7
“I can’t apologize enough!”
The next morning. After everyone learned about the fuss in the castle, we went back to our inn. And then we returned to the castle when it was light again.
“Um, Prince Levy. We know you weren’t involved, so please don’t…”
The young prince had thrown himself to the ground despite the fact that we were in front of all his retainers, and now Iris was trying to cheer him up. The fact that the prime minister had been a doppelgänger had already spread beyond the castle and was the talk of everyone in town. As for Iris, she wasn’t just the Dragonslayer but now also the savior of a country that had nearly been taken over by a shape-shifter.
Any and every citizen of Elroad was aware that this savior was betrothed to their prince, and it had the entire town in a state of celebration.
“I’m sorry! It was all because of my own foolishness. Argh, no wonder they call me the idiot prince! If you hadn’t come here, Princess Iris, Elroad would have been subjugated by the Demon King…!”
The prince had been like this for a while now. The news about Lugkraft’s identity had been shocking in proportion to how important he had been in this country. Everyone who had previously dismissed Iris as a countrified runt now practically worshipped her, to the point that you almost couldn’t be sure who really ran this country anymore.
Now Iris stepped to the center of the audience chamber, smiling at the prostrate prince.
“Your Majesty. Royalty shouldn’t be too eager to bow the head, you understand?”
At that, the prince jumped to his feet and coughed loudly. “Y-yes, of course. But we have, I must say, incurred a great debt in this instance. Our nation won’t forget what we owe to Belzerg. Ask us for anything you need in future. Ahem…” He hesitated for a second, then went on. “Because Belzerg and Elroad are friends and allies, of course.” Then he looked away, embarrassed.
Advisers and Iris alike turned beatific gazes on him, and the whole audience chamber was filled with a sense of harmonious accord.
Darkness, squinting at Iris as if she were too bright to look at, stepped up beside the princess. “Good, now we can consider this matter resolved. All loose ends have been tied up, our friendship has deepened, and the ultimate outcome was positive. We ask for your continued goodwill in the future, Prince Levy.”
“Indeed. We can only support you from back here, but that we will do to our fullest ability. What a truly fortuitous outcome. I owe a great deal to Princess Iris’s elder brother, as well. I can’t approve of his tricking me, but that was a valuable lesson in itself.” He seemed to be in such high spirits that it felt like our first meeting had been with a different person. “To he who will one day be my own elder brother, I extend a permanent standing invitation to come here anytime and use this castle like his own house.”
I didn’t really follow. But since nobody seemed like they were going to say anything, I decided to take it on myself to give the prince a word of warning.
“What makes you think I’m going to be your older brother? You must be wrong in the head to get an idea like that.”
It was like time in the audience chamber stood still.
“………Er? I’m sorry, but you are Princess Iris’s elder brother, aren’t you?”
“Sure am. I mean, informally speaking. We don’t have a blood connection.”
The prince cocked his head. Was it that hard to understand what I’d said?
“No blood connection? What… What are you talking about? Are you not Prince Jatice? But then…who in the world are you?”
“I’m maybe the number one adventurer in all of Belzerg: Kazuma Satou.”
Even then, the prince didn’t quite seem to be putting the pieces together. “…I see. It’s complicated; is that what you’re saying? Well, even so, considering Princess Iris reveres you as an older brother, I suppose I, too—”
Maybe he really was an idiot.
“Hold on there. You dissolved your engagement to Iris, remember?”
Now time really stopped.
“Hey, hey, you notice he’s not moving a muscle? I wonder if he’s okay.”
“Ahem, I believe we should leave him be. Kazuma, there are certain things you ought not to say. Why would you go out of your way to tell him what everyone else has danced around?”
As Aqua and Megumin whispered to me, the light returned to the prince’s eyes.
“A-ahhh, about that… I didn’t really mean it! I was just trying to drive a wedge between Belzerg and us so Princess Iris wouldn’t want me…! The prime minister had me fooled, too, and it was the ultimate sign of our alliance and friendship…!!”
Now he was downright desperate, the exact opposite of the way he’d been during our first meeting. The prince turned beseeching eyes on Iris. She looked at me, troubled, for only a second.
“…Belzerg and Elroad shall be friends forever and ever. So let us just be friends as well.”
“Wait, whaaaaaaat?!”
Epilogue
We watched the capital of Elroad grow smaller in the distance.
“Hey, has it occurred to you that we didn’t actually get to enjoy any sightseeing?” Aqua asked from the rearmost seat of the lizard-drawn carriage.
“What, you worry about that now? You, the one who has the absolute highest probability of causing a scene anywhere we go?”
“Now just a minute, you night-stalking NEET. If I’d had a little more allowance, I could have had more fun! When we get back to Axel, I want you to raise my allowance! I’ll cover one of your turns cooking dinner in exchange…”
Grrr…!
“What did you just say?! ‘Night-stalking NEET’?! As if I was even interested in you! Think of all those nights we spent together in the stable! Did I ever do anything to you?!”
“I heard all the fap-fapping from your side of the stable! You were sleeping right next to a gorgeous woman, yeah? Don’t try to tell me I wasn’t the subject of your little fantasies, you lying NEET!”
What a biiiiiiiitch!
For the first time in a while, my anger reached the boiling point. Despite the fact that the carriage was going full tilt, I worked my way from the driver’s bench to where Aqua was seated in the back, bent on reducing her to tears. She must have sensed the danger, because she held up her hands in surrender, but it was too late. Just when I was about to really let her have it, though—
“Ahhh-ha-ha-ha-ha!” Iris, seated next to Megumin, burst into very strange laughter. “Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha ha! Ahhh-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!”
