With Lily, he had taken her choices away and he lived with the regret of his decisions. It didn’t matter if he thought what he’d done was for the best, she hadn’t wanted that surgery. He’d taken her choice away and he hated himself for it.
He couldn’t, he wouldn’t, do that again.
He knew that in giving Avery a choice he risked losing her. She could decide her future shouldn’t be with him. But to bind her to him…he could lose her just the same. In fact, it might be far worse to have her at his side but have her close off her heart.
With a shake of his head, he closed his eyes. He might as well try and sleep. He had her next to him tonight.
By the next morning, a gentle rain fell, making the sky dark outside, but he woke to the feel of Avery stirring against him, soft and warm and making sleepy noises that made him come wide awake instantly.
“Morning,” her raspy voice tickled his ear. “How did you sleep?”
“Wonderfully. You?”
“Mhmm,” she answered, stretching against him.
He caressed the small of her back and over her behind, tracing the shape of her. Perhaps he could make love to her one more time…
A knock at the door interrupted his thoughts.
Avery stilled, her brows drawing together.
It sounded again. “Mrs. Everly?”
“Yes?” she answered, turning toward the door.
“There is a Duke of Devonhall here to see Lord Ivinhart.”
Noah groaned under his breath.
“All right,” Avery said, her eyes going wide.
“The only problem is that we can’t seem to locate his lordship.”
Avery nibbled at her lip while he kissed the tip of her nose. “Ewan’s returned and he’s brought backup. Bash is with him”
“Indeed.” She pushed back the covers and directed her voice toward the door. “Let me dress and I’ll help you find him.”
It took close to half an hour, but they dressed and started downstairs. They found Ewan, Bash, and Isabella in the front salon. Only Isabella smiled as she ran to her cousin to give her a hug.
Avery returned the gesture as Noah looked at the two men. “Good to see you, Bash.”
Bash gave a single nod. “And you, my friend. I see you and Avery made it safely from the city.”
Noah grimaced. “It was close. You were correct. Your house was being watched.”
Isabella gasped. “Were you attacked?”
“No,” Avery said with a smile. “But I did get my first lesson on scaling garden walls.”
Somehow everyone relaxed at those words.
“And the rest of the journey?” Bash stood straighter as he looked between the two of them.
“Uneventful, more or less,” Noah replied. Though it was a lie. He’d fallen in love. It was one of the greatest events of his life.
Bash gave a nod. “And wedding plans?”
Avery stepped forward. “There aren’t any. Yet.”
Bash straightened, a frown marring his face. “So I’ve heard.”
Avery notched her chin higher as she stared at the other man. “How could you make an agreement without me?”
A flicker of something flashed in Bash’s eyes. “There wasn’t time.”
“Why didn’t you send Ewan for me then?”
Bash winced. “I’d already made arrangements with Noah when I found Ewan at the docks. At that point, I didn’t even know you were still in the city.”
“But you knew where Noah was taking me. Obviously.” Her arms crossed. “Since he met us here. You could have sent Ewan after us so that I needn’t be forced into a match that wasn’t of my choosing.”
“Now, lass,” Ewan started.
“You stay out of it,” Avery snapped. “You’ve had your say. This is between me and Bash now.”
“And Noah.” Bash’s gaze flicked to his briefly. “Are you going to jump in here?”
Noah loved watching the strength behind her fragile façade. “Not a chance.”
“You’ll have to deal with me,” Avery fired back.
It was subtle but Noah watched Bash take a half-step back. “It had already been done, Avery. And with you married…”
“Go on…say it. With me married, you’d be free of the responsibility. The match was convenient for you. Did you think about me at all?”
Bash’s jaw turned to granite. “Of course I did. Noah is perfect for you. He’s kind and considerate while still being strong.”
Avery started in surprise as she looked at him, her gaze softening considerably. “He is. You’re right.” Then she drew in a breath. “Which is why—”
“Wait,” Noah said. “I’ve changed my mind. I am getting involved in this conversation.”
“About damn time,” Ewan grumbled.
Noah ignored the man, holding out his hand to Bash. “Do you have the contract? Avery should see it.”
Bash reached into his pocket. “Of course I do.”
He handed it to Noah who unfolded it. “Avery, on this paper, I promised to care for your needs, and use the club’s profits to create a dowry for you that you could assign to our children as you saw fit to ensure their futures were secure.”
She gasped, her hands coming to her chest to cover her heart. “Really? You were going to make certain our children could be independent? Even our daughters?”
“That’s right,” he answered. “I meant everything I said to you while we travelled here. Everyone should have the opportunity to manage their own destiny. But I didn’t count on falling in love with you.”
Her lips trembled as they pressed together.
He heard Isabella gasp behind them.
“If you’re in love,” Bash started, but Noah held out his hand for his friend to stop.
He drew in a deep breath. “I am. And that’s why I have to do this.”
And then he took the contract in his hand and tore it in half. Then he ripped it again. And again.
Avery’s eyes had grown wide. He reached for her hand, placing the ripped bits in her open palm. “The choice is yours.”
