I gave it a second, ran my hands through my hair like I was trying to figure out how to put this. Its not like that, I said, in the end. Ive just got a feeling, Frank. Just a feeling.
Frank watched me for a long minute; I swung my legs and tried to look open and sincere. Then: OK, he said, suddenly all business, shoving himself off the wall and heading over to switch the camera back on. Youve got a deal. Did you lot bring two cars, or am I going to have to drive Danny Boy all the way back to Glenarsefuck when Im done with him?
We brought both cars, I said. Relief and adrenaline were making me giddy; my mind was racing through how to work this interview and I wanted to shoot straight up in the air like a firework. Thanks, Frank. You wont regret it.
Yeah, Frank said, well. He swapped the chairs back around. Sit. Stay. Ill get back to you.
* * *
He left me there for another couple of hours, presumably while he gave the others everything hed got, in the hope that one of them would crack and he wouldnt need to use me after all. I spent the time smoking illegal cigarettesno one seemed to careand working out the details of how to do this. I knew Frank would be coming back. From the outside, the others were impregnable, seamless; even Justin would be holding up cool as ice in the face of Franks worst. Outsiders were too far away to shake them. They were like one of those medieval fortresses built with such fierce, intricate, defensive care that they could only ever be taken from the inside, by treachery.
Finally the door flew open and Frank stuck his head in. Im about to link you up to the other interview rooms, so get in character. Five minutes to curtain.
Dont link Daniel in, I said, sitting up fast.
Dont fuck up, Frank said, and vanished again.
When he came back I was perched on the table, bending the ink tube of the Biro into a catapult and flipping the broken bits at the camera. Hey, I said, brightening up at the sight of him. I thought youd forgotten all about me.
Now how could I ever do that? Frank asked, giving me his very best grin. I even brought you coffeemilk and two sugars, am I right? No, no, dont worry about thatas I hopped off the table and went for the Biro bitssomeonell get them later. Sit down and well have a chat. Howve you been? He pulled out a chair and shoved one of the Styrofoam cups across to me.
He started out sweet as honeyId forgotten what a charmer Frank can be, when he feels like it. Youre looking wonderful, Miss Madison, and hows the old war wound getting on, andwhen I played up to him, gave a stretch to show him how well the stitches had healedisnt that a lovely sight, and just the right amount of flirtation in his grin. I threw in eyelash-and-giggle touches, just little ones, to piss Rafe off.
Frank took me through the whole John Naylor saga, or anyway a version of itnot exactly the version that had originally happened, but definitely a version that made Naylor sound like a good suspect: soothing the others down, before we started detonating things. Im all impressed now, I told him, tilting my chair back and giving him a mischievous sideways look. I thought youd given up ages ago.
Frank shook his head. We dont give up, he said soberly. Not on something as serious as this. No matter how long it takes. We dont always want to be obvious about it, but were always working away, putting the pieces together. It was impressive; he should have come with his own soundtrack. Were getting there. And right now, Miss Madison, we need a little help from you.
Sure, I said, bringing my chair down and doing focused. Do you want me to look at that guy Naylor again?
Nothing like that. Its your mind we need this time, not your eyes. You remember how the doctors said your memory might start coming back, as you recovered?
Yeah, I said, uncertainly, after a pause.
Anything you remember, anything at all, could help us a lot. I want you to have a think and tell me: has anything come back to you?
I left it a beat too long before I said, almost convincingly, No. Nothing. Just what I told you before.
Frank clasped his hands on the table and leaned towards me. Those attentive blue eyes, that gentle, coaxing voice: if Id been a genuine civilian, Id have been melting all over my chair. See, Im not so sure. Im getting the impression youve remembered something new, Miss Madison, but youre worried about telling me. Maybe you think I might misinterpret it, and the wrong person could get in trouble? Is that it?
I threw him a quick looking-for-reassurance glance. Sort of. I guess.
He smiled at me, all crinkling crows-feet. Trust me, Miss Madison. We dont go around charging people with serious crimes unless we have serious evidence. Youre not about to get anyone arrested all by yourself.
I shrugged, made a face at my coffee cup. Its nothing big. It probably doesnt mean anything anyway.
You let me worry about that, OK? Frank said soothingly. He was about one step from patting my hand and calling me love. Youd be surprised what can come in useful. And if it doesnt, then theres no harm done, am I right?
OK, I said, on a breath. Its just . . . OK. I remember blood, on my hands. All over my hands.
