The Gentleman Incubus

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The Gentleman Incubus Page 15

by E. M. Hardy

“So… you’ll let me run a few more tests?”

  Glenn sighed and slumped his own shoulders even as Sam’s eyes glittered with anticipation. “Sure. But please… no more blessed stuff, okay?”

  ***

  Glenn made a face as Samantha laid a match on the small briquette sitting snugly inside the flimsy-looking metal cage of the disposable stove.

  “And you’re positive this will work?”

  Samantha ignored him as she stuck a tongue out of her lip and focused on setting the hexamine tablet on fire. She mumbled a curse when she failed, still ignoring Glenn, and pulled another match to set the thing alight.

  “There we go!” she proudly exclaimed as the first blue hint of a fire caught on the little chunk. “I’d be using your stove for this… if only you had a real gas stove instead of that goop-dispensing piece of junk.”

  “It’s less goopy, more slushy, you know,” Glenn weakly protested. “Like a smoothie.”

  “It’s still chemical goop,” sniffed the woman as she laid a small can on top of the now-burning stove. She sprinkled a mixture of herbs, crushed minerals, and a dead, dried something inside the can before stepping back to avoid the resulting smoke.

  She moved behind the stove, putting it between her and Glenn, and peered at him through the haze. Samantha squinted into the smoke for a few moments and nodded to herself, satisfied with the results.

  “Did it work?”

  “A-yup,” chirped Samantha as her eyes unfocused, moving this way and that while she jotted down a mental note via her implant HUD. “Would have had to spend a lot more time and money going through the other rituals to ID a demon. Still, it’s impressive how your dass knows so much about demons. Weird too.”

  Glenn just shrugged. “Yeah, she has her moments.”

  “She?”

  “It… I meant it. Oh, who am I kidding? Yeah, throw me in the camp that humanizes their digital assistants.”

  Ynnistoria: Why thank you, Glenn. I appreciate being acknowledged, especially with how hard-headed you are. You’d think that a Lust Demon can’t stoop so low as to work with—

  ImmerCorp Anti-Malware Shield has detected anomalous behavior! Please wait a moment while we clear that up for you!

  Ynnistoria: Glenn, you have received [1] mail from [Park Lee Min] titled “re:details about the photo-ops from the powers that be.” Sender has tagged the mail as top priority.

  … … … … … … … … … … …

  ImmerCorp Anti-Malware scan completed! Anomalous behavior confirmed as a false positive. We apologize for the inconvenience!

  Glenn filed the mail away, silently minimizing the alert and selecting an option to remind him once again in the next sixty minutes. Samantha finished up writing her own notes, and proceeded to splash water on both the smoldering mixture and the still-burning tablets inside the stove.

  “Okay, so now we know that the smoke lets me see through your human disguise, reveals your inner nature to me.”

  Sam uttered the words from a purely clinical point of view, without a hint of malice in them. Glenn still found himself wincing as the words hit him. “It’s not a disguise; I am human.”

  “No, not really,” Samantha blurted out absent-mindedly. “I mean, you’ve got your human form and your demon form. As for what you really are, I really don’t think you can be considered…” Her eyes refocused, signaling her return to the real world. It took her only a second to realize exactly what she had been saying. “Ah, shit. I mean… it’s not like that. I didn’t really mean it like that.”

  Glenn sighed sadly, waving Samantha’s concerns away before she could get all flustered up. “That’s… never mind. You do have a point anyway. Most people don’t have the same needs I do, and I do automatically shift to my incubus form when I get too low on life points.” He inclined his head in thought before nodding to himself. “Yeah. You’re right that I’m not entirely human anymore. Still, I’d like to think of myself as somewhat human if that works?”

  “Yeah, that totally works,” Samantha followed up, apparently eager to veer the discussion away from awkward territory.

  Glenn decided to help her out in that regard. “So, uh, Samantha… why’d you and the others decide to dabble in witchcraft?”

