by L. L Hunter
I couldn’t believe it. Was this producer offering me a part? Was I dreaming? I took the card he offered and thanked him. Well, I’m not sure words actually came out of my mouth. I was much too shocked. Bree must have known because she held another glass of champagne in front of my face and told me to drink up. I grabbed the glass and did as she asked, drinking the bubbly liquid so fast the bubbles hit my nose, and I sneezed and hiccuped.
Bree laughed. “Are you okay?”
“I don’t know, Bree. Did that really just happen?”
“Yes. Yes, it did. Welcome to Hollywood, Kate.”
I was pulled out of my stupor by Bree as she dragged me toward the makeup desk. She pushed me into the chair and the makeup artists started putting things on my face, and all I could do was go with it. I was running on autopilot, adrenaline, and champagne fuel now.
This had been one of the best moments of my life. I wish I could call up my grandmother and tell her about it. But I heard her voice in the back of my mind telling me I could do this. I smiled and took another sip of my drink and let myself go with the flow of the evening, enjoying myself without fear.
By the end of the night, I’d taken more photographs with Bree’s phone than I had in my entire life and let myself be snapped more times than I could count. I tried on every shade of lipstick in the new line, and at the end of the event, I was given a gift bag with a few samples inside. It included a gorgeous, candle that smelled amazing, expensive chocolates, an even more costly looking diamond bracelet, and a book about positive body image from one of the social media influencers sponsoring the event. I went home on a high and vowed to call the producer’s office first thing Monday.
I went to bed that night with a positive feeling that everything was looking up for the first time in my life. Well, for the first time after meeting Leo, Bree’s father and moving into this apartment. This was it. I was about to land my very first role in Hollywood.
The next morning, Bree was nowhere to be found. I got up and made myself breakfast and showered, then decided to go for a walk around the block. When I got back to the apartment, Bree was back, and she wasn’t empty-handed.
“What’s all this?” I said, staring at the shopping bags on the kitchen table.
“These are for you.”
“What? Oh, my goodness, Bree. You didn’t have to do that.”
“Yes, I did. You need a few things if you’re going to survive here. The first is a cell phone. I can’t believe you don’t have one.”
I opened the bag from the phone store and pulled out the pretty white box. It was the latest model of a popular smartphone. I was speechless.
“You really didn’t have to do this, Bree. Besides, I have a cellphone.”
“Not a proper one. And yes. I did. You probably wouldn’t have bought this yourself. I’ve added you to my plan, so you don’t have to worry about cost right now. You can pay me back when you land your first role.”
I ran over to her and threw my arms around her. “Thank you. This is far too much.”
“It’s my pleasure. I like you, Kate. And I want you to make it here. Go on and open the other bags.”
I went back to the table with a wide grin on my face and pulled out all the items in the bags. After placing them all on the table, I was well and truly at a loss for words.
“Bree… this is… I can’t begin to thank you.”
“Do you like them?”
“I do.”
Bree had bought me a new bed linen set. It was baby blue and white. It reminded me of the sky at home. It was perfect. She had also brought a hair straightener, an eyeshadow palette in nude and bronze tones, and a gorgeous black dress. It was made with the most luscious fabric I think I’ve ever felt in my life. I picked up the dress and admired it.
“Every woman needs a little black dress. It’s versatile and a must-have.”
“It’s absolutely stunning. This must have cost you a fortune. However can I repay you?”
She flipped her hand and shook her head. “Don’t worry about it. Call it an investment. Besides, I got a massive discount on this dress like the other one. Actor perks!”
A tear rolled down my cheek, and I threw my arms around Bree once more.
“It’s perfect. Thank you so much.”
“You’re welcome, Kate. You can wear your new little black dress to the Teen Choice Awards next weekend.”
My mouth dropped open. “You’re inviting me to a real awards night? But I haven’t got the part yet. I’m not an actress.”
“Kate, relax.” She braced my shoulders and made me look at her. “You can come as my date to see what all the fuss is about. If you land this role, then next time, it could be you that’s nominated.”
My eye’s widened. “You’re nominated?”
“The show I’m in is.”
“Oh, my gosh. Congratulations. I can’t believe I’m going to a real awards ceremony. This is a dream come true.”
Bree patted my arm and winked before walking out of the room. I sat on my bed and thought about my whirlwind couple of days. How was this my life?
6
On Monday morning, as promised, I called the producer’s office that I’d met at the launch event. I explained who I was and how I’d met Harry. And like Harry had said, his secretary set up an appointment for me to come in for a screen test and to meet with Harry and his colleagues the following day. So, that night, over a glass of wine, Bree gave me advice on what to do at the meeting/screen test.
“Screen tests are like an audition, but they usually come after. They don’t usually happen until after a second recall. If you’re being asked to screen test, it’s an excellent sign. It means they like you.”
“Okay… that’s good. What’s a second recall?”
“A call back after the initial audition. It’s good they’ve skipped the audition stage, because those things are hard, man.”