Chapter Fifteen
Avery’s gasp filled the room or perhaps that was just her own ears. Had he really just done that?
She’d been about to accept his proposal.
She stared down at the bits of paper in her hand, tears misting her eyes. “You tore it up.”
It was a ridiculous thing to say. Everyone was aware.
“I did,” he answered.
Bash cleared his throat, stepping forward. His voice boomed over the room. “It’s irrelevant—”
“Hush,” Isabella lifted her hand, gesturing for him to be quiet. “Now is not the time.”
Bash snapped his mouth shut despite the glare he cast at Noah.
But Avery only had eyes for Noah. Because not only did he love her, but he’d given her a great gift. The power to make her own future.
She took the bits of contract and tossed them into the air. They fluttered up and then began to fall all about them. “You understood all along,” she said as she reached for his hands.
“I did.” He cleared his throat. “Know that I will always care for you and I will always provide for your needs. No matter what your future holds, I’ll be here for you.”
She pulled him closer and then lifted on tiptoe, placing a soft kiss on his lips. “I know. That’s why I chose you.”
For a moment his eyes clouded with confusion but then they cleared. “You chose me?”
She nodded. No man would ever be better for her. “I accept your proposal. I want to be your wife.”
His brows rose and for a moment he just stared at her but then he lifted her, spinning her through the air.
And when his lips found hers, she melted into the kiss.
Bash let out a long sigh. “Thank the lord.” He grimaced at Isabella. “Please tell me our first child will be a boy. Girls would be the death of me.”
“I don’t know Bash. I come from a family of all women.” I
sabella laughed as she hugged her husband.
Ewan snorted. “Why fall in love and get married? It looks like a plague to me.”
But Avery didn’t bother to respond to any of them. She was too busy enjoying the feel of Noah’s arms. The way he held her tight made her feel both cherished and powerful.
He’d made all her dreams come true.
“I love you,” she whispered close to his ear.
“I love you too, Avery.” He lightly set her down. “When do you wish to wed? I’m sure Ewan will agree to chaperone while we post the banns and—”
While that was all lovely, in this moment, waiting weeks sounded dreadful. “I don’t want to wait that long.”
“Fine with me,” Ewan grunted. “I don’t want to spend a month with the world’s prickliest ward.”
“Any ideas then?” Noah asked. “We’re a ways from London in terms of getting a special license.”
Ewan chuckled. “I’ve got a ship in the harbor. We can marry at sea. As both her closest male relatives are here, the match will stand.”
Married at sea? How marvelous. “I’m going to need a new dress. I can’t get married in mourning weeds.”
He chuckled. “I think that can be arranged.”
Isabella clapped. “How fun this is going to be.”
Fun was one of many words Avery herself wished to use.
Meaningful.
Wonderful.
Fulfilling.
Perfect.
The next morning the small group set off just before the sun rose. In the end, they’d found a gown for Avery, a pale pink that reminded her of spring flowers in bloom. She felt lighter just for wearing it. This was her new beginning, the light after the dark.
They’d packed a wedding breakfast to take on the boat. Ewan, Bash, and Isabella joined them, to act as witnesses and the captain had agreed to officiate. As Avery stood on the deck, the sun shone bright orange on the horizon and she said her vows, tying herself, voluntarily, to the man she loved, forever.
Isabella stood to her right and Bash and Ewan on Noah’s other side.
And while she’d forged a beautiful new marriage with Noah, one she was so grateful for, she even said a bit of thanks that her cousin Ewan had been there too.
Her mother had lost contact with her sisters and if there was one silver lining in all that had happened over the past few years, it was that the cousins had come back together.
They were a family again.
The breakfast was served in the captain’s quarters and as Avery held Noah’s hand, she looked to Ewan. “Can I tell you something?”
“Of course,” he replied.
“I know you said yesterday that you thought love and marriage a plague.”
He shrugged. “I did. More or less.”
She smiled. “But I hope you find it, anyway.”
His face shuddered. “With all due respect, lass, ye don’t ken me.”
“I know. You didn’t know me either. It didn’t make you wrong.”
That made him smile. “I suppose ye’er right. And I maintain, yer bloody hard to argue with.”
She winked at him. “And remember this. Marriage and love, they don’t have to be a noose. In fact, they can be the reward.”
Ewan shook his head. “I wish I could believe ye.”
Noah leaned forward. “You know my past, Ewan. Enough anyhow. Trust me when I say if I can find joy in matrimony so can you.”
And then her new husband looked down at her, bending over to whisper in her ear. “You are my everything, my love. Your strength is only outmatched by your kindness. I hope Ewan takes your advice.”
“Me too,” she replied with a smile. “But even more than that, I’m glad that I found my way to you.”
He kissed her nose, then rubbed the tip of his against hers. “It was meant to be.”
“Forever.”
“Forever.”