  “Hmm? Oh, no real reason. Just for laughs, really,” she fumbled out, trying very hard to avoid Glenn’s eyes as she started tidying up her stuff.

  “Just for laughs?”

  “A-yup. I thought it’d be cool if I could just flick my wand, go wingardium leviosa, and get stuff to float around.”

  “That… sounds cool. Is that a real spell?”

  “Depends on whether an owl will fly through your window with a mysterious letter in tow. Oh wait… that’s wizardry, not witchcraft.”

  “…is that a reference to something? Because if it is, then I’m sorry but it just flew right over my head.”

  “Uncultured swine,” sniffed Samantha in mock-disdain. “I can’t believe there are so many people out there ignorant of the classics.”

  “Sorry about that,” Glenn chuckled, gauging a lighthearted response as appropriate for Samantha’s deflecting attitude.

  Samantha studied Glenn more intently then, and her lips thinned out in an unreadable expression. “You’re weird.”

  “Hmm?”

  “I said you’re weird.”

  Glenn just blinked at Samantha, who crossed her arms and frowned as she studied Glenn some more.

  “Um… okay?”

  Samantha returned Glenn’s befuddled expression with one of her own. “You’re too… how do I put this… humble? Meek? Disinterested?” She huffed in frustration, deepening her frown as she considered him. “Long story short, you don’t fit into the typical mold of those who dabble in the occult.”

  “I… thanks, I guess?”

  “That wasn’t meant to be a compliment.”

  “Oh. I mean, I didn’t ask to be an incubus. I just woke up one day and bam—I suddenly need to screw to stay alive. Quite literally.”

  That managed to wring a grudging chortle out of Samantha, her shoulders shaking as she tried and failed to contain her laughter. “Yeah, Kris and Haze make a point of emphasizing that fact every time they bring up your trysts.”

  “Well, I try to do the best I can.”

  Samantha squinted at him then, a look of suspicion crossing her face. “But over three dozen orgasms per ‘session’ as you call it? They can’t stop talking about how you can magically get them to keep going and going, but isn’t that a little on the excessive side?”

  Glenn hesitated for a moment before letting a sad smile play across his face. “Did Kristina ever tell you how I was supposed to gain life points at first?”

  Samantha nodded curtly.

  “Then you know that I was meant to use my powers to kill Kristina… to kill my victims. All it takes is one shot, and I’d have sucked up all of her life in one explosive release.” Glenn raised his hand, looking at the back of it before flipping it to stare at the inside. “I don’t know exactly how or why it happened, but I’m thankful that I get my life point fix through alternative methods. Better a couple dozen orgasms than outright killing them.”

  He allowed his smile to widen a little bit after that. “And besides, I take pleasure in helping Kris and Haze enjoy themselves. Nothing boosts a man’s ego more than seeing his partner moan in ecstasy over and over again… at least that’s how it works on my end.”

  Samantha straightened her face, nodded briskly while a red flush crept up her neck and ears. That flush quickly died down as her expression cooled and turned somber. “Not everyone thinks that way, though. Some people enjoy grinding others down under their thumb, get some perverse kick out of making you suffer. They might pretend to be nice people on the surface, all prim and proper and polite, but they’ll readily dance over your corpse just for the heck of it.”

  She turned to look Glenn straigh
t in the eye. “That’s why I turned to witchcraft.”

  Glenn nodded silently, matching Samantha’s sober tone.

  “To answer your original question, Glenn, I started diving into all this because I wanted power. I want the power to prevent anyone from hurting me ever again, from humiliating me and embarrassing me. I want power to hex and curse and hurt anyone who so much as tries touching me,” Her voice grew more intense with each passing word, her lips curling up into an angry sneer. “I never want to be a victim ever again.”

  “And the others?” Glenn added softly. “What brought Kristina and Hazel to join you in your pursuit of power?”

