by Alexa Donne
“Um, yes, I was very tired,” he said, forced to engage in actual conversation. Evgenia nodded enthusiastically.
“Well, you almost got into a fistfight, so I can only imagine.”
“It was a mistake,” he mumbled. His eyes darted up to mine. I nearly choked on my tea. He looked away.
“I’m sure Leo doesn’t see it that way.”
Maybe I should have told Evgenia about our fight. Elliot merely raised an eyebrow and let the subject drop.
“Where are Max and Ewan?” I asked, looking to fill the void with safe small talk.
“Oh, they’re off-ship. On a cargo run that came up and paid too well to pass on,” Evgenia said breezily. “Should be back tomorrow.”
My wrist tab pinged with a message from my aunt. Background checks on all guests cleared, it said. I must have blanched, because Elliot asked if everything was okay. I met his gaze, finding worry there, which I promptly torpedoed.
“My aunt says you all passed your background checks,” I said, not even thinking to lie.
“Don’t look so surprised,” Elliot said, a decided chill descending.
“I’m not surprised,” I said, even though I kind of was. But I didn’t appreciate his assumption regarding my assumptions. “I think it’s great. Now my aunt will leave you alone. She’s been on the rampage about those protesters, and I don’t want any of you to be inconvenienced.”
“We had nothing to do with that,” he snapped.
“I didn’t say you did.”
“Lighten up, El,” Evgenia jumped in. “Captain Lind made her do it. It wasn’t a value judgment.”
While Elliot didn’t look convinced, he let it drop. I disappeared back into my toast, Elliot into his eggs, and Evgenia into mounting consternation at the both of us. Then their wrist tabs went off simultaneously. Mine remained silent.
“‘Meet me on the bridge if you want to have fun tonight. Twenty hundred hours,’” Evgenia read aloud. “It’s from Klara. Any clue what it might be, Leo?”
“My guess is that it’s spacewalking,” I said. It was usually her go-to to impress guests, and now that she had her focus on Elliot, of course this was her plan.
“Do you mean what I think you mean? Literally walking . . . out in space?” Evgenia’s eyes went wide.
“Yep. They have special spacesuits tethered to the ship. Technically they’re for maintenance, but since Klara’s mom is captain, we get a special exception.”
“Ooh, then we have to go!” Evgenia looked right at me as she said it.
“I wasn’t invited,” I said in my smallest voice.
“Who cares? You’re going with us.” When she pointed at Elliot on the “us,” he groaned.
“I’d give my right arm for a night in.”
Him and me both. It was another reminder of how similar we were.
“Nope.” Evgenia shook her head emphatically. “You’re going. Because I want to go for a space walk, and I want to do so with my friends. Both of you.”
Evgenia ordered, and we followed.
“Fine, fine,” Elliot acquiesced. I nodded my agreement as well. Evgenia was already proving adept at wing-womaning.
Now I had approximately ten hours to figure out exactly how I felt about the whole thing.
* * *
The afternoon nap I indulged in didn’t help clear my head any. I awoke groggy and conflicted.
I’d pored over every interaction I’d had with Elliot in the last forty-eight hours. I wanted to believe that his overtures were sincere, but I just couldn’t reconcile the part where he said yes to my sister at speed dating. It was too cruel, to both her and me, if he wasn’t interested.
And my sister was so eager to be fallen in love with. Evgenia was right. I needed to nudge her in the direction of someone, anyone, else. Regardless of my feelings for Elliot, she was sparring with Klara now, who played dirty, and she was going to get hurt.
Carina made it easy. We finished getting ready for the space walk with ten minutes to spare, and she flopped down onto the couch with a dramatic sigh.
“Leo, do you think he likes me? Do you think he likes Klara? Do you think compatibility scores really matter? Because Klara told me theirs last night and it’s way higher than his and mine, and what if he cares about that sort of thing?”
“Hold on, slow down,” I said, my head spinning. I sat down next to her. “What do you mean, compatibility scores?”