“Oh, my gosh, I don’t think I could do it. I get awful stage fright. One time in elementary school, I was cast as the lead in the school play, and I puked on stage. It went all over the band conductor. It was so embarrassing. I was playing a princess, and just six years old, so after that, I was called ‘Princess Barfy.’ I was so upset.”
Bree laughed. My cheeks heated, so I took a hasty sip of my wine.
“I’ve never told anyone outside of my family that before.”
“It’s okay. I’m sorry. We all have our horror stories.” She took a sip of her wine, finished it and then poured more before setting her glass on the little table. We were outside on the balcony, and it was a nice, warm evening. “I’ll see your Princess Barfy and raise you.”
I took another sip of my drink and waited for what Bree was about to tell me.
“Back in New Jersey, growing up, I used to sing in my church choir. When I was about twelve, we were in the middle of a long rehearsal for a Christmas performance. The rest of the kids were fucking around, so rehearsal was taking a lot longer than normal, so by the time it was my turn for my big solo, I was really busting to pee.”
I snort-laughed, and wine almost went up my nose. I coughed, and put my hand over my mouth.
“Yeah, you can see where this is going, can’t you? Anyway, because I really needed to use the restroom, I was holding on with all my might, so that meant I didn’t have much breath for singing. My choir leader was telling me to breathe, breathe, breathe. But I couldn’t let my breath out because, if I did, I would also let some pee out. So I tried with everything I had to get through the rehearsal of my solo, but toward the end, when I was nearing the big note, I felt everything release.”
I gasped. “No!”
“Yes. My breath released the big note, and my bladder released everything it had been holding. Luckily, nobody noticed until afterward, because my big note was flawless. As I excused myself to run to the bathroom, shoes now soaked and squelching, I could hear the rest of the kids whispering about me. And because the choir area was surrounded by microphones, their wh
ispers were like shouts. I heard everything. They called me a baby and made crying sounds every time they saw me after that.”
“Oh, my gosh. That’s horrible, Bree. Kids can be so mean.”
“I know. It was the most humiliating moment of my life.”
I nodded, not knowing how to offer words of comfort or sympathy. I just took another sip of my drink, and when it was done, I poured some more. After both pouring our hearts and souls out, we finished the bottle and went to bed in a haze.
I hadn’t spoken of that moment in a long time, maybe ever. I didn’t even write it in my diary. It stayed locked away in the darkest parts of my mind, and I had locked it and thrown away the key.
It was probably a good thing that I was opening up, making friends, and sharing my darkness, my most shameful moments with someone. My grandmother had told me not to keep my emotions and bad experiences locked away and bottled up.
If I wanted to become an actress, I would need to channel those emotions and use those experiences in my craft.
Though painful, it was those experiences that made a person.
7
The meeting with Harry was the following morning, and I’d woken up a little under the weather. I staggered over to the coffee machine and turned it on, yawning the whole way. Bree stumbled out of her room not long after.
“Oh, my God. Why is it so bright!”
“I know. Oh, why did I drink so much? I’m not much of a drinker.”
“Well, considering we each shared our deepest, darkest secrets with each other last night, it’s a given that we drank a whole bottle of wine.”
I wiped my hand over my face and scooped up my long curly locks off my neck. The coffee machine finally finished doing its thing, so I got two cups and poured some in each. I handed one to Bree before inhaling my own.
“Thank you. Mm, Coffee.”
We headed out onto the balcony. I walked over to the balcony railing and rested my elbows on the ledge. I looked out over the rooftops of the apartment blocks in front of us, all the way out to the sparkling greenish-blue ocean. The horizon was a bit hazy today, which usually indicated a warm day. Ohio was always cooler, so I loved this summery weather. I basked in the early morning sun like a cat, turning my face up to meet it.
“So it’s your big meeting today. Are you ready?” Bree asked.
“I–I think so.”
“You’ll be fine. You’ll kill it. Just be yourself and breathe.”
“Thanks, Bree.” I smiled and took a long sip of my coffee.
After coffee and a bowl of cereal, I dressed in my denim skirt, which had been washed and dried after my encounter with the rain, and put on a cute top borrowed from Bree’s closet. Then Bree drove me to the studio in downtown L.A. where my meeting with Harry would take place.
We stopped at a boom gate at the entrance to a studio, and Bree waved her security pass. This was the same studio where her TV show was filmed, so she had full access. Thankfully, she was heading to set so she was able to take me.
“Will you be okay? Do you want me to come with you?”
“No, I’ll be fine on my own. Thanks so much for your help. Have a good day at work.”
“No problem. After you’re finished, just come over to sound stage four and name drop me, and they’ll let you in. You can come and watch filming.”
“Oh, that’s sounds amazing. Okay. I’ll see you after.”
After I was pointed in the direction of Harry’s office, I waved goodbye to Bree and walked through the doors. The office was cool inside with the air conditioning running. It was your usual office space with grey carpet, potted plants, white desks, and film and TV posters aligning the walls. I walked over to the reception desk.
“Hi, I’m Kate Brooks. I’m here to see Harry Redding.”
“Take a seat, and I’ll let Mr Redding know you’ve arrived.”
