by Diana Gardin
And then everything went down with Eli and the luxury car theft ring, and I didn’t have time to grab Dove and run, the way I’d planned to do if Eli ever found me again. So for now, Dove is safer with Lo.
For now, as long as no one knows that she even exists.
“Let’s go into the living room and talk.” Lo rubs a tiny circle on my back. “I want to hear about what’s been going on since I’ve seen you last.”
We move into the cozy little living space with a couch and a love seat, the television anchored over the fireplace, and I pull Dove onto my lap and settle her there with a few of her teething toys and a soft Velcro book with textured pages.
“Do you remember the new neighbors I told you about? They moved in the day I brought you Dove. I became friendly with the woman, Indy. I didn’t know it at the time, but she was an undercover police officer who just happened to be investigating Eli…and the car theft ring he was operating.”
Lo shakes her head, her expression dumbfounded. “What? Seriously? I still can’t believe the man you married is that man…” Her eyes dart down to Dove. “Sorry. Talking about him gets me all worked up. So what happened? I know Eli found you, but how?”
I rub the side of my neck, where a band of tension is forming. “Eli found me because he broke into Lilliana Snyder’s headquarters. Well, Eli found my records.”
When I arrived in North Carolina with Lo, Lilliana was a huge part of my new life. Her nonprofit organization, the Underground, is a program for women who are escaping abusive situations. She helps relocate them, find housing and jobs for them, and acts as a general lifeline for those who feel like they’ve lost a piece of themselves to their abusers.
Lo’s shoulders hunch. “Jesus, I’m sorry, Frannie. I know you told me not to worry, but I am concerned. Does he know about Dove?”
“No, he didn’t find information about Dove because Lilliana and I decided when I registered not to include her information in my file. Thank God we made that decision.”
Lo slaps a hand over her mouth. Her eyes well. “I can’t believe…I’m so sorry, Frannie. You’ve been through enough.”
I reach out a hand and squeeze my friend’s knee. “Stop. It’s fine. Talking about him gets me all worked up too. Listen, I brought you a check, but money might be tight for a bit.”
With a frown, I explain the rest of the story. How Eli got away from the police and is now on the run and most likely coming after me instead of doing the smart thing and getting out of the country. I tell her about Night Eagle Security and how they’ve placed me under their protection. And I tell her about Ryder, leaving out the part where we slept together this afternoon.
“So I’m not going to be able to work for a while. They say that they’ll provide for me, but I’m not quite sure how I’ll be able to send enough money for Dove. I promise I’ll figure it out, though.” A pit forms in the bottom of my stomach as I consider not being able to provide for my baby girl.
All I’ve ever wanted since the second I found out I was pregnant was to keep her safe. From the father who’d hurt me even after knowing she was growing inside me. From the grandparents who didn’t care about anything except cashing in on a son-in-law who made millions in dirty money. From anyone or anything in this big, bad world that would ever want to hurt her.
Lo chews on her bottom lip. “I’m not worried about the money. You and Dove are my family…don’t worry about that for a second. But I have been wondering something. I hate to ask this…but should you be here right now, Frannie? I mean, if Eli hasn’t been caught and you have an around-the-clock bodyguard who you had to sneak away from, is it safe?”
I considered the possibility that I could be putting myself in danger, not to mention Lo and Dove. But if Eli was going to make a move, if he knew where I was when I was at the condo, he would have done it while I was waiting for the car. The sooner he has me, the sooner he can get out of town.
He doesn’t know about Dove. And I intend to keep it that way.
I squeeze my baby girl a little tighter to my chest and she leans her head back against my sternum. “It’s safe. Thorn Ryder’s going to be in a state when he finds out I gave him the slip, but as far as Eli is concerned, he doesn’t know I’m here. I’m sure of that.”
Lo nods. “And they don’t know about Dove—the people who are protecting you? You don’t want to tell them?”
