by Quinn Loftis
Lilly’s lips turned up. “I used your power to zap Peri.” She couldn’t help but sound proud.
Cypher chuckled. “I’m glad I could give you the ability to zap the high fae. She’s no doubt earned a few zappings in her time.”
Lilly glanced back at the book. “So that’s all the book says? That a clan leader can challenge a new royal bloodline ruler? Seems like an awfully big book for such a simple explanation.”
“There’s a bunch of rules,” Cypher said, “but what the asshat, as you called him, probably doesn’t remember or hasn’t bothered to research is that challenges are not to be made in times of war.”
“I would definitely consider this wartime,” said Lilly. “But that’s not going to be enough to stop him, is it?”
Cypher shook his head. “No. Lysander has always been an ambitious prick. He never stood a chance against me, and he knew it. Now that I’m gone, he sees an opportunity.” Cypher held her hand tighter as he used his other hand to tip her chin up so she was looking into his eyes. “You can do this. And you must do this on your own. Gerick is going to want to help. He mustn’t. Not all of Lysander’s clan is going to agree with him, but they will back him because he’s their leader. If you show any weakness at all, even if you win, they will never truly see you as their queen.”
Lilly started to nod, but Cypher held her chin still.
“No mercy, Lilly. I don’t care if you have to imagine him strangling Jacque or doing some other horrible act. You show him no mercy.”
Lilly took a shaky breath and nodded. “Okay.” She reached up and took his hand. “Okay, Cypher.”
He leaned forward and pressed his lips firmly to hers. It only lasted a moment, but when he pulled back, he touched his forehead to hers. “I know you can take his ass out. And even if he yields, you kill him.”
“What?”
“When I said no mercy, I meant none. Not even if he yields.”
“Isn’t that a little ruthless?” Lilly asked.
“It is. But it’s necessary. It’s what I would do at a time like this. For him to challenge you in a time of war is ruthless and dangerous for our people. When he comes and makes the public challenge, you need to read the actual written rules, which include the war stipulation. The people will understand what he’s doing. They will not think you cruel for killing him even if he submits.”
“He won’t yield,” Lilly said, knowing in her heart it was true. Someone like Lysander, willing to cause dissension during such a time, would see yielding as a weakness. He’d rather die.
“No, he won’t,” Cypher agreed. “But he might pretend to in order to catch you off guard. So, no matter what, you kill him.” He leaned forward and pressed his hand to the book which began to glow. After several seconds, he pulled his hand away and turned to her, a smile on his handsome face. “You should be able to read it now.”
Lilly rolled her eyes. “Dammit, Cy, now I have to read. I was going to use the excuse to Peri that I couldn’t read it because of the whole language barrier.”
Cypher waved his hand at the book, and it flipped open. “Just read that page. That’s the one you will need to read to the clans when Lysander shows his asshat face.”
She laughed. “I totally just pictured his face as an ass with eyes.”
Cypher grinned. It was one of his boyish grins that always made her heart beat a little faster. “It’s easy to picture, considering he has such a charming personality.”
Lilly leaned forward and cupped her mate’s face in her hands. “Thank you,” she whispered. She ran her thumb across his bottom lip, his grin slowly fading. She wanted to beg him to never stop grinning at her. Lilly wanted to beg him to figure out a way to stay with her so that she didn’t have to do this on her own.
“You never have to thank me, my love,” he said softly. “It is an honor to have the privilege of being here for you when I can, for however long that is.”
“Forever,” Lilly whispered. “I will need you forever.”
