by Owen Mullen
Derek restated his position in case his brother-in-law had missed it. ‘I’ll be frank with you, Gavin. As much as I appreciate the support, your sister isn’t a subject I’m keen to discuss. In fact, I’d rather not talk about her at all. She was the one who decided to leave, so that’s that as far as I’m concerned.’
‘I understand.’
‘Do you? I doubt it. Whose idea was this, anyway? Adele’s?’ He shook his head. ‘Why don’t people mind their own business?’
‘She means well.’
‘And that’s the most disturbing bit of it.’ He set his frustration aside. ‘Let me put my cards on the table and save us both some time. I realise this may sound harsh: I’ve no idea where she is, or who she’s with. The saddest part is…I don’t care.’
‘Are you sure she’s gone for good? Could be hiding out for a few days to teach you a lesson.’
‘Yes, I’m sure.’
‘How can you be, she’s never done this before?’
‘Would you know if it was Monica?’
Gavin didn’t reply. He said, ‘At the party she seemed desperately unhappy.’
Derek’s hands balled at his sides. ‘Unhappy! Of course she was unhappy. And she wasn’t the only one. Mackenzie was ruining our lives – mine as well as her own – with drink. You saw the state she was in. I wouldn’t allow it, so I was the bad guy.’ He looked at the floor and shook his head.
‘You can’t imagine what living with an alcoholic is like. Not knowing what you’re coming home to.’
Gavin remembered the anxiety in his mother’s voice when he’d phoned home.
‘Alcohol was a problem for her in the past.’
‘She blamed her childhood.’
Gavin reacted. ‘Mackenzie had a great childhood. I know. I was there.’
‘Not how she remembers it. You and Adele were the original family. She was the ‘surprise’ – the outsider. She felt left out… the kid nobody wanted.’
‘That just isn’t true. Mum and Dad doted on her. If anything they gave her too much.’
‘Try telling her. If you’re looking to justify your behaviour I suppose it’s as good an excuse as any.’
The conversation had taken an uncomfortable turn. They didn’t speak until Gavin said, ‘I assume there hasn’t been any contact?’
‘None. Didn’t expect any.’
‘Have you tried phoning her?’
‘No. And I won’t. Absolutely not.’
‘Did she take much with her?’
‘Nothing.’
‘What do you mean, nothing? What about money and credit cards?’
Derek shrugged, irritated. ‘Look, I really haven’t given it much thought, although, you’re right. I should put a stop on them. Fucked if I’m paying for her fun. But what she took isn’t important. It doesn’t matter.’
Suddenly he looked even older and Gavin didn’t believe him. Derek said, ‘Listen, I appreciate what you’re both trying to do though, not to put too fine a point on, it I don’t give a flying-fuck any more. I’ve other things on my mind.’
He sat down and quickly stood up again. ‘I’m having another drink. Want one?’
‘I won’t, thanks. Zero tolerance and all that.’
‘Suit yourself.’
He went to the kitchen, leaving Gavin alone. The lounge was as big as most people’s homes. Money had been spent and it showed: tastefully decorated, leaning towards minimalist – a lot to leave behind.
Derek came back with a cut-glass tumbler of whisky. ‘Sure you won’t change your mind.’
‘No. I better get going. I just thought it was important you know we’re here for you.’
* * *
A box of Black Magic sat open on the coffee table. Monica lay on the couch, dressed for bed, working her way through it when Gavin came through the door. She spoke through a mouthful of chocolate. ‘How did it go?’
He made a face and fell into the armchair opposite. ‘Derek says he’s past caring but you should see him, Mo. He’s aged ten years.’
‘Has he heard from her?’
‘Not a word. Doesn’t even know how much cash she’s taken, credit cards, or anything.’
Monica put a hazelnut swirl in her mouth. ‘The benefit of being well-off, I suppose.’
‘“Well-off” doesn’t describe it. The bloody house is three times the size of this.’
