by Sarah Bailey
That’s right, my little witch, you belong by my side. Now and always. Mine. You belong to me.
He’d already spent enough time away from her. His need for her would never be sated.
“Dad, she’s going to be pissed when I tell her,” she said.
“Do you expect anything less from your mother?” Gallian replied.
“No. I never felt connected to the fae so it doesn’t matter. It’s just I won’t be able to come back until it’s blown over.”
She looked up at Lucifer, her eyes full of hesitation. This is why he wanted to be by her side. No matter how strong and assured she was, Candace was still fragile inside. She’d been denied her parents’ affection and approval for so long.
He’d begun to understand what drove her. The feelings of neglect and hurt which rested deep inside her soul. She’d told him she saw all his damaged parts. He saw hers too. And yet they loved each other all the same. He’d have the courage to tell her soon. When he knew she’d given up the last of her ties to this world for him.
“I won’t be able to return to Earth for the foreseeable if I do this,” she finished.
“Is this your way of telling me you’ve agreed to return to Hell?” her father asked.
She turned to him. Lucifer could see her fingers tightening around the mug.
She’s preparing herself for his disappointment. Fuck.
He wanted to soothe away her fears. Teach her that she was worthy. That she didn’t need her father’s approval.
“You know how I feel, Dad. I want… I need…”
His hand tightened around her waist.
You can do this. You can tell him the truth, my little witch.
“I’m choosing this because it’s what I want. No one is forcing me. I want my life to be my own for once. Without all the expectations and duties hanging over my head.”
She trembled. He could feel her conviction flooding through her veins. He’d asked her to stay, made her promise not to leave him, but it wasn’t with force. He needed her willingness and she’d given it to him. Given him everything. And he’d give her all he was in return when she came home free of the shackles keeping her tethered to Earth.
“Candace, I only wish you to have your heart’s desire. I told you yesterday, I will do anything in my power to make up for bargaining with your life.”
The urge to growl and rip her father a new one drove through him. Only the woman anchored to his side stopped him. Her father had sold his own daughter’s life, but he was also the only family Candace would have left who cared for her.
Her eyes snapped to his as if she could feel tension radiating off him. She wanted access into his thoughts. Her expression told him that much. He wasn’t about to kiss her in front of her father. He’d break and want to take out his anger on her delicate skin.
Red, hot, painful lust spiked in his blood.
Fuck. She has no fucking clue how much I need to use her, hurt her, ruin her. Fuck, I shouldn’t take out my pain on her.
Pain. It lanced through his chest. The pain of never being able to return to Heaven. The pain of being cast out for wanting freedom. The pain of the shackles his father had placed on him when he’d been consigned to rule Hell. All of it sliced through him, threatening to overflow.
What the fuck is this?
It had been a long time since he’d felt anything but rage, hatred and a need for revenge when it came to his father.
Candace’s expression softened. She reached up, placing her hand on his heart for a moment. Her eyes said ‘I know you’re suffering with things I can’t change but let me love you and share your burdens’.
Fuck if it doesn’t make me more aware of how much I don’t deserve her and how much I love her all the same.
She knew the pain of parental disappointment. And she’d willingly sacrificed her life to belong to him. He held something so precious, so unbelievably pure of sins.
It was then he knew.
When Candace faded from this world, his father would take her away from him because her soul, which she’d given to Lucifer, belonged in Heaven.
Despite all the pain he felt at the loss of his home and his father’s approval, he knew losing her would be the worst fucking pain of all. It almost robbed him of his control and his anger at his father threatened to spill over.
“Lucifer, I’m here, stay with me,” she whispered.
Her voice shattered him. She had no clue how dark his thoughts were yet her words were exactly what he needed.
She’s here and she’s mine.
He shook himself, dispelling the violence locked inside him. The need to destroy his father dulled.
He brushed her hair from her cheek, giving her a haunted smile. Her tentative returning one spoke volumes. She wasn’t going to rest until she’d torn his pain to shreds and made him admit to what tormented his very existence.
She is more terrifying than any sort of punishment my Father might exact. She has the power to ruin me if she leaves me. She’ll break my heart.
No one had ever had such power over him before. He could only hope her love for him was enough to keep her by his side.
He turned back to her father. Gallian’s expression held curiosity and understanding. As if he realised what tethered Lucifer to his daughter.
Love.
Would it keep her father happy, knowing Candace was everything to him?
Gallian stood, walking over and placing his mug on the dining room table. He took the mug from Candace and placed it next to his. Taking her shoulders in his hands, he smiled at her.
“You’ll have some way of staying in contact with me.”
He looked over at Lucifer who nodded his assent. Now the portals had reopened, there was nothing standing in the way of her talking to her father.
“Then I’ll be content in the knowledge that you’re safe with him.”
He leant down, placing a light kiss to his daughter’s forehead.
“I love you, my child. I will always be proud of you. Remember what I said about everything yesterday. You’ll work out what it means for you.”
