by Kate Stone
Our laughter broke the tension.
"Speaking of, any chance you want to help me spend my money on a bigger apartment for us? All three of us, if you want?" I asked her.
She punched me on the arm, smiling. "I thought you’d never ask. But first, let’s spend some of your slutty money on an outfit for your date tonight. You wore the only dress you own last night."
We’d ditched Liam at the apartment as we skipped off to the mall, somewhere I hadn’t been since I was Liam’s age. He’d expressed an active disinterest in accompanying us, and I honestly couldn’t blame him. I didn’t want to go either. I hated shopping, but I knew that with Amber by my side that I wouldn’t have to worry about what matched what, or which style was in right now, or what cuts were flattering on my figure. I had to follow the little steam engine that was Amber and put on whatever she told me to.
In the end, I let her talk me into buying a number of the options she’d had me try on, and we nearly filled the trunk of the cab we took home.
"Hey, you have the money, and do you want to have to go out shopping every single time you have to look nice?"
I didn’t. Despite all the things we’d picked out, there was a particular dress that Amber and I had completely agreed was the one for tonight, for what was my first "real" date with Alex.
It was a dark red dress with a subtle cross-hatch pattern that nipped in under my rib cage before flaring out to accentuate my hips. I wasn’t quite as elegant as the black lace number, but it made me feel feminine and cute — a foreign sensation in and of itself. Amber had convinced me to buy a new pair of heeled booties to go with it. She’d also strong-armed me into updating my nonexistent lingerie collection because Alex would want to rip that dress right off me. I wasn’t afraid to admit that I depended on Amber for things like this. She had that mystical feminine intuition that I’d always been confused by.
When we made it back to the apartment with precious little time to spare before my date, Liam looked a bit more than startled at the mass of purchases that we were trying to smuggle past the living room into my bedroom. He actually started to follow us down the hall.
"Um, Case? Did you win the lottery or something?" he asked.
"Nah, I robbed a bank." I said, hoping that he’d drop it.
"Uh-huh." He didn’t sound convinced. "You going on another date tonight?"
I felt a punch of guilt hit me in the gut. He’d just gotten here and Amber had spent more time with him than I had. I let Amber take the rest of our shopping spree to my room.
"Yeah, I’m sorry Liam." I said. I really meant it. "I promise that this isn’t the norm. How about you find something that you’d like to do in the city tomorrow and we’ll make a day of it?"
I imagined that my face scrunched up in the same way that Liam’s did when we were skeptical of something. We did look an awful lot alike and there were times during his growth spurts that we could almost pass as twins. Amber had told me that she had found it kind of creepy when she and Liam had first met, especially since there was six years between us.
"Sure, I’ll google it or something." Liam shrugged and dropped the subject and returned to his spot in front of the TV.
"You’re an awful liar," Amber whispered before shoving me into the restroom to get ready. "Now hurry up or you’ll be late!"
A few minutes late to our seven o’ clock date, I’d rushed into what I hoped was the correct "best sushi place in town," according to Alex, and spotted him immediately. He was wearing a grey button-down shirt, rolled at the cuffs to show off his forearms.
"Hi, I’m so sorry that I’m late," I said.
Alex smiled and his eyes roved over me. "Hardly. You look lovely and I’d say you are worth the wait."
Once we’d sat down, Alex didn’t open the menu but instead drummed his fingers against the tabletop. "I was thinking that we could start with a couple orders of salmon sashimi and some sake, then go from there. How does that sound?"
I opened my menu anyway, trying to catch my breath in as subtle a manner as possible. "Yeah, that sounds good to me," I said.
"Good, because I already ordered," he told me with a smile.
We talked a bit about his day dealing with corporate nonsense and how my brother was settling in with me but I realized that there were some things we needed to talk about if we were going to have a real relationship. I was antsy as all hell and it was making my marginal adequacy with chopsticks even worse. I set down my chopsticks a bit more forcefully than intended, startling Alex.
"Is everything alright?" he asked.
I decided to borrow a page from Mr. Pragmatic’s book and be direct. That was terrifying, to say the very least.
"Maybe," I said. "Can I say something?"
He set down his chopsticks as well and turned his full attention to me. "By all means."
