by Mark Tufo
“It’s just temporary. I’ll get your other clothes properly cleaned.”
“Thank you, Cedar. How are you doing by the way? I’ve been so wrapped up in my own drama I’ve forgotten to ask about you. You’re going through the same horror as I am.”
She thought for a moment. “I’m alright, Winter. Of course I’m going to avoid a love triangle at all costs. I’ve read about them; they very rarely work out for the best.”
“Like I needed your books to tell me about that.”
“The War part is hard; I’m thankful for all that time we had with Brody. I wish he was still with us–I don’t think I would have made it this far without him. He taught me how to keep separate the killing aspect so that it doesn’t poison the rest of who I am. For that alone I owe him everything. And then there’s Serrot.”
I’d almost missed that last part, she threw it in so fast at the end. “What about him?” I asked suspiciously.
“He asked me to go for a walk with him after dinner.” She half twirled as she told me. “He’s so dark and brooding, it’s just the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.”
“Dark and brooding is cute to you?”
“It is. Get some sleep. I’ll find the clothes cleaner and have them back to you before we eat.”
I DIDN’T EVEN think I’d had enough time to get straw in my hair when Cedar shook me awake.
“Almost as good as new.” She dropped them on my head.
“Is there any chance you could stop hitting me with clothing?” I asked as I sat up. “How long have you been gone?”
“Three, four hours maybe.”
“I’ve been sleeping that long?”
“Come on, get dressed or I’m going to be late.”
“Oh, that’s right, your big date with Serrot.” I took an exaggerated amount of time pulling my over-sized clothing off.
“Oh, hi Haden,” Cedar said as she looked down the hallway.
I put on my clothes in record time. “Where is he?” I asked, tying my bootlaces.
“Oh…I thought I saw him.”
“Not funny, Cedar.”
“It got you dressed.”
“I’ll remember that.”
“Then I hope you remember that one of the warriors got a moose and if you’re late you might not get any. Or are you switching to Kinder’s roots and vegetables meals?”
“Let’s go.” I was hopping as I rolled my pants down over my boots.
The main cavern was full of people, and the smell–that oh-so-satisfying smell of meat roasting over an open fire–it made my mouth water as I walked into the hustle and bustle. What had only a moment earlier been a cacophony of noise became almost silent enough that I thought I could hear the sizzle of fat rendering on the flame.
“Whoa, why is everyone looking at us?”
“You, Winter. They’re looking at you. Stories of the battle with the Bruton death squad have spread like wildfire throughout the ranks. Nobody from our group should have survived. That we lost so few and destroyed them all down to the last man has everyone in awe. Those squads are specially trained and have even beaten Hillians who were double their number. Apparently, we’re all ghosts.” Cedar elbowed my side.
So few losses? I thought. How many is ever acceptable?
“Cedar, Winter, come!” Haden bellowed from across the room. Men stood aside as we neared them. I heard the word “Ghost” whispered more than once as we passed. I actually saw Serrot smile for the first time since I’d met him as he looked at Cedar. I could see some attractive qualities in his strong features. She looked like she was going to burst at the seams, but somehow she managed a demure smile in return, instead of breaking out into an explosive giggle, which was much more in her nature.
Haden had us sit at his table, along with Serrot and a few more that were in command of his forces. Kinder had left shortly after arriving to oversee the relocating of his people. Haden bid us wait until all of his men had their food before he had our table served. I couldn’t help it; I watched with envy and desire as meal after meal walked past.
“You have the manners of a goat,” Cedar chided me.
“Oh? When did you become an expert on etiquette? I watched you once shove your face into a whole loaf of bread.”
Dinner was incredible. At no time since I’d been in The War had I had to use more restraint than while I ate that meal. The utensils were an irritatingly slow way to shovel food into my mouth. The gnawing in my stomach had been so intense I did not think I would sate it in one sitting. It was with pleasure I sat back and, like earlier, rubbed my belly. This time it wasn’t quite as flat.
“Sir, do you need me for anything?” Serrot asked, standing before Haden had a chance to answer.
“Sir?” Haden asked.
“I’ve got to, umm...go too,” Cedar said, knocking her seat over.
“Oh. No...but later I’d like to go over some plans with you and Winter. For now, enjoy.” He smiled.
Serrot nearly dragged Cedar out of the cavern.
“Will they be alright?” I asked as I watched them leave.
“I’m more concerned about Serrot’s safety than Cedar’s.” He smiled. “Don’t worry; Serrot might be a dour-faced, hot-headed individual who speaks his mind too freely, but he is nothing if not loyal and caring.”
“Good, because I will kill him if he is anything but.”
Haden looked at me. “I know that for the truth.”
