He glazed over again. That seriously annoyed her. His eyes cleared once more. “Bann asks that you respect the Cyborgs who wish to limit their involvement with humans, and he will meet you at your accommodations. He does not lie.”
The fact that he had to remind her of Cyborgs not wanting to mix with humans pissed her of more, the fact that he asked her to honour their choice, embarrassing. Kate didn’t want to upset anyone else. Particularly after what many of the Cyborgs had been through. They’d never been anything other than respectful and helpful as far as she could tell. It crossed her mind that if she’d experienced what they’d been through, she wouldn’t be so nice. She sighed and nodded. “Ok, I’ll see him there,” and took off back down the corridor at a jog. She didn’t bother checking to see if they were with her. She knew they would be. Kate gritted her teeth. Dogging her every move….
***
Bann waited outside the female’s accommodations. She’d been determined to find him…. Pleasure registered on his sensors. It was in conflict with his wishes but it still showed in the emotions part of his diagnostic. He wanted to spend time in her company?.... A list of logical responses flowed over his optic.
Facts were difficult to ignore. He heard her moving towards him some distance away. His pleasure zones lit up once more. His emotions were bleeding through the block. He knew what that meant. He would need to limit his involvement as much as possible or he risked making thing worse for both of them.
She entered the corridor and gazed right at him unwavering as she walked towards him. Her strut was filled with anger so was her scent. She was annoyed with him….. His systems flashed red. He didn’t like that he’d upset her. Her anger spilled over. She threw her arms in the air. “You left me to deal with this alone and set tick and tock on me?”
She advanced within arm’s length and stopped. He connected over his net to the warriors behind her. She will no longer need you. I will call when I leave.
Affirmative. They turned and left without making a sound.
His eyes cleared and he stared down at her. She waited. He was taking his sweet time…. “I had no choice. I’d been ordered to see the Admiral.”
“So that was more important that this?”
“The Admiral decides for all of us. So yes, what he decides determines what I do next.”
“He doesn’t decide for me and this, involves me.” He gave her that intense slow nod that made her insides go to jelly. No…. This time she was staying in control. “What did he say?”
“He told me to speak with you before I made any decisions.”
She hadn’t expected that. It took some of the wind out of her sails. “And if he hadn’t told you to do that?”
“I would have acted in my best interests.”
Kate clamped her teeth shut before she said something she couldn’t take back and opened her door walking in. Going to the replicator she made some coda and turned to find him still in the corridor. “You coming in or what?” she asked not bothering to try and keep the annoyance out of her voice. What would be the point? He could scent it anyway….. He stepped over the threshold and the door closed behind him. “Do you want a drink?” Bann gave a slight shake of the head and Kate sat at the table. That would be a no then….
He slowly came forward and took the chair opposite her.
Bann sat and looked at her. She showed every emotion of the struggle in her body and face. He didn’t need the scent to tell him. He’d pissed her off. Maybe he deserved it?....
Had she expected him to speak first? Clearly that wasn’t going to happen. “So you want to explain the leaving me to deal with this on my own?”
“I have already said, I had to see the Admiral.”
“Is this how Cyborg relationships work? I need to digest something this huge and you go off to work?”
Is this a Cyborg relationship?.... He didn’t have enough data to give her an answer. Several flowed across his optic. He’d never asked a mated Cyborg these questions. His data told him he’d had no reason to. It did tell him he could have asked the Admiral. He dismissed that immediately. No, that wouldn’t have been a good idea…. He was called Rage for a reason.
“I …. Do not know. I was unaware of your need to talk only that you rejected the information at the point Mac gave it to you.”
“I rejected shit actually. It was a shock to hear the ‘mated’ word. I just needed to get my head around it and like a normal human being, that meant talking to you, you’re the other person involved here.”
Bann wasn’t sure how this had become so messed up. “You cannot compare this to a human relationship. Cyborg relationships tend to be intense, consuming. How much that relates to this situation I do not know. I do not have enough data to go on.”
“Well it was consuming enough at the time!” She hated herself for loosing control and waited for him to say she’d made this happen, that he’d tried to warn her but, he didn’t.
“I was wrong not to discuss this with you more before our time together. I should have made things clearer. The rules are there for a reason. I knew it a possibility and did nothing and after, once Mac told us the likely outcome, I should have taken some time to talk to you first. The Admiral would have made his point clear anyway. I apologise if I have upset you. It was not my intension. I may not have acted more Cyborg in our time together, but I could have stopped it at any time and failed to do so. The burden of that is on me not you.”
