by Lish McBride
Tevin settled his back against the solid stone wall. They’d come so far and done so much just to fall short right at the end. His chest tightened, the hopelessness of the situation suddenly overwhelming him. They weren’t going to win. Merit would be stuck married to Latimer. Who knew what would happen to him and Val. He closed his eyes, unwilling to break down in front of the guards. Willing or not, the tight feeling in his chest increased, and he felt the tears as they went down his cheeks.
“Hey, hey,” Val said. Tevin opened his eyes as she used her cuff to pat at his cheeks. “None of that. I mean, I’m one for a good cry. It’s not healthy to keep that stuff in, but I don’t think it’s as bad as all that. Besides, you’re going to smear your makeup, and Amaury did a really good job.”
He laughed then, the sound wet and thick from breaking through his tight chest. “It’s okay, Val. It is as bad as all that. We did our best.” He squeezed his friend tight to him. “I suppose it was foolish to think—” Tevin stopped himself, but it didn’t matter. Val knew him too well.
“Foolish to think we might win? Foolish to think you might actually be the hero in all this?” She scraped her fingers through his hair, like he was a dog needing a good scratch. “Silly boy, you’re a hero to me. You’re my best friend.” She gave a final scratch, shoving his head away playfully.
He grabbed her hand. “You’re my best friend, too.”
“So trust me.” Her eyes glittered as she moved her face close. “And if you think this is our best? Then maybe you are a fool.”
“What are we going to do, Val? We’re locked up.”
She nodded, an absolutely vicious grin blooming on her face. “That we are. But our friends aren’t.”
“Friends who by now know exactly where we are,” Tevin said slowly. “Did you think that was weird? All that stuff with—” He checked to make sure the guards weren’t listening but dropped his voice anyway. “With Latimer?”
Val rested her head against the wall. “Yeah, I did.” They watched the female guard lose another hand, the pasty guy taking the pot. “It was almost like he was trying to help us.”
* * *
• • •
They didn’t have much to do after that but wait. Waiting, as most folks know, does a strange thing to time. Minutes stretch like taffy, becoming protracted and mutable, seeming to go on far longer than they should. Waiting as doom sneaked closer and closer only made it worse. Tevin had no idea how much time passed as they sat there, but after a while, there was a knock at the outer door.
One of the guards, the card sharp, stood up to let in a liveried servant holding a large tray.
The woman eyed the newcomer setting the edge of the tray on the table. But the servant didn’t seem to notice, quickly divesting the tray of several elegant dishes. Tevin and Val kept their faces blank, not wanting to tip off the guards to the fact that they knew the servant. Where Ellery had managed to get their hands on a retainer’s uniform, Tevin had no idea.
Ellery quickly explained each dish, ending with a flourish as they poured each guard a small glass of wine. “I know it isn’t much, but it’s compliments of the wedding party. This way you won’t entirely miss the festivities.”
The guards sat down to their meal, clearly pleased with the offering.
“Might I recommend the lamb? It’s been roasted with peppers—quite spicy, though I’m sure not anything you two couldn’t handle. I’m told the meat melts on your tongue.” Ellery lifted thin slices of lamb onto their plates. With a roguish wink, they grabbed a sliver of the meat off the serving plate and popped it into their mouth, eyes rolling back in bliss. The guards immediately dug in, responding to Ellery’s challenge. After all, if a servant could handle the spicy lamb, so could they. Tevin watched as the guards chewed. The man’s face flushed, and they both broke out into a sweat. They weren’t quite crying, but they looked uncomfortable.
The guards grabbed for their wine, gulping it like water. The wine quickly gone, Ellery tutted in sympathy, grasping the metal pitcher of water the guards had with them. Ellery refilled their glasses with water twice before they finally slowed down.
“Perhaps the risotto?” Ellery spooned the creamy rice onto their plates. “No peppers in this one, promise.”
