by Hazel Parker
He reached the door. I took a breath. I told myself to remain calm. And then it swung open.
He looked as nervous as I had ever seen him. Even on our first date, Nick didn’t look as uncertain as he did when he walked into my apartment just now. I tried to tell myself that I was just as uncertain as he was, but I had to admit, the sight of him had an effect on me that pushed me a certain direction.
“Hey,” he said as he took off his shoes and sat on the couch.
“How are you?” I said with a soft smile.
“I’m good,” he said. “Good. Is, uh, Ryan around?”
“No, he’s with my parents right now, I just wanted to talk to you alone.”
Nick bit his lip, perhaps trying to avoid getting ahead of himself. I had to remind myself of the same. We needed to have a productive conversation as adults before anything, and I mean anything, else happened.
“So listen,” I said, sitting up and crossing one leg over the other. “I felt like things ended rather dramatically the last time we hung out. I was just so taken aback by the news about Malcolm that I couldn’t think straight. And so…I just want to hear your side of things. I accused you of a lot, and I want to know how you saw them. But please just promise me you’ll tell me as much as you can.”
Nick nodded, folded his hands, and drew a deep breath in through his nostrils.
“There’s a lot to my family that I have only just begun to learn, and I can say that much of what I wanted to believe was just lies or people besmirching us is, well, likely true,” he said. “And there’s some that even I don’t know about. So if it sounds like I’m playing coy with you, it’s not that. It’s just that there are some things I genuinely do not know or understand.
“But anyway…after Malcolm sent you to the hospital, I was in a world of rage. I…wanted to kill him myself, and that’s not an exaggeration. Had I seen him on the streets right after, I would have beaten him to a bloody fucking pulp and gone to jail myself. I didn’t care. I just needed to see that asshole gone. But I knew that that wasn’t feasible for many reasons.”
It was a moot point since Malcolm was dead, but there was a certain positive feeling that came from hearing that. I didn’t know if “happiness” was right, I couldn’t quite say I was happy Nick was willing to kill on my behalf, but I certainly felt as protected and secure as I ever had in my life. It was a point in his favor, for sure.
“So I made a call,” he said. “But I really felt like I was chasing an imaginary dog. Like, I made those calls out of desperation, not certainty. And, of course, whoever I spoke to were vague and didn’t say what they would do. When I hung up, I felt like something would happen, but I still figured I was just acting out of rage. I thought someone would get someone to beat Malcolm’s ass in jail, and that would be the end of that. I didn’t fucking know murder was going to happen.”
“Shh,” I said, sensing him losing control. I almost—almost—touched his hand to reassure him, but I had to withhold for the moment. Once we crossed that boundary, there was no going back.
“When I saw it on the news, the reaction you saw was not ‘oh I need to lie’ or ‘oh it happened like I thought it would but not while Izzy’s here.’ It was ‘what the fuck?’ Like in baseball, sometimes a manager will tell a pitcher to send a message by delivering a fastball near someone’s head. You don’t actually hit them, but the point gets made. Well, in this case, the guy just got drilled square in the head. And it killed him.”
Nick sighed.
“I’m sorry this whole situation has gotten to where it has. I don’t want you to feel like you’re dating someone with deep roots in organized crime. Because I’m not. I swear to you, Izzy, I am not playing baseball by day and night and then ordering people to off their enemies late into the evening. The Ferrari winery is real—”
“I know,” I said with a gentle smile, holding up my glass.
That probably wasn’t going to help keep the conversation neutral and even keeled, but it wasn’t like I wasn’t already leaning a certain way.
“Oh, nice. And, yeah. All of my siblings and I lead legitimate, normal lives. Well, except Leo, he’s sort of the oddball out. But the point is, I would never put you in danger. And God help me, Izzy, if things didn’t work out, I wouldn’t ever want you to feel like I’m a different version of Malcolm. It would suck, and it would hurt so bad, but I would just leave you be. I think you suffered enough after that TMZ shit.”
I looked down at my wine glass, processing everything Nick had just said.
What did my gut say?
He was genuine.
He was real.
He was perhaps hiding who he had called, but that didn’t matter, not in the grand scheme of things.
What mattered was Malcolm was gone, I felt safe with Nick, and I felt like I could start to go back to the way things were. And let’s just say that the way things were was pretty damn fun.
“You just have to understand,” I said as I took a sip of wine. “Imagine from my perspective that I meet this wonderful, great guy. He treats me well, is handsome, takes care of himself and his loved ones, doesn’t mind my past or my kid. But because of everything that had happened with my ex, I’m still on edge. And then my ex comes back and hurts me. But the guy says he’ll do whatever he can to help me and still treats me well. And then I find out my ex gets murdered, and the immediate reaction you have is one of guilt.”
I took another, longer sip of my wine.
“For the last several years, my life has been about survival and paranoia. That’s not something that you just snap your fingers and move past. You analyze every relationship through that lens. That’s why, after what happened at your family’s dinner, I had to get space. I had to make sure that I could see things clearly.”
“And do you?”
