by K. C. Crowne
The more I thought about it, the more I realized just how little I knew my own son. I spent so much time away, working myself to the bone to provide him everything he’d need for a comfortable life. It was the same song and dance with Melissa, and I wound up driving her into the arms of another man.
Maybe Wally could make it. Maybe he’d become a world-class chef and open his own restaurant, even end up on one of those reality TV cooking shows or whatever. He could be the next Gordon Ramsay, though without the British accent and significant anger issues. The chances of Wally reaching those heights seemed slim, but at least…
At least he’d be happy.
It was a bitter pill to swallow, but Melissa had a point. I’d rather Wally try to follow his passion than hate me. If on the off-chance things didn’t work out, he could always give the medical career track another attempt. It wouldn’t be the end of the world. I could see now that I was out of line.
I tried calling Wally, but he didn’t pick up. I then proceeded to send him a few texts. Those were a lot harder to ignore since they tended to pop up on the lock screen.
Wally, come home so we can discuss things.
I’ve given culinary school some thought.
We can talk things through when you get here.
A few minutes went by, but I received no response. He was ignoring me.
How was I supposed to apologize if he refused to speak with me?
“Dammit,” I grumbled under my breath. If he wasn’t going to pick up the phone for me, who would he pick up the phone for?
I bet he’d answer if Vivian called him. It was worth a shot.
I ventured down the hall toward the guest room, hand hovering over the door to knock. I wasn’t sure what I was going to say. Things between Vivian and I were…uncertain. I tried keeping my distance. I wanted to be respectful of her space. The realization that I felt more for her than I cared to admit had been a frightening one. I wasn’t ready to take things further, maybe ever. So I thought pulling back was the best option for us both. Save us the heartbreak.
The softest sound reached my ears from the other side.
Sniffling, then outright sobbing.
My throat closed and my heart thudded.
“Vivian?” I called to her, attempting to open the door. It was locked. “What’s going on?”
“Don’t come in,” she snapped.
“I thought I heard you—”
“I said don’t come in! Just leave me alone.”
She sounded so distressingly small and upset that it made my stomach clench. “Do you need anything?”
“Go away, Jesse.”
“You know I can’t do that, Vivian. I need to make sure you’re alright.”
“I’m fine.”
“You don’t sound fine.” I rattled the doorknob again. “Open the door, Vivian. I’m not playing around. I need visual confirmation that you’re—”
The door swung open so fast that the surrounding air rushed past me. Vivian stood before me, looking everywhere except in my eyes. Probably to hide the fact that she’d been crying even though it was written all over her face. The puffiness of her cheeks and the redness of her nose, the small beads of moisture caught in her eyelashes.
“There,” she snapped. “Happy?”
I tried to reach out, but she took a step back. “What happened?”
“Nothing.”
“Doesn’t look like nothing.”
“What do you care? You’ve been ignoring me for weeks.”
A pang of guilt bloomed in my chest. “I haven’t been ignoring you.”
“Bullshit.”
“I haven’t,” I insisted. “You’re all I can fucking think about.”
“Then why…” She shook her head. “I don’t understand. You’ve been avoiding me. Don’t you dare deny it.”
“I have been.”
“Why?”
“Because you scare me. In more ways than one.”
Vivian’s nose curled. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
“I’m scared of losing you,” I blurted out. “I’m scared of something happening to you. I’m scared of what I feel for you—”
“What you feel for me?” she echoed, so soft and confused and hopeful that it was suddenly hard for me to breathe. “What do you feel for me, Jesse?”
“I don’t know,” I admitted. “A lot of things. And what scares me is that I don’t know where this is going or if it’s going to go anywhere at all. I don’t want to make promises I can’t keep. And I’m scared you don’t feel the same way. I’m scared this isn’t going to work. I’m scared of hurting you. That’s why I’m keeping my distance. Because being with you… it’s too good to be true. And good things don’t happen to me, alright? The last time I allowed myself to feel what I feel…”
Vivian stroked my cheek, cool fingers grazing my chin. “I understand,” she said. “I’m scared, too. But please, don’t shut me out. That’s all I ask. I’ve missed you so much. There’s so much going on right now, and the only time I feel even remotely okay is when I’m with you. So please…” Vivian pressed against me, not an inch of space between us.
I caved like a house of cards.
I kissed her like it was the only thing I knew how to do. Her fingers combed through my hair as I circled her waist with my arms, pulling her against me. The sound of her soft moan was enough to make my heart seize. I didn’t want anything but this. I wanted to be selfish, even for just a little bit. Nothing else in the world mattered except the taste of her lips and the warmth of her skin.
There would be time to talk later.
For now, this was all we needed.
Chapter 25
Vivian
It wasn’t —by any means— some undying declaration of love, nor did it need to be. I understood Jesse from the depths of my core because his fears, his hopes, his hesitations were the same as mine. At this point, I’d give anything for the quiet comfort of his embrace and breathtaking kisses.
I guided him to my bed. I threaded my fingers between his and pulled him with me, sitting him down on the edge of the mattress before crawling into his lap. I straddled him and went straight back to kissing him, lips locked together in a perfect fit.
