“I have to go.” I stood up and spun crazily around, taking in my packed bags on the floor and the groceries that were still strewn all over the table and countertop.
“I called Aunt Genie for you. Patty is covering your shift. Go on, sit back down,” Gracie said calmly as she opened the oven to shove in a tray of pizza rolls. Ooh, that looked good. My stomach growled as the scent started to fill the space. My eyes burned with hot tears as I remembered Everett’s reactions to my growly stomach. I ran a fingertip underneath my eyes to catch the tears and turned away from Gracie so she wouldn’t see.
“You did? Thank you,” I murmured through the lump in my throat.
“I did. You’re a mess, Willa. You can’t go to work like this. And for the record, I heard everything you said to him.” She held up an empty glass. “I listened at the door.” No shame, this one. I chuckled despite myself.
“That actually works?” She nodded with a grin, then opened the pantry to continue putting the nonperishables away, tidying the kitchen as she went.
“Yep. Flawless. You didn’t have to break up with him though. That was dumb.” She tossed over her shoulder.
“It was the right thing to do,” I argued as I sat in a chair at the tiny kitchen table to watch her gather plates and napkins for our late dinner.
“Oh yeah, sure it was. Incredibly hot, ripped AF, fine as hell man wants to protect you from your ex. He begs you to stay with him and practically cries over you to your face, and you dump him. You’re a literal freaking genius, Willa. But your legendary IQ is wasted on you, just like Momma always says.” She turned to me; face scrunched up in apology. “I’m sorry, that was mean. I went too far. Clara is paying for a therapist for me. I’m working on my ‘anger issues.’” She added air quotes when she said anger issues, and I smiled at her.
“It’s okay, don’t worry about it. Momma is right about me. I make terrible choices. I have screwed my life up in every way that exists,” I admitted.
“Haven’t we all?” she said with a sardonic wisdom that a sixteen-year-old girl should not be capable of.
“We’ll be okay, somehow,” I told her, even though I didn’t believe it.
“Sure. We’re gonna be just fine.” Sarcasm dripped from her tone as she slid the plates on the table and popped open a root beer. She took a sip and sat across from me. “Want one? I also put wine into the cart. It’s the pink kind. The bottle was pretty.”
I chuckled. “No thanks on the wine. Wine and melancholy do not pair well with me. I’ll get a root beer too.” I stood up and headed to the fridge. I snagged a root beer and opened the freezer for the ice cream. A root beer float sounded good. Eating my feelings sounded even better.
“Good idea. Give me a scoop too.” Gracie smiled at me from the table.
“Sure thing. Let’s get food-wasted and watch a movie,” I suggested.
“Just like real sisters,” she murmured with a sad smile.
“Come here.” I set my root beer down on the counter and opened my arms. She stood up, tears filling her eyes as she stepped into my hug. I pulled her head to my shoulder. “I love you Gracie, and I’m so sorry I left you,” I whispered. Her shoulders shook against me as I held her. “I’m staying here in Green Valley, with you. No matter what happens. I will never leave again.”
“Okay,” she hiccupped. “I want you to stay. I missed you so much.”
“I missed you too. I…I wish I knew what I was thinking all the years I was gone. But I still don’t understand it,” I confessed.
She pulled away and I wiped her tears with the hem of Everett’s huge shirt. “We don’t have the best perspective on things. Clara said it’s because of Momma always being so mean and angry and Daddy leaving us. She wanted me to live with her, but my friends are all in Green Valley, so I said no.”
“What about Sadie?” I asked.
“No way. Her husband is a dick. But he’s gone now, and she’s stuck with Momma until her job starts. I’ll miss Flynn and Rider, but I don’t want to stay there anymore.” She shrugged like it was all the same to her. Sadness washed over me, while memories of my childhood stabbed me in the heart. “Do you ever want kids, Willa?” I stiffened, unsure of what to say. How much did she need to know? The timer on the oven went off and she laughed. “Time to get food-wasted,” she announced with a huge smile. I smiled back, my heart only halfway in it. I scooped ice cream into glasses, she plated the pizza rolls, and we headed for the couch to deposit our goodies onto the coffee table.