Kate frowned; she wasn’t expecting that either. “Is that what you told the Admiral?”
“I did.”
Kate shook her head. “That isn’t true. You shouldn’t have taken the blame. It was me, all me.” She wiped a hand down her face, exasperated with herself. “I wish I had an answer for why I needed you so badly. I don’t.”
“Neither of us appear to.”
She looked up at him from her coda going cold. She didn’t really want it and wondered why she’d bothered. “You don’t either? I thought Mac had said it’s a mate thing, no choice?”
“She did, but that doesn’t mean I automatically accept it and nor should you.”
“I thought Cyborgs always accepted it?”
He gave her a slight shake of the head. “Not always, some Cyborgs are damaged, no longer able to bond with a human.”
“Are you damaged?” she asked hesitantly. Had she made things worse for him?.... Please say no….
“The evidence would suggest not as much as I thought.”
He sounded surprised. Kate realised she wasn’t the only one dealing with those. She tried not to smile. Had he just tried to make light of it?..... The reality was still sobering. “But you could die she said.”
Bann gave her a slow nod. He wouldn’t lie to her. “That is true. But we have a process now that can purge the DNA from our systems if it’s not wanted. It has had some success and I have asked for that.”
Kate felt sick to her stomach. “You asked to purge and wipe out my DNA?” she whispered. The scent of shock and a little fear filled the air around them. He’d upset her again……
“If I am to survive this there is little choice.”
Kate reared back from the table. “Survive me you mean.”
“It is the same.”
“No it isn’t,” she murmured looking away. “You want to wipe me out like it never happened.”
“Is that not what you want also. To go on and live your life as you wish too? Being with a Cyborg would compromise all that. Your choices would be more limited. I would try to give you freedom, but I’d want to be with you as much as possible. Caring for you, being in you. There is no choice in that once the bond takes hold and I’m imprinted on you. It will be worse for me if you change your mind later. Either way, wiping you from my memory is simply not possible. I remember everything. I will be able to recall every minute second of our time together for the rest of my life.”
Kate looked back at him. “Will you want to do that?”
His system only gave
him one answer. “Yes, I will.”
“Why? You don’t want it.” she told him sadly.
“Such pleasure is unknown to me. The intensity of the joining far beyond being ordered to fuck someone.”
Kate’s shock at hearing it voiced was genuine. “You were ordered to fuck women?”
He gave her a slight nod. “Not just women you should know that. When I was owned by Earth Corp, we were bought and sold like any other commodity.”
“And you still did it?”
“We were ordered. There was no refusing, not if you wanted to continue living and there was no choice offered in the programming anyway. We obeyed those orders. Our programming manipulated so we couldn’t say no and we were stimulated to be able to perform.”
“Are they dead? The one’s that did that to you?”
Bann smiled. Her body language told him she cared about justice being done. “They are long dead and Earth Corp is paying for every violation.”
“That’s good,” she muttered then glanced at him. “And you still want to terminate my link to you?”
“When Mac told you, your response was not good.”
Kate blinked and frowned. It wasn’t?.... “I’d just heard a load of stuff that scared the shit out of me. I wasn’t really thinking!” She was riled, he kept pushing her buttons.
“True but your first reaction was rejection. That says a lot. And my logic tells me that it may not be specifically directed at me, just the thought of being with anyone permanently makes you feel like that. It’s not something you want.”
“What about the mating bond? Doesn’t that override other feelings?” Was she defending this now?....
“Do you feel the mating bond?” Bann asked.
Kate sat in bewilderment. What was she doing?.... Did she feel the bond?... She had made a beeline for him as soon as she’d realised he wasn’t with her. The fact that he’d seemed to palm her off on some of his brothers had annoyed her too and that he’d left her to go do whatever, had pissed her off. She needed him then. Wanted him with her. Was that the bond?.... She had been desperate to see him…. Damn. She didn’t know…..
Bann got up from his seat. Talking further would not make any difference. The female was confused and agitated. He could scent and see it. He had no answers for her, but her feelings were transparent. She didn’t know and had to be sure. He didn’t need his logic to decipher what was going on for her, he could see it clearly.
“You need time and I have work to do. When you wish to speak again you can call me on the vid screen.”
Kate registered he was leaving. “What, you’re going again?”
