by Anne Morice
So it came almost as a relief when she offered to show me round the house, with a view to pointing out the various improvements she had made, and when Robin and Toby had been loudly forbidden to accompany us and complied with who knew what reluctance, we set off on our tour.
As it happened, I had only seen one or two of the downstairs rooms during the Griswold era, so the interest in Lulu’s innovations was not overpowering, although I was able to assure her with total sincerity that they would have earned the unqualified approval of Sylvia. However, there was one new addition which inspired ungrudging admiration and this was an extra bathroom which had been converted out of one of the larger bedrooms. It was a positive palace of a bathroom, fitted with every plumbing gadget known to man, and I stood lost in wonder while she expatiated on the dimensions of the bath, drew my attention to the thick pile carpet, which was guaranteed splash-proof, and slid back one after another of the cupboard doors to reveal the richness of sheets and bath towels within.
This being the climax of the expedition, we then returned to the drawing-room, where Toby instantly rose to his feet, saying that Mrs Parkes became very touchy if the dinner was kept waiting. It was only a half truth because Mrs Parkes also became very touchy if the dinner was not kept waiting, but it served its purpose and we got away after only five minutes of argument.
Lying in bed a few hours later and unable to sleep because of the conglomeration of thoughts and memories, I found the process of tidying them up being constantly interfered with by images of poor Lulu in her hopeless quest to make a hubby out of Toby. Scraps of her conversation kept inserting themselves between me and the main theme until I finally gave up and took myself, step by step and word by word, through the forty minutes we had spent in her house, in order to expunge them conclusively. In doing so, I naturally fell asleep.
There followed dreams of terrifying and chaotic order, and at one moment, against all the advice of the shadowy characters in the background, I was decking myself out in a tiara, to go on a picnic; but then suddenly I was in Lulu’s bathroom, being sucked down by her splash-proof carpet, which had turned into green quicksand. They had all gone to the picnic without me and I woke up yelling. Instantly a shutter clicked in my brain and the picture cleared. So I went on yelling until I had woken Robin as well.
‘You’ve got to get up,’ I said. ‘Now, this minute. It’s terribly urgent. Please, Robin, do as I say. I’ll explain afterwards.’
‘Okay, okay, but where’s the fire?’
‘At the Rectory. Go down and telephone Mackenzie. Tell him to meet us there as quick as he can. They’ll part with his home number if you do it.’
To my intense relief and gratitude, he did not argue, but pulled on a dressing-gown and blearily groped under the bed for his slippers.
‘Oh, and Robin,’ I called out, as he shuffled to the door, ‘tell him to bring his best safe-blower and lock-picker with him.’
He asked no questions and twenty minutes later I was blinded by the glare of headlights as he brought the car up to the gate. On the way down to Storhampton I told him what I expected to find.
They had to break the door down because, after several abortive attempts, D.C. Ramsay admitted defeat, complaining that this particular lock had that little bit extra.
‘It’s a special one which the insurance company forced on them,’ I explained to Robin. ‘They used to keep the key on that ledge above the door, which rather defeated the object, but naturally it’s not there now.’
‘Stand back, please!’ Mackenzie warned, doing so himself, as two of his henchmen went into action.
When they had smashed the lock they pulled the door outwards, which was just as well because Albert was lying with his head against it, and what little life remained to him would certainly have been snuffed out if it had collapsed on top of him. As it was, he was unconscious, but still breathing. At one point, he must have clawed at the shelves, in his despairing fight against suffocation, for some sheets and pillowcases had slid out and were tumbled about his legs.
They dragged him on to the landing and I peered into the dark interior and saw that the safe door was open. Then Robin went downstairs to telephone for an ambulance, while Mackenzie rasped out some instructions and set the wheels in motion for the pouncing and apprehending part.
XIX
‘He was a strange man, all right,’ I remarked. ‘And never more so than yesterday, at Betsy’s funeral. That was the first time I’d seen the mood turn violent.’
We were driving up the M4 as I spoke, all three of us in the front seat of Toby’s Mercedes, having formed ourselves into a welcoming committee for Ellen.
