At first, I felt shock, then slowly my shock went to full on rage. My blood was boiling, here I stand, before my father – before my brothers – before my club and yet again, I am being treated like I can’t make decisions for myself.
“No,” I whisper. With a shake of my head, I backed away from his seat.
“Ash,” he coaxes, holding his hand out to me.
“No! I refuse to let this happen to me, like I’m some fair maiden from the 1700’s! I’m not something you can just marry off! I’m a person!”
“We have no choice, Ashley!” Cracker stands up from his seat.
My feet halt to a stop and I snapped in that instant.
“The hell you don’t!” I spat, throwing my hands up in frustration. “This has nothing to do with you all. You’re talking about marrying me off without my consent, about branding me like one of the cattle we have! This is not going to happen.”
“Ashley, calm the hell down,” my father utters lowly.
“Calm the hell down,” I repeat back to him, shaking my head, the tears already building at the corners of my eyes. “I will not calm down. I know I’ve made a lot of bad choices. I’ve done some messed up things, I let you down, I let,” I immediately look over to Blackjack, seeing the emotion washing over his face. I shake my head and turn back to my father, “I’ve already suffered enough with one marriage. I refuse to let this one purchase my freedom!”
“Quiet yourself down, girl!” He roared all at once, his voice shaking through the entire room.
Everyone grew quiet and my skin was ripped away from its warmth. A cold like tension fell upon us and I was left to look down to the floor with my arms wrapped around me, speechless. This. All of this was so mind numbing that I couldn’t even begin to speak again.
“Now,” He clears his throat, finding his way to take control of the room. “All of you have been selected as options for my baby girl. Specifically, Zane and Kade.”
I blinked in disbelief as I saw Kade and Zane both sit up in their seats at my father’s attention.
“The two of you have been adopted into my family and have sworn to protect your sister at all costs. To save time and Ashley’s wits, will either of you step up to claim her as yours.”
Zane looked to his brother as they both exchanged thoughts passively to one another. I couldn’t believe they were considering it. After some time, they finally met Fist’s gaze and Kade opened his mouth to speak––
“I’m not marrying either of them,” I interrupt suddenly.
My father broke his icy gaze to stare me down in contemplation.
“And why the hell not?” He demands.
I bit the inside of my cheek hard, forcing myself to look him in the eye.
“They’re my brothers,” I deadpan.
“Oh, that is horseshit!” Fist barks back.
“Would you just listen to me?”
“Why should I?” He throws his hands up in the air furiously, “Your brothers have absolutely no blood relationship to you. They’ve sworn their faith, loyalty, and their absolute integrity to bring this family it’s pride! You’ve been raised no different and, yet you got married to some sonofabitch with a mouth and left the safety of home!”
“Dad,” I quip, unable to keep the tears from running down my cheeks.
“So, help me, Ash. I will hold you down and have that tattoo artist brand you TODAY”
I could only shake my head, trying to hold my thoughts together. Everything was spiraling out of control and it was beyond anything I was prepared for. Control was but a word that was one phrase away from slipping out of my fingers. Just how did he expect me to hand myself over to marriage so easily. How did any of them expect for me to put trust in them after what I’ve been through.
“Dear, God,” I mutter to myself, praying for the moment to cease. “There has to be another way.”
“There isn’t.” My Uncle Tex insists. “They want proof of your brand otherwise the jig is up, darling. If they call us out as liars, they can just as easily force you out.”
“It’s for your own good,” Dad lamented to me. “We do this today.”
“I just,” I quip, before my voice cracks.
“Can I just stop you guys right here?” Dixon interrupts us both.
My father turns his attention back to him, crossing his arms against his chest.
“What is it now, smart ass?”
Dixon held his hands up, innocent as ever.
“I have been out for a while, but I’d like to mention that I’m currently spoken for. If my little lady even knew what this thing was about, she’d be out for your hide, Prez.”
Cracker couldn’t help but chuckle at the spark of good news. Hearing that from Dixon made Dad shake his head while muttering something to himself.
“Get yourself back home, boy,” Cracker comes around to pat Dixon on the back before sending him off to the doors.
“Will do. I’ll let the Missus’ know you boys say hello.”
Dixon gives us all a nod before turning his head back to me. “I’m sorry you’re going through this, Ash. Any one of these men would be lucky to have you but you need to decide on what’s truly best for you. Only you’d know.”
He was right. At this point, it was too late to turn back. Dixon had left us with the same opened can of worms and the thought of this arrangement going by so fast without a finger of control was making me sick to my stomach. The lot of them had me blindsided without even a day to process my options.
The one alternative that I would never accept was returning to Harry and his goons. I wouldn’t even dare to mention Zane or Kade meeting me down the aisle (regardless of all the crazy shit we’ve been through). Eric, Owen, and the rest of the brothers were people that I barely even knew, and it didn’t seem right getting hitched to another man I didn’t know. I’d rather kill Roach than ever consider branding his name on my skin, so help me God.
Zoro, was known for being a complete freak in bed and I didn’t like the idea of waking up to him. From all the rumors his women mentioned about him, there wasn’t one that made me warm up to his character in the slightest. Even now as I glanced at him for a second, I could just barely pick up the little flick his tongue made at me.