I found the remote tucked into the cushion next to my hip and turned the TV on. “Everett gave me his Netflix password,” I said, offhand.
Nudging my shoulder with hers, she squealed, “Oh my god, Willa! Sharing a Netflix password is the new pre-engagement, everyone knows that.” She giggled as she poured root beer over her ice cream and inserted a straw. I peered at her out of the corner of my eye, shaking my head.
“You’re a bag full of nuts, Gracie,” I said with an involuntary smile. My life no longer felt like a hopeless void, and I had her to thank for it. She made me feel like I had something to live for, because she needed me. “I love you, kid,” I stated.
“I love you, too.” She beamed at me. We watched The Lego Movie, pigged out on pizza rolls and root beer floats, and I allowed myself to relax into this moment with my little sister.
I shoved everything else out of my mind. I lost the panic, the heartbreak, and the angst that had dominated my life for so long and let my soul sigh. I was determined to get better, to do better, and for once I had hope that I could really do it.
I awoke early—and not early afternoon, like I usually woke up—to sunlight streaming through my windows and Gracie sprawled next to me like a starfish. Her arm rested over my neck and her leg was over mine. We were both six feet tall, and the two of us in a double bed was crazy. Still, I wouldn’t make her move for the world. I grinned and got out of bed. Loss hit me when I realized I would not be going upstairs to join Everett for coffee and Daisy’s doughnuts. I had taken that ritual for granted. I’d had months of coffee and doughnuts with Everett. Months of him taking care of me without me even realizing he was doing it until it was much too late. I heaved out a sigh and made my way to the kitchen, hoping Gracie had tossed some coffee into the cart last night.
Searching through the cabinets I unearthed a bag of coffee and a box of muffins. It was a poor substitution for Everett’s, but it would have to do. While the coffee brewed in the pot, I found my phone and sent a text to Sabrina asking her to meet me for lunch. I had to work tonight, and I wanted to talk to her before she grew too upset over my attempted run away yesterday. Wyatt was sure to have told her, and I wanted to explain myself. I also wanted to make sure she didn’t hate me.
Bang. Boom. Crash.
I choked back a sob as I recognized the sounds of Everett working outside. There would be no dash to the window to watch him this time. Because I had been right. Goodness like him was not meant for the likes of me. I poured a cup of sad coffee and headed to the table. It sloshed in my cup when I heard knocking on my door and I jumped. Cautiously, I snuck to the peephole to check. I frowned when I saw Everett standing there, box of doughnuts and takeout coffee in hand.
“What—” I opened the door and gaped at him.
“Mornin’, Willard. You’re up early today. I brought you and little sister some breakfast.” He pushed passed me and placed the box on the table. He sipped the coffee with a wink. “This is for me, but I’ll share if you ask me nicely.”
“’Kay…” My heart busted apart in my chest into a million tiny pieces that all wanted the same thing—for him to call me Willa. I wanted it in the worst way. He stood there smiling at me just like nothing had ever happened between us. Meanwhile, I stood there ogling his bulging biceps and broad chest in his perfectly snug white T-shirt. He had a red flannel shirt tied around his waist, dark blue jeans, and work boots. He was lumberjack sexy and I wanted to climb him like a freaking tree and let him bang my brains out ag
ain. Brains were so overrated. Nothing good ever came of my decisions anyway, so why bother using it anymore? My head whipped to the side as Gracie entered the room, flinging the bedroom door aside to dramatically announce her presence. What was it with these people? Smiling and alert like mornings weren’t meant for moping. And now, for pining and yearning like a sap.
“Ooooh, doughnuts!” Gracie squealed as she ran to the table. “I knew I overheard that word. Yes! Thank you, Everett!” She flipped the box open and took a chocolate-iced, pink-sprinkled extravaganza out, sinking her teeth in for a huge bite. “Mmmmmm,” she groaned. My gaze turned toward her.
