“I—” He clenched his hands, the guilt was all-consuming. “I want to, Brooke. Believe me, I do. It’s just—”
The smile she offered was sad. “‘It’s just.’ I need to go. The medication I just took knocks me out.”
“No, wait, Brooke.” He grabbed her hand when she started to stand. “Please, let’s talk about this. I made a mistake.”
“We both made a mistake thinking we could make this work.” She flexed her arm as if trying to ignore his touch. “And we can’t make it work if you don’t trust me. It’s okay.” She tugged her arm free. “I understand. Believe me. Let’s keep things civil, okay? For Mandy’s sake. I don’t want her thinking any of this is her fault.”
“About her birthday—”
“Whatever you have planned, just tell me when and where and I’ll be there.” She pushed to her feet, seemed to sway a bit before she caught her balance. “And I will be there, Sebastian. For her.”
He nodded. “All right. I’ll let you know...”
She walked away without another word.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
MANDY NEEDED TO make good use of her time, so when school let out early on Thursday, she hustled over to the firehouse to recruit backup for her plan. Simon and Charlie were great with ideas, but she needed practical, hands-on experience when it came to getting what she wanted for her birthday. On her way up the hill, she spotted Kendall’s construction truck coming in the other direction.
She stopped, hoping to catch a glimpse of Kyle behind the wheel, but she ended up waving to Kendall instead. Her smile faded as soon as Kendall passed. She missed spending time with Kyle. More than she thought she would. It wasn’t just that he made her laugh and that her stomach did odd little flips whenever he was around; she felt like she’d lost a really good friend. He’d listened to her about so many things, but especially about her parents, and her mom specifically.
Whatever anger she might have had toward Brooke had never manifested completely, mainly due to Kyle’s observations. It was Kyle who had suggested her mother had done the best she could at the time and that sometimes love meant walking away when you wanted to stay more than anything. It was how he chose to think of his own mother, who had taken off and abandoned Kyle soon after his father had been killed. He’d had to forgive her, he told Mandy. Matt and Lori, his adoptive parents, had taught him it was the only way he’d be able to move forward.
“Like he’d know anything about that,” Mandy muttered and kicked at a rock.
“Hey, Mandy! What’s up, kiddo?” Frankie climbed down from on top of the main engine and hopped to the ground. “Haven’t seen you around that much. You doing okay?”
When Mandy reached her, Frankie looped an arm around Mandy’s neck and dragged her in for a hug.
“Does everyone know Kyle dumped me?”
Frankie’s wide-eyed shock didn’t pass muster. “Oh my gosh, no waaay. Oh, no! He did what?”
Mandy laughed. Aunt Frankie always made her feel better. “It’s fine. I’m fine. Boys suck.”
Frankie looked around to make sure they were alone. “Between you and me, I agree. They can indeed. What brings you by?”
“He’s not here, is he? Kyle? Hanging out with Jasper?”
“I think they are hanging out today, but not here. It’s Jasper’s day off. And you’re stalling. Meaning whatever you came to ask me you’re afraid I’ll say no to.”
Mandy grinned.
“We’ve got chocolate-chip cookies in the kitchen. Come on. I bet I’m going to need one.” Maintaining her hold on Mandy, Frankie led her into the station. “Girl talk,” she called to Roman, who had his nose buried in a computer screen.
“Proceed with caution,” he said, then did that head-tilt thing. “Hey, Mandy.”
“Hi, Roman.” Mandy sighed. Yep. Everyone knew about her and Kyle. “I told Dad what I want for my birthday.”
“Okay.” Frankie pushed the plate of cookies toward her when she sat down. Frankie snagged a cookie. “Cutting it a little close this year, aren’t you?”
“I kind of needed to. I was afraid he’d say no.”
Frankie took a bite, then dropped into a chair across from her. “Well, you’ve got me curious.”
“I want to have dinner out on one of Uncle Monty’s boats tomorrow night. Just the three of us. Me, Dad and Mom. I’ve looked at the WindWalker schedule. I know there’s a boat free.”
Frankie eyed her. “Uh-huh. And you need my help and Monty’s with...”
“Stranding them.” Mandy grinned and chewed on a cookie. “And before you say no—”
Frankie wiped the crumbs from around her mouth. “Monty already told me. You’re worried about your dad being alone.”
“Uh, yeah.” Mandy winced. “He told you?”
“Kiddo, he tells me everything. Sometimes more than I’d like. He’s hoping I might be a voice of reason here and have better luck at talking you out of this whole matchmaking idea.”
“Aw, man.” Mandy slumped back in her chair. “No one else sees it. They still love each other.”
“I see it.” Frankie took another cookie, spent a long time examining it. “But proceed with your explanation.”
“Mom says she’s thinking about staying. For good.”
“Is she?” Frankie’s eyebrows arched. “Hmm, that’s news to me. When did she say this?”
“After the barbecue. She and I were talking and...well, if she’s still thinking, maybe what she needs is a little push. And Dad’s the right person to do that.”
“Maybe he is. If I agree to help—if!” she added when Mandy popped up in her seat. “You need to be aware there’s an equal chance it’ll blow up in our faces. You can’t force two people together who don’t want to be.”