With a grimace, I held myself close as my arms tightened around me whole.
“How can you expect me to just pick someone?”
My father throws his hands up, exasperated. “Kiddo, just pick one of the twins. You’ve known them longest and they’ll be damned if they don’t take care of you.”
“I’m not picking either of them,” I fought back before facing them. “Zane, Kade, you know you mean the world to me. Which is why you deserve to marry yourselves off to girls you actually like.”
“Shucks, Ash, don’t get all sappy on us already,” Kade pipes up.
I rolled my eyes.
“I’m serious! Don’t be like me and marry someone so easily. Do it for love. Both of you!”
“Ashley,” Zane mutters, wincing at my mention.
“I’m getting too old for this shit either way. If Harry wants to get me, he’ll have to fight me tooth and nail to pry me out of here.” I counter, locking eyes with my father.
“It’s not that easy, darling.” He scratches the back of his neck. “We need time to bade them off. If they take you––”
“Enough.” Blackjack finally speaks, the rest of us going silent.
The breath in my lungs went still as I watched him rise from his seat, the chair screeching underneath him as he did. My Dad draws his attention from me to the man that was now walking his way up to the head of the table. The closer he came to us, the more I could feel myself shrink up in disbelief.
As Blackjack approached my father, he gave him a look of acknowledgement that he needed to take the room. Dad took a moment to observe him by the feat of his expression.
“Brothers,” He starts, “You’ve taken me in as your own when I had nowhere to go. You’ve been here for me every day th
at I’ve needed you, and not just when I’ve needed you – but when Dex has too. You are truly family to me, and to my boy.”
The room goes silent, every one of us watching Blackjack.
“Ashley,” Blackjack lifts his eyes up to meet mine.
My breath hitches up to the back of my throat as I force myself to nod.
“To this day, I want it to be known that I have every claim on you and swear that I will do everything in as well as beyond my power to protect you till the day I die. Do you understand?”
At this point, I could only nod. Was this truly happening? I looked to my father – the man who I’d expected to scream and shout, telling Blackjack no. Instead, well, instead the unexpected happened.
“Perfect,” Fist mutters under his breath before pinching the bridge of his nose, “Now get the fuck out of here and don’t come back until she’s got your name on her skin.”
Chapter 11
Blackjack
There sure as hell wasn’t any sense in it. Not a damn ounce of sense in me. One moment, I’ve made my resolve to stay the hell away from her before I fucked up anymore of her life than necessary. Now, I’ve sworn myself to be involved in every part of that life until the day I die. Before I knew it, I had my hand around her wrist and we were both walking out of the church’s doors as if the devil was chasing us down. When we stopped outside the front doors that went to the clubhouse, I looked around the area trying to remember just where I parked my ride. Despite all the focus I could gather, my attention retraced back to her and the way she was breathing hard with her hands clutching her knees.
“Jesus,” I mutter while my eyes searched the perimeter.
A glint of light winked back at me and sure enough, I found my Harley tucked behind Dixon’s obnoxious red truck.
“You okay?” She manages.
Ashley shouldn’t have asked me that. I didn’t think ahead about this and we didn’t have much time to begin with. The two of us really needed to get a move on.
“I’ll be fine,” I assure her and hook her arm to mine. “We have to go.”
I pulled her down the steps with me quickly before we strode over to my bike.
“Go where?” Her voice drops, demanding to know.
“You heard your father, Ash,” My voice drops with hers, all my humor gone. “If the Bears don’t see a brand on your skin with my name on it, they can just take you. Simple as that.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me, Blackjack,” She objects and stops in her tracks, sliding her arm out from mine. I stopped with her and exhaled thickly into my hand before dragging my fingers through my hair. There was much to do, and we couldn’t just stop with every bump in the road of understanding.
“I’m not, Ashley. I’m surprised the fuckers didn’t get through the gates by force.”
“Those fuckers can’t pull through a heist with a hostage.” She steps forward, giving my chest a firm poke. “Do you honestly think they’re going to get what they want just because they’re just shy of measuring up to par with my father?”
“I think it’s absolutely reckless if we underestimate them either way.” I give her a hard look.
“Blackjack, this is ridiculous!” She threw her hands up. “Why are we forcing ourselves into this?”
“If you thought it was so ridiculous, why didn’t you stay in church and argue with us about it?” I challenge hotly. Because she didn’t want to. She won’t admit that, but it’s plain as day. Ashley and I have been drawn together since she was a teenager.
“Excuse me?” She narrows her eyes, heat dragging in her voice.
“You heard me. Why didn’t you stay in church?” I ask her once again. “Why come out here with me.”
“I needed to get out,” she replies quickly.
“You could’ve gotten out with anyone else.” I countered, gesturing back to the clubhouse doors. “Why didn’t you?”
“Because I fucking trust you. Okay?”
I opened my mouth to say something, only to close it back down. She took me by surprise and I didn’t know how to respond to that. Any of it.
“But,” she starts muttering lowly. “It doesn’t help that you’ve been so distant with me.”
