by Alex Wheatle
“I could do all that for ya,” I said. “Looked after Dad, didn’t I?”
“No, Naromi. Someone’s meant to be looking after you. Not the other way around. That much I do know. You’re still a pup.”
“I like looking after people, Nan.”
“And you did a grand job with your dad. But he was never your responsibility. Oh no. The nosy people should’ve given him more help. I don’t mean to offend ya but they should’ve handcarted him away to Alcoholics Anonymous or one of them rehab places. Forgive me, Naromi, but he coulda served shots in a pub by cutting himself.”
I busted out some mad giggles. Nan always had jokes.
“Dad never liked the social workers,” I said. “Always swearing at ’em he was. Mind your frucking own beeswax! he used to holler. This is my flat! Naomi’s my daughter, so fruck off out of it! Funny thing was, it wasn’t his flat. It was Mum’s but she—”
“It’s no small wonder you have a mouth like a Woodside drain,” Nan cut in before I got upset. “You need to rein in your swearing, Naromi. Who’s gonna marry ya with a mouth like that? Don’t expect any nice Mr. Swales to be asking. My Rita had the same problem. She had the mouth of a chimneysweep’s Y-fronts.”
“They’re always telling me off about my swearing,” I admitted.
“It’s not ladylike, Naromi. I can’t imagine Lady Di ever swearing. Oh Lord no. She knew her Ps and Qs and how to drink a cuppa tea with her little finger up in the air. A joy she was. Killed her they did. One day it’ll come out, murdering bastards. They didn’t want her to have a desert baby with black wavy hair, you see. Oh no. You can’t have the next king of England being the brother of a desert baby, can ya? Anyway, now, what was I on about? You haven’t got anything to worry about what Him Upstairs is thinking about ya. He’ll understand. Gracious He is.”
I flashed a grin.
“Naromi, watch my seat while I go to the ladies. Hopefully they’ve got some extra rolls in today.”
“Extra rolls?”
“Toilet rolls. Saves me going to Tesco and buying ’em. Mind you, library bog paper’s a bit rougher than Tesco. Tree bark might be smoother.”
Returning with her handbag much bulkier than it was before, Nan dropped herself beside me, drained another glug from her flask, smacked her lips, and picked up her third magazine. I chuckled.
“They’ve got a computer wotsit room here if you fancy it,” said Nan. “You go on, I’ll be here. Perhaps Mr. Swales might come in on his day off just to say how you do. Nice Greek hair he’s got. Did I tell you he looks like Omar Sharif? He’s got desert eyes.”
I wondered who the hell Omar Sharif was.
* * *
I rode the Internet until twelve thirty p.m. Nan tapped me on the shoulder. “Time for lunch,” she said. “Oh, and by the way, I love your hair. The nosy people are not too much good at anything, but if they did your hair I’ll give ’em a sticky star for that.”
“It was my foster mum, Colleen.”
“Oh? Who’s she then? She African? Colleen doesn’t sound like an African name. It’s Irish, isn’t it? Irish people don’t do plaits, do they? Not that good anyway.”
The gusting wind had brought rain with it and Nan did her best to cover us from it with her small, broken umbrella. We made our way to a café and sat at a table. “My treat,” she said. She used a handkerchief to wipe the wet from her face.
“You got enough money, Nan?”
“What do you take me for? If I’m going to the library I always make sure to put four quid in my coat pocket for lunch.”
“But I’m with you today.”
“Oh, I’ve only got four quid. Never mind, we’ll share some scampi and chips.”
“It’s all right, Nan, I’ve got my own money.”
“Didn’t steal it, did ya?” she wanted to know. “I won’t have it, Naromi! Your grandmother loved to nick clothes in C and As and Marks and Sparks years ago. Got caught she did. They took her to the police station. Never been so embarrassed in all my bloody life. Verbal warning she got. I can tell ya for free that when I dragged her home she got a lot more than that.”
“Nan, I didn’t nick the money.”
“You sure? That’s a fair bit of money for an eleven-year-old.”
“I’m fourteen, Nan.”
“You are? Since when?”