I hesitate for just a second before I shake my head. “It’s better if they don’t know. They’re not a law enforcement agency, but they’re connected to the authorities. What if they tell them? And what if the information about Dove gets back to Eli? I can’t take that risk. I don’t want Eli to know about her, I don’t want his family to know and try to make a claim on her. I don’t even want my own parents to know about her. I’m not ready to share her with any of them. Not yet, Lo.”
Lo’s eyes go soft at the corners. “I understand. I have the pistol you bought me, just in case. And I’ve been practicing at the range. I promised you that I’d keep Dove safe until you were able to do it yourself. And I’m not going back on that promise.”
My hand finds Lo’s, and I grasp her fingers tightly in mine. “Thank you. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
She holds on just as tight, but the expression in her eyes is the only response she offers. And it’s all I need. It’s full of friendship and warmth.
Family without blood. That’s what Lo is to me.
I allow myself to stay at Lobelia’s house for another hour, playing with Dove and talking to my best friend. My heart plummets when I look at the clock mounted on the wall beside the kitchen entrance.
“I’ve been here too long. They’re going to think something bad happened to me. I have to go.” Pulling out the same burner phone, I schedule a car to take me back to Wilmington. Before I go, I’ll leave the phone with Lo to have her toss for me.
With a heart so heavy it feels like it’s been weighted down by stones, I pick up my baby and carry her to the crib Lo has set up in her second bedroom. I flash back to my two-bedroom apartment in Wilmington, where I made a nursery for Dove. I had to erase every memory of her there, pretend she never existed when I found out that Eli was close enough to reach me. Walking by her empty bedroom every night nearly broke me. There were some nights when I’d just sit in the hallway outside her door and sob, crying until there wasn’t a drop of moisture left inside me because it felt like a piece of me had been ripped out.
And all because of Eli.
But at least I hadn’t actually lost her the way I’d pretended I had.
I hadn’t miscarried, the way I’d made my parents—and everyone else in my Oklahoma town—believe before I’d fled to Wilmington to start a new life.
Dove was alive, despite the beating I’d taken from that bastard. She is the epitome of strength, and she made it to full term despite the fact that she was nearly taken from me because of that man.
Never again. I settle her down into the soft blankets inside her crib, kissing her forehead as her eyelids are already fluttering closed. She lets out a soft sigh as she drifts off, most likely about to sleep through the night. Because she’s an angel baby sent from heaven for me because I’ve already been put through hell.
Never again will I allow him to hurt us like that. I’ll die before I let him get to my little Dove.
10
RYDER
The smell of her surrounds me before I open my eyes. It’s funny how accustomed I am to her scent now—lavender and honey—like I’ve been swimming in it for years instead of only hours. Sleeping beside her was like taking a pill; it was only a nap but it was the soundest, most restful sleep I’ve gotten in as long as I can remember.
It takes me a second, but my eyes suddenly snap open at the absence of her. My arms reach for the spot beside me to pull her in close, but I already know the truth before they hit the empty sheet.
Frannie is gone.
I bolt upright in the bed and grab my cell phone from the nightstand. Checking the time
, I realize that I’ve been asleep for a couple of hours.
Swinging my legs over the side of the bed, I hold completely still and just listen.
The only sounds I hear in the condo are the ones symbiotic to the building itself. The humming of the air-conditioning unit as it cools the penthouse. The ticking and clicking of the icemaker traveling from the refrigerator in the kitchen down the hallway. A drip coming from one of the faucets in the master bathroom.
But there’s no sound to indicate that Frannie is here.
Nausea rolls in the crater forming in my stomach at the same time that my body kicks into gear. Silently, I pull on my shorts. Clearing the bedroom doorframe and heading out into the hallway, I keep my ears trained for every potential sound and my senses available to react to every potential threat as I head for the living room to retrieve my gun.
But as I travel through the condo, opening doors and clearing rooms, I realize that there’s no danger here. In fact, there’s nothing here but me.
I’m completely alone.