‘I remember. Have to be crazy to turn your back on it.’
Gavin reached over and picked up a chocolate. ‘Looks like that’s exactly what she’s done. Hasn’t even taken her clothes.’
Monica sat up. ‘What? None of them?’
He shook his head. ‘I asked. He’s not sure. He’s not sure about anything at the moment, poor bastard.’
Monica didn’t want to panic her husband. She searched for the right words and didn’t find them. ‘He must have that wrong. There isn’t a woman on the planet who would leave without her clothes.’
He hadn’t grasped the significance of what his wife was saying. ‘Maybe she didn’t take them because Derek bought them. Maybe she didn’t have time.’
‘How? What was the rush? Could’ve been packing stuff for days. I would’ve been.’
‘Good to know. If things start disappearing from the wardrobe I’ll prepare myself for the worst.’
She didn’t smile. ‘What I’m saying is she would’ve taken them unless…she left in a hurry.’
Gavin took his phone out of his pocket. ‘I’m going to call Mackenzie. She’ll accuse me of interfering in her life, but too bad.’
He tapped his sister’s number into his phone and heard the continuous hum of a dead line.
‘Unobtainable, how can that be?’
‘Could be she’s changed her number?’
‘Adele might know.’
Adele Gardiner was sitting in the kitchen, watching the clock. Blair should’ve been home two hours ago and she had no idea where he was. When her mobile rang she assumed it was him.
‘Where the hell are you?’
Gavin said, ‘Is this the wrong time?’
‘Oh sorry. Didn’t realise it was you.’
‘No problem. Wanted to give you an update. I saw Derek today.’
‘How is he?’
‘About as well as you’d expect a guy to be when his wife runs away with her lover.’
‘Has the stupid bitch contacted him?’
‘No, she hasn’t, why I’m calling you. Her number’s unobtainable. Has she changed it, do you know?’
‘I tried yesterday and couldn’t get through. Suppose she must have.’
‘And I discovered something Monica thinks is disturbing. It seems Mackenzie left without taking her clothes.’
‘Mmmm… that is odd.’
‘Derek isn’t sure but he thinks she didn’t take anything.’
‘Nothing at all? She’d have to be out of her mind. Then again, as we saw at the party, the silly idiot isn’t thinking straight, is she? Get him to have a proper look and call me back. Blair isn’t home yet. Something came up at work.’
The untruth fell awkwardly between them. Gavin let it go. Derek answered on the first ring and couldn’t keep his disappointment hidden when he heard his brother-in-law’s voice. ‘Oh, it’s you. Thought that might be Mackenzie.’
‘Yeah, sorry about that, mate. Monica and Adele don’t like the sound of her leaving without at least some of her clothes. As women, it feels off. Could you have another look and see what’s gone?’
‘Hold on.’
Five minutes later, Derek was back. ‘I’m not the best judge. Your sister has more shoes than Imelda Marcos, let alone clothes.’
‘So what’s missing?’
The pause lasted a long time. Derek seemed to be struggling to get the words out.
‘If I had to guess…I’d say nothing’s missing. They’re all there.’
Not good news. ‘What about her mobile, has she changed her number?’
‘I’d be the last to know, wouldn’t
I?’
‘Well, it’s likely she has. Nobody can reach her. I’ve tried. Adele’s tried.’
Maybe Gavin was mistaken but when Derek spoke he imagined a trace of something in his voice that, on another day, he’d call smug satisfaction.
‘Then it’s not just me. Mackenzie doesn’t want anything to do with any of us.’
* * *
The conversation had ended on a disquieting note. Mackenzie leaving, taking nothing, was disturbing enough without hearing his young sister resented her siblings and had done all her life. It hardly seemed possible the cherished late baby, the cute tomboy they’d all adored, was in reality a mass of insecurity who’d misunderstood her place in the family. They’d lived under the same roof – albeit only for a short time before Gavin went off to university – joking round the dinner table, in different ways winding their parents up; laughing about it together: the gang of three. To be told Mackenzie remembered herself as invisible concerned her brother because it wasn’t true.