I paused as a waiter approached. “Can I help you?” he asked.
“Scampi and chips, please,” Nan ordered. “And I don’t want old chips that you’ve kept in that heating thing for half an hour. I want fresh chips.”
“Yes, of course,” the waiter nodded. His attention switched to me. “And for Miss . . .”
“I’ll have the same,” I replied.
Nan watched the waiter return to the kitchen and as soon as he was out of our radar, she leaned in closer and said, “He gave me cold chips last time I was here. Not having that again. Nothing worse than cold chips. I can tell ya for free I’m not gonna stand for it.”
“Nan,” I said after a while, “what was my mum like when she was my age?”
“Your mum? She was a little dear she was, a little dear. Now let me see . . . My Rita would always bring your mum around for Sunday dinner—I used to do a beef roast. Lived in Moyston Coals they did . . . Can’t remember the number of the bus they had to get. Was it a 133 or a 68?”
“Rita lived alone, didn’t she?”
“Where’s your English, Naromi?” Nan barked. “You make sure you refer to my Rita as Gran.”
“Sorry, Nan. Did Gran have a guy?”
“As soon as he heard about my Rita being with child, he legged it like a big-fisted money lender was after him. Your grandpa’s name was Bill. Skinny as a cheap sausage he was. A bit of a charmer. Horseshoe smile he had. Flies could get lost in his dimples. He used to work on the Crewbury docks and he sold all sorts of plunder in pubs. He loved to smoke fat cigars, did Bill. Those cigars had a load more meat on them than he had. Don’t ask me how he lifted up all those boxes.”
“Your scampi and chips,” the waiter announced, placing the plates on the table.
Nan looked at the chips suspiciously. “Fresh chips?”
“Taken out of the fryer just this minute.”
“Okay, ta very much. Now, be off with you! I’m talking to my great-granddaughter. Isn’t she a looker?” Nan pinched my cheeks.
The waiter smiled and went back to his business.
“My mum?” I asked again.
“Oh, sorry, Naromi. There’s me going on about my Rita and Bill and you asked about your mum. A little dear she was. Loved going to Riddlesdown Park in the summer holidays with pink ribbons in her hair. We’d play rounders and have a picnic. Peanut butter and jam sandwiches we had. Oh, and lemon tarts. Mustn’t forget the lemon tarts. Your mum was good at rounders. She clobbered the ball for miles and miles. The birds had to watch out. She ran her little red cotton heart out going around the bases. Big grin on her face. All the boys fancied her. My Rita had to shoo them away when they knocked on her door—”
“So she wasn’t all sad-like then?” I wanted to know.
“No, not at all. That came later when my Rita passed.”
“Must’ve been horrible.”
“Yes, it was,” Nan replied. “Grieved forever, your mum did. She didn’t wanna go back to school.”
“What did they do?”
“The doctors and the nosy people put her on tablets,” said Nan. “Don’t think they helped her too much. It sucked all the get-up-and-go out of her.”
“So Mum had it hard.”
“Oh yes, by and by. She never got over my Rita’s passing. That’s probably one of the reasons why she took so many pills. Poor little dear.”
* * *
We stayed in the café for another couple of hours. I bought Nan two cups of tea and I topped up with a can of Coke. Nan told me stories about two-timing bingo callers, gold-toothed market traders, one-eyed cat burglars, and female pickpockets. The wind and rain had quit by the time
we rolled home. As we stepped out of the elevator and turned right onto Nan’s balcony, we spotted Tony, Louise, and another social worker waiting outside Nan’s front door. Monkey on a cracking ice rink. They didn’t look like they were about to tell us they’d won at bingo.
“Oh shoot!” Nan yelled. “The nosy people!”
I’m not sure why but I started to bust a chuckle as we approached them.
“You nosy people haven’t been inside my house, have ya?” asked Nan. She fumbled in her coat pocket for her keys. “I’ll have you know I clean it in the evening rather than the morning, so don’t you go about titting and tutting. I won’t stand for it.”
“It’s all right, Primrose,” said Louise. “We’re just waiting for Naomi.”