There you go, Frank said, keeping that reassuring smile switched on. Well done. That wasnt so hard, was it? I shook my head. Can you remember what you were doing? Were you standing up? Sitting down?
Standing up, I said. I didnt have to put the shake in my voice. A few feet away, in the interview rooms I knew inside out, Daniel was waiting patiently for someone to come back and the other three were slowly, silently, beginning to wind tighter. Leaning against a hedgeit was prickly. I was . . . I mimed twisting up my top, pressing it against my ribs. Like that. Because of the blood, to make it stop. But it didnt help.
Were you in pain?
Yeah, I said, low. It hurt. A lot. I thought . . . I was scared I was going to die.
We were good together, me and Frank; we were on the same page. We were working together as smoothly as Abby and me making breakfast, as smoothly as a pair of professional torturers. You cant be both, Daniel had told me. And: She was never cruel.
Youre doing great, Frank told me. Now that its started coming back to you, youll have the whole lot remembered in no time, youll see. Thats what the doctors told us, isnt it? Once the floodgates open . . . He flipped through the file and pulled out a map, one of the ones wed used during our training week. Do you think you could show me where you were?
I took my time, picked a spot about three-quarters of the way from the house to the cottage and put my finger on it. Maybe there, I think. Im not sure.
Great, Frank said, doing a careful little scribble in his notebook. Now I want you to do something else for me. Youre leaning against that hedge, and youre bleeding, and youre scared. Can you try and think backwards? Just before that, what had you been doing?
I kept my eyes on the map. I was all out of breath, like . . . Running. I was running. So fast I fell over. I hurt my knee.
From where? Think hard. What were you running away from?
I dont I shook my head, hard. No. I cant tell what bits happened, and what bits I just . . . dreamed, or something. I couldve
dreamed all of it, even the blood.
Its possible, Frank said, nodding easily. Well keep that in mind. But, just in case, I think you need to tell me everythingeven the parts you probably dreamed. Well sort them out as we go. OK?
I left a long pause. Thats all, I said at last, too weakly. Running, and falling over. And the blood. Thats it.
Are you sure?
Yeah. Im positive. Theres nothing else.
Frank sighed. Heres the problem, Miss Madison, he said. A fine, steely sediment was slowly building up in his voice. Just a few minutes ago, you were worried about getting the wrong person into trouble. But nothing youve said so far points towards anyone at all. That tells me youre skipping something, along the way.
I gave him my defiant Lexie glare, chin out. No Im not.
Sure you are. And the really interesting question, as far as Im concerned, is why. Frank shoved his chair back and started a leisurely stroll around the interview room, hands in his pockets, making me shift again and again to watch him. See, call me crazy, but I figured we were on the same side here, you and me. I thought both of us were trying to find out who stabbed you and put that person away. Am I crazy? Does that sound crazy to you?
I shrugged, twisting to keep an eye on him. He kept circling. Back when you were in hospital, you answered every question I askednot a bother, no hesitation, no messing about. You were a lovely witness, Miss Madison, lovely and helpful. But now, all of a sudden, youre not interested any more. So either youve decided to turn the other cheek on someone who almost killed youand forgive me if Im wrong, but you dont look like a saint to meor theres something else, something more important, getting in the way.
He leaned against the wall behind me. I gave up on watching him and started picking nail polish off my thumbnail. So I have to ask myself, Frank said softly, what could possibly be more important to you than putting this person away? You tell me, Miss Madison. Whats important to you?
Good chocolate, I said, to my thumbnail.
Franks tone didnt change. I think Ive got to know you pretty well. When you were in hospital, what did you talk about, every day, the second I got in your door? What was the one thing you kept asking for, even when you knew you couldnt have it? What was the one thing you were dying to see, the day you got out? What had you so excited you nearly burst your stitches jumping around at the thought?
I kept my head down, bit at the nail polish. Your friends, Frank said, very quietly. Your housemates. They matter to you, Miss Madison. More than anything else I can think of. Maybe more than getting the person who stabbed you. Dont they?
I shrugged. Course they matter to me. So?
If you had to make that choice, Miss Madison. If, lets just say, just for the hell of it, you remembered that one of them had stabbed you. What would you do?
I wouldnt have to make that choice, because none of them would hurt me. Ever. Theyre my friends.
Thats exactly my point. Youre protecting someone, and I dont see that being John Naylor. Who is there that youd protect, except your friends?