Geronimo.
"Alright, so, I like you." I paused, locking my gaze on a patch of chipped paint on the wall behind his left shoulder. "I mean, as a person, I think that I have feelings for you. I know that sounds crazy since we only just met, but that’s what it is."
He nodded. "It’s mutual."
Damn it. He wasn’t supposed to say anything yet, I cursed internally. I needed momentum to get through this conversation. I couldn’t make eye contact yet, I didn’t want to see what his face was doing until after I’d said my piece.
"And I want to make sure that we’re completely on the same page, no matter the unconventional circumstances that led to us meeting. So, I have some questions."
Alex refilled our sake cups and told me to go ahead, though I could hear a distinct strain in his voice.
"I know that I’m not the first girl that you’ve had last night’s sort of arrangement with. Correct?"
He nodded again. "You are not the first I’ve met through that site, but you are the first that did not leave right after drinks."
"Is this what you would do with them as well?"
"Define ‘this’."
"Is any of it different? The things you’ve told me about yourself. The personal things. Asking me on a date today?"
"It’s different," Alex said, sounding uncomfortable. "The things I’ve told you, that I’ve asked you to tell me about yourself, even if it hasn’t been that much, and there’s a lot that you don’t know about me, I don’t normally do that. I try to keep things very black and white so that there is no room for complications. I mean it when I say that it’s you who is different. You make me want to change, even though in the grand scheme of things, I’ve known you for less than a heartbeat. I don’t know what it is about you, but meeting you has changed my views on relationships. I’ve never asked a girl that I’ve given money on a date before."
That was a lot. I wanted to take a moment to process it all, but I was worried that I might lose my nerve if I let any silence grow between us.
"What is it about that site, about that type of girl, then? I can’t help but wonder how you’ll remain interested in me when I’m no longer..." I lowered my already soft voice, "untouched."
"Ah, that. That’s a bit of a misunderstanding. I don’t necessarily have a thing for girls who haven’t had sex before. I just didn’t want anything that might resemble a relationship in the slightest. I suppose that I told myself that these girls who were selling their virginity, they must have a reason, and if I had the power to give them the cash they needed and as decent of a first encounter as possible, why shouldn’t I?" He ran his hand through his hair. "I realize that doesn’t paint me in a better light."
"So you’ve never actually had a girl stay with you?" I found that hard to believe.
He shook his head. "They all ran off before we ever got to the elevator. I was stunned that you didn’t. I guess I’m kind of intimidating.
"And now, with me, do you want a relationship with me?"
"Yes. Last night I thought I’d never see you again, but you were all I could think about. I never expected this, but meeting you has made me want a relationship.
I want to find out if there’s something between us worth holding onto."
It felt as though my brain and emotions were catapulted into overdrive but I didn’t know what to do with this information. He struck me as incredibly honest and he put himself in the most vulnerable position he had been in for a long time. How the tables had turned.
"Okay, last question. Is it going to be weird if there is something between us, knowing that you paid me so much money for my first time?"
I appreciated that he took a second before answering that one.
"You know, I don’t think it will. I know that you need that money for school and for your brother. I already care about you and what you’re going through. As that caring grows, I can only imagine that I would be happier to know that I was the one who was able to help you."
This time I let the silence blossom, forming a sort of bubble around our little table and isolating us from rest of the diners around us. Slowly, the butterflies I felt when I looked at Alex returned. I met his gaze and smiled at him. I would have never met a man like Alex in my regular life. His payment last night put me on a more even footing with him, made me feel like I could hold my own in the relationship, like we could be equal partners despite the difference in our age.
"Alright, then. I have a proposal for you now, Mr. Pragmatic."
He smiled back at me. "Is that so?"
"Quite. I say that we have a lot more sushi. I will allow you exactly two chances to laugh at my complete inability to eat sushi correctly. And then I say that we get out of here because I desperately want you. What do you think?"
He raised his sake. "That’s the best plan I’ve ever heard."