‘Violent?’ Toby repeated. ‘Nobody told me that. In what way?’
‘It was half jokey, but there was an underlying violence. I am sorry to keep repeating it, but it is the only word. I think he had begun to see me as a threat and in some corner of his black heart he really wanted to kill me.’
‘And yet, so far as he was aware, you’d done nothing to arouse such wild passions?’
‘I know, Toby, but he always reacted instinctively, at any rate where women were concerned. He was so good-looking and attractive, when he set out to be, and he went through life using women to get exactly what he wanted, until I suppose he began to feel he had such power over them that he could literally get away with murder. It must have been a ghastly shock when things began to go wrong, and perhaps he associated me with it in some way; but of course the real trouble was that the one for whom the whole plot had been devised was so obviously casting her net elsewhere.’
Robin had been silent for several minutes, but, corresponding with this, I had become conscious of a sensation of overcrowding on my left, as though he had literally swelled up by several pounds since leaving the house, and he now burst out:
‘Can we be speaking of the same man? What’s all this about wanting to kill you and being so attractive? It’s the first I’ve heard of it.’
‘But he was, you know, Robin. Men could never see it, but women fell for him in vanloads, even tough old Maud. And, before you tell me she was in her dotage, how about Maureen? She was dishy enough, by anyone’s standards.’
‘I’ll have to take your word for it. Personally, I always found him a conceited bore, and stupid with it. And when did he try to kill you, I should like to know?’
‘I didn’t say that exactly, but I swear there was a latent murderous instinct at work. He stuck his leg out and tried to trip me up. I don’t pretend for a moment that it would have been curtains if I’d fallen, or even that he had that consciously in mind, but I was wearing dark glasses and I could have come one hell of a cropper on that stone floor.’ Toby said: ‘Perhaps we should be charitable and write it off as nervous tension. I suppose Albert was already in the linen cupboard by this time, which must have been quite a worry.’
‘Yes, he was. Margot had spoken to Jasper about the pearl necklace before Betsy’s funeral, and he must have seen his chance. He pretended to be completely indifferent about it, but in fact he asked Albert right away to go and fetch it. Then he followed him upstairs, in his sneakers, and as soon as Albert had his back turned and was fiddling with the safe, he slammed the door on him, afterwards putting it about that he’d given him the day off.’
‘Very cool,’ Toby said. ‘Is this where we turn off, or the next one?’
‘The next one. We’re still in Slough, believe it or not. Yes, it was cool, but you could tell he was a bag of nerves underneath. Luckily for him the Rectory had been constructed as a Victorian version of a medieval fortress, but still he must have been scared stiff that someone would hear Albert banging and shouting, even through those solid old walls. He couldn’t wait for everyone to go, and the situation was made quite intolerable by the fact that Maureen was flashing her eyes at everyone but him. That could have been an act, but she looked to me like someone who goes around collecting scalps, and I bet she’s now ditched old Jasper, hasn’t she?’
‘Yes
. She admits to collaborating with him, but she insists that the milk only contained some perfectly harmless sedative. She maintains that the purpose of it, so far as she knew, was simply to ensure that Betsy fell into a deep enough sleep to enable her to desert her post for a couple of hours and visit Jasper at the Stables. Nothing will shake her on that, and I think she may well get away with it. Jasper will carry the can.’
‘It’s maddening really, Robin, because although she may not have committed any crime, I’ll bet you anything she put him up to it. She was an essential cog and she must have realised what the plan was.’
‘Which is more than I do,’ Toby said, pulling over into the slow lane, as the airport sign loomed up on our left. ‘Are we now saying that the milk was supposed to finish off Maudie, after all?’
‘Certainly we are. It’s highly unlikely that the dose was strong enough to kill Betsy. In fact, the last thing they wanted was for her to die first. Maureen’s job was to throw some extra salt into the soup on Maud’s dinner tray, not enough to put her off completely, just to bring on a raging thirst an hour or two later, and then beat it over to the Stables. Of course she’d now deny all the bit about the salt, but Betsy mentioned it right at the beginning. They ran the slight risk that if Dr Macintosh had found out that Maureen had abandoned his patient he’d have fired her on the spot, but Betsy was the last person to raise a rumpus of that kind. In fact, she secretly welcomed the chance to wait on Maud herself.’