“We just wanted to know she was okay,” added Tony.
“I suppose you all want a cuppa tea,” said Nan. She opened the front door. “I haven’t got enough crumpets to go around, though, unless you want to cut them in half. Two of you will have to stand up. I’ve only got two chairs around my kitchen table. And I won’t have any of your questions.”
“Nan, I don’t think they wanna step inside and have a cuppa tea,” I said. “They’ve come to take me back.”
“She’s not in trouble, is she?” asked Nan. “She hasn’t been nicking, has she? If she has I’ll give her what for. I’m not too old to dish it—”
“No, nothing like that,” replied Louise. “We’re just glad she’s safe and sound. Perhaps she should’ve told us she was paying you a visit.”
“Can I see Nan at the weekend then?” I asked.
“Of course,” Tony said. “I’ll drop you myself and pick you up.”
Nan looked at me with kind eyes. “Bless your little red cotton heart,” she said. “Give me a ring to tell me what time you’re coming around. I’ll put the kettle on and make sure I’ll get some crumpets in.”
“You’ll be all right, Nan?”
“I’ll be all right by and by. I’m going to watch an old Barbara Stanwyck film for the rest of my afternoon. That’s if I can remember how to work the DVD player. Marvelous she was. Dear Mr. Swales should’ve been an actor with his Greek wavy hair. He would’ve been marvelous too.”
Nan offered me a big grin as she entered her flat, but before she closed the door behind her, she gave a brutal side-eye to Tony and Louise.
“Everything seems to be all right, so I’ll be off,” said Louise’s social worker colleague. I’d never seen her before.
Tony watched her disappear down the stairs before he spoke. “Everything okay, Naomi? You ready to go home now? Maybe next time you can tell us when you want to see your nan.”
“Yeah, I’m ready.”
“If you don’t mind, Tony, I’ll be driving Naomi back to your place,” said Louise. “I just need to have a quiet word with her. Is that okay with you?”
“No, not a problem,” said Tony. “I’ll see you back at my place.”
Louise gave me a pissed-off really look. That meant one of her long lectures. Never thought I’d ever say this but I wanted to wheel home with Tony.
Louise didn’t drop a word until I was in the passenger seat. She sat next to me with her arms folded. “Why did you visit your nan on a school day?”
Okay, how would Kim deal with this situation? Don’t let ’em chat down to you, Naoms. Release the rebel in ya.
“Cos I felt like it,” I said.
“Are you sure it hasn’t got anything to do with that incident you had with Cassandra?”
“No! I’m not scared of her! You think I missed school just because of her? No freaking way.”
“It’s okay to be scared, Naomi,” Louise said. “Cassandra won’t be attending the unit for a while. She has her own issues to work on.”
“How many times do I have to tell ya? I’m not scared of her! I haven’t seen Nan for a while so I wanted to see her. I don’t wanna leave it so long that when I turn up I find out she died.”
“That’s not going to happen.”
I raised my voice: “How d’you know? Nobody expected what happened to my mum but it happened anyway. I dunno if you’ve noticed but Nan’s getting old. And she forgets stuff. How come you people aren’t checking up on her?”
Awkward moment. Louise stared through the windshield. I fiddled with the car radio.
“Something must be the matter, Naomi,” Louise broke the silence. “Tony dropped you at school. He said you seemed well, in good spirits. He even said you two have started to get along. You haven’t said anything to anyone about wanting to visit your nan. As far as I remember you haven’t seen her for, what, two years?”
I shrugged. “Doesn’t mean I don’t wanna see her. It’s not like you take me to see her. I’ve asked you nuff times.”
“That’s not true!”
“Yes it is! You just wanna take me to boring lunches and talk about boring issues. By the way, Nan loves my hair.”
“I have to do my job, Naomi,” Louise said. “And find out if anything’s bothering you.”
“I’ll be a lot better if I can see my nan when I want to!”
Louise took a few deep breaths. I sensed she wanted to puff one of her smokes. I stared through the window. “Is everything really okay with you and Tony?” she asked. “He says you two are getting along, but is it true? Has he said anything inappropriate to you? Has he offended you in any way?”