Carina dragged her head up to look at me. “In the Valg app. Have you not used it at all?” She grabbed her tab from the coffee table and pulled up the app. “When you say yes to someone, it shows you your compatibility rating.” Carina tapped into her matches and handed the tab over to me to look.
She had twenty-two matches, with compatibility scores ranging from thirty-eight percent to ninety-two. Carina’s compatibility with Elliot was sixty-four percent.
“What’s his score match with Klara?” I asked as nonchalantly as I could manage. Inside, I burned with the fear that it would be an impossibly high number.
“Seventy-two.” Carina pouted. “Much higher than mine.”
“But not that high.” I let out a sigh of relief. “What about this guy you have a ninety-two-percent match with?” I checked the name. “Paul from the Versailles.”
“He’s five foot four.” Carina wrinkled her nose. “I said yes before seeing him in person. Does that make me shallow?”
“A little bit,” I conceded.
“What about you? Have you really not said yes to anyone? Does Daddy know?”
I rolled my eyes. “I don’t care what he thinks. He knows I hate this whole thing.”
“Still. Where’s your tab? You should say yes to someone. At least try.”
I decided on an experiment. “I’ll log in to the app, and I’ll say yes to some people. But only if you promise to give a few of your eighty-percent-and-up matches a shot.”
“You do think Elliot prefers Klara, then!”
“No, I most definitely do not,” I said quite honestly. “It’s just a good idea to broaden your options. Plus, you’re only sixteen. You don’t have to match with anyone this Valg. There will be another one.”
“When I’m twenty-one! I’m not waiting that long.”
It took me a minute to grab my tab from our room and open the Valg app.
“Fine, then let’s make a deal. I will try if you do.” I pulled up the match index. All the ones from speed dating were switched to no. All it would take was a swipe to undo any of them. My finger hovered over Elliot’s name. What was our compatibility rating?
“Let’s switch.” Carina didn’t give me time to protest before swapping our tabs. “You pick out two guys for me—not the short one, please—and I’ll pick out some for you.”
“Not Lukas!” I screeched. I imagined him getting a notification that I’d changed my mind about him. Really, I didn’t want anyone to get that ping. I couldn’t believe I was doing this.
“Don’t worry, I’m a good sister,” Carina said, tapping her finger several times on the screen. Her eyes widened. “Oh, wow, you’ve got a ninety-three percent with this one,” she said.
“Who?”
“Daniel Turan. And Theo is eighty-four percent. Higher than I thought he would be.”
“Carina, no, you did not make Theo Madsen a yes for me!”
She shrugged. “I was curious about your rating. I picked a few other random ones who looked cute, but the scores are really low.” I wrested the tab back from her and scanned the results. I didn’t recognize most of the ones she’d picked, and she was right. Most of them were under fifty percent. Elliot was still a no. My finger itched, but I resisted.
A knock sounded at the door, and there he was in front of me, next to Evgenia. I seemed to have interrupted a tense conversation between them, almost an argument—about me? They cut themselves off as soon as I flung open the door. Without thinking, my hands flew to my torso, smoothing down the bodice of my dress. Elliot’s eyes seemed to pass through me,
anyway.
Carina burst through the door, angling past me.
“Evy! El!” She hugged each of them in turn, as if after a long separation and not a mere twenty-four hours. Less than, in fact. Evgenia cast me a look as Carina held Elliot for a beat longer than was strictly friendly, and I tried to appear contrite. I’d tried, but apparently Carina wasn’t giving up on Elliot just yet. She monopolized his attentions all the way up to the top deck, asking him questions about his travels and whiskey, and responding to everything he said with “That’s so interesting!”
Distracted by them, I almost forgot I wasn’t actually invited to the evening’s activities, but my cousin’s face was a quick reminder as she greeted us.
“Leo . . . hi?” I offered a tepid wave. She didn’t say anything else or turn me away, instead ushering us all inside to the bridge. We found her mother at the console. The ship mostly ran itself, so I knew she wasn’t piloting us, and the silence told me the captain wasn’t fielding communication from other ships. Freja looked up, blinking at us in confusion.