Which was precisely the moment the female guard collapsed forward, her cheek barely missing the risotto. The male guard stared at her for a moment, weaving slightly before he joined her, but he didn’t miss. Instead, his meaty head hit the plate with a muted squish. Ellery swiftly opened the door and gave a soft whistle. Kaiya and Amaury darted through the door, Ellery shutting it behind them. Their flamboyant outfits were gone, replaced by clothing fit for wedding guests. Ellery went to the guards and checked their pulses.
“I’m not sure how long they’ll be out,” the healer said. “I had to guess on the dosing, not knowing their precise weights. We should put them in a cell, just in case.” Amaury and Kaiya grabbed the man first, dragging him to one of the empty cells. Meanwhile, Ellery took the keys off the belt of the other guard, quickly flipping through them and trying each in the lock until one finally turned with a distinct click.
Tevin picked Ellery up, squeezed, and kissed them on the cheek.
“You’re not my type,” Ellery said dryly as they slid from Tevin’s grasp. “But I appreciate the enthusiasm. Better clean yourself up. We have a wedding to crash.”
Tevin quickly stripped out of his outfit, putting on the clothes brought for him and Val by Amaury. Kaiya dipped a cloth in the water pitcher, using it to wipe off Tevin’s makeup as best she could. “I won’t be able to get all of the kohl from around your eyes, but at least I can get the colorful stuff off. I wish we’d thought to bring some cold cream or something.”
Val had her weapons well in place by the time Tevin was back to his normal self. He eyed the group carefully. Everyone on the grounds knew what Tevin and Val looked like. The guards might be less vigilant now that they’d been captured, but they couldn’t count on that. What they needed was a disguise, but he couldn’t imagine one that would transform them enough to pass through.
Tevin looked at Amaury, who didn’t look worried in the least. “Oh no, we’re not doing plan B, are we?”
Amaury’s eyes lit. “We sure are.” He dug around in the pockets of his coat, fishing for something. “Your rescue took too long—don’t have time for anything else. We have to go straight to the ceremony.”
“What’s plan B?” Kaiya asked.
“B stands for Brazen,” Tevin said.
“Bold as Brass.” Val’s eyes were alight with a wicked gleam, and she practically rubbed her hands together in glee.
“Basically,” Tevin said, handing Val her hat, “we’re going to bluff our way in as best we can. I would argue, but I can’t think of anything else.” Either they’d save Merit, or interrupt the wedding she really did want, angering everyone involved and likely getting themselves thrown back into the dungeon. He could stand being in the dungeon; he could even stand Merit being mad at him, as long as she got what she wanted.
Val spread her arms, wiggling her fingers and rolling her head. “This is going to be fun.”
Amaury pulled a stack of paper from his pocket with a flourish. “Voilà!” He handed them out to the group. “We’re all wedding guests now.”
Tevin held his arms out for inspection so Ellery could check his finery and make sure he could pass for a guest, while Kaiya checked Val.
“Take out your lenses,” Amaury said, waving at Tevin’s face. “The guards have only seen you blond and blue-eyed. This will make them take at least a second to place you.”
“I’ve always wanted to go to a big posh wedding,” Val said, examining her invitation. “And this one is going to be even better, because we get to wreck it.”
Ellery stopped fussing with Tevin’s vest and looked at Val. They looked carefully at the excitement on e
veryone’s faces, shaking their head in dismay. “That’s it, they’ve ruined us. We’re all DuMonts now.”
Tevin reached out and tugged on Ellery’s hat brim. “I’m seeing that as a good thing.”
Amaury nodded. “DuMonts always win.”
“Always,” Tevin said firmly.
Val looked around, a frown on her face. “Hey, what happened to Hob and the ostrich?”
“The ostrich has been strategically placed,” Kaiya said, escorting Tevin confidentially down the hallway. “We couldn’t exactly move about with him unnoticed.”
“Strategic ostrich.” Amaury walked next to them, his stride telling everyone they passed that he belonged here and was every inch a fairy-blessed guest. “Probably the first time in his life that Cedric has been useful.”