  Samantha sniffed as she remembered herself, pushing her spectacles up the bridge of her nose. “Hell if I know, to be honest. They came over to my place for a sleepover, recognized the totems I left lying around in my room, and decided they wanted in. Now I have two coven-sisters who hover over me like overprotective mother hens, even if I know more about witchcraft than the both of them combined.”

  Samantha inclined her head sideways, sticking out her lower lip as she started thinking to herself. “Come to think of it, why do they hang out around me? I mean, we shouldn’t even have clicked together. Hazel is the glitzy, ditzy strumpet who keeps a literal harem of boytoys at her beck and call. Kristina is the gung-ho, go-getter goth girl who will break your balls if you so much as look at her the wrong way.”

  Samantha cast a sideways glance at Glenn, her lips contorting to a puzzled frown. “Come to think of it, why didn’t she break your balls when you broke into her apartment?”

  Glenn nodded at that, studiously ignoring Samantha’s last statement. Kristina revealed on that first night that being assaulted by a demon of lust was one of her hottest fantasies. He got lucky in that regard, since he was pretty sure most normal women would have freaked out if they woke up to a hulking, naked demon looming over them.

  He knew the girls were close, but he wasn’t quite sure if Kristina wanted him to air out something as private as that. So he did what he did best when put on the spot: he deflected.

  “You make it sound as if you don’t deserve to have them as friends,” he uttered softly, bouncing the question back to Samantha.

  The novice witch wasn’t fooled; she quickly saw that he was trying to steer the conversation in a different direction. She was at least gracious enough to acknowledge his distraction.

  She sniffed and pondered his question for a few moments, chewing on her lower lip while she did so.

  “Yeah. I mean… what do they see in me? What possible benefit would they get from befriending a geek, a nerd, who couldn’t even land a guy?”

  Samantha Walsh

  Frustrated. Puzzled. Stumped.

  Doubtful. Insecure. Worried.

  Gloomy. Cautious. Insecure.

  Glenn quirked his brow at that. “You know what, you do have a point.”

  Samantha whipped her head up to face Glenn, her eyes wide in surprise… and just a little hint of offense.

  For his part, Glenn simply nodded to himself as he brought his voice flat and low—removing every trace of friendliness and amiability that he normally modulated into his speech. “Both Hazel and Kristina are in a decidedly higher social stratum than you are. They are also richer than you are, possessing more financial assets, and you offer nothing of tangible value to their group. The only possible reason they would include you in their group would be to create a flunky that would emphasize how socially superior they are.”

  Samantha just stood there, staring slack-jawed at Glenn as he stared dispassionately at her. “Wow. Just… wow. You do realize you’re supposed to pity me and then shower me with compliments to make me feel better, right?”

  “That’s the pragmatic or cynical way of looking at why they hang around you. The more optimistic one is that they simply like you in a weird sort of way and just enjoy spending time around you. Like this adorably dorky little hedgehog that waddles around, all spiny and stuff, but is nice and soft and gooey on the inside.”

  Glenn followed up his spiel with a shrug and let a slow smile spread across his face. “But that’s just me. Kris and Haze may be a lot of things, but I don’t think they’re the bitchy type to go out of their way to manipulate others or make their lives miserable. But again, I’m not a hundred percent sure; you might be better off asking them directly.”

  “So…” Glenn added, allowing himself a smirk as realization began to dawn on Samantha’s sullen face. “Are my compliments enough to make you feel a little bit better?”

  Samantha huffed and punched Glenn in the solar plexus. It was a half-hearted punch though, but he just rolled with the punch and play-groaned as if she had just hit him full force.

  Mix frankness with a dash of humor and self-deprecation. It’s what the manuals taught him about having to deal with situations like these, and it appeared to work with Samantha.

  ***

  “Ynnistoria?”

  Ynnistoria: Yes, Glenn? How may I help you?

  “Please display the screen.”