“Thanks.” I glanced around the small foyer and took a seat on a plastic chair in the corner next to a water cooler. I was tempted to pour myself a drink, but I was afraid of needing to go to the bathroom because of nerves. My stomach churned, and I placed my hand over it.
Please don’t puke. Please don’t puke, I said in my head over and over.
Thankfully, it wasn’t long before a door down the hall opened, and Harry walked out followed by another guy—a really good-looking guy. Our eyes met immediately, and I could feel myself getting hot, so I diverted my eyes and looked at Harry.
“Kate, it’s nice to see you again. Thanks for coming. This is my assistant and co-writer, Damian. Damian, this is Kate Brooks, the actress I was telling you about.”
Damian stepped forward and held out his hand. “It’s good to meet you, Kate.”
“You too.” I shook his hand, and I don’t know if I imagined it, but I swear our hands stayed connected for a few extra seconds after the shake. Our eyes met again, and then he winked at me. I blushed hard and had to look away.
“Follow us, Kate.”
“Okay.” I let Harry lead the way, but Damian stopped and gestured for me to go before him.
“Thank you,” I said meekly and followed Harry down the hall to his office, all the while thinking about how Damian’s eyes may or may not have been on my ass.
Harry’s office was rather small. I sat on one of two chairs placed in front of the desk at the back of the room while Harry and Damian made their way around the desk and sat behind it.
“So, first of all, Kate, I don’t want you to be nervous. This is more of an informal chat than an audition or a meeting.”
I took a deep breath in and let it out. “Thank goodness. I don’t tend to do well in meetings, and I’ve been known to have a little stage fright.”
Damian shrugged. “It happens.” I looked at Damian and found he was staring at me. In fact, he hadn’t taken his eyes off me since we met. Oh, boy. How was I going to last the entire meeting with him looking at me like that?
“It’s fine. Like I said at the launch event, I have a part I think you’re perfect for, or we do. Damian and I have been working on a film project for a while now, and we’re just about ready for casting. As soon as I saw you, I knew you’d be perfect for our female protagonist.”
“You want to give me the lead role?”
“Yes. Is that okay?”
“Of course. But you know I haven’t done anything other than plays at school and a few talent contests in my hometown.”
“That’s okay. The part is yours, so you don’t need to audition. You’ll just need to do a screen test and read some sides for us. Is that okay?”
I nodded and tried to sit up and act confident, even though I was dying inside. It was quite unnerving having two people staring at me, let alone an extremely hot guy who was practically undressing me with his eyes.
“So, Kate, here’s a script. When you’re ready, can you read the part of Molly in the first scene?” Harry explains, handing me a script. I pan over it with my eyes and notice some of it is highlighted. I find Molly’s part and quickly read over it.
After a few minutes of silence, Harry interrupts. “So, Kate, just read it out when you’re ready.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. You want me to read this out loud?” How embarrassing. They probably thought I was a complete ditz. I was certain they had already explained what they wanted me to do.
“Yes, please. And Damian will read the part of Scott.”
“Oh, okay.” I squirmed in my seat. Damian was going to read the part of my character’s love interest. What if I messed up the scene? I quickly looked at Damian, but he was looking at his script, and not at me. I took a deep breath and began to read.
8
After reading through the scene a couple of times with Damian, and with Harry giving me advice in certain areas, it was now time for me to do a screen test, where I basically stood on a mark on the floor in front of a camera. They had a light screen and lights set up next to the spot because the room we were in was reasonably dim.
“Kate, can you p
lease stand on the mark for me. I want to see how you look on camera.”
“Yes. Of course.” I tucked my hair behind one ear and walked over to the taped mark on the carpet. I positioned my feet just on the tape and looked straight at the camera pointed toward me.
“Now, I know you don’t have much experience being on camera, Kate,” said Harry, coming to stand on the other side of the camera and in front of me, “but the trick is not to look directly at the camera itself, but rather, pretend I have something on my shoulder. Imagine a faery on my shoulder.”
I nodded and tried to take in all his advice, but gosh, there was a lot to think about.
And then Harry walked away, and Damian came to take his place before me.
Oh, boy.
The way he looked at me, it made me feel like I was the only woman on the planet. It was just us in this orbit. I was the sun, and he was the moon, and we were doing this dance around each other. My heart pounded strong beneath my rib cage as I looked into his eyes.
For a moment, I forgot where I was. I was standing in space and time, in the expanse of nothingness, with just Damian and me, nothing and no one else.
Until Harry’s voice broke the spell we both seemed to be under.
“That’s it! That’s perfect, Kate! I knew the camera would love you.”
I smiled and pulled my gaze away from Damian’s, but it was near impossible. Because I was a piece of metal and he was a magnet. I couldn’t escape.
“Thank you, Kate. We’ll be in touch. Just leave your number with my secretary out front. We’ll call you later about coming in to meet and do another screen test with our male lead.”
“Okay. Thank you.” I left my mark, but my eyes never left Damian’s, and then as I walked out of the room and down the hall toward the front desk, I heard footsteps behind me.