Ellery, still in livery, held off to the side. They’d left the tray and dishes with the guards, but had stolen some flowers from one of the many vases they’d passed. The healer didn’t look at them, staring straight ahead as if they were on an important errand. That was the nice thing about livery—it made one practically invisible.
“And Hob?” Val asked.
“We don’t precisely know what happened to Hob,” Kaiya said, apparently completely unconcerned that a giant cat was wandering around the grounds.
“Couldn’t exactly tell the guards he was missing,” Amaury said. “That would draw attention. We decided that it was a problem for later.” Tevin wanted to argue with him, but his brother was right—there wasn’t anything they could do. They didn’t have much time as it was.
Amaury had memorized the map of Latimer’s castle, so had no problem taking them to the grand room where the wedding was taking place. As they got closer, they were joined by other guests, stragglers making it to the festivities at the last minute. They’d passed several guard checkpoints, making it past with a quick flash of the invitation. Kaiya was frowning at the lax security, but Tevin was grateful for it.
The last checkpoint was right outside the door, and those guards were of a different ilk. They were examining each invitation carefully. They were also scrutinizing faces.
Kaiya casually took Amaury’s arm. Tevin took Val’s, pretending not to know Kaiya or Amaury as they approached the guards. Amaury handed over his invitation—one that he’d purposely botched.
“This is a fake!” the guard said, her eyes wide.
Amaury stammered. “It is not. Don’t you know who I am?” Kaiya started wailing, which made Amaury yell louder. The lead guard wasn’t having any of it. She flicked her hand, and two of the guards departed, leaving her and a squat bald man with arms the size of hams. The two guards escorted Kaiya and Amaury away, both of them causing a maximum amount of fuss. The lead guard took their invitation right as Ellery stumbled and flowers went everywhere.
“I’m so sorry!” Ellery dropped down, grabbing for flowers, a constant stream of apologies flowing from their lips. They were dropping almost as many flowers as they picked up and kept knocking into waiting guests. The lead guard barely looked at Tevin as Val thrust the invitation at him while the ham-armed guard bent down to help Ellery with their flowers.
They were in.
* * *
• • •
In a mostly empty room in a different part of the castle, a beast paced in a gilded cage. Unhappy, the beast threw itself against the bars. It gnawed on the lock. Nothing happened except sore gums and a bruised side. The beast howled and howled, but no one came.
The door opened, and the beast looked up, expecting the people who had put it in the cage. Instead, the beast’s hackles rose, its lip curled back, and it snarled. Another predator sauntered in like it owned the place. The large cat, for his part, seemed disinterested in fighting. He ignored her growls and snarls. He flopped in front of the cage, as cats are wont to do, his tail slowly flicking back and forth. Oh, it’s you.
The beast whined.
The cat chuffed in response, the feline equivalent of, Well, what do you want me to do about it? I have my own curse to worry about.
The beast chirped.
The cat stared at the beast for a long, drawn-out moment before heaving itself up off the floor and sauntering over to the general area the beast had chirped at. His pace was slow—he was a cat, after all, and it wouldn’t do to hurry to do anyone’s bidding. It was bad enough to be doing it in the first place.
On the wall, on a hook above his head, hung a ring of keys. The cat stood and grabbed the ring with his teeth before dropping back down on all fours. He walked the ring over to the cage. The beast whined and clawed at the lock. It still had mind enough to know that it needed the keys to be free, but couldn’t quite remember how to use them.
It clawed at the key ring in the cat’s mouth, confused and trying to grasp the heavy ring, only to knock it free and onto the floor. It landed with a clang. The beast snarled in frustration.
The cat chuffed, bending down to scoop up the key ring with his teeth. This isn’t working, but I know someone who can help. The cat’s eyes narrowed. But this makes us even.