My eyes picked up to her face and the guilt flushed my entire focus away. Ashley truly looked defeated. Her eyes lost their prisms of blue only to fade away in a tired grey smog. There was less sureness to her and I was to blame for that. It made me clench my fists at the sight of her fading before my eyes.
“After the day at Boots,” I start, scratching the back of my head as I contemplated what to say.
“Yeah?” She lifts her head back up, eyes all weary from drowning in her tears. It hurt me to see her this vulnerable.
“Nothing. Never mind.” I shake my head, turning my back to her to approach the bike.
“God damn it, Rob. Tell me!” She begs with frustration.
“I can’t!” I holler back and climb on the Harley. “Now are you coming with me or not?”
Ashley looked at me hard from where she stood, and I knew she was restraining every tiny bone in her body from pushing me off the bike. She crosses her arms, shaking her head like she had any choice.
“Damn it, Ashley,” I curse, growing more frustrated with myself. “I swear, if you don’t get on this fucking bike, I’ll chase you through Montana until you sit your ass down.”
“Is that a threat?” She dares, crossing her arms over her chest.
I breathed in slowly.
“You have no idea.”
She watched me from a distance, as if to decide whether it was worth all the trouble to have a big spat over this. Thinking for the best, she finally dragged her feet out of her spot and approached the bike with caution. I twisted the key and revved up for takeoff. Her foot went down the side foot holder behind me and I took her hand when she lifted her leg across the other side. I felt her settle down behind me, her thighs closing on my legs as she slid her arms around my waist, holding her chest close to my back.
I took a deep breath as I felt her shift behind me, every pull of friction against us making me tense up more by the second.
With a low grunt, I kicked the floor and we were off with the wheels running underneath our feet. As the bike hummed against us, I could feel Ashley’s chin resting down to my back with her arms tightening around me. I felt reluctant to breathe––as if any move I made would trigger her to stop trusting me as she did. As much as I wanted to deny it, her touch made me feel better.
We rode out of the parking lot. It had gotten dark since we’d been in church and the moon stared down at our backs in the lonely skies, like some sort of reassurance that the day was ending. I kept my head low as I could as we ventured into the woods. Even as we were now, I couldn’t be ignorant of the possible dangers lurking in the shadows. It seemed impossible that the Bears would undergo the extent of sneaking into the club but where there’s a will, there’s a way.
I still couldn’t believe the prospect didn’t see the man that left the package on our steps. Our security has been sloppy and all it took was one bullet to start a war. It didn’t matter if our side was playing it safe. All I knew was that the Bears would use any means to win. Even if it meant crossing through our gates.
My eyes darted from tree to tree, gripping the bike’s gears tightly into my palm with the sweat threatening to drip from my brow. I could hear the woods shuffle around me, as if there was a creature following us down the path. I knew better however. The woods in this town were always known for their eerie sounds. It was never what you heard that should scare you, but what you saw.
“What’s up with you?” Ashley mutters in my ear.
“Hm?”
I turned my head slightly to hear.
“Hm,” she breathes, resting her cheek down to my back. “I thought you were upset with me and, yet I catch you smiling.”
“Tch,” I shake my head, turning my attention back to the road. “I’m not upset with you. Just thinking.”
“Nothing. Something silly.”
“Well if it’s nothing, tell me anyway,” she insists. The corners of my lips give into a smirk.
“I was thinking about Mad-Dog.”
Suddenly, her warm cheek leaves my back before blurting out, “Billy Joel?”
“Yeah.” I respond casually.
“What for?” She inquires, arms relaxing a little.
“I’m just thinking about how he’s so easily stressed by these woods. Do you remember when he told us that a wolverine was chasing him in broad daylight, but he couldn’t see it?”
She laughs, “He had us worried that he might be on drugs.”
“Yeah, you remember,” I smile, shaking my head at the memory of it all. “Cracker went with some of the men to hunt down this almighty wolverine. Swore he’d hang it on his mantle if he got the bastard.”
Ashley snorts, “What did he end up shooting?”
“Nothing,” I shrug, feeling her come back closer to me. “It was just a family of beavers building a dam upstream. I think he scared them more than they scared him.”
“Poor things.” She exhales a low sigh. “Why are you telling me this?”
“Just wanted to let you know that you shouldn’t give your ex-husband the satisfaction of being scared.”
“I’m not scared,” she says between her teeth.
“Yeah, you are.”
She stayed silent, but I didn’t feel her arms loosen up from me. “Maybe I am.”
I let out a drag of a breath, “Ashley, there’s no shame in it. You’re smart to be scared. It’s a rationalized fear that you’re still trying to overcome.”
“I don’t want it to hold me back.”
“It won’t,” I snap, watching the trees above us fade away to reveal the sky. “You’re the daughter of Fist Monroe. In high school, the reason why you didn’t get as many dates was because the guys were too damn scared to talk to you.”
“What are you––”
“Jerome Rivers––the captain of the damn football team was too scared to talk to you because he didn’t know who would beat him up first. You or your father.”
Havoc- Reapers MC Boxset Page 24