“Klara? What is the meaning of this? You know I use Sunday evenings to catch up on paperwork.”
“We’d like to go for a space walk.” From Klara, it was a statement, not a question.
“When I said I wanted you to take an interest in the ship, this isn’t what I had in mind,” Captain Lind said, rising from her chair and removing her spectacles. But she also didn’t say no. “I’m surprised to see you here, Leonie.”
I was the resident wuss, called out. Or maybe Klara had told her mother how strained things were between us. The captain eyed our large party. “Only two of you can go out at a time.”
Finally, I did the math. Klara, Evgenia, Elliot, Carina . . . and me. Five. That’s why Klara hadn’t invited me. I was the fifth wheel.
“Thank you, Mummy,” Klara said, seemingly oblivious.
“Language,” Captain Lind scolded. She could serve terms of endearment like a pro but didn’t like Klara being so informal with her in public.
Freja returned to the console, tapping and swiping for a minute. “All right, I’ve given Leonie temporary bio-scan access to the maintenance airlock and storage room. It will expire at midnight.”
“Leo?” Klara parroted back, incredulous. “Why would you give her access? I’m your apprentice.”
“Because you’re always swanning off, indulging your fancy, and Leonie is unfailingly reliable.”
Klara glared but did not protest further. Captain Lind was not a woman with whom you argued. We left the bridge and walked the short distance to our destination, Klara fuming all the way. The captain had now made me essential to the evening’s activities. Bully for me.
“The suits are in here.” Klara grabbed Elliot by the hand and pulled him to the storage room, stopping at the bio-lock and waiting for me to open it. I found myself so close to the two of them that I could smell Klara’s perfume, so sweet it tickled my nose hairs. Underneath was Elliot, the new musky scent fast becoming familiar to me. I took a deep inhale. Hastily, I mashed my fingers against the bio-lock.
Dunk-dunk.
Attempt failed. Klara huffed noisily, and my eyes flicked over to catch Elliot’s reaction. He dug his incisor into his bottom lip, eyes laser-focused at the door. Avoiding my gaze. I thought about kissing him, how long it had been. I wiped my sweaty hand against my dress and tried again. This time, the door whooshed open.
We all filed inside, availing ourselves of a bench that ran along the far wall.
“Guests first,” Klara said, standing before us like a drill sergeant with her brigade. “Evgenia and Carina, I insist you go.”
The way Carina’s face fell, opportunity lost to go out with Elliot, made my heart ache a little. Yet I felt the slightest swell of happiness for my own agenda, then promptly became filled with self-loathing. Carina dutifully rose and started climbing into one of the twin spacesuits.
“Leo, help me, would you?” Evgenia called me over to her side, then pulled me close as I held her arms so she could step in.
“So Elliot will go out with Klara, obviously, but that’s your window,” Evgenia husked into my ear. “Ask him to go again, with you, for your turn.”
“Oh, no, I couldn’t—”
“Yes”—Evgenia cut me off, then turned so I could zip her up—“you can.”
“Carina, you want zipper help, too?” I asked, to which she halfheartedly nodded. I followed her eyeline to Elliot and Klara having a lively chat in the corner. Oh, boy.
After I’d zipped her up, I gave her shoulder a squeeze, though I wasn’t sure she could feel it through the layers of insulation. And, feeling a misplaced sense of obligation for the future heartbreak I would be dealing her once I told her the full truth, I hefted her helmet underneath one arm, as if playing valet. In that spirit, plus as the so-called keeper of the keys, I escorted the fully suited-up ladies to the maintenance airlock, a sharp right turn and ten-foot walk from the storage room. Hands dry this time, my fingers unlocked the door on the first try.
“I’ll tether you in, since I’ve done this before,” I explained as we entered the forward airlock, where the controls were. Evgenia and Carina moved past a bulkhead, which would soon separate us, to the outer door, beyond which lay wide-open space.
“Here.” I handed Carina her helmet and moved to either side, unhooking a springy tether wire, which I wound through loops at their waists and then pressure-sealed into a twist opening on each of their backs.
