Truth be told, I wasn’t even sure I wanted it to.
Part of the reason why was on my other side, just itching to return fire.
“This would be a lot easier if we shot back,” Sally remarked, casually polishing the muzzle of her ridiculously oversized handgun as if bullets weren’t ricocheting around us.
“No!” Sheila turned toward us and paused, her eyes dropping to Sally’s big-ass Desert Eagle for a long moment. She was probably thinking the same thing I was: talk about fucking overkill. “We’re here to help these people, reassure them that the threat is over. That they no longer have to fear their loved ones being dragged off into the night.”
I couldn’t help but chuckle. “And who better to convince them than a bunch of weirdos wandering the streets after dark?”
Sheila’s aura flared up, and I scooted back until I bumped into Sally ... who unceremoniously shoved me away. “Personal space, dickhead.”
And yet I’d been happy, for God knows whatever reason, when her memories had been restored.
Sheila reeled her aura in before it could incinerate me. “We’re out here after dark because it was your idea to do this.”
Oh yeah, that.
♦ ♦ ♦
Following the fight with Vehron and subsequent escape by Calibra, AKA Ib the first vampire, we’d been stuck in a bit of a quagmire.
While we had some idea as to where she’d gone, we had no clue how to follow. And following her was at the top of our priority list. The stone-aged bitch had kidnapped my roommate Ed, along with James, Gan, my fucking DM Dave, and nearly everyone else who’d been in the Boston complex at the time. Some people just loved to make a dramatic exit.
Christy and her coven sisters were working on tracking Calibra, but that had left the rest of us to plant our thumbs squarely up our asses until then.
Sitting and waiting was simply out of the question. There was too much to do and I had far too much on my mind. There wasn’t even a working wet bar on the premises to keep me otherwise occupied.
Turns out I hadn’t been the only one antsy to do something.
The Templar who’d come up to Boston with Sheila had opted to return to the city streets. They had wanted to assess the damage Vehron had done during his rule here while also doing what they could to help anyone in need.
Though they’d professed their reasons to be entirely altruistic in nature, I had a feeling part of it was because they didn’t want to wait around in the former vampire stronghold of the northeast. Oddly enough, despite being humorless shitheads of the highest caliber, it was one area where the Templar and I saw eye to eye.
I’d approached Sheila with some of my own thoughts on helping out, hoping it would also serve to break the ice between us a bit. The Templar could hand out sandwiches wrapped in Bible tracts during the day, but the night probably required a slightly different approach. There were possibly still minions of Ib about, including packs of feral zombies set loose in Boston during Vehron’s reign.
Sheila had agreed with my reasoning and, after a measured pause, offered to accompany me. Score one! I’d been hoping it would give us a chance to talk. Our last conversation had ended with a nasty reminder that she and I were once again destined to decide the world’s fate by way of combat. Maybe it was crazy of me, but that sounded like something worth at least a brief chitchat.
Much to my surprise, though, Sally had cock-blocked that idea and volunteered to tag along.
She claimed boredom, but her eyes said otherwise. Though her mannerisms seemed normal on the outside, I got the feeling that even though she was back to being her old self, she also ... wasn’t. The way she’d acted upon her memories being returned hadn’t gone unnoticed. Her tone and demeanor had been apologetic, afraid – in short, decisively not Sally.
Alex had fucked with her mind but good. Yet another in a long string of incidents I owed that asshole for, with interest piling up daily. That a truce had been called between us probably didn’t mean much to either party involved.
None of that really helped our current situation, though. We’d been out for a couple of hours. Aside from a legless zombie we’d found in an alleyway, it had been slow. Slow and awkward, actually, with little more than small talk passing between us. Honestly, it was starting to piss me off.
Not exactly the dream date my subconscious insisted our threesome would be.
I’d almost rejoiced aloud when the sound of a heated argument drifted through the open window of a nearby brownstone. Needless to say, my enthusiasm had waned ever so slightly once the bullets started flying.