Lucifer frowned, unsure of what Gallian was referring to, but Candace seemed to know.
“Thank you, Dad. I love you too.”
§
Candace sat in the corner of Fright Night with Jax. Both of them were silent. He eyed the vampires in the bar with irritation.
“Say something, Jax.”
“What do you want me to say? First, you tell me you’re going to marry some fae prince and we won’t be able to see each other often and now, you’re telling me you’ve fallen in love with the Devil and you’re going to return to Hell, permanently. What the fuck do I say to that?”
She flinched, wishing she hadn’t told Lucifer she’d be okay seeing Jax alone.
I knew he’d be pissed, but now I just feel like the world’s worst friend.
She’d tried her best to explain everything to him in a way he might understand.
“I thought you’d be happy I was finally honest with you.”
“Happy? I’m not fucking happy. You’ve avoided me since we returned to Earth and now you drop that bombshell on me like it’s no big deal.”
“I never said it wasn’t a big deal,” she muttered.
She knew telling Jax wasn’t going to be easy, but the way he looked at her as if she’d completely torn him to shreds made her heart ache. There was nothing more she wanted than for all of this to go away and for them to go back to the way they’d always been. She knew that would never happen, not after he’d sent her to Hell. The vast chasm between them widened significantly.
“I don’t understand how you can give up your entire life, everything you’ve ever known for… him.”
Is that how he saw it? Her giving up everything? That was ridiculous. She’d made this choice by herself. Even if Lucifer had asked her to stay with him in Hell a thousand times over, it wouldn’t have mattered if she hadn’t wanted to. She wasn’t giving up anything. She
was gaining everything she never knew she needed. A man who was so complex it gave her whiplash with his ever changing moods. She accepted Lucifer for all he was regardless. Loved him for it. She still had so much to learn about what made him tick, but none of that mattered.
“Can you not see this is the one choice I’ve been able to make without someone forcing it on me? Finally taking back control of my life from my parents. Besides, Theodus is a prick and I deserve more than that.”
“And you think he’s any better?”
“What did you just say?”
“Come on, Candace, you’re talking about someone whose job it is to punish souls who have sinned. I wouldn’t even like to count the number of shitty things he’s done in his existence.”
She clenched her fists under the table.
Where does he get off saying shit like that? Does he think I’m unaware of what type of man Lucifer is? Does he even know me at all?
“So what, Jax? So fucking what. Do you think that means he doesn’t deserve me?”
“No one will ever deserve you.”
She almost reeled back. She hadn’t listened to Lucifer or her father about Jax having feelings for her, but she saw them clear as day in his expression now. How had she not realised this before?
“And you think you do?” she whispered.
He had the decency to look away, eyes full of regret. Her chest constricted painfully.
All this time. All this fucking time. Why? Why, Jax? This isn’t fair.
She’d never once looked at him as anything other than a brother figure. They’d grown up together. The thought of Jax seeing her as more made her stomach turn.
“What about Sam? Are you just stringing her along?”
“No. I love Sam.”
“Then what the fuck? How long have you felt this way about me?”
He let out a long, heart breaking sigh.
“Since we were kids.”
She didn’t even want to scream and rage at him. She wanted to cry. Betrayal crept into her heart. Her best friend had lied to her face for years. Their entire friendship felt tainted. A wave of nausea rushed through her. She put a hand to her mouth, standing up abruptly.
“Candace?”
She shook her head, backing away and running towards the toilets. The minute she slammed into a cubicle, the tide erupted. She could only be glad she’d braided her hair earlier so it wasn’t hanging in her face.
She sat back against the wall when she’d emptied her stomach, feeling completely drained.
There was nothing she could say to her best friend that would make anything better. How could she even face him again? Knowing he was in love with her. Knowing that he’d spent their lives hoping she’d see him as something other than her best friend.
What did he think would happen if I married Theodus? Is that why he tried to save me?
Everything he’d done for her was suddenly unpalatable. He could’ve had an ulterior motive. Her head started to hurt as all the possibilities ran through it.
I don’t want to think about this anymore.
She tugged her phone out of her pocket and sent a text.
‘Please come get me.’
She didn’t care if he said I told you so, all she wanted was to curl up in his arms and forget this ever happened. She promptly burst into tears, putting her head in her hands.
How could things between her and Jax ever be the same again?
Chapter Twenty Four
The wind ruffled his hair. Sitting up on the roof of Azrael’s building, Lucifer surveyed London with narrowed eyes. He hadn’t wanted to leave Candace alone, but she’d insisted.
That boy better not decide it’s mutual confession time.
Mall would inform him if anything was amiss in Hell, but things had been quiet. Who knew what kind of plotting was going on between his demons. At that moment, it didn’t matter. Provided they didn’t do anything too disruptive or involve him, he was content to let them roam as they pleased.
“Are you here because you wish to speak to me?” said a voice from behind him.