I had to smile. I was trying to stay as calm as I could, but damnit, my expression gave away my answer.
“I think that your family has a past that would worry a lot of people. And I’m not going to pretend that I don’t wonder what it could mean if someone in the family doesn’t like me. But I know that I’m not one to judge someone based on their past. I do my best to judge someone based on who they are now, how they treat me now, and how they comport themselves now. And honestly, Nick? You check all three.”
I swore it was like seeing him break a slump that lasted a hundred at bats. He didn’t even try to hide or limit the extent of his smile.
“Before you get carried away,” I said. “I just need you to promise me some things.”
“Hmm?”
“I need you to promise that you will keep me informed of what you know about your family,” I said. “As much as you can. I don’t expect you to tell me secrets your grandparents confide in you, but I don’t want to be blindsided if something comes up with your family. I need you to promise me that no matter what happens, you will never do anything to me or my family. Even if things go south, I need that knowledge of safety. And I need to know that if we go back to being a couple, you’ll make sure I get in better photos for TMZ.”
Even I was laughing by the time I made my last “request.” My requests were genuine, but the place I’d said them from was much lighter than before.
And the craziest part was, this wasn’t even because of anything Nick had said. I knew I would wind up here the second that he walked into my apartment. Call it gut instinct, hope, subconscious thinking, whatever—Nick’s presence had told me what I needed to know. The words just confirmed it.
“I promise to keep you as informed as I can,” he said. “I promise you that even if we break up in horrible, dramatic fashion, you’re someone I will always have affection and care for, so I would never do anything to you or your family. And how about I just promise never to let you appear on TMZ?”
“Let’s not get carried away here; we have to be realistic somewhat,” I said.
And now, as we laughed, I put my hand on his. I could feel the hairs on his arm stick up from the goos
ebumps. I had them too.
“Is there anything you need from me, Nick?”
He looked down at my hand, then looked up at me.
“Just that you understand that while some in my family may be quick to judge and misunderstand you, I will always do my best to understand and cherish you,” he said. “And I will always…”
My eyes went wide. I had a feeling of what he was about to say. But rather than say that word, his eyes locked on me, and our faces almost magnetically began to come together. It took only a mere moment for us to lock lips, and just like that, our week-long break had ended with the most passionate of kisses we’d had to that point.
And from that passionate kissing, it only took another few moments for Nick to display incredible strength by scooping me up off the couch and into his arms.
“Wow!” I said. “Didn’t know baseball players had that kind of strength.”
“Oh, you haven’t seen anything yet.”
I immediately went from having my arousal steadily grow to it spiking on the spot. This was the Nick Ferrari that I had fallen for. This was the Nick Ferrari that I needed in my life, in my apartment, in my bedroom.
Finally, this was the Nick Ferrari that I had.
Our clothes practically got ripped off within moments of us getting into the room. I was down to my bra and jeans before we even hit the bed, and Nick had just his shirt and boxers on. He mounted me in the bed and unclasped my bra, getting to my breasts with his mouth and hands immediately. I arched my hips into him, horny as hell. I reached up and grabbed his shirt, very nearly tearing it off entirely, and then rolled him on his back so I could get to his boxers.
I reached under them and stroked his stiff cock. But even that wasn’t enough. It felt good in my hands. It would feel even better inside of me.
And this time, there was going to be no waiting, no delay to put anything else on. I stood up over him, got my jeans and underwear off, and rode up on his hips, grinding his bare cock against my clit.
“I want you inside me so fucking bad,” I growled.
“So put me inside.”
Oh, fuck yes. If Nick didn’t care, if Nick wanted to be in there without a condom, I sure didn’t care. I trusted him, and he trusted me.
I slid him inside.
Oh, fuck, how much better that felt with him raw than not. The feeling of him filling me like so…oh my God. It was like the difference between getting a massage with a bedsheet over your body and one without. It wasn’t even comparable.
“Oh, yes, Nick,” I said.
“Fuck yes,” he said. “God, you feel fucking incredible.”
I let my hair hang as I leaned forward to kiss him, all the while my hips starting to grind and move against his thickness. Between the kiss, his hands on my breasts, and the naked cock inside of me, this was the definition of pure bliss and pure ecstasy. He felt much fuller than before, like he could reach a level of hardness that he could not have with a condom on.
We made love on my bed for what felt like a blissful eternity of sexual oasis. I came twice, the first orgasm when I dug my hands into his chest and rode him right to climax. I could feel my juices just enveloping him with pleasure, and of course, it only lubricated him even more, making the next orgasm—which came with him on top—feel that much more potent.
The second just so happened to come moments before his own, when he was on top of me. His cock had swelled to enormous proportions, such so that it was as clear a sign as any that he was on the verge of orgasm. I hadn’t taken birth control in some time because I just wasn’t dating enough to, but I didn’t care—I trusted Nick. I knew on a level that went deeper than logic and words that if something happened, not only would Nick do his part, he’d do it so well that the kid would have the best life possible. Nick was already going to be an amazing father figure to Ryan—what was it to have one more kid?