♦ ♦ ♦
We’d walked over to investigate, only to be greeted by an angry face peering out from a ground floor window. “Who the fuck are you?” he’d called out, a gun barrel pointing our way giving the question extra emphasis.
Sheila’s aura had sprung to life in response. Not surprising, but perhaps not the best move, as the look on the man’s face quickly turned to one of surprise and panic.
A hail of lead followed his cry of “It’s one of those freaks!”
Thank goodness there’d been some concrete pilings in the lot next door, an abandoned construction effort of some sort, or Sally and I would have ended the night picking bullets out of each other’s ass. Kinky, but not quite a fetish I’d like to explore.
♦ ♦ ♦
“So are we going to sit here all night?” Sally asked.
“Oh, I don’t know,” I replied. “It is a rather lovely evening.”
She rolled her eyes in disgust and looked past me at Sheila. “You’re the last defender of humanity. So do something before these fucktards need defending.” As if to emphasize her point, she checked the magazine of her gun before popping it back in.
The two locked eyes for a moment, glaring at each other as if I wasn’t even there, until Sheila broke contact and gave a single nod.
Before she could act, though, the gunfire ceased. “The whole neighborhood knows you freaks are out there,” the man called to us.
“No shit,” I whispered.
“If you want to live to see the next five minutes, throw any weapons out and then stand up. Nice and slow, and I’d better not see anything weird.”
“I think he means...”
“I know what he means,” Sheila hissed at me. She took a deep breath and the glow around her faded away.
“Yeah, well, fuck that shit,” Sally said. “If this asshole thinks we’re going to stand up and give him free potshots at us, he’s...” She trailed off and cocked her head to the side.
“Finally realized the point of this wasn’t a killing spree?” I asked.
“No, stupid,” she snapped. “Listen.”
That was easier said than done with my ears still ringing. It was probably only a matter of seconds before Doc Holliday there decided to go all O.K. Corral on us again, but I tried anyway.
Sally was right. Footsteps. No, not just footsteps ... feet marching in rhythm, a lot of them.
“What’s wrong?” Sheila asked.
“We’re not alone,” I said a moment before two columns of cops in riot gear came double-timing it toward us from either end of the block. About half were armed with assault rifles, while the rest...
Wait. Definitely not the police. Their uniforms were unmarked, completely black. Also, unless I’d missed something, silver stakes weren’t standard issue for police.
Vampires.
They quickly encircled us, but from a distance – no doubt aware that getting too close to the Icon was a bad way to end one’s night. Their weapons were at standby, but the meaning was clear. They could turn us into Swiss cheese before we could so much as scratch our asses.
One of them stepped forward toward the house, hands raised. “Please stand down. We have the situation under control.”
“I don’t want any trouble,” the man called from inside, his voice finally cracking and betraying the fear beneath.
�
�And I can assure you, neither do we,” someone answered from behind the line of vamps.
Oh no. Not him!
“Son of a bitch,” Sally spat, lowering her weapon.
The line of armed vampire guards parted to reveal a familiar greasy countenance draped in an overpriced suit.
Colin smiled as he approached, a look of utmost smugness etched upon his face that had me wishing his men had opened fire on us instead.
Surely that would have been the kinder fate.
Dickheads Anonymous
I expected Colin to order us to our knees and have us cuffed before being led away. All the while, that insufferable smirk of his would be practically begging for someone to wipe it off his stupid fucking face with a high caliber bullet.
I could tell Sally was thinking about it. Honestly, if she’d tried, I don’t know that I would have made any attempt to stop her.
Oh, who was I kidding? I’d have helped her aim.
“Relinquish your weapons and come with us, please,” Colin said.
I wasn’t packing, having expected this to be a mission of mercy, but Sally was, and Sheila had her +5 sword of vamp-incineration. Two of Colin’s men stepped toward us expectantly.