And he was gentle. So gentle and sweet in the way he stroked my back and cupped my cheek and sucked on my bottom lip. His large hands roamed freely, curious in their exploration, but not once was he rough with me. He handled me with care, like some precious work of art or fine crystal. It pleased me to no end that this strong, powerful man was nothing but tender when it came to me.
This man who’d saved me on more than one occasion. This man who’d put himself in harm’s way for my sake. This man who was terse with others yet infinitely patient with me.
When he spoke, he spoke softly, a low murmur in my ear. Words an intimate rumble in my chest. When he looked at me, it was with nothing but adoration. Veneration. Borderline worship. His gaze had weight that lingered and traced over my form as I slowly undressed, peeling away clothes and discarding them to the floor.
He murmured sweet nothings against my skin, working his way down my neck to my collar bone to my chest. His warm breath tickled my skin, leaving goosebumps trailing behind him in his wake. And even when he held me close, it still didn’t feel close enough.
I slipped my hands beneath his shirt and lifted it off and over his head, pressing against his chest to get him to lie down. He smiled up at me, almost in awe. He played with my hair, twirling my locks about his forefinger with an almost boyish bashfulness.
“You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on.”
“Flattery will get you everywhere.”
“I mean it, angel.”
I leaned down and kissed his chest, working my way down to lick his abs. I slipped off his lap and knelt before him, pressing my lips to the bulge in the front of his pants. I hooked my fingers over his waistband and pulled them down, licking my lips as his cock sprang free. Jesse propped hi
mself up on his elbows to watch as I teased his head with the tip of my tongue.
“You really don’t have to,” he said.
“I want to,” I assured. “All those times you drove me crazy and made me beg… It’s time you got a taste of your own medicine.”
His pupils were dark and wide. “My angel’s turning out to be quite the devil.”
He grunted as I took him into my mouth. I hollowed my cheeks and sucked him down in earnest. No sooner did I start to swirl my tongue around to tease him relentlessly did I find his fingers in my hair, guiding me down the length of his shaft. I took him as deep as my throat would allow, but there was just too much of him to swallow. I stroked the remainder of his cock with my free hand, working in tandem with my mouth.
“That’s my girl,” he cooed. “So fucking beautiful.”
I bobbed my head up and down, savoring the heat of his length on my tongue. It was fun watching him unravel, slowly but surely, with every pass.
“Slow down,” he warned, grasping my chin to pull me off. “It’s your turn.”
“I wasn’t finished with you yet.”
He helped me onto my feet, circling my waist with one arm. I stumbled into him with a light laugh.
“Lie down,” he said. “I need to go get a condom.”
“How do you want me?”
He leaned in close and whispered in my ear. “Surprise me.” The cheeky wink he gave after was the icing on the cake.
Jesse left briefly, but I wasn’t worried. I knew without a shadow of a doubt that he’d hurry back. A burning excitement filled me from head to toe, the anticipation enough to make me vibrate out of my skin. When he returned, he couldn’t help but smirk.
“Why are you still standing? Couldn’t figure it out?”
I tilted my chin up defiantly. “Didn’t you say something about wanting to fuck me up against a wall?”
He licked his lips. “Did I say that?”
“Don’t tell me it was an empty promise.”
Jesse walked into my space, confident in his advance. Every step he took forward, I mirrored and took one step back. We continued like this, eyes locked, until my back was pressed against the nearest wall.
“Is this really what you want?” he murmured against my cheek. He breathed me in slowly, strong hands sliding down my sides to settle on my hips. “Do you think you’ll be able to hold on?”
I circled his neck with my arms and kissed him deeply, tongue sweeping over his bottom lip. “I trust you.”
Without another word, he grabbed me by the thighs and hooked my legs around his waist, pressing into me slowly. He sheathed his cock within my walls, sliding in easily thanks to the hot arousal pooling between my legs. The angle set off a chain reaction, igniting sparks that arced from nerve to nerve, speeding all the way up my spine and into my skull where my thoughts swirled into one big explosion of color.
“Jesse,” I gasped his name into his mouth. “Oh, yes.”
“Feel good, angel?” he asked with a grunt, thrusting his hips against. The head of his cock swept past my sweet spot, making my core burn hotter and brighter with every pass.
“Yes, yes, yes. Right there, Jesse.”
“Love the sounds you make. So greedy for me.”
I dug my fingers into his muscular shoulders in search of stability. “Please, don’t stop. Fuck, you make me feel so good.”
“You’re getting so nice and tight around me. You must be pretty close.”
“I am. I really am. Oh—”
My walls fluttered around his hard cock as an orgasm rippled through me, a familiar warmth spreading through my body. Exhaustion took hold, sinking into my marrow. It was a good thing Jesse was strong enough for both of us, because I doubted I’d be able to hold on for much longer now that my bones were jelly.
I sighed, sated.
He kissed the corner of my mouth. “I’m not done playing with you, baby.”
Baby.
It was the first time he’d called me anything other than an angel. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t love it. It was sweet. It was sexy. It was just between us. He made me feel so safe and special that I was fairly certain I’d let him call me whatever he wanted and be fine with it.