The mood was noticeably light-hearted for men in the midst of a war. Some came to pay their respects, others walked close by just to get a glimpse of the Ghost. Haden had to chase more than a few off who wanted to see if they could touch something ethereal. Even the people I’d grown up around my entire life were getting in on the action, like they were seeing me for the first time. Only once did I see Tallow off in the far corner. Serrot’s most severe look had nothing on the ones Tallow was directing my way. Were they for Haden or myself? I might have gone to talk to him, but the press of Klondikes around me made that impossible. And to be perfectly honest I didn’t feel like being dragged down into his production. I was having some fun; it was good to laugh after so much death and so many hardships. It felt like years since I had just relaxed without the threat of someone hurting me in one way or another. Haden’s jovial countenance flipped to comically dire each time someone approached us. Like lifting a mask, his expression would instantly shift back as they left and this became progressively more exaggerated and entertaining to us both until we were laughing out loud. At one point I looked up to see if Tallow had noticed our antics and I realized he had left at some point. Though it saddened me for a moment, I was glad to be released from his searing gaze.
As the night wore on, more and more of the men retired, some just falling asleep where they had eaten. Resting space was at a premium. Haden and the other leaders had an area all to themselves, some of the men had staked out other prime locations but for the most part, you slept wherever you found yourself at the end of the night.
“The men love you, Winter,” Haden said as he escorted me back to the cove I’d rested in earlier that day. I wasn’t quite ready to sleep, but I’d also had my fill of festivity. Maybe I could give one of Cedar’s books a go. “I sent everyone else packing.” He smiled when he led me in. The room was bare save one. Cedar was back and seemed to be sleeping restfully.
“That wasn’t necessary.”
“Perhaps not, but I did it anyway.”
“Thank you, Haden. Thank you for bringing my people in and treating them so kindly.”
“It is I who must thank you, Winter.” There was a silence between us and then he leaned in. I met him halfway. I gave myself over to the moment without a thought for Tallow or The War, my mother, or any of the earthbound problems I knew awaited me with the morning. I wanted this, and it was wonderful. But, though Haden’s lips were warm and his kiss passionate, that all encompassing tingle I’d felt with Tallow’s touch was absent.
“Good night,” I told him whe
n we finally parted.
He looked over to Cedar’s prone form and sighed. “Until tomorrow,” and he walked away.
“God, I thought he’d never leave.” Cedar was looking over at me.
“Were you awake the entire time?” I asked, my face flushed in embarrassment.
“Of course. I could not stop thinking about Serrot. He’s so...I don’t know. He’s not like he seems. He’s...tender; sweet.” She hugged herself.
“Tender? Serrot? Really?” I was having a hard time seeing him in that light.
“He was reciting poetry to me,” she said dreamily.
“Are you sure you’re not asleep? And what is poetry?”
“It is just the language of love, Winter. It is art with words.” She was doing that hugging thing again.
“I’m having a hard time picturing you as a fierce warrior right now.”
“I would kill all of our enemies if it would ensure that I could spend the rest of my days with him.”
“We’re talking about the same guy?” Cedar ignored my question.
“What about you and Haden? He seems to really like you,” she said slyly. Then she started making smooching noises.
“Do you think it wise to anger the Ghost?”
“What about Tallow?” she asked seriously.
“I don’t know about either, Cedar. Tallow and I are joined by a bond that can never be broken; in a way, we are family. But I’m not sure I can follow where he wants to lead me, and Haden is so present, so vital. There is no clear path to either of those men.”
“Sometimes early encounters are merely a stepping stone to more mature relationships.”
“Poetry?”
“In a way. That’s what Katrina said to Markovich when she left him for Peter.”
“I don’t think I want to take life advice from your romance novels.”
“There’s some truth to them.”
“Then maybe I do need to read one of those.”
Cedar was digging through her bag when we heard the scuffle of feet coming down the narrow corridor toward us. I poked my head out and saw two men about twenty feet away. They stopped just outside the room.
“Hello?” I called out to them.
“Haden has requested we watch over you two,” the taller of the two answered back.
“How sweet,” Cedar said to me.
I didn’t see it that way. “Why would we need armed guards? We are in a cave surrounded by the entire Klondike army.”
“He’s just being over-protective; obviously he cares a lot about you.”
“What if they aren’t meant to keep people out but rather to keep us in?” I asked Cedar.
“Come on, Winter. Do you really believe that? Haden should know we aren’t going anywhere. Although, who knows? Maybe that’s exactly what they’re for, especially since you wandered off just last night.”
“I didn’t tell him about that.”
“Don’t look at me that way! I didn’t say a word. He had a scout there as well. Remember?”
“Right...I’m sorry.”
“Do you want the book or not? I’m going to sleep.”
“I’ll take it. I’m not quite ready for sleep yet.”
I’d not gone more than a chapter or two when my eyelids began to droop. I was having a hard time getting interested in the book. The women were so far removed from our reality I could not empathize with their problems or really even understand them. They weren’t fighting for their lives, they did not go days with nothing more than a handful of berries to sustain them, and they pined for unobtainable men or another dozen pairs of shoes. They wished their breasts were larger or that their waists were slimmer. They cried when their “friends” spoke sharply to them or they weren’t invited to a party. They seemed weak. They were certainly incapable of living in my world. I did not envy them; I felt sorry for them. By the time I awoke, Cedar was already up and gone. The book I’d tried to read had fallen to the ground. I should have just buried it and told her I lost it.