“You’re sure this is safe?” Carina asked nervously, in a strange reversal of position. Usually I was the worrywart, second-guessing the safety and prudence of a situation. But I’d done this enough times to speak with confidence.
“The maintenance crews do this all the time. You’ll be tethered to the ship, and I can pull you back if you get scared.”
“I’m not scared,” she bristled. There was the little sister I knew.
“How long do we get out there?” Evgenia jumped in, voice thrumming with excitement. She bounced up and down as best she could in her heavy suit.
There were no set rules, so it seemed it was up to me. “Ten minutes?”
It seemed like enough time for a thrill but not so much that Klara and Elliot, the next pair to go, would have extra time to bond. Was that terrible? I put it out of my mind.
“Yes, ten minutes,” I repeated, surer this time.
I snapped a small can of compressed air into their suits, then showed them where the release buttons were located on either arm to use it.
“Use this to direct yourselves, but use it conservatively. Small can, and all that.”
They both nodded, and with that, I retreated behind the separating bulkhead, depressing a button to shuttle a quadruple-paned glass partition that would keep me safe from space’s harsh clime while they were outside.
I counted them down from ten while I fiddled with the control panel, which, like the door, was keyed to my bio-signature. So I’d definitely have to oversee Klara and Elliot’s turn, too. I released the outer doors.
The girls didn’t actually need me to keep watch—it was a fully automated system, and they could pull themselves back anytime, should they wish. But watch them I did, for a solid three minutes before they drifted from view. With the press of a button on the control console, I could hear them, too, but I listened for only a minute. Just enough time to hear their twin squeals of delight and Evgenia dare Carina to do a backflip.
Then I allowed myself to drift into fantasy, imagining myself asking Elliot to accompany me on my turn. He’d say yes, mouth turning up into the slightest smile, setting off the dimples I loved so much. Klara would fume, but I wouldn’t care. I’d be floating long before we left the airlock. He’d take my hand, never leaving my side as we cartwheeled, weightless among the stars.
Ahem.
A loud cough behind me broke me from my reverie. I flipped around to find Klara and Elliot standing in the door frame.
“Are they done yet?” Klara asked tes
tily.
I checked the automatic timer I’d set. They had three minutes left. The look on Klara’s face told me that, regardless, their time was up. Oh, well. I pressed the communication button, opening up the channel so they could hear me.
“Sorry, I have to pull you back now,” I said, manually overriding the system. I took care to leave the communication channel open and on speaker so Klara would hear Evgenia and Carina’s sullen protests.
Once they were back and the airlock doors closed, I released the glass safety partition separating us. No sooner had the girls started zipping out of their suits than Klara was dragging Elliot by the hand over to them, and they went ahead and got into the suits right there. I noticed Evgenia sway on her feet. Lightning-fast, Elliot offered his arm to steady her; then I saw him pull close to whisper something in her ear, which only made Evgenia look queasier. I performed the same ritual as before, tethering and snapping them in, instructing Elliot on the compressed air, then moving behind the partition and back to the control panel.
“Leo, give us fifteen minutes,” Klara said breezily, helmet under her arm, looking more glamorous in a spacesuit than was fair. “We want to really take it all in.”
Carina let out the faintest chirp of outrage but held her tongue, so far as calling Klara out on the inequity. I also knew better than to argue with her, so I dutifully programmed fifteen minutes into the system as Carina and Evgenia fell back behind me. Evgenia was resting against the wall, looking a bit flushed.
My eyes remained glued to the console as I keyed in the final commands to close the safety partition and open the airlock. My complete focus was required if I wanted to avoid the way Klara and Elliot were linking arms as the doors shuttled open.
Nope, I did not see that at all.
“All right, how are we going to kill fifteen minutes?” I asked, spinning around to face the girls.
And then Evgenia fainted.
Thirteen
“Evgenia!”
I rushed to catch her before she cracked her head on the floor, my heart practically jumping into my throat as I realized I was too far away. It happened both faster than a blink and as if the world had switched to slow motion. Thankfully Carina reacted to my reaction, grabbing Evgenia by the arm just in time.