“They love each other. How can they not want to be together?”
“There’s a lot of history, Mandy. Sometimes it isn’t as simple as loving someone. I’d imagine there are trust issues, especially on your dad’s part. And that’s not easy to move beyond.”
“Well, he’s just going to have to find a way,” Mandy declared. “And I’m going to help them. Will you help me? Will you talk Monty into letting me use his boat tomorrow night?”
“Is that all you need me to do?”
Triumph surged through her. She knew she’d come to the right person. “Maybe there’s just one other thing.”
* * *
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN we can’t have my birthday dinner on the boat?”
Sebastian flinched at the sound of his daughter’s screech. He’d thought to soften the revelation by fixing Mandy her favorite banana pancakes for her birthday breakfast. “Exactly what I said.” He flipped over the first one, not surprised to see it was burned. “We’ll figure out something else to do tonight. Sky’s the limit. Wait, scratch that. No skydiving.”
“But you said it was okay, Dad.”
“I know I did, Man.” He’d lain awake all night worrying about this conversation and so far it was even worse than he’d anticipated. “It’s just not going to work out. Your mom—”
“What did you say when you asked her? You did ask her, right? You said you would.” She circled around him, so he was forced to meet her gaze. “You didn’t, did you? You lied to me!”
The absolute devastation on his daughter’s face stopped his heart. “Mandy, I didn’t lie. It’s more comp—”
“Stop saying it’s complicated,” Mandy snapped. “That’s what adults say to get out of explaining anything. Why didn’t you ask her?”
Because Brooke was right. It didn’t matter how much he and Brooke loved each other; without trust, they didn’t have anything. “Because it’s not going to work out between us.”
Mandy’s face fell. “What? Why would you say that?”
“Honey, I told you not to get your hopes up. I told you not to—”
<
br /> “What did you do? What did you say to her?”
“I... I...” He hesitated. “I accused her of trying to take you away from me.”
That seemed to get through. “Is she?” For an instant, she looked scared. “But she wouldn’t do that. Dad, I don’t believe—”
“You’re right, Man. She wouldn’t. But I thought that’s what was going on.” How could he explain this to a teenager when he could barely explain it to himself? He wanted to go back and see the scene differently, make a different decision. Have faith that Brooke would never try to take their child away from him. But he couldn’t. “I can’t trust her, Mandy. She left us. Without any goodbye. Without any explanation. As much as I care about her, as much as I wish things were different, I can’t trust her, and without trust, there’s nothing to build a relationship on.”
“There’s me!” Mandy stomped her foot. She hadn’t done that since she was two. “I trust her, Dad. And if I can, why can’t you?”
He shook his head. “It’s not that simple, Peanut.”
“Don’t call me that! It’s a baby’s name and I’m not a baby.”
No. She wasn’t a baby any longer, was she? He couldn’t protect her from the truth anymore. “It’s the way things are, Mandy. I know you’re disappointed, but believe me, this will be better in the long run.”
“Better for who?” Mandy grabbed her jacket and her backpack and headed for the door.
“Mandy, it’s still too early for school. And what about your breakfast?”
“I’m not hungry.” She slammed the door behind her. Tribble howled and skittered off the kitchen chair, where he’d been waiting for his morning pet.
“Well, that’s just great.” Sebastian threw down the spatula and flipped off the grill. “Let’s see what else I can mess up today.”
* * *
“I’M SORRY, MANDY, but I don’t think dinner with just the three of us is a good idea.” Brooke would give just about anything not to be having this conversation in the diner, during the breakfast rush, but as she’d quickly learned when she’d fully embraced motherhood, she didn’t get to pick the time and location to do battle with her teenager. How ironic said battle was being waged on Mandy’s birthday.
“But you have to come,” Mandy whined and earned a raised eyebrow from Holly, who shot Brooke a sympathetic look.
“Behold your future,” Brooke muttered when she passed.
“Steady on.” Holly squeezed her arm. “Twyla, orders up!”
“Coming!” Twyla sped past.
“Mandy, can we discuss this later, please?” Brooke offered a smile to her customers at the counter as she refilled their coffee cups.
“If you’d just say yes, we don’t have to talk about it again. Please, Mom? It’ll be perfect, I promise.”
“I will happily attend your birthday party tomorrow, Mandy. In fact, I’m looking forward to giving you your present. But as far as alone time with you and your father? The answer is no.” No matter how much it hurt to do so. She still loved Sebastian. Maybe more than she ever did. But there was nothing to build on without that foundation of trust. A foundation she had destroyed fifteen years ago. A foundation she’d finally learned could not be rebuilt.
“This is because he says he can’t trust you, isn’t it?”
Brooke’s face flushed when two of her customers clearly stopped pretending not to listen and leaned in. “Mandy, this is not the time or place.”
“But, Mom—”
“Mandy, enough.” Brooke’s temper snapped. “I’m working and, as much as I love you, I am not going to discuss the relationship between your father and me right now. We are the adults, you are the child. We’ve made the decision not to pursue this. End of conversation. Do you need a ride to school?”