‘It was a neat plan,’ Robin admitted, ‘because if Maud’s death had been investigated, all the evidence would have pointed to the milk being intended for Betsy. It wouldn’t have done her any permanent harm if she’d drunk it, and furthermore Jasper hadn’t the shred of a motive for murdering her. She not only allowed him perfect freedom to go his own way, but she was a comparatively poor woman at that time.’
‘Where I made my mistake,’ I confessed, ‘was in insisting that he still had no motive when she became a rich one. We all knew that Jasper had only to ask and she would have handed over the lot.’
‘But you had reckoned without Maureen?’
We were grinding through the Heathrow tunnel as Toby spoke, and his voice came out in a muffled roar.
‘Too true,’ I yelled back, then dropped my voice by a few hundred decibels as we shot into the sunlight again. ‘Maureen was out for wedding bells, and even Betsy might have jibbed at handing out a quarter of a million with one hand and divorce papers with the other. She closed her eyes to a hell of a lot where Jasper was concerned, but losing him was the one thing she wouldn’t tolerate.’
‘And where did Digby’s little jape fit into all this, I wonder? By the way, which building are we supposed to go to? Did anyone remember to find out?’
‘Tunisia is in Africa,’ Robin told him. ‘So Inter-Continental might be worth a try.’
‘Oh, bother! That’s my unfavourite one. Shall I be copped if I park here? Oh dear me, yes, just look at it! The whole place absolutely ringed with policemen. Can’t you use your influence, Robin?’
‘No, I’ll do better than that. I’ll drive it round to a car park for you. You and Tessa go in and get yourselves a bun. I’ll find you upstairs.’
‘What was Digby’s part?’ Toby asked again, when we had found a vacant bench in the Arrivals section. ‘Or don’t you know.’
‘Yes, I do, but it wasn’t a very heroic one. Digby was a mere tool.’
‘Who for?’
‘His brother. Before she got around to the implications of it, Betsy had been dropping hints that Maud’s tape-recordings contained all sorts of scandalous indiscretions and Piers couldn’t wait to get his hands on them. Unfortunately for him, as soon as Maud died Betsy saw the red light and locked them all away, pretending they’d been lost.’
‘Very teasing of her!’
‘Very much in character, though. Everything had to be sweetness and light in Betsy’s life, with no unpleasantness such as libel suits to spoil things. Anyway, her covering-up manoeuvre didn’t quite work out that time, because Piers came on the tapes quite by chance. He was looking for a dressing-gown for Sophie and he discovered that Betsy’s wardrobe was locked. That must have put the bit between his teeth, because he forced it open and there they all were. However, he couldn’t very well march downstairs carrying them in his arms and risk running slap into Betsy in the hall, so he had to make another plan. Never being one to do his own dirty work if it could be avoided, he collared Digby and passed on the instructions to him. After that he went back and sat with Sophie, presumably to shoo away anyone who might have come into the room, and also to ensure, if he could, that she was fast asleep before Digby came back with the ladder.’
‘He was foiled, however?’
‘Perhaps Sophie wasn’t quite asleep, after all, and caught Digby in the act, or perhaps he lost his nerve at the last minute. Personally, I think it was foolhardy of Piers to leave the job to him. He’s obviously destined to go through life making a hash of everything he touches.’
‘Anyway, that clears up the mystery of the tape recordings?’
‘Well, not quite, because there was still one tin unaccounted for, which Betsy knew nothing about, and that was the one Albert had swiped in advance. It had nothing to do with Maud’s scandalous revelations, what’s more.’
‘Really, Tessa, you have been busy! No wonder the mere sight of you was beginning to get on Jasper’s nerves. It surprises me that you didn’t get shut in a linen cupboard yourself.’