“Nothing further can be accomplished at this time. The more I am in your company the more connected I become. That is more of a risk.”
He got as far as the door. “Why did you pick the name Bann?”
Bann stilled. He didn’t think on those days often. His data banks held plenty of memories just out of his optic. He didn’t want or need to see them.
“I was a favourite of some of the humans in the early days after my birthing and I wasn’t alone in that, there were plenty of us used as ‘pets’. But I didn’t know or understand that. I was yet to understand my place in that world. I thought the words genuine; my emotions were active and although we didn’t have the ability to bond at that time, those of us in that situation believed what we were told. When kind words became abusive, we accepted it. When kind actions became cruel, we took it. Only later, when the reality of the situation was clearly explained once we’d been discarded to move on, did we understand. We were then sold out to whoever. We were played with and were no longer wanted. Something new had caught their attention.
“After that, I joined my brothers on the front lines, but we never forget anything. It stayed with me. The orders mixed with my memories causing conflict with my emotions and I had to have them turned off to be able to function. First trained to see to my humans every need, then trained to kill them. The balance not easy to carry.
“Severing my pain receptors made that easier. And as a result, I chose not to mix with humans. I do not want to relive or rehash those memories. I banned myself from doing that. The name was the obvious choice.”
Kate hated to hear it. Her heart hurt for the young Cyborg and later the battered warrior. How cruel his world could be. And knew instinctively not all of it to be true. “Going on how amazing you were with me, I’m not sure that you did ban yourself from humans and what that brings to you. Maybe you just banned yourself from the possibility of repeating history.”
“The result is the same. No humans, no more memories.”
“No its not,” Kate frowned. “One you had no control over and no choice but to allow it to rule you, the other, you are in control and you choose.”
“And if the female does not want it? Who is in control then?” The door opened and he walked through. Kate stared after him, long after he’d turned the from the doorway into the corridor and the door had closed behind him. What indeed….
Chapter Four
This was bull…. She paced her room long after Bann had gone. If it hadn’t been for the ‘mate’ thing, she’d be pursuing him! Kate stopped. That was right….. She would be. She liked him. He was good to look at and all that muscle was drool worthy, and for all that Cyborgness…… was that a word? He was smart, fun, caring of her, considerate. He was into her too and the sex……. Off the charts! Had she had so much with any other guy?
Was she romancing it at bit?..... She didn’t do romance…..
Ok so she didn’t know him that well. She wasn’t sure if it was the Puma thing either. Or the heat thing or both. Bloody hell, she was a mess…. but she’d never been with someone who she’d not wanted….. And even with the shot, she’d still wanted him…..
Kate mulled that over. That shouldn’t have happened on its own…. No one had expected that. Including Mac the Doctor and according to Bann she was the best there was. Kate shouldn’t have wanted anyone on that and there it was. Being with him had set her on fire, the fizz was back and they’d only been having a drink. Was it the booze?.... No she couldn’t use that. She had a high threshold for alcohol, six was nothing. Was it the Puma thing?..... Natural attraction?.... Kate smiled. She liked the thought of that.
She remembered the drinking and chat, it had been easy, fun, then he’d smelt so good. Rich, sandalwood mixed with a little sweetness. She closed her eyes remembering the feeling. It had crept up on her from nowhere. Then heat had infused her along with her fizz explosion and an intense need to jump him consumed her. She couldn’t have stopped if she’d wanted to and she hadn’t wanted to stop. She’d wanted him.
Kate opened her eyes. Did it matter if it was the Puma thing or the mate thing?.... It was who she was, and she knew it now. All those years in the dark not knowing why she was doing things, had been a burden. The labelling, the names, they’d been hurtful and if she were honest, one of the reasons she’d left her home world in the first place. At least now she had some answers. That was a good thing right?......
Why did everything have to be so hard?..... She’d only ever wanted to belong. Had she finally found that?.... She’d been drawn to certain people on her own world of varying ages but mostly around her own and never sure why. She didn’t really know many of them. To understand and not be alone with that would be new. There were plenty of Puma based Cyborgs on the Station. They’d told her as much, and she’d seen those that thought she was a mate. They were connected to her by her DNA, just as Bann was….
Kate sat up. It suddenly hit her. Maybe she hadn’t been the only one affected by the infestation and treated in the same way!.... Maybe there were others like her. That fizz she felt in the back of her neck was the awareness of them. A bit like with Bann but nowhere near as intense. It certainly seemed right now