Mandy whipped her backpack onto her shoulder. “You’re ruining everything!” She raced out of the diner, leaving a shaken Brooke frozen in place.
“You okay?” Holly asked when Brooke finally made it over to the coffee machine.
“I’ve been better.” She held out her hands. “Oh, wow, I’m shaking.”
“You did great. Better than great.” Holly gave her a quick hug. “I know it doesn’t feel like it, but you set boundaries and stuck to them. Welcome to parenthood.”
Thankfully, Brooke made it through the rest of her shift without any more floor shows. When she had gathered her things and was about to head out, Kyle came in looking, for want of a better term, exhausted.
“You want a table or a stool at the counter, Kyle?” She hiked her purse over her shoulder and shot him a sympathetic smile. Then, remembering what it felt like to be on the receiving end of such an expression, she stopped.
“Actually.” Kyle moved toward her. “I was hoping to talk to you for a minute. If that’s all right.”
He couldn’t have surprised her more if he’d arrived wearing a clown costume. “Sure. You want a milkshake?”
“No, thanks.”
“Okay. Holly, it’s all right if we grab a booth real quick?”
“Knock yourself out.” Holly’s confusion was evident on her face.
“What’s going on?” Brooke set her things on the bench beside her and waited for Kyle to settle.
“It’s about Mandy.”
“I figured.”
“Is she doing okay? I mean...how is she?”
Better than Kyle, apparently. The poor kid looked miserable. “She’s doing okay. How about you?”
“I miss her.” He flinched. “More than I thought I would. Mandy told me what happened with you when you were here years ago. When she was a baby. She said you left because you felt like you had to. Like you didn’t have a choice.”
Brooke had to accept pretty much everyone in town knew this story. “Yes. Essentially.”
“I know I’m probably not the kind of guy you’d want dating your daughter—”
“Kyle.” Brooke shook her head. “You’ve been good to Mandy. I saw that the first day I met you. I’m not going to define you by things you’ve done in the past. I can’t. I’d be such a hypocrite if I did.”
“She has so many dreams. So many things she wants to do,” Kyle said. “I’ve never met anyone like her. She’s—”
“You love her.” It was written all over his miserable face.
“It’s crazy, I know.” Kyle rested his head in his hands. “We’re both young and there’s so much going on, but yeah.” He sighed. “I do.”
Brooke recalled something Mandy had said in the laundry room. “You’re afraid of holding her back. You don’t want her making life decisions based on you.”
“I’d never forgive myself if she turned down something amazing because of me. Because she doesn’t want to leave Butterfly Harbor. I don’t want her to have to make a choice like that.”
“You mean a choice like I had to make. It’s okay,” she added when his cheeks went red. “I don’t want that, either. At this point it’s fair to say you know her better than I do. Do you really think Mandy wouldn’t try to find a way to get everything she wants?”
“She always does,” Kyle said with a smile. “She’s tenacious.”
“And you’re miserable without her.”
“This can’t be about me. Mandy, she can go anywhere. Do anything.”
“And she will, Kyle. With or without you.” Brooke reached out and took hold of his arm. “I understand what you were trying to do, but Mandy deserves the truth. No matter how much it hurts, she deserves to hear why you did what you...did.” Brooke swallowed hard. Oh, man. Oh, man she could just kick herself right now. “Darn it.”
“Darn what?”
“Nothing.” Brooke shook her head. She’d been a fool. Such a fool. Everyone had seen it. BethAnn, Frankie, even Monty. “Just realizing I should probably be taking my own advice.” It wasn’t as if she had anything left to
lose. “If you care about Mandy as much as you say you do, as much as I think you do, then tell her what you’ve just told me. If the two of you are meant to be together, you’ll find a way to work it out. Just...be careful, okay? Every decision you make from here on has consequences. Every decision. And she is still only just turning fifteen.” She pinned him with a look. “Understand?”
His cheeks went on full fire-alert. “Understood.”
“Good. Now, if you’ll excuse me.” She scooted out of the booth. She could fix this. She could fix everything. She just needed a little bit of help from her friends. “I need to go find my daughter and apologize for almost making yet another colossal mistake.”
* * *
“BROOKE.” SEBASTIAN PUSHED into the Butterfly Diner late Friday afternoon and found her instantly. The second he spotted Brooke, despite the concern that had brought him there, calm descended.
Despite how they’d left things between them, seeing her now eased the panic inside him. It chipped away at his determination to put some distance between them. How was it he could all but feel the tension melt away? “Sebastian.” She served the milkshake she had in her hand and reached for a towel. She looked...amazing. Healthy. Happy. Content. As if she’d finally pushed the past off her shoulders once and for all. When had that happened? “What’s wrong?”
“Have you seen Mandy today?”
“Today?” He saw the alarm that he felt jump into her eyes even before her gaze darted away. “No, I haven’t seen her since this morning. We had an argument and I went to find her to smooth things over, but I assumed she was in class. And that she was still angry with me. Why?”
“She’s not answering her cell phone.” He swore, pinched the bridge of his nose and tried to stay calm. “Her coach called a little while ago. She didn’t show up to softball practice. I checked in at the school and she cut her last two classes.”
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