“Oh, fuck, I’m so close,” Nick said, which naturally pushed me closer to my second orgasm.
“Yes, yes, yes,” I got out in a fit of pleasured cries.
My orgasm washed over me, causing my body to convulse and quiver with pleasure, just moments before Nick came. The feeling of his warmth shooting deeper into me, and his cock quivering, were like the perfect combination. I had never had a moment of such bliss and of such pleasure before; nothing could match this moment. It was the utopia of my life, the euphoric moment that defined our relationship.
And though we did eventually come down and finish, panting, just because the moment had passed didn’t mean either of us would forget this anytime soon. It was just one of those moments that, the instant it happened, I knew would remain forever ingrained in my mind. It would lodge itself there, be an accessible memory I could reflect on whenever I was feeling down. It was the perfect memory from the perfect man.
Nick, exhausted and finished, pulled out with a groan. He leaned forward and kissed me gently. I cupped his face tenderly.
“Nick,” I said. “Right before this started. This naked fun started. You said you would always something. What do you always?”
He gave a short laugh. I already knew. I just wanted the spine-tingling sensation that came from hearing it said out loud.
“Maybe it’s crazy to say, but I love you.”
Yes. That’s it.
“It’s not crazy, Nick,” I said. “No one has ever treated me like you have. No one has ever cared for me like you have. It’s not crazy. Because I love you too.”
He wrapped his other arm around me and pulled me in for another kiss. This kiss was not as expressive, but it was one of the longest-lasting ones I’d ever had.
Just as, I suspected, our love would be—the longest-lasting I’d ever have.
Forever.
Epilogue
Three Months Later
It was a rare day off for me during the baseball season, but it was one that I was destined not to waste.
With it being a beautiful, warm summer day in the Bay Area, I had Izzy by my side, with Ryan in her arms. We stood on the bow of the family yacht, overlooking the Pacific Ocean. I had my arm around her, and she around me. Behind us, the Ferrari family shared drinks, laughs, and the occasional gentle look out into the ocean.
Not everyone in my family had quite come around to the idea of me dating a single mother. My grandmother still occasionally remarked that it would be better if I had children of my own, but my grandfather had started to shush her. My father had not yet completely let go of the “order” I had made, but we were now able to carry on conversations that did not revolve around that particular point.
But for the most part, Izzy and I felt completely at ease around each other and bringing Ryan around. Ryan even started saying “Aunt Layla,” which delighted my sister. Brett was not so lucky. Leo, sadly but predictably, wasn’t around enough to get a nickname.
“Yo, All-Star.”
Speaking of the unlucky.
“Get your ass up here for a sec?”
I turned to Izzy.
“You’ll be fine here for a bit, won’t ya?”
“Let me think,” she said with a smirk. “I’ve got my kid. I’ve got my drink. And I’ve got my love. Yeah, I think I’ll be fine.”
“OK, let me go see what player up there wants, I’ll be back, love you,” I said with a kiss.
“Love you too.”
I bounded up the stairs of the yacht to see Brett having a drink, overlooking all of the Ferrari family.
“I’m glad you could stop making out for five seconds to come and talk.”
“Oh, shut it; don’t be jealous just because the guy who least needs the inheritance is also the first to find true love.”
I expected Brett to come back with some sort of taunt, but to my surprise, Brett actually sighed, almost sounding defeated, like he had hit a wall with this issue.
“You know, truth be told, after your little fiasco with Dad, I half-expected you to be written out of the will,” he said.
“The rumors of my demise w
ere that exaggerated, huh?”
“Wouldn’t call it exaggerated.”
Shit, it’s like I learn every day just how dark and bad this family’s past was.
“But in any case, one thing it did result in was the grandparents and parents harping on us single kids to start finding a serious partner. And goddamnit, Nick, I am so fucking over it that I feel like I’m about to go back under it. Or something.”
“How so?”
Brett took a long gulp of his drink.
“Well, let’s talk real for a second,” he said. “You have the fame, but I have the looks, which means I get the best of both worlds. I get to fuck whoever I want, how often I want, and I don’t have to deal with TMZ following me around. But, on the other hand, let’s not pretend that this family inheritance isn’t a shitload of money. I may be greedy for saying this, but I’m not going to pass up a chance to get in on that. And with all respect, I am not gonna be a gold-digger to you.”
“Hah, well, I’m happy to help, but yes, Izzy can be the only person who digs for my gold.”
Brett arched an eyebrow at me.
“That sounds…”
“Yeah, we’ll leave it at that,” I said with a guilty chuckle. “But for real, though, are you worried about the inheritance deal?”
“Honestly? Yes.”
I empathized with Brett. I had the sports contracts to ensure that even if I had come from rags, I would have all the riches I ever needed in my lifetime. And while Brett wasn’t exactly making minimum wage at the winery, he also wasn’t living the baller life that the Ferrari fortune would someday promise—if, and only if, he had a wife and family.
I had always joked with him about one idea in particular that seemed ridiculous at the time, but now that it was here…
“Why don’t you just pay someone off to marry you?”