Cypher said nothing, but she could see in his eyes that he knew their time would come to an end soon. She wanted to grab hold of him and shake him and make him promise to never leave her. Lilly couldn’t stand the sorrow she saw in his eyes, so she moved closer to him and pressed her head to his chest. She was lying to herself, but it was what she needed to do. For now. She had to pretend he was with her and would be always, just like they’d planned. She had to tell herself that she wasn’t just fighting for the future of their people, or for the whole of the world, but for them as well. Because she still had moments where fighting for everyone else wasn’t enough. Deep down, she knew when they reached the end of this road, when the dust settled, and the Order was defeated, he would no longer be by her side. She knew it was selfish, but she actually dreaded that day. They could stand victorious. One day, the supernatural races might be safe, the humans free of enslavement, and Alston, Ludcarab, and all the vampires destroyed. That day wouldn’t feel like a victory to Lilly. Because at the end of it all, she would still be alone.
“Beloved,” Cypher said, his voice gentle as he held her tighter. He could always tell when she was having one of her moments, when she couldn’t pretend this was real. She couldn’t make herself believe he wasn’t gone and that they were really in their room together. “I will be here for as long as you need me,” he reminded her.
She pressed her face harder against him and breathed in his scent. Tears ran down her cheeks and her chest tightened. His words were meant to comfort. Instead, they broke her a little more. Lilly knew that day would come. She would never stop wanting him, but there would come a day when she wouldn’t need him. She knew it because she remembered the day when she realized she no longer needed Dillon. Though, at the time, she had been sure that day would never come. The memory took over unbidden as her love held her.
“She’s perfect,” the doctor said as she wrapped the baby, her baby, and brought the child to its mother. Lilly had labored for hours. There’d been no one to help her. No one to hold her hand. No one to remind her to breathe or assure her she was doing great, as there had been in all the damn birthing videos she’d watched. It had just been Lilly and the medical staff. But she’d done it. Lilly had gone through nine months of pregnancy, worked two jobs, gotten a nursery ready, put a damn crib together with the crappiest instructions ever written, and endured twenty-seven hours of labor all on her own.
She reached out and took the small bundle from Dr. Freeman. Tears filled her eyes as she stared down at the little girl who was now her entire world.
“What’s her name?” the doctor asked.
“Jacquelyn,” Lilly said, her eyes still on her baby. “Her name is Jacquelyn, and you’re right. She is perfect.” She couldn’t take her eyes off the little miracle. Lilly knew from Dillon how hard it was for the Canis lupus to produce offspring, and yet, here was her little Jacque. “It’s you and me, kiddo,” she whispered. “And we’re going to be just fine.”
The memory faded as she felt another presence in the room. “You were never alone, Lilly of the sprites. Never.” The Great Luna’s voice filled her mind, and the goddess’s peace filled Lilly’s heart. Her lips turned up in a small smile as Cypher held her to him. Even back then, some part of Lilly had known she wasn’t actually alone, that she was being watched over by someone up there. She just didn’t know who. Maybe that’s why she’d finally realized that, though she wanted Dillon, she didn’t need him to survive.
The smile faded as she clung to her mate. She wasn’t there yet. Not with Cypher. “I love you so much,” she told him, as she did every night.
“And I you, my strong, sweet Lilly.”
Chapter 14
“A little free advice: before you kill someone, consider the fact that it might cause people not to trust you … even if you offer them cotton candy.” ~Myanin
Tenia hugged Torion and again made him swear to keep his power secret. Then she bit back tears and took several deep breaths to prepare herself to f
ace the wolf outside. She knew he was still there. She could feel him through the bond. Tenia hated the fact that there was a part of her that found comfort in the damn thing. For the first time in a very long time, she didn’t feel alone. But she knew it was a false sense of security. She was still alone. She couldn’t trust him.
She pulled the door closed and forced herself to meet Skender’s silver eyes. “I don’t trust you,” she said.
“That’s okay. I’ll still protect him with my life,” Skender said, and the conviction she heard in his voice was like iron.
“If you hurt him, or allow anyone else to hurt him, I will ruin you.”
“You already have,” he replied.
“No,” she growled. “What I will do to you will make anything Alston could do look like child’s play,” she said as she stepped closer, keeping her voice low. The confusion of emotions coursing through her made her shake. She wanted to rejoice at the idea of having a partner, someone to stand at her side, to share the weight of the heavy burdens on her shoulders … but not like this. Tenia wouldn’t stand with the enemy. She glanced around, realizing she’d been standing there much too long, simply glaring at him. He wasn’t what she needed, even if there was a part of her that wanted him. There wasn’t anyone else in the corridor, but that didn’t mean there weren’t ears listening.