“What makes you think this is about you?”
Azrael sat down next to him, his legs dangling off the side. Lucifer wasn’t in the mood for talking, but he also didn’t want to fight with his brother.
“This is still where I stay when I visit Earth. I’ve been watching you.”
“Then you know what I’m doing here.”
The other angel put his hand out.
“Surveying the world now you’re free?”
“Freedom came at a cost.” My heart. My heart was the biggest cost of them all.
“Doesn’t it always when it comes to our Father?”
Lucifer bit his lip on a retort. Our damn Father. The crux of everything. He looked away, his eyes falling on the buildings in the distance.
“What do you want, Azrael? Shouldn’t you be off telling a bunch of humans their time is up? Or have you come here to gloat?”
He didn’t much care what his brother wanted. He’d prefer it if Heaven’s minions left him in peace.
“Something strange is going on with Father.”
He turned his head towards Azrael sharply.
“What do you mean?”
“He is… restless. I’ve heard Him mutter your name on several occasions. I fear something is amiss.”
“Why are you telling me this?”
It didn’t make any sense. Why would his brother come to him when their father was up to something?
“Contrary to what you might believe, I hold no animosity toward you. Besides, I thought you might want to know so you could keep… her safe.”
So he does know about Candace. I wasn’t sure if he’d admit to it or not after he told me he’s been watching me.
If Azrael really had no ulterior motives, then he should take the warning seriously. What could his father possibly be restless about?
“Since when did you care about my personal life?”
“You have my wife to thank for that.”
“Is that what you’re calling her now?”
A stupid human tradition.
He sincerely hoped Candace wouldn’t force him into engaging in such an idiotic practice. It wasn’t something they’d ever discussed.
Azrael grinned at him.
“No, but I didn’t want you jumping down my throat over my ‘obsession’ with a human.”
“The only immortal human in existence you mean.”
Lucifer didn’t like it. It was all very well having creatures such as vampires technically being immortal unless you staked them, but humans? He’d never done that for anyone before. It wasn’t jealousy he felt, surely?
Fuck, I’m not jealous. That’s ridiculous. She’ll live hundreds of years so I don’t have to worry about that now.
But he did. The thought of not having her was like a knife to his heart. Lifetimes passed in his world within a blink of an eye. Why did he have to feel this way about her? Feelings never sat well with him.
I miss her and she’s only been away from me a couple of hours. I’ve fallen foul of emotions.
Emotions.
Feelings.
Those were human things.
He didn’t like feeling human. He was an angel. And yet, it was Candace. How could he regret falling in love with the girl who soothed away his pain with a simple look?
“Well, it wasn’t as if I asked Him to grant me that. Besides, she’s given up most of her life to live amongst angels.”
And I’m asking Candace to give up hers to live with demons. How fucking ironic that both of us should find ourselves in a similar situation.
This couldn’t be his plan. Did he think his sons needed to be taught how to love? How to care for someone other than themselves? Did it even matter? He was done with God and his plans.
Before he had a chance to answer Azrael, something buzzed in his pocket. He pulled it out.
“Another human contraption,” Azrael muttered under his brea
th.
Candace had given him the phone so she could get in touch with him when she was finished with her friend. There was a single text from her.
‘Please come get me.’
He frowned. Something about it bothered him. She hadn’t asked him to go back to her flat. Get her from where? He typed out a response.
‘Where are you?’
A minute ticked by and there was no reply. He looked back up at his brother.
“Where is she, Azrael?”
“Where’s who?”
“Candace. I know you can track her down.”
Azrael rolled his eyes.
“Still can’t hear their thoughts then?”
“No.”
Except he could hear hers when they kissed each other. He’d never stopped to wonder why that was, only that it worked in his favour. It was how he discovered her true feelings towards him.
“Fine. Don’t know why it’s so important you find her now. She’s not in danger.”
No, but something is wrong.
Azrael went silent for a long moment, his eyes glazing over slightly. It wasn’t the first time Lucifer wished their father hadn’t taken away his ability to hear human’s thoughts. He didn’t have time to track her down via her brand nor did he want to hurt her by doing so. It would burn her again, just as it did when that idiotic prince kissed her.
“She’s in that vampire owned bar,” Azrael said. “The one in Soho.”
Lucifer stood, his wings flaring out.
“Before you disappear off. Just be wary of whatever it is Father is planning.”
“I’m always wary of our Father and His games. You can never let your guard down when it comes to God.”
He didn’t wait for a reply, taking to the skies and flying straight towards Soho. He landed outside the steps of the bar, not bothering to hide his actions nor himself from prying eyes.
Let them see the Devil is in their midst for all I care.
He felt her now. She was close. Taking the steps two by two, he shoved the door open and strode past the coat check. The bar wasn’t busy. He surveyed it for a moment. The bartender looked up, her eyes going wide the next moment.
“Is that…?” the dark haired vampire whispered.