“You’re up?” Cedar shouted from the cleaning cistern. “What did you think of the book?”
“Umm...interesting.” It was the best I could come up with.
Luckily Cedar liked hearing herself talk more than she liked listening to anyone else. “I found something back here.”
“And...?”
“And I want you to come and check it out with me.”
“Cedar, I’m not really a fan of going back there for fun.”
“Just do it, you big baby.”
“You’re calling me a baby?”
“You heard it here first; the Ghost is a big baby.”
“Fine, but if I get stuck it’s on you.”
“I was going to say something about all the food you’ve been eating lately.”
“That’s it.” I stuck my head through the opening and started the laborious job of wriggling through. At least there was no way Serrot was getting in here. When I finally poked through the other side, Cedar was sitting on a small stone outcropping. “You had better not have called me through that thing just to braid your hair.”
“There’s something down there,” she said in hushed tones, pointing into the pool.
“Like an animal?” I had visions of an alligator or a crocodile. I’d seen them in a book at the library. If one of those was in there, the last place I wanted to be was here. “Are you crazy? We should go,” I said, getting close to Cedar so I could yank her back.
“Keep your voice down. I don’t want the guards to hear us.”
“Last night you thought it was romantic. What changed?”
“Your words wormed their way into my head I guess. That’s what I get for having a paranoid friend. And no, it’s not an animal. There’s a hole.”
“Okay, there's a hole. What’s your point?”
“I don’t think anybody knows about it. It’s about three quarters down on the far side.”
“Cedar, I still don’t know where you’re going with this.”
She looked at me like I was an idiot, like I was missing something obvious. “I poked my head through. It’s big enough to fit my entire body.”
“It’s underwater.”
“Yes.”
“Cedar, you do know you swim about as well as I do, which is not at all.”
“Aren’t you curious to see what’s on the other side?”
“No, and trust me–it’s not a doorway to another realm or another time, like in your books.”
She seemed to frown at that like I’d just hit her thoughts perfectly and swatted them away.
“Besides, even if it did lead someplace else, chances are it’s all under water. And even if you do come up in another part of the cave, what are you going to do for light?”
“That’s the weird thing, Winter. When I stuck my head through, I think I could just make out this soft white light. It wasn’t bright, not at all–but it wasn’t pitch black either.”
I looked hard at the small pool, trying to get any kind of glimpse of this mysterious hole from my vantage point. The pool was kept fresh from some source, it could be an exit, I thought, which could potentially be something we needed. But why would I need to get away from the Klondikes? I trusted Haden completely...didn’t I? Tallow didn’t trust him...when had my feelings parted so decidedly from his? “But this is crazy, Cedar. If you get in trouble there’s not much I can do to help.”
“Let’s just try.” Before I could protest she had already slipped into the water.
“Hey, you two back there?” Haden called out from the sleeping quarters.
Cedar looked partly relieved and partly frustrated as she pulled herself back out. “I just got dry.”
“Yeah, almost done,” I told him.
“Great because your Fer...I mean Comanchokee friends have started to arrive and its getting a little, umm… interesting outside.”
“You coming?” I asked Cedar.
She nodded, but looked back to the water.
“Great.
I’ll see you out there.”
Chapter 18
Plans Made
“TRIED TO COME and see you last night.” Tallow had come up behind us as we were traveling through the cave. His fingers gripped my shoulder so tight I winced and pulled away.
“Sorry,” he said, but he didn’t look it.
“Well, here I am. What do you want?” I rubbed the sore spot.
“Have you thought any more about leaving?”
“Is that what you wasted your time about last night?”
“I would have convinced you if I hadn’t been stopped by Haden’s goons.”
Suddenly our night guard made perfect sense. Haden suspected Tallow might come with his friends to secret me out of here against my will; or maybe even with it. Tallow had changed from the boy I thought I knew right before my eyes. Or had he? Maybe the changes within me were allowing me to see him in a different light. Either way, I didn’t like it.
“I think maybe it was good they stopped you. What do you think would happen to the rest of our clan if I just disappeared?”
“I don’t care about the rest of them.”
“Gee, thanks,” Cedar said.
Tallow pursed his lips.
“Well, then I guess that’s where we differ, because I still do.”
“Winter, it seems like you have abandoned everything we planned and trained for. Brody said we need to remove ourselves as far from The War as possible, not become involved in someone else’s battles.”
“Well, Brody’s not here, is he? He couldn’t possibly have known what we would find out here. Tallow, how many times do I have to tell you I’m not going anywhere; are you willing to give up our friendship over this? Because that’s the way it is starting to look. It’s your plans that have changed. Not so very long ago it was you who said we can’t leave them behind.” I could not believe the role reversals, very recently we had been arguing on the other sides of this disagreement.
Tallow looked like he was going to break some blood vessels in his neck; and I thought he might scream. Instead, his voice was low, almost threatening. “You don’t get it, do you? Not at all. You are blinded by your desire for that scheming jerk, Haden. But I know you, Winter, the real you. The Truth is there, somewhere in that pretty little head of yours. I just hope you recognize it before it’s too late.”