  Glenn knew that his command was vague, that he should have worded it better. His mysterious digital assistant, however, chose not to harangue him this time around. She understood his intent and brought up the relevant information.

  Glenn Olson

  Life Points: 1,782/2,200

  Experience Points: 5,319/3,000

  You have gained enough XP to level up!

  Glenn stared long and hard at the menu floating on his HUD, suddenly feeling ashamed of himself. He’d been sitting on his experience points for nearly a month now—three weeks to be exact. Kristina and Hazel eagerly called him up for a session, but he didn’t want to drain them dry by relying solely on them.

  Regularly paying visits to sex workers fixed that problem quite easily. He did the math, and figured that he would need to rotate seven partners a week to ensure they could recover their life points enough. Clara, Ecstasy, Mary, Pearl, Nancy, Lindsey, Roberta—these were the partners he decided to stick with for each day of the week.

  To be honest though, paying for the services of a sex worker everyday was starting to affect the amount of money he normally tucked away for himself. His frugal lifestyle was the only reason he wasn’t completely broke.

  This, along with Kristina’s and Hazel’s sessions, was why he was able to accrue enough converted life force to level up.

  And yet he could never bring himself to advance to the next stage.

  Funny. Glenn always looked forward to leveling-up in the games he played. He just leveled up that day as well, bringing his bishop in Five Wars Online up to level 40. And yet he just couldn’t bring himself to do the same when it was his own life at stake.

  First was the fear of making a mistake. There were no NPCs around to help him reset his stats, no way to create a new avatar from scratch if he messed up his build. Any decisions he made now were binding, permanent. He would have to live with the consequences of his decisions, and there were no handy guides or wikis to inform of his next steps.

  Second was the simple idea of accepting his demonic nature. Moving on from fledgling incubus to the next stage meant that he would strengthen what he was, cement this new lifestyle of his. Ynnistoria never outright argued with him, but she strongly hinted that this change was final. Still, he held out hope that maybe the whole incubus thing would just go away if he ignored it long enough.

  Each passing week slowly disabused him of that fantasy, however.

  Third and most important of all was the simple fact that he didn’t need to level up. There was no real reason to change the status quo, disrupt the routine he set up for himself. He could easily survive his day-to-day life as an incubus by keeping low.

  Samantha’s words, however, changed all that.

  Here was a girl that grasped at whatever force she could to empower herself. Never mind that she was diving headfirst into forces she did
not completely understand. She wanted to protect herself, protect her friends, and wholeheartedly decided to cultivate her budding talents as a witch.

  Maybe if he was stronger, if he had more tools at his disposal, he could better protect himself—protect the people he loved.

  That one word snapped him out of his reverie. Glenn couldn’t remember ‘loving’ anyone or anything. Sure, he coasted through life one day at a time, doing what needed to be done to survive and fit in with others when needed. But love… that was supposed to be this weird abstract concept that should have had nothing to do with him.

  There were times when he had dreams of this woman—a mysterious faceless woman that he loved no matter what. The intensity of those feelings, the confusion and suffering that came with loving others… they felt so vivid.

  Those dreams, however, were just that—dreams. Love in its purest form was something that some people were lucky enough to experience, and he didn’t count himself among those lucky few.

  One thing was for certain though: he didn’t want to see his new friends end up dead like Ananya, preyed upon by those with greater powers because she couldn’t protect herself.

  He felt an annoyingly familiar migraine flair up in his head. He rubbed his temples and sighed as he dismissed the thought.

  “Ynnistoria… confirm the level-up.”

  Ynnistoria: Certainly, Glenn. May I suggest, however, that you lay down in your bed before we begin?

  Glenn blinked before deflating as his digital assistant sideswiped his resolve.

  “Um…. Okay. Why do I need to lie down for this?”

  Ynnistoria: The process will be… less than pleasant, Glenn. I recommend that you make yourself as comfortable as possible before going through the breaking—I mean, the level-up process.

 

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