Behind those big brown eyes, demons had been hiding, telling her lies, slowly poisoning her mind. Given that, what had come later wasn’t a surprise.
He didn’t discuss it with Monica; her reaction was predictable. After she’d gone to bed he remembered Adele had asked him to ring her back. He took out his mobile and checked the time: ten forty-five. A bit late, except he’d promised and Adele was a worrier. She’d worry even more if she didn’t hear from him. Gavin imagined her turning the news about Mackenzie not taking her clothes over in her mind and fretting. She’d turned the blue Vectra Derek had seen into proof her husband was having an affair with her sister. Crazy stuff.
She answered on the first ring, her voice heavy with sleep. He said, ‘It’s me. Sorry about the time. I completely forgot.’
For a moment, his sister seemed not to understand what he was saying. ‘What? Oh, oh yes, the clothes.’
‘Derek’s as sure as he can be Mackenzie hasn’t taken anything with her.’
‘He must have that wrong. She’s got so many clothes, how could he tell? How could anyone tell?’
‘I agree, but that’s what he thinks.’
‘So what do we do?’
‘Until she contacts one of us, there’s nothing we can do.’
They’d reached an impasse. On instinct Gavin said, ‘Did Blair sort out his work problem?’
Seconds passed. When Adele replied, her tone was stiff, defensive, and he realised he’d asked the wrong question. ‘I really couldn’t say. I haven’t seen him. He hasn’t come home.’
Day Eight
The Baxter House
Lowther Hills
She hadn’t slept, not even for a second. The moment he’d uttered those words the hope she’d been clinging to died.
If he didn’t know what she was talking about, then it wasn’t about money. So what did that leave? Mackenzie remembered stories – horror stories – about women who’d been held against their will for decades before they’d been freed.
Not months, not even years: decades.
After he’d gone, she’d lain on the bed shaking with fear as the fantasy she’d told herself dissolved. In the aftermath, no one was spared: superior insecure Adele, jealous of her from childhood, and pathetic Blair, who’d fancied her for years but had never had the guts to do anything about it; Gavin her big brother – big brother, that was a laugh – and his bitch-faced wife. Too absorbed in their own little world to see how badly she’d needed them. And last but by no means least, Derek: demanding and controlling – a public saint and a private tyrant. She hated all of them.
Mackenzie made a decision: she’d starve herself to death rather than let this bastard win. She ripped the sandwich cartons open and poured soup and the cold coffee over the contents, grinding them with her heel, feeling strength return because she’d taken back control. Her concentration had been so intense she hadn’t heard him arrive.
‘Well, well, well,’ he said, mocking her. ‘You won’t need this, then.’
He turned and climbed the stairs. Mackenzie screamed defiantly after him. ‘That’s right, bastard! Take it away. I’d rather die. Do you hear? I’d rather die.’
Sitting on the bed, the consequences of what she’d done crashed in. The spoiled food was already attracting the rats. She heard them scurrying behind the damp walls, gnawing the concrete; excited. Mackenzie had learned about the Black Death in school. The seemingly harmless nursery rhyme Ring a Ring O’ Roses was written about the symptoms: people who were healthy when they went to bed could be dead the next morning. Rats had caused it. Centuries ago, but the fear in her survived. How could she sleep knowing they might be crawling over her, at first biting out of curiosity before one of them drew blood, and the frenzy began?
Many believed the plague was a divine punishment for sins against God – greed, heresy and fornication – and the only way to survive was to win the Almighty’s forgiveness. On another day, Mackenzie would’ve laughed at the nonsense from an unenlightened past. Not today. Today she didn’t laugh. Instead she sang, absently playing with her hair:
Ring a ring o’ roses,
a pocket full of posies;
atishoo, atishoo,
We all fall down.’