* * *
• • •
The room was mostly full already. Almost two hundred people in their best finery milled about, taking seats and chatting. It was so full it was already getting stuffy, so the guards were going along the tall windows and opening them up to let in a breeze. The hall itself was festooned with white silk garlands and white flowers. In the middle of the great rows of chairs, there was an aisle, a rich golden runner cutting up the middle. Every so often a golden birdcage hung off a wrought-iron holder, each one filled with white doves. Merit was nowhere in sight, though Tevin did see Willa, Diadora, and Glendon in one of the front rows.
“Now what?” Val said quietly as she smiled and nodded to a woman passing by.
“I honestly have no idea.” Tevin waved a greeting, pretending to recognize someone. “I didn’t think we’d get this far.”
Tevin quickly ushered Val to some open seats in a back row. “We’ll have to wait until they bring Merit out. I don’t think there’s any way to sneak around and find her before the ceremony—too easy to get lost or caught. But they’ll have to bring her out sometime, and then we’ll act.” He examined the room. “There are a lot of people in here. I’m glad we’re not trying to do this the sneaky way.”
“You think Amaury and Kaiya will have any trouble?” Val asked.
Tevin shook his head. “Only two guards? Please. We just have to be patient.”
“I hate being patient,” Val mumbled.
Finally a few trumpets blared and the king and queen strolled in, resplendent in their finery, her hand resting gently on his arm.
“They match the décor,” Val murmured. “Not very original.” The king wore a white suit, and his tie was made of a shimmery golden material. Angelique wore a puffy golden gown with a train so long that an attendant had to carry it for her. She looked like something out of a children’s book, a long strand of white pearls wrapped around her neck. Next came Lady Zarla, her dress a froth of creamy white lace and slim, elegant lines. Lady Zarla’s face was drawn, but she held her head high.
Once they were seated, everyone quieted, and the ceremony began. A choir sang some songs that Tevin didn’t really listen to. Then a bard sang a ballad that Tevin listened to very closely, mostly because it was full of overblown horse puckey about Latimer and how amazing he was to try to save Merit from her curse.
“I can hear you grinding your teeth,” Val whispered. “Relax.”
Other people spoke after that.
There were blessings.
He didn’t really hear any of them.
Tevin basically ignored everything until four men in white wheeled the cage up onto the dais. All in all, it was probably seven feet by six. The delicate bars were filigreed and beautiful—something fit for a queen, really. But it was still a cage, and inside it, the
beast paced. Any trace of Merit was gone. She padded about on all fours, snarling, her tail lashing back and forth. A low growl rumbled out as she spotted the crowd.
The cage was parked at the bottom of the dais, below the king and queen. The choir sang softly, a few of their voices wobbling when the beast snarled at them. A man in the front fainted and slid to the ground. A guard detached himself from the wall, grabbed the man’s shoulders, and dragged him off to the side. Light streamed through the large windows as if the heavens themselves blessed this charade.
Val placed a hand on his. “Not yet.”
The choir’s song grew louder, turning into an exultation. Everyone swiveled to gawk as the doors in the back flew open. Latimer strode in, several attendants following. He was so polished that he absolutely gleamed. Every inch of him looked like a fairy-tale prince, the savior of the beast the bard’s song talked about. Latimer’s gaze swept the crowd, his eyes catching for a second on Tevin, but he kept striding to the front.
“Pretty.” Val shook her head. “But sad. He has no friends to walk with him. No one to meet him at the end but a cursed bride and two toads for parents.”
“He saw us,” Tevin whispered.
“What?” Val’s eyes were round.
“He saw me and kept walking,” Tevin said.
“What does that mean, I wonder?” Val asked.
Tevin felt a surge of hope go through him. “I think he wants us to stop the wedding.”
“That’s crazy,” Val said.
Tevin watched as heads turned to follow the progress of the prince. “I don’t think we can trust him for help, but I don’t think he’ll get in our way, either.”
Latimer reached the dais, positioning himself across from the beast. The bard strummed his guitar, ready to start the next part of the story.