“You’re welcome,” he chuckled as he watched her antics. Then with a pointed look he glanced at me. “Eat up, Willie Bean. I’m going to be in and out of here all day finishing the alarm system and installing the fence.”
Ah, so that’s what it was. Obligation—the same sense of duty Wyatt felt. Those Monroe brothers were something else—always honorable and kind, just like their Momma raised them to be. Everyone in town knew about Becky Lee Monroe’s pride in her boys. She was famous for it. It wasn’t bragging; it mostly had to do with her graciously accepting compliments whenever she heard of something wonderful one of them had done.
“Thanks, Everett,” I muttered. “Nice of you to think of us.” His knowing look and sideways smirk hit me like a caress.
“You’re welcome, Willard. Anything you need, anytime. Always,” his voice grew dark and growly with promises as he finished his statement.
“Okay…” I murmured to his back as he walked toward the door and shut it behind himself as he left.
“Holy crap, Willa. You’re so crazy. If I had someone like him, I’d be tapping that ass twenty-four seven.”
I spun around to face her. “Gracie!” My shocked expression made her laugh.
“What?” She stuffed the rest of her doughnut into her mouth with a wicked grin. “Sorry if this disillusions you, but I ain’t no virgin.”
My eyes almost popped out of my head. “Uh, no. I mean—I—I wasn’t a virgin when I was sixteen either,” I confessed. Was honesty the best policy here? I lost my virginity to Tommy when I was fifteen and he was twenty-one. I thought my dreams had come true. He used to be so dreamy and treated me like—well exactly what Sabrina said the other day—like he was obsessed with me. What a foolish girl I had been.
“Don’t worry, I’m on the pill and I use condoms. Clara told me everything.” Condoms. My stomach sank down to my feet and came back up with a lurch.
Oh. My. God.
Last night Everett and I didn’t use protection. And when he came—aside from it being the hottest thing I’d ever seen, all muscle-flexy and growly and intense—he did it inside of me, not anywhere else fun. Gah! I was not on the pill, or taking a shot, or sporting an IUD. Shit, shit, shit. I soooo did not need this right now.
“Dang, Willa, you turned all white. Did you see a ghost?” She thrust a doughnut at me. “Eat something. You’ll feel better.” I took the doughnut, but I would not feel better. I would never feel better. I was stuck in an eternal loop of stupidity and suffering the consequences of my bad choices.
My heart dropped as adrenaline shot through my system and I started worrying about Tommy again. The worry was mitigated a bit by the fact that Wyatt and the Green Valley Sheriff Department were keeping an eye on the situation, and therefore me. Still! What had I done to my life? Who was I right now with my flip-flopping emotions and crazy thoughts?
“Thanks, Gracie.” My distracted whisper made Gracie laugh. She probably thought I was just pining over Everett instead of having the ultimate existential crisis. I broke the doughnut in half and bit half of that off. I chewed and I obsessed—tasting nothing but dread as I sank back into the kitchen chair, pushing my mug of coffee aside.
“I’m taking a shower, space-girl. Try not to freak out while I’m in there.” Gracie patted my head and laughed at my vacant expression.
“I’m going to lunch with Sabrina, then to work. Want to come?” I offered.
“Can’t. I have somewhere to be, then I’m off to school. It’s nice being so close to town. And Ruby finally got her driver’s license. She’s going to drive me to the farm tonight to pack my stuff.”
“Oh yeah, of course—school.”
“You might want to get more sleep before you leave the house, Willa.” She laughed at my blank expression, then darted toward the bathroom.
I stuffed the rest of my doughnut into my mouth and let my mind wander.
Chapter Fourteen
Everett
“Everett, if you’re going to like someone, love them. Don’t just stand up for yourself; fight for yourself, and if you’re going to be strong, you may as well aim for invincible.”
Papaw Joe
I flipped the closed sign around and propped my shop door open before heading inside to get everything set up for Garrett. He would be working the shop for me today while I finished installing the security system at the house and started the new fence. Sunlight filled the space as I yanked open the shades, sending the tiny dust motes flying off into the light beams. I waved to Suzie Samuels when I spotted her across the street doing the same thing I was. She smiled and waved back until a man with a beard came up from behind to sweep her into his arms. I grinned, happy for her.