Jesse carried me over to the bed and set me down. It was a wonderful feeling, being totally covered by his body. His kisses were gentler now. Sweeter. Like we had all the time in the world.
“Missed you,” he murmured against my cheek as he pressed back into me. His rhythm was a lot slower than before. Tender. Like he was telling me with his whole body just how much he cared. If he couldn’t quite put it to words, at least he could show me.
I ran my fingers through his hair, stroking the pad of my thumb across his cheek. “Missed you, too.”
When he pressed his forehead to mine, I closed my eyes, suddenly realizing just how in sync we were. Our breathing. The movement of our bodies. The soft caresses of exploratory touch. We moved as one unit, so in tune and on the same frequency that everything else in the world faded. It was just us, complete and full and so beautifully and wonderfully together.
I’d had a boyfriend or two in the past who tried to make love to me, as it were. But they were nothing compared to this. Nothing compared to Jesse. When I was with him, every question I had about the world suddenly had an answer. There was no right or wrong, just him and the safety of his arms. I felt nothing but an absolute oneness, a satisfying calm that I knew I’d never find anywhere else.
He was my one.
As easy as it would have been to spiral and worry about the future and what this all meant, I pushed the thoughts from my mind and focused solely on him. His smell, his taste, the way he always seemed to know where to touch me to drive me wild.
Jesse slipped a hand between us and rubbed his thumb over my clit, immediately sending me over the edge. I swallowed my scream of pleasure with a bruising kiss, one that left me dizzy and seeing stars.
“So nice and tight, baby,” he groaned. “You’re going to make me come.”
“Come for me,” I begged, voice barely a whisper. “I want to make you feel good. What do you need me to do?”
“Fuck, no, you’re perfect. Just— Can I go a bit harder?”
“Yes,” I breathed. “Please, Jesse, I want to feel you come.”
Now that he had my permission, Jesse’s pace quickened. His thrusts came faster, harder, the snap of his hips against mine ringing in my ear. He plunged into me, stretching me to my fullest. The drag of his cock inside me was punctuated with the wet slap of skin on skin and heavy panting. The mattress beneath us creaked in protest, but we didn’t care. He was too far gone, chasing the inevitable high.
He came with a shout, gasping into my hair as a shiver passed through him.
I drew mindless circles into his back with the tip of my finger, hooking my ankles together to lock him against me. I didn’t want him to go. I wanted to hold onto him forever. This strong, brave, powerful man was mine to protect, mine to keep. I wouldn’t have minded if the rest of the world melted away if it meant I could spend the rest of my life like this.
The world, unfortunately, didn’t work that way.
The sound of the elevator doors in the main living room reached my ears, followed by the shuffling of feet. Jesse and I looked at each other, alarmed. Someone was here, and they had literally caught us with our pants down.
“Dad?” Wally called from the entrance. “I’m here. You said you wanted to talk.”
“Shit,” Jesse hissed.
We immediately sprang into action, clumsily gathering our clothes and putting them on as quickly as we could. Wally appeared at the doorway, which Jesse and I mistakenly left open because we thought no one else would be making an appearance.
Wally looked to his father, then at me, then to the messy bed and tangled sheets.
“What—” He gawked at me, staring at my neck. “Is that a hickey?”
I clasped a hand over the spot in question. “N-no. Of course not.”<
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“What are you doing in Viv’s room?” Wally asked his father. “Why are you so out of breath?” Why—” Confusion twisted at his expression, followed by realization and rage. “Holy shit.”
Jesse put his hands up, as if taming a rabid animal. “Just let me explain, son—”
“Have you been fucking my ex-girlfriend?”
Chapter 26
Jesse
There was no escaping his fury. Wally’s cheeks were red, the vein in his temple threatening to burst out of his skull. Fists clenched, jaw tight, nostrils flared. My son was normally a well-tempered young man, but right now, he was understandably anything but.
“How could you do this?” he hissed.
“Wally, just calm down.”
“Calm down? Don’t you dare tell me to calm down! This is so messed up, I don’t even know where to begin.” Wally gestured in Vivian’s general direction, unable to look her in the eye. “She’s half your fucking age, Dad! What the hell are you thinking?”
I swallowed but found no reprieve for my dry throat. Our age difference had definitely crossed my mind on several occasions. It made me feel weird at first, but it quickly became obvious that Vivian was so much more than her age.
“We’re both consenting adults,” I argued. “It’s what we both wanted.”
“What about the fact that she’s my ex-girlfriend? That she’s my friend. Did it ever occur to you how uncomfortable that would make me feel? How… How sick that is?”
Vivian took a step forward, her brow knitted into a frown. “Wally, we never meant to hurt you. It just sort of happened.”
“Just sort of happened,” he echoed in disbelief. “What the hell, Viv? Did you not respect me enough to at least talk to me first?”
“How was I supposed to bring something like that up?”
Wally shook his head. “How long has this been going on? How long have you two been doing shit behind my back?”
I glanced at Vivian. I had a feeling that any answer I gave would still piss my son off to no end. Our silence must have been answer enough because Wally threw his hands into the air and huffed.