Eventually, with nothing to hold on to, she took sanctuary in denial, telling herself it wasn’t true. It couldn’t be true. He was toying with her. Fucking with her head for fun. Playing games because he could. Cruel games. Like wearing the balaclava when she’d already seen his face.
* * *
It was morning and Blair was sleeping beside her. Adele had waited until one o’clock before crawling off the couch and going to bed, so had no idea when he’d finally come home. She stared at the bedroom window, angry and hurt and close to tears. Marriage was difficult to make work over the long haul. Counting the number of truly successful relationships she knew could be done on one hand; the excitement faded, familiarity brought discontent, the inevitable infidelity and the predictably acrimonious split. Adele had never been unfaithful, never even considered it, and, until recently, believed Blair could say the same. Most of their friends were divorced, a fortunate few tolerating the needed compromises of living together with a new partner.
If that was happiness, then she guessed they were happy.
Her and Blair were different, at least, so she’d told herself. But not anymore. Somewhere along the way they’d lost each other. The marriage was on the rocks. Blair stirred and Adele lay still. A row would wake the twins asleep next door. They weren’t stupid, they’d already sussed things weren’t right between their parents. The truth was, she was past caring. He rolled onto his back and rubbed his eyes. His wife’s question set the agenda. ‘Who is she? Who is she, Blair?’
He groaned, got out of bed without answering and staggered to the bathroom. The sound of the shower came through the wall. Adele pulled on her dressing gown and went to the kitchen. But ordinary familiar things brought no comfort. The coffee machine, the toaster, the blue and white cups they’d drank from a thousand times, were no match for betrayal. It couldn’t be helped if the boys heard them arguing. Putting a brave face on it for their sake wasn’t protecting them, it was dishonest – they’d learn sooner or later.
She sipped her cappuccino, wishing it was something stronger, and waited for her husband to come down. When he did, she started where she’d left off. ‘Who is she? And don’t insult me with a lie.’
Blair kept his voice low. ‘This isn’t the time.’
‘Really? I disagree. It’s as good a time as any as far as I’m concerned.’
‘We’ll talk later. I’m not prepared to have this discussion now.’
His arrogance astonished her. ‘Oh! You’re not prepared. Well, screw you, Blair Gardiner. It’s happening. Where the hell were you last night?’
He wouldn’t be drawn. ‘When the boys have had breakfast I’ll run them to school.’
‘You’ll be late for work.’
‘I’m not going in.’
&n
bsp; The phone rang in the lounge. Adele screamed, ‘Who the hell is that?’ and brushed past her husband to get to it. Before Gavin could speak his sister cut him off. ‘Not now. Bad timing. Call you in half an hour.’
They ate breakfast in silence, the twins subdued, sensing something wasn’t right and, for once, didn’t noise each other up. Their father finished his coffee and rose from the table.
‘Soon as you’re ready I’ll be in the car.’
Alone in the house with her world falling around her, Adele cried. Blair wasn’t the only one who wasn’t going to work today. She showered, felt a little better, then returned Gavin’s call. He immediately noticed the strain in her voice. ‘Everything alright?’
‘Since you ask, not really.’
‘Want to talk about it?’
She ignored the question and answered with one of her own. ‘Any news about Mackenzie? Has she contacted Derek?’
‘No, she hasn’t and that’s why you’re hearing from me when you obviously would prefer not to. I’m beginning to feel uneasy about this. I think Mackenzie’s in trouble.’
‘What kind of trouble?’
‘Don’t know, but something’s not right I suggested to Derek her disappearing act might not be what it seems. Maybe she’s trying to scare him, staying at a friend’s house. He didn’t think so, though I want to follow up on it anyway. Do you have phone numbers for any of the crowd she used to hang out with?’
‘That was years ago. But Karen’s the receptionist at our dentist. See her whenever I take the boys for a check-up.’
‘The redhead?’
‘That’s her.’
‘Where is your dentist?’