Completely disarmed by my little princess, I gave up on punishing Aqua and sat down beside her instead. “If you want me to forgive you, you’ll do the cooking all this week, right?”
“Sure, but get ready for natto three times a day.”
Iris, looking happily at Aqua (who clearly didn’t feel the least bit bad), said, “I was right. Every day is wonderful when I’m with you, Elder Brother. I can’t thank you enough for taking this quest.” She smiled an innocent smile.
“Aw, don’t mention it. I had a great time, too. What really shocked me is that you were the only one to see through that fake me. And you haven’t even known me as long as anyone else here. What’s wrong with the rest of you? How long have we known one another?”
An objection came from the front of the carriage. “Hold it, Kazuma, I saw through him, too! He had me going for a little while there, but then I realized it couldn’t be you!”
“You’re even worse! The stuff you made him do when he wasn’t even me! All he had to do was give you the tiniest push!”
Megumin and Aqua both looked pointedly away.
“As I told Prince Levy, if there’s one thing I’m confident in, it’s my ability to read people,” Iris said, smiling with assurance.
“Hey, Iris, I see your eyes cloud over when you call Kazuma ‘Elder Brother’…”
“Sure! You claim to see with unclouded eyes, Aqua, but you couldn’t tell me from a monster in disguise.
You still think you deserve that nickname? Huh?” While Aqua was busy covering her ears and pretending she couldn’t hear me, I remembered something that had slipped my mind all this time. “Oh yeah, Iris, you were so busy with work, you never got to hit the town. It’s not much, but I brought you a little souvenir.”
It was the kiddie ring I’d bought in town. It cost only four hundred eris, and unfortunately, I’d forgotten to look for anything more expensive. I was a little afraid Iris wouldn’t want such a cheap toy, but her eyes opened wide.
“Really? I can have this?”
“Sure. You’re missing that ring you always used to wear, right? I can tell—that spot on your finger is kind of white. I thought you might like this one instead.”
She took the cheap souvenir, cradling it tenderly with both hands.
“Kazuma, Kazuma, do you have anything like that for me? I think I’m just about the right age to, you know, receive a certain type of ring.”
When Megumin predictably butted in, I pulled out the item I had prepared for this very occasion. “Here, Megumin, I’ve got Elroad rice crackers for you. I don’t mind saying they cost more than Iris’s ring.”
“……………”
Megumin sat with the bag of rice crackers in her hands, a complicated series of emotions playing over her face. I ignored her.
“Oh, Kazumaaaa, what about me? Did you get a souvenir for me?”
“For you, I’ve got a rock from that gold mine we chased the dragon out of. It’s kind of shiny, like maybe it’s got some gold in it.” I handed her the stone, which might or might not have had any gold in it, and Aqua took it without complaining. She examined it intently. Maybe she liked the shape.
I noticed Darkness shooting furtive glances our way from the driver’s bench, but she was driving; I would worry about her later.
Come to think of it, unlike Iris, the girls had all been with me when I went into town. Why was I giving them souvenirs?
But just as I was thinking that…
“Hee… Hee-hee-hee-hee-hee!” Iris, gazing at the ring like it was a genuine treasure, started laughing. “Elder Brother! Er, I mean… Ahem, that is…”
She couldn’t quite get the words out. Finally, she braced herself and took a deep breath.
“Thank you, Big Bro.”
And then she smiled from ear to ear.
Afterword
Hello from your thankful-that-you-bought-Volume-10, yet-having-been-living-in-Saitama-for-more-than-a-year-has-still-visited-only-the-local-
convenience-stores-and-department-store, pretty-much-living-a-hikikomori-
life author, Natsume Akatsuki. I’m finally living just thirty minutes from Akihabara, but I feel like I hardly go enjoy the city at all.
I’m not especially busy or anything; I’ve got plenty of time to play games at home. Yet somehow, I feel more like a hermit now than I did when I was living in the mountains.
Knowing what exactly is happening with your author is highly irrelevant, so let’s move on to some other present-tense news.
Sneaker Bunko’s official website, Sneaker WEB, is currently serializing An Explosion on This Wonderful World!
This project sprang from a popularity contest held in conjunction with the premiere of the anime; I was going to do a story about the most popular character(s). It was supposed to be a bonus story of only a few pages, but we got so many votes in the contest that we thought a mere short story would bring down the wrath of our readers, and we promptly changed over to a web serial. The result is a second spin-off featuring Megumin, the winner of the contest, so if you’re a fan of things that go boom, check it out.
There’s also a whole bunch of manga going on: Monthly Dragon Age is serializing the main series and the anthology collections; Monthly Comic Alive is running the adaptation of Explosion!, and on the web, Comic Clear is doing a series of four-panel gag strips. Perhaps you’d like to take a look?
We finally got another little-sister episode this time around, but in the next volume, the problem children will be front and center again. Enjoy!
In this volume, as always, I have to think my illustrator Kurone Mishima-sensei, my editor S-san, the designer, proofreader, marketing people, and everyone else whose help was invaluable in getting this book to print. My heartfelt thanks go out to anyone and everyone who was involved in the production of this volume.
And above all, my deepest thanks to all my readers!
Natsume Akatsuki
Thank you for buying this ebook, published by Yen On.
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Gamble Scramble! Page 16