Now that the gunfire had ceased, I eased myself back to my feet, hoping the crazies in the house didn’t decide to change their minds.
My two compatriots followed. One of the vamps in Colin’s hit squad held out his hand to Sally. She glared at him for a moment, then turned over her hand cannon with a sigh of disgust. “I want that back.”
The second guard was a bit more hesitant. I couldn’t blame him. His buddy had been tasked with disarming a volatile but still relatively young vampire. He, on the other hand, had drawn the short straw and had to deal with someone who could vaporize him with barely any effort.
Sheila, for her part, didn’t seem overly inclined to hand over the weapon, instead looking around and taking stock of our situation.
“If it will make you feel any better,” Colin said after a beat, “hand it to the Freewill. I’ve seen him in action and doubt he would be a threat to any save himself.”
Telling Colin to take a long suck on a hard dick was my response of choice, but I instead turned to Sheila. “I won’t let anyone else touch it. I promise.”
Hah! I wasn’t even sure I could touch it. Grabbing hold of it was like putting one’s hands on a lit stove. Still, if it would keep us from being peppered with lead, I could risk the singed fingers.
We locked eyes and I offered my most sincere smile. Finally, she nodded, unbuckled the weapon from her waist, and held it out to me.
It was my turn to hesitate as I braced myself for the ouchies sure to come.
Thankfully, touching the leather of the scabbard wasn’t the same as grabbing hold of the grip. I felt a slight tingle of warmth in my fingers, but that was it.
I let out a deep breath and turned to find Colin wearing a look that spoke of disappointment. Asshole.
His troops encircled us and led us away, back in the direction of the Boston headquarters. We’d only come a few blocks west before running into trouble, so there apparently wasn’t a need to usher us into the back of a squad car.
I noticed about a third of the vamps remained behind as we left.
“Please tell me you’re not cleaning up any loose ends,” I said loudly enough to get Colin’s attention at the forefront of our column. “This was our fault. Those people didn’t ask to get sucked into this.”
“As I am well aware,” he replied without turning to face us. “My men have orders to disarm them. Afterwards, they are to provide them and their neighbors with assurances that order is being restored as well as any supplies they might need.”
Wait, that’s what we were out here doing. I glanced to either side. The faces of my two female companions registered the same doubt I was feeling.
“Seriously?”
Colin stopped, causing the entire column to halt. He turned and marched back our way ... albeit, he left plenty of space between us, more than enough for us to get the shit shot out of our asses if we made a move. “I am entirely serious, Freewill. You may not believe this, but the Destroyer caused grievous harm to this city and our presence within it, a presence we have carefully cultivated for over three centuries. It is my duty to reestablish some semblance of order here, and I can’t very well do that by executing the citizenry. Tomorrow, those people will talk to their friends and they in turn will talk to theirs. Soon, the rumor mill will be flush with whispers of normalcy returning. That will, in turn, strengthen the effort to reestablish the former leadership and constabulary.”
I blinked stupidly in the face of this all, not having expected the Draculas to do much more than repair the car wash that served as the outside façade of their underground complex.
“So you’re actually trying to get things back to normal?” Sheila asked.
“Yes. At least until the First are victorious in their war effort,” he said before turning around and continuing on. “After that, we shall most likely assume a slightly more proactive stance in our managerial strategies.”
♦ ♦ ♦
It didn’t take us long to get back to the car wash. As we approached, Colin made a hand gesture, and the remaining guards split off in different directions, leaving us alone with him.
“Someone’s feeling brave,” Sally commented.
“Our façade of normalcy must be rebuilt. There is much work to be done here, but the sooner we can convince the residents that nothing is amiss, the better. That includes reestablishing the belief that this complex is nothing more than it appears. We can’t very well accomplish that if it is painfully obvious we are housing a significant strike force.” He turned and smirked over his shoulder. “To answer your charge, bravery assumes one is feeling threatened. I can assure you, my dearest Lucinda, that I feel anything but in your or the Freewill’s presence.”