Main Street was busy today, as it always was on a Saturday afternoon. People on the street bustled about as life went on, just like it was supposed to. Like I should do but couldn’t. Why did I keep finding myself in impossible situations like this? Wanting things I had little chance of getting? Falling for women who would never want the real me? I sighed as I went behind the counter to ready the cash register for Garrett.
What I felt for Willa was so much more than falling. I was already gone for her in a way I had never experienced. She was under my skin, infiltrating my every thought, inside my heart in a way I would never get her out and it scared me. I saw the heartbreak coming from miles away, and even that didn’t stop me from putting myself on the line for her. From the moment I’d met her, little by little, month by month, she’d taken over my heart without even trying.
“Hey, Everett.” I looked up with a start to see Gracie, waving my ‘help wanted’ sign over her head as she approached the counter. “I can help,” she stated with a smirk.
“Uh, hi, Gracie. Do you have any retail experience?”
“Yeah, I have loads of experience. I used to work for my mom. You can call her and ask her about how I tripled her honey sales at the Green Valley Farmers’ Market. Or call Frankie. You know Frankie? And you should really be online, Everett. You need a website. I can help with that too.”
“You can?”
“Yup.” She pulled a business card from her pocket and slid it across the counter. I took it with a small grin.
“Look, I’ll be honest with you. I don’t really need the money and I prefer to make my own hours, but I think this could be a mutually beneficial set-up for the both of us. I want to see what a regular after school gig would be like, and you need my help with Willa. Plus, I need to work on my rogue—Ruby and Marianne and the rest of the girls from the debate team want to meet here after school on Fridays to play.” My eyebrows shot up to my hairline as I tried to prevent my jaw from dropping. “Oh, and by the way, Willa put me in charge of making the list of apartments for us to call so we can move out—”
“What? You can’t move—”
“Don’t worry, I’m good at stalling and I usually get my way. So, about that job?”
“You’re hired. Does tomorrow after school work for you?”
“Perfection. Thanks, Everett.” She wadded up my help wanted sign and shot it into the garbage can at the side of the counter like a basketball. “Swish! Later.”
“Yeah, you’re welcome. Later.” Just like her sister, Gracie had steamrolled me. I shook my head to clear it while wondering where all the girl gamers had been back when I was in high school. Sheesh.
“Yo, Ev.” Ga
rrett entered, ever present cup of coffee in hand and an easy smile on his face.
“Thanks for covering for me.”
“No problem. I’d rather work here than work on that freaking house at Bandit Lake. Barrett is driving me crazy. ‘Historical accuracy, structural integrity combined with an organic approach to the regional blah blah fucking blah.’” I laughed as he mocked our older brother. Barrett could be a stickler for details and a bit rigid in his ideals. In other words, he was a giant pain in the ass sometimes. “Dad hired Sadie Hill. Did you hear? Barrett lost his damn mind over that. Especially after Dad told him to get over old crushes and grow the fuck up. It was hilarious.”
“Wow, Sadie Hill?”
“I know. Sisters, man—”
“Hello.” Cowboy booted footsteps sounded through the doorway and we both turned toward the sound, only for me to lurch forward as black rage blinded me and Garrett shoved a hand into my chest to hold me back. Tommy Ferris stood in the doorway with a huge smile radiating out of his smug face.
“What do you want?” Garrett asked.
“I’m looking for Everett. Long time, no see, bud.” he said to me, quirking one eyebrow up in amusement as he glanced at Garrett’s hand on my chest. My curt nod only amused him even more as Garrett stepped in front of me to cage me in behind the counter with his body. “My wife rents a room from you—” I didn’t even recognize the sound that came out of me after I heard the word, ‘wife’ come out of his mouth. Garrett shifted to lean back forcefully, shoving me into the wall behind the counter and holding me there with his body.
Carpentry and Cocktails: A Heartfelt Small Town Romance (Green Valley Library Book 5) Page 11