“I would never do anything to hurt you or Torion,” Skender said, using their bond as if he, too, realized there might be unseen ears listening. His voice was urgent and demanding. It was clear he wanted desperately for her to believe him. “I don’t expect you to trust me, Tenia. But I’ll keep telling you and showing you. I will protect him if I do nothing else good in my life. Torion will be safe.”
Tenia stared into his eyes, her jaw clenched tightly. Dammit! I wish I could trust him. To know that her precious young was safe when she couldn’t be with him. That would mean more to her than anything. “I don’t know why the Great Luna has done this,” she said, using the bond because she couldn’t say this out loud. “But I trust her. Why should I trust you?”
“Because she made me yours,” he practically whispered as his hand reached up and gently cupped her cheek. “I am not worthy of you or your son. But I swear this to you, Tenia. No harm will come to him.”
Tenia felt a tear escape her eye, and Skender tenderly swiped it away. She couldn’t stay there any longer without drawing attention. She gave him a single nod and turned on her heel, heading toward her meeting with Myanin. Tenia prayed to the Great Luna that maybe, just maybe, the wolf was telling her the truth.
Myanin could tell something was bothering Tenia as the fae approached. “Are you all right?” she asked. Though they still didn’t know each other all that well, the look on Tenia’s face was easy to interpret. The fae seemed like she was ready to murder someone.
Tenia pushed the doors open without answering, and Myanin followed. “Are we going to the warlock mountain?” Tenia asked.
“Yes.”
The fae held out her arm, and Myanin rested her hand on it. They flashed, but instead of appearing inside of the queen’s quarters like last time, they materialized in a forest. “We’re just outside the perimeter of the warlock stronghold,” Tenia explained.
“Okay, does that mean we have something to talk about before we go in? Like why you look like you’re going to gut the first person that says the wrong thing to you?”
“I met my mate.” Tenia said the word “mate” as if it was the vilest tasting word in any language.
Myanin’s brow rose. “I was unaware that fae took mates.” She’d heard the whispers that there had been recent matings between Canis lupus and fae, but it was still hard to believe.
“We don’t, or at least we didn’t. Not in the way other supernaturals do. But things are changing,” Tenia said.
Myanin couldn’t help but snort. “That seems to be a common theme as of late. The winds of change and all that.” She paused and watched Tenia. The fae fidgeted with her clothes in a most un-faelike manner, straightening her already straight vest and tugging on her bracers. “You don’t look too happy about your new mate.”
“What gave it away? The note of disgust in my voice or the look of disgust on my face?” Tenia snapped.
Myanin’s lips dropped into a frown. Up until now, she’d seen nothing but kindness and patience from the fae. “And here I thought finding a mate was supposed to be a good thing. What’s the problem?”
Tenia huffed. “Uh, how about the fact that he works for the Order?”
“We both work for the Order.”
“Not really,” Tenia said. “We’re pretending. And I’m only doing it because I have no choice, unless I want my child killed, or worse, turned into one of Ludcarab and Alston’s pets. And you’ve had a complete change of heart, broken spirit, crushed soul, the whole nine yards. You’re new and different, though still sort of creepy.”
Myanin’s eyes widened. “Okay. Ouch. But thank you … I think.” She stared at the fae who continued to fidget. “Did you speak with him?” Myanin folded her arms in front of her chest and leaned against a tree. She assumed they weren’t heading in to speak to the warlock queen until Tenia calmed down. Maybe talking it out was what she needed. Myanin was turning over a new leaf, so to speak, the whole new and different as Tenia had so sweetly pointed out. She was trying to be less selfish. The Great Luna had done exactly as she’d said and given Myanin a new heart. Now, the djinn wanted to care about someone else. It was weird. First, she’d reached out to the warlock queen. Hell, she’d even shared her cotton candy. And now, she was going to listen to Tenia’s problems. She was practically a new person, except for the creepy thing, apparently. Myanin almost smiled to herself, but the scathing look Tenia sent her kept the djinn’s lips in check lest the fae decided the smile was because Myanin was enjoying the fae’s distress. Which she wasn’t. She was over male drama. She’d had enough of her own to last several lifetimes.