“You fucking...”
“Lucinda?” Sheila asked.
“Ah yes,” Colin continued. “I would also remind you, Icon, that the truce Lord Alexander graciously allowed is still in place. Assuming, of course, no overt hostilities are undertaken against emissaries of the First ... such as myself.”
Sheila shrugged. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”
“I am pleased to hear that.” He pulled a flip phone out of his jacket pocket, opened it, and punched a few buttons.
“Good luck getting service these days,” I said.
“Our private cell towers have been reactivated,” he replied dismissively before speaking a few words and ending the call.
God, what a smug prick. I couldn’t help but feel especially peeved. We’d done all the work, shed all the blood, and suffered losses as a result. In the end, it had been close, but – thanks to Gan – I managed to blow Vehron’s head off long enough for the rest of his body to get the hint. Despite that, it hadn’t been much of a victory as we’d then had to deal with his master, the queen bitch of all vampires.
All of that, only for this brown-nosing cocksucker to waltz in and declare he was resuming command without so much as lifting a finger.
Oh, how nice it would be to shit stomp this fucker. As much as I was admittedly a fan of nasty, sweaty sex, fucking this guy up with present company might make for an even more satisfying threesome.
Unfortunately, that wasn’t going to happen, no matter how much I might want it. Colin was right about the truce. As big of a swinging dick as Alex was, there was too much at stake for us to risk breaking it – at least until a time of our choosing. At that point, well, whatever happened next definitely wouldn’t be boring.
The battered exterior of the wash loomed ahead of us. One side had an odd cant to it as if something beneath the surface had collapsed. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that the Prefect’s office lay somewhere directly below it.
My attention was quickly diverted, however, to the main entrance of the wash’s office. T
he door opened with a jingle. Jesus, they even had a bell on it.
Several figures stepped out. My vampire night vision compensated for the darkness, and I saw it was Christy and her small coven of witches. An unfamiliar figure, probably a vampire, escorted them out. He gave them a friendly wave, said, “Thank you, come again!” and then shut the door behind them.
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
Colin smiled in return. “As I said, Freewill, the façade must be maintained.”
“At two in the morning?”
“We keep late hours. It’s done wonders against the competition.”
Back to the Big Apple
“You’re kicking us out?”
“Of course,” Colin replied as if I’d asked a particularly dull-witted question. “If I am interpreting Lord Alexander’s dictate correctly, and I assure you I am, our cease fire stipulates that we will suspend hostilities against one another, share in pertinent information, and strike jointly against our enemy when the time is right. It’s possible my memory fails me, but I don’t seem to recall anything about cohabitation. If it helps, though, there are several inexpensive motels within the city limits. Perhaps I can find you some coupons for a complimentary continental breakfast.”
I opened my mouth to respond, but Sally was quicker. “It’s fine. Too many cockroaches in this place anyway. Wouldn’t want any of them trying to crawl into bed with me.”
“I can assure you, my dear, that even cockroaches have standards.”
Oh, crap. I stepped between him and Sally before she could make a move that would get us all gunned down. Despite appearing to be alone, it was foolish to believe he didn’t have eyeballs on us.
It was all for naught, though. Sally didn’t even flinch in his direction. She merely turned her back. Yeah, something was definitely up with her. First she’d asked for permission to fire back at a trigger-happy human, and now she wasn’t even pretending to want to take a slice out of this greaseball.
However, now was not the time to discuss things. Besides, I sure as shit wasn’t about to let my guard down while Colin was within earshot. Instead, I comforted myself in the knowledge that if things somehow worked out in our favor – resulting in the deaths of both Ib and Alex – then that would surely at least inconvenience Colin. And, if not, then we’d be dead, in which case we wouldn’t ever have to listen to him again.
The Tome of Bill Series: Books 5-8 (Goddamned Freaky Monsters, Half A Prayer, The Wicked Dead, The Last Coven) Page 126