The nausea in my stomach gets stronger, and a feeling of panic rises until it almost overwhelms me. Springing for my phone, I dial Jacob Owen’s number.
He answers on the first ring. “Owen.”
“Boss Man. I’ve lost the client.”
There’s silence on the other end of the line, and then, “What the hell did you just say?”
Thirty minutes later, the Delta Squad sits or stands in the penthouse living room, all staring at me as I explain the events leading up to Frannie’s disappearance. Just the fact that they’re calling it her “disappearance” makes me want to simultaneously throw up and slam my fist into something solid. She’s my responsibility, and I failed.
Again.
Shutting down my mind against the rampage of thoughts about the last time I failed to protect someone I cared about, I finish my story and aim my gaze down at the floor, solidly refusing to meet the eyes of my teammates.
Jacob begins barking out orders. “I don’t give a shit that Wolf’s already done it. Bull’s-Eye, check the condo for any signs of struggle or foul play. If she was taken out of this place against her will, I want us to find out about it right now. Sleuth, get Sayward on the phone and see if she can track Frannie’s cell phone.”
The cotton filling my mouth makes it difficult for me to speak. “Actually, she left her phone here. I tried calling it already, but it started ringing on the kitchen counter where she left it.”
Jacob’s icy stare has my own gaze hitting the floor again. Shame consumes me, and fear. Fear for Frannie. Because of what happened between us this afternoon, my feelings toward her are amplified. Knowing she’s out there alone? It’s killing me.
What if she’s scared? What if she’s hurt? What if she’s—
Everyone’s voices die away as I fall into the spiral of my dark thoughts. Worry gnaws at my insides, and I get up from the couch and pace away from the rest of my team. Standing in front of the windows, I settle my hands on top of my head, my fingers interlocking.
I’m not sure how long I remain like that before Ben approaches, standing silently beside me for a moment while we both stare out into the dark night.
“She’s going to be all right.” His voice is quiet, subdued. “No one got into this building, bro. And no one got into this unit, not with you guarding it. She was lying in bed right next to you; there’s no way he stole her out from under you. You know that.”
And deep down inside, I do know that. All that keeps flashing in my mind is the way her face shut down earlier when I asked her to tell me what she was hiding.
“She’s keeping something from me.” The words fall out of my mouth before I can stop them, sullen stones that land between Ben and me with heavy thuds.
“And that upsets you because it makes it harder to keep her safe? Or for other reasons you aren’t ready to admit yet?”
And Ben McBride, for all his joking demeanor and lightheartedness, has gotten to the heart of the matter before anyone else managed to.
“Doesn’t matter. She’s keeping secrets, and now she’s gone. I need to get her back before he finds her, Cowboy.” The urgency in my voice scares me.
“We will.” There’s no doubt in his voice, no room for negotiation.
Jacob’s gruff voice calls us back to attention. “We’re going to have to call in our friends at the WPD. Put out an APB on her so that cruisers can be on the lookout.”
With a heavy exhale, I nod. “Yeah. Okay.”
Jacob is putting his cell phone to his ear when the elevator slides open. Five pairs of eyes focus on the pair of silver doors.
Frannie walks into the condo. Breath enters my lungs again at the sight of her.
She stops short as her big blue eyes land on all of us and go wide. “Oh, crap.”
Stalking toward her, I grab hold of her wrist and pull her into my body, crushing her against my chest. I don’t give a flying fuck that my boss and all the members of my team are standing behind me.
She’s home.
Frannie sighs against me. “I’m okay.” Her voice is muffled.
Pulling back, I place one hand behind her neck and examine her face before allowing my eyes to scan her body. There’s not a single cut or bruise on her, and my breathing comes just a little bit easier. My anger, however, starts to boil somewhere deep in my chest.
“Where the hell have you been?” The words explode out of me, the eruption louder and more violent than I expected it to be.