‘Oh, I expect I’d have been next in line. He was getting well into his stride in mowing down anyone who stood in his path: but it was first things first and Albert presented the main threat at that time.’
‘Because Jasper’s voice was on the same tape with Maud dictating her new will to Gerald? Isn’t that your theory?’
‘It was once upon a time, but I’ve changed my mind since then. As Robin pointed out, it wouldn’t have proved conclusively that he’d overheard the lot. No, I think this one contained a far more damaging piece of evidence, and it was probably recorded weeks ago, before everyone got into the habit of remembering that Maud was liable to leave it switched on, whether she was using it or not. And can you guess what was on it, Toby?’
‘No, but I’m sure you would love to tell me and stun me with your cleverness, so you have my permission to do so.’
‘It wasn’t all that clever; more a stroke of luck, because I had sources of information which were denied to poor old Mackenzie, and one of them was Mr Jackie.’
‘There now, you’ve done it! I am veritably stunned.’
‘Yes, but you see, one of the most puzzling elements and one which none of us ever concentrated on enough was what made Maud change her will at all and leave everything to Betsy? None of them expected it, least of all Betsy herself, and that tight-lipped Margot was so utterly fazed that she lost all control and behaved in a most unladylike fashion. So obviously she had nothing on her conscience, and the question remained: why had Maud done it?’
‘I hope you’re not asking me to believe that Mr Jackie supplied the answer?’
‘Only inadvertently, but he showed me how Jasper could have gone to work. Getting the will changed in Betsy’s favour was the first move in his game and, once he’d accomplished that, everything else followed. Did you know that Maud was practically bald?’
‘No, I can’t say I did.’
‘Nor did anyone else, except Betsy and Mr Jackie. It was a closely guarded secret and Maud would have broken off relations instantly, if either of them had given it away. But, you see, Toby, just recently there must have been one other person who knew all about it.’
‘We’re back with the dreaded Maureen?’
‘Yes. That would be one secret you couldn’t keep from a nurse, wouldn’t it? Specially a night nurse.’
‘And Maureen passed the news on to Jasper?’
‘Right. It was all he needed.’
‘Oh, come, come, Tessa! You’re not telling me that he marched up to
her and said: “I know it’s a wig and unless you change your will and leave it all to my wife I shall ring up the Daily Express this very minute”?’
‘No, not at all; nothing so crude. It so happens that Margot goes to the same hairdresser. All Jasper had to do was to tell Maud that he’d heard about her secret from some acquaintance in London and that Margot was giving out the news at every party she went to and getting a great big laugh, etc.’
‘Well, you astound me. What a caddish trick! Really, I begin to feel quite glad they’ve caught him. One could never say where that kind of thing would end.’
‘And I bet he got a great kick out of dealing Maudie such a death blow and doing Margot down in the same stroke. He always hated her and he was terribly spiteful.’
‘Poor old Margot! Still we don’t mind too much about her, do we?’
‘Not too much, no.’
‘Robin’s taking his time, isn’t he? I hope he hasn’t been arrested.’
‘More likely spinning it out on purpose. He’s heard it all before and we have to remember that, however enthralling to you and me, all this kind of thing is rather a busman’s holiday for him.’
‘I expect you’re right. Did Albert realise that this charming conversation had been recorded, and use it for blackmail?’
‘Correct. He’d trained himself to be rather more observant, in small ways, than the average person. He may have overheard part of it and, when he realised the machine had been running, he pinched the tape and kept it for a rainy day. Unfortunately he couldn’t play it back on Maud’s machine, because Margot had chucked that out during her transports of grief, but on the day of the funeral, when everyone was safely occupied elsewhere, he concealed it in a bunch of flowers and took it over to the Stables, knowing that Jasper’s workshop was piled high with every sort of recording device. And how he must have congratulated himself on picking up such a little gem! Poor Albert! Not a very noble character, but personally I’d say he’d been punished enough. It can’t have been much fun, shut up in that ghastly linen cupboard and knowing it might be days or even weeks before anyone found you. Even if his wife had got worried, she’d have been reluctant to drag the police in, seeing what they’d both been up to all these years.’