“Unfortunately, Canis lupus males sometimes know instantly when they meet their mates. Though I have heard that for some it takes longer for the mate bond to become entirely clear. That didn’t seem to be the case for my wolf,” Tenia said. Her face scrunched up as if she’d just smelled something bad. She shook her head. “Not my wolf,” she corrected. “I mean this wolf. He isn’t mine. I don’t want him to be mine.”
It sounded to Myanin as if the fae was trying hard to convince herself the words were true. “Does that mean he was able to link with your mind?”
Tenia nodded. “Even now I can feel him. I’m blocking him out, but he said powerful emotions can weaken the walls keeping him out. Which isn’t good for me because I’m feeling lots of strong emotions right now.”
“What else did he say?” Myanin asked. She’d tucked a small amount of cotton candy in one of her pants many pockets and, in hindsight, was thankful she’d chosen to do so. The djinn had already multiple times thanked the Great Luna that her beloved cotton candy no longer tasted like ash. She pulled out the bag, ignored the eye roll Tenia sent her way, and pulled out a small chunk, popping the sugary goodness into her mouth.
“He said he’d protect Torion,” Tenia admitted, albeit begrudgingly.
“That’s a good thing,” Myanin pointed out as she put another bite in her mouth.
“Only if I can truly trust him.”
“Mates don’t lie,” Myanin said. “Or at least that’s what I’ve heard. Canis lupus are the loyalist of the loyal with their mates.”
“I hope it’s true.” Tenia took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “It’s not like I have a choice on whether to trust him. He’s there and I’m here. I told him if he lets any harm come to my son that what I would do to him would make Alston look sane.”
Myanin grinned. “Mothers are protective of their young. I know the Canis lupus also feel strongly for their pups. If he said he’d protect your Torion then I think you can believe him.”
“Even though he works for the Order?”
Myanin
shrugged. “I’ve never heard of a Canis lupus turning on his true mate. Not once in all of my existence.”
Tenia seemed to think about this for a few minutes and then nodded. “I haven’t either.”
Myanin finished her cotton candy and put the empty bag back in her pocket. “Are you ready to proceed?” She motioned toward the mountain.
Tenia sighed. “Might as well get it over with. Facing Perizada might actually be worse than finding out I have a werewolf mate that has ties to the Order.”
“She’s that scary?” Myanin asked.
“Not so much scary as … crazy,” Tenia said. “No, no, not so much crazy as … batshit insane when she gets irritated, which seems to happen a lot.” A tiny smile formed on the fae’s lips that made it clear she had at least some affection toward the high fae. “You never really know what she’s going to do.”
“A little crazy is good,” Myanin said.
Tenia frowned. “On some people. But I think maybe you should reign your crazy in.”
“I’m not crazy,” Myanin said matter-of-factly.
“Yes you are.” Tenia walked over and held out her arm. “Anyone who tells you differently is straight-up lying to you.”
Myanin placed her hand on the fae’s again and shrugged. “I’m working on myself. I can’t fix everything all at once. Crazy might have to be the last thing I fix.”
Tenia snorted. “Great.” Then they flashed.
When they appeared in the queen’s chambers, Lilly was standing with her back against the wall. It was obvious she’d decided she would not be caught unaware again. Myanin had texted her about thirty minutes ago.
“You’re late,” the queen said as she looked down at the phone in her hand.
A second later, Myanin found herself pushed against the wall with a fae blade pressed against her throat. A small but very powerful fae—Perizada, she presumed—glared at her.