I tuned the car stereo to a dance radio station. I pumped up the volume and started bopping my head to a banging drumbeat.
“Naomi, I asked you a question,” Louise raised her tones. “Has Tony behaved in an inappropriate way?”
“He’s a bit naggy,” I finally replied. “A bit like you
actually—but he’s all right, I s’pose. What’ve you got against him?”
That corked her flow. She was silent for the next twenty seconds.
“You sure he hasn’t said anything?” Louise had a question mark between her eyebrows. “Or did someone say something to you on the way to school? I have to try and understand your reasons for taking off like that.”
I turned up the radio volume a couple of doses more.
“All the same, I’m thinking of taking you to the Hamiltons,” Louise spoke loudly over the music.
“The who?”
“The Hamiltons,” repeated Louise. “Didn’t I tell you about them? I’m pretty sure I did.”
“Are they black too?”
“No, they’re white.”
I shrugged.
“They might prove to be a better fit for you . . . not because they’re white, but they can offer you more of their time. Colleen has her hands full with Pablo and Sharyna, and Tony does a lot of overtime.”
“If you say so.”
“You’re still on our adoption list, Naomi. My job is to find you a suitable family for the long term.”
“If you say so.”
Monkey banging cymbals. When is she gonna shut up? Maybe she didn’t have a blessed day. I bet her bosses are cussing her cos she didn’t fill in a form right or something like that. Or maybe one of her other kids ran away. That’s standard for Louise. I just wanna listen to some hard-curb grime rhymes now.
“If you want,” she went on, “I’ll arrange a weekend for you to stay with the Hamiltons. They’re good people.”
“Good people? You said that about the Holmans.”
“Hmmm.”
I liked it when I gave her her pissed-off face.
“Me seeing the Hamiltons won’t get in the way of seeing my nan?” I said.
“No, not at all.”
“Can I go on a school day?”
“No! Naomi, I know you’ve had a hard time of it but you must keep to your boundaries.”
“Boundaries? I’m not King Kong living behind a tall wooden fence.”
Louise snapped her head toward me and scoped me hard. “You’re not going to see your nan during a school day.”
“Why not? I saw her today. Tony said he’ll take me.”
/> “Tony’s just relieved that you’re safe and sound. Promise me you won’t do this again. I do have more important things to do than look for you, and so does Tony. He has to work.”
I shrugged again. “Why are you all getting your pubes in a tangle? I was gonna come back. You think I wanna end up begging and sleeping in some grimy shop doorway with some ugly hound sniffing the corners?”
* * *
I didn’t chat too much when I reached home. I had a spaghetti Bolognese dinner and then went to my room. I didn’t watch TV or put in a DVD. Pablo came in for a while and we played some game on his PlayStation but I wasn’t really feeling it. “Nomi, you’re rubbish at this!”
He wasn’t wrong.
“I’m not feeling too blessed today, Pabs,” I said to him. “I’ll be better tomorrow.”
Pablo went to his bed.
Sharyna bounced in afterward and spilled that some bruv in her class had passed her a note.
“What did it say?” I wanted to know.
“It just said, I like you.”
Sharyna couldn’t kill the grin spreading from her cheeks. “What do I do?” she asked.
I wasn’t sure what to tell her. No guy at any school or unit had ever passed me a note telling me he liked me. Gotta be grown up here. “If you like him back, then when he chats to you, just be nice to him and see what happens.”
“Thanks, Naomi.”
“But don’t let him touch you from the neck down.”
“I won’t.”
She gave me a little hug. I wasn’t quite sure what to do with my arms. Don’t freak out, Naoms. This is normal. You done good with your advice.
“Good night,” she said.
“Good night, Sharyna.”
I couldn’t sleep. My door was slightly open but Colleen still knocked. “Can I come in?” she asked.
“Yeah,” I replied.
She parked on my bed and it looked like she had prepared all evening what she was about to tell me. “Everything all right, Naomi?”
I shrugged.
“You weren’t your usual self this evening,” Colleen added.