A throat clears behind me, but I don’t turn to face the guys. Frannie’s eyes flick toward them. I can feel them all standing, and when they file past us on their way toward the elevator, they each have their own way of saying goodbye.
Lawson uses his words: “Catch you later, Wolf,” whereas Bain just grunts his irritation. Cowboy chuckles like he knows something the rest of them don’t, and Jacob instructs me to fill him in in the morning on what’s gone down in Frannie’s absence.
When the elevator doors slide shut behind them, Frannie walks away from me. I watch, my jaw clenched tight, as she sidles through the living room without a word, down the hallway, and into the master bedroom.
Where she closes and locks the door.
All the air inside of me rushes out, and I sink onto the couch. My head falls into my hands, and when I hear the shower turn on, I let out a groan loud enough to wake the dead.
When she returns, she’s showered and dressed in tight black leggings and an oversized long-sleeved T-shirt. The scent of lavender and honey almost knocks me on my ass as she settles into a corner of the couch.
“I needed some space.” She doesn’t look at me when she speaks, instead playing with the hem of her dark purple shirt.
“Excuse me?” Because I can’t have heard her right. “Because of what happened between us this afternoon?”
She doesn’t answer, but her fingers continue to fiddle with her shirt.
“I asked you, Frannie. Before we slept together, I asked you if you were sure it was what you wanted. You said yes. Are you suddenly having amnesia?” The words are hurtling from me like bullets, because I’m pissed and confused and more than a little hurt.
She ran. From me.
It becomes painfully clear to me that I had a vision this afternoon, for a fleeting moment, of that lonely future I’ve always seen for myself shifting. Of that picture of myself alone, no family, changing into something completely different. And Frannie being gone without a trace disrupted that completely.
It scared the shit out of me.
“It’s not just that…it’s everything. I’m cooped up here like a caged animal. I was feeling claustrophobic. I needed a break from all of it. From the babysitting, from everything.” She folds her arms across her chest and seems to sink further into the couch.
I throw my hands up. “What the fuck do you expect me to do here, Frannie? You’re basically in Witness Protection. I’m all you’ve got. I’m trying to make this experience as enjoyable for you as po
ssible, but you’ve got to meet me halfway. Why don’t you just try telling me what you need instead of just running away next time?”
Her bottom lip disappears into her mouth. “I can try. But I can’t make any promises. Sometimes I need my space.”
Flying off the couch, I pace across the room. “Yeah? Well, dying men in the desert need water. But they don’t always get it. My job is to keep you safe. You can’t run off like that, or I can’t do my fucking job. You get that? Dammit, Frannie, don’t do it again.”
She just stares at me with defiant eyes.
I eat up the distance between us in two strides and place both of my hands on her thighs. “Do you know how it felt for me tonight? To wake up and expect to have you in my arms and instead to feel nothing but an empty bed? And then the panic that I felt when I realized you weren’t even in this condo? I thought something bad happened to you, Frannie. On my watch. And that? That would have damn near killed me. Do you understand that?”
Her eyes fill with tears. “I’m sorry.”
As one streak of wetness slides down her cheek, my thumb automatically glides across her cheekbone to wipe it away. “Don’t do that. Don’t cry, sweetheart. Just don’t put me through that again. Please.”
She closes her eyes, agony scrawled across her expression. I watch her face, waiting. When she opens them again, she locks gazes with me.
“I’ll try, Ryder. I’ll try really hard. That’s all I can promise.”
And for tonight, that’ll have to be good enough.
11
FRANNIE
I don’t know how long I lie awake in bed that night. Thoughts about Dove and the fear that Eli will find out about her swirl and mix with my confusion and attraction for Ryder until my brain is such a jumbled mess that my limbs are twisted in the covers and my body breaks out in a cold sweat.
Sleeping in the bed alone again feels wrong. I only had an hour in it this afternoon with Ryder, and I didn’t even sleep, but there was a sense of belonging there with us that couldn’t be faked and now can’t be erased.