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Laird of Longing is the next book in the series and includes a series epilogue that will leave you with clues for the future of the Lords of Scandal series. The book, however, is not up for pre-order because it’s in a multi-author set but it will release in July! Want to know as soon as it releases? Sign up for my newsletter here: http://www.tammyandresen.com/
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In the meantime, please check out the sneak peek of the new series I’m launching: Duke’s Dark Legacy. The first book, Her Wicked White will launch this June!
Her Wicked White
Duke’s Dark Legacy
Benedict White, Duke of Whitehaven, sat at his desk. Well, his father’s desk, or at least the large piece of mahogany furniture still felt that way to him. He stared at a freshly poured glass of whisky. Its amber color winked in the firelight as he gently swirled the contents.
What a fucking shit day it had been, and it was only ten in the morning.
“Are you going to drink that, love?” a woman said from the doorway, giving him a practiced smile.
He glared at the wench who’d interrupted his thoughts. He’d hired her the night before with the intent of fucking her in his father’s bed. He’d ended up leaving her in the room to sleep alone while he’d sat, most of the night, with his back against his own headboard an entire floor away.
Again, he supposed the master’s bedroom was now his, but either way, he’d left the wench in the that bedroom alone. It turned out he didn’t hate his father enough to actually go through with the plan.
And he hadn’t the heart to send the woman home in the rain. That particular decision hadn’t worn well in the light of day.
Not there was much light. A hard rain still fell and had soaked him near to the bone as he’d stood outside at his father’s funeral.
His gut clenched. He wasn’t mourning. That much was clear. Their relationship had been difficult at best. But he wasn’t happy either. A feeling he couldn’t quite square.
“Here’s your coin.” He gestured to a satchel on the desk.
She sauntered into the room, hips swaying as she looked him up and down. “You’re paying me for sleeping in that thick feather mattress alone?” Her mouth tipped into a sultry grin.
His jaw clenched so hard he thought his teeth might shatter. He’d never not bedded a woman before. It was damned odd, and he didn’t want to think about it, let alone discuss it with her. “Take your money and go.”
“There’s still time to do the deed.” She leaned forward, displaying what little cleavage she possessed. “You’re a very handsome man. I could enjoy a roll with one like you. Or a tup on the desk.”
His hand tightened around the glass. “Let me be clear. It’s time for you to go.”
She shrugged then. “What will people think? You inviting me here and then not…” She gave him a meaningful stare.
He stood then. She wasn’t the largest woman, and he was a tall man, more than six feet, his shoulders broader than most. He leaned over the desk, setting down his glass. “Are you threatening me?” His voice dropped low and deep. Her eyes widened and he pulled his lips tight over his teeth as he leaned closer. It had been a shit day and he was in no mood for whatever tricks she had in mind.
“Your Grace,” a second female said from the doorway. “Why don’t you send your friend off with a bit of extra coin for her trouble?”
He looked around the wench at his desk to his father’s second wife staring at him with her brows raised in a question. His father’s widow had to be younger than Ben. If he recalled correctly, the elder duke had decided to remarry after a decade of being alone. He’d picked the prettiest debutante of the season and wed her that spring. But the last Duke of Whitehaven had to have been thirty years older than his second wife.
Ben hadn’t attended the wedding; in fact he’d only been home once in the six years she’d been wed to his father. If he were honest, he didn’t even know the duchess’s name. Was telling his stepmother to fuck off appropriate?
But he kept his mouth shut and recogniz
ed that her suggestion made far more sense than intimidation, so he dug into his pocket and pulled out several more coins. Opening the satchel, he dropped them in and then extended his hand.
The wench took the coin, and with a smile, started for the door. “Your wife is very forgiving—and smart too.”
“I’m not his wife, dear.” The duchess said crossing her arms. “And you’d better leave before your mouth gets you into any more trouble.”
The other woman took the advice and with a final nod disappeared.
Ben returned to the seat and began staring into the glass of whisky once again. What the hell was wrong with him? He’d wished his father dead on multiple occasions. He’d only come here twice in the last ten years. Why should he be sullen now? He was finally free from his father’s tyrannical rule.
To be fair, he’d been free for years. His mother had left him a small amount of coin and Ben had used it wisely. He had a great affection and an even better eye for horseflesh. He’d used it to make a living among the elite.
The duchess walked into the room, the bottom of her soggy skirts dragging on the thick carpet.
She’d been the only other member of the family in attendance at the funeral, other than her five-year-old son. He ran his hand through his hair. His half-brother. What was the brat’s name again?
“We need to talk,” she said, taking the seat across from him.
He frowned, his eyes still on the glass. “Is it not apparent that I am not in a talking mood?”
She crossed her arms over her chest. A halo of blonde hair was expertly coiffed around her angelic features. Distantly, he recognized that she was an attractive woman. Odd, because he barely knew her, but she felt more like his sister than anything else. “If I caved to male blustering, I would have crumbled under your father’s iron rule years ago.”
His brows lifted and he had to confess, in that moment, he realized he’d underestimated this woman. She was excessively beautiful and rather well-endowed and he’d assumed that meant she was soft. “Fair enough.”
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