Im not protecting
Before I even heard him move he had come off the wall and slammed both hands down on the table beside me, his face inches from mine. I flinched harder than I meant to. Youre lying to me, Miss Madison. Do you honestly not realize how bloody obvious that is? You know something important, something that could blow this case wide open, and youre hiding it. Thats obstruction. Its a crime. It can land you in jail.
I jerked my head back, shoved my chair away from him. Youre going to arrest me? For what? Jesus, Im the one who got hurt here! If I just want to forget all about it
If you want to get yourself stabbed every day of the week and twice on Sunday, I dont give a flying fuck. But when you waste my time and my officers time, thats my business. Do you know how many people have been working this case for the past month, Miss Madison? Do you have the faintest clue how much time and energy and money weve put into this? Theres not a chance Im going to let all that go down the toilet because some spoiled little girl is too wrapped up in her friends to give a fuck about anything or anyone else. Not a chance in hell.
He wasnt faking. His face thrust hard up to mine, the hot blue sizzle in his eyes: he was raging and he meant every word, to me, to Lexie, probably even he didnt know which. This girl: she bent reality around her like a lens bending light, she pleated it into so many flickering layers that you could never tell which one you were looking at, the longer you stared the dizzier you got. Im going to break this case, Frank said. I dont care how long it takes: the person who did this is going down. And if you dont pull your head out of your arse and realize how important this is, if you keep playing stupid little games with me, youre going down right alongside him. Is that clear?
Get out of my face, I said. My forearm was up between us, blocking him. In that second I realized that my fist was clenched and that I was as angry as he was.
Who stabbed you, Miss Madison? Can you look me in the eye and tell me you dont know? Lets see you do it. Tell me you dont know. Come on.
Fuck that. I dont have to prove anything to you. I remember running, and blood on my hands, and you can do whatever you want with that. Now leave me alone. I slumped down in my chair, shoved my hands in my pockets and stared at the wall in front of me.
I felt Franks eyes on the side of my face, his fast breathing, for a long time. Right, he said, at last. He eased back slowly, away from the table. Well leave it at that, then. For now. And he left.
* * *
It was a long time before he came backanother hour, maybe, Id stopped watching the clock. I picked up the Biro bits, one by one, and arranged them in pretty patterns on the edge of the table.
Well, Frank said, when he finally decided to join me. You were right: that was fun.
Poetry in motion, I said. Did it do the job?
He shrugged. It rattled them, all right; theyre antsy as hell. But theyre not cracking, not yet. Another couple of hours might do it, I dont know, but Daniels starting to get restlessoh, very politely, of course, but hes been asking how much longer we think this might take. I figure if you want any time with the other three before he walks out, youd better take them now.
Thanks, Frank, I said, and meant it. Thank you.
Ill keep him as long as I can, but Im not guaranteeing anything. He took my coat off the back of the door and held it for me. As I slid into it he said, Im playing fair with you, Cassie. Now lets see you play fair with me.
The others were downstairs in the lobby. They all looked gray and eye-baggy. Rafe was at the window, jiggling one knee; Justin was huddled in a chair like a big miserable stork. Only Abby, sitting up straight with her hands cupped in her lap, looked anything like composed.
Thanks for coming in, Frank said cheerfully. Youve all been very, very helpful. Your mate Daniel is just finishing up a few things for us; he said you should go ahead, hell catch you on the way.
Justin started upright, like hed just been woken up. But why he began, but Abby cut him off, her fingers coming down across his wrist.
Thanks, Detective. Call us if theres anything else you need.
Will do, Frank said, giving her a wink. He had the door open for us, and was holding out his other hand to shake good-bye, before anyone caught up enough to argue. See you soon, he said to each of us, as we passed.
* * *
Why did you do that? Justin demanded, as soon as the door closed behind us. I dont want to leave without Daniel.
Shut up, Abby said, giving his arm a squeeze that looked casual, and keep walking. Dont turn around. Mackeys probably watching us.
In the car, nobody said anything for a very long t
ime.
So, Rafe said, after a silence that felt like it was filing my teeth. What did you talk about this time? He braced himself, a tiny jerk of his head, before he turned to look at me.
Leave it, Abby said, from the front.
Why Daniel? Justin wanted to know. He was driving like someones lunatic granny, switching back and forth between bursts of suicidal speedI was praying we wouldnt run into a traffic copand patches of obsessive carefulness, and his voice sounded like he might be about to cry. What do they want? Have they arrested him?
No, Abby said firmly. There was obviously no way she could have known that, but Justins shoulders dropped a fraction of an inch. Hell be fine. Dont worry.