After dinner, Alex and I took a cab back to the same hotel and headed straight up to the room. I interlaced my fingers with his as we headed to the elevator. Once inside, he kissed me deeply and backed me up against one of the mirrored panels. I saw the reflection of my hands pulling him closer to me through fluttering lashes. Barely a few seconds into our kiss, the elevator stopped on a floor a few stops short of ours. We lurched apart as a chatty family of four filed in and squeezed into the elevator with us. They were so interested in the otters at the aquarium they didn't notice we were short of breath and could barely keep our hands off each other.
Shivers raced across my skin as I watch the floors tick by until ding and it was our stop. When we finally made it to the room after what seemed like a century, we slammed the door shut at the same moment that our bodies crashed together. We were a clumsy and fevered tangle of limbs trying to pull clothes off each other.
The difference between this and last night was almost indescribable. There was so little concern for pretense or etiquette now, we were desperate for each other. Even though Alex had already taken my virginity, this was the first time that I felt myself fully giving myself to him. I wanted to be consumed by his desire. There was something about us stating our intentions to one another at dinner that had immediately changed our dynamic, morphing it into a relationship that did not fit into a single category.
I didn’t know if his hands were shaking as badly as mine were, but I was making slow progress on the buttons of his shirt. A metallic snap at the back of my dress where his hands had been fumbling made us pause for only a moment. He’d broken the zipper of my new dress but the only annoyance I felt was at the delay this caused in getting my skin flush to his.
A short, rumbling laugh escaped Alex’s chest before he swooped down to knock my legs out from under me and carry me over to the bed. He set me down on the bed, not as gently as he had the previous night, and flipped me over to my stomach. What little breath I had rushed out of my lungs along with a startled, high-pitched gasp. I felt Alex’s breath brush along the nape of my neck as he lowered his mouth to my ear, the barest atom away from touching me.
"I want you so badly," he whispered.
I arched my back, instinctively raising my hips to him. He groaned and grasped me by my hips, jerking them up in a swift motion that had me on my knees with my head buried in my arms. Alex reached under my dress and pulled down the new silky underwear I had put on for him. He ran his hands across my ass and groaned as I lifted my hips higher, desperate for him to enter me. He slid two fingers inside me and I groaned. I matched the rhythm of his fingers until his thumb found my clit and then I lost all track of what I was doing. I came on his hand but didn’t let up the pace. I needed more of him – I needed all of him.
I cried out when he stopped touching me to unbuckle his jeans. He thrust himself inside me and I groaned as he stretched and filled me. As his pace picked up, hard and fast, I reached back to touch one of his hands holding my hips.
He pulled me harder into him, moaning my name. After two more thrusts I felt his cock become even harder as he came inside me.
We fell onto the bed, our limbs entangled, sweaty and exhausted. He began to stroke my hair and I think I fell asleep. I woke up to Alex tracing those circles that had already become my favorite touch on my stomach while staring out the window at the sparkling city lights.
"Hi," I said.
"Hey there, beautiful." He turned to me with a contented smile.
"Sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep."
"Sorry that I broke your dress."
"Hush, no apologies," I said, copying his phrase.
"Can I say that I’m very much looking forward to having more moments like this with you?" he asked.
I arched an eyebrow at him and grinned. "So it’s true, you only want me for my body."
He looked horrified. "No! That’s not what I meant."
"So, you don’t like having sex with me?" I teased.
"I want to have every kind of moment with you, Casey. Moments when we’re dressed, moments when we’re naked, moments when we are out in town, moments when we are at my house. I want to spend my life with you."
My eyes widened. This was more than I expected, but I found he was echoing the feelings of my heart. "You can say it, but only if I can say it too."
"Let’s do that, then," he said.
We looked out the window together, at all the busy movements against the leisurely last moments of the setting sun. I was happy, he was happy and I knew we would be happy together, despite, or perhaps because of how we met.
Other books by Kate Stone
Addicted to You
Love for the Single Dad
About the Author
Kate Stone has always lived for romance. From the time she was very small, waiting for her Prince Charming to come and take her away, she has looked for the healing, redeeming power of love.
She lives in New England with her long-suffering husband and their four children. She spends her days as a graduate student and her weekends writing.
You can visit her at www.AuthorKateStone.com or on twitter @KateStoneAuthor
Finally, if you liked this story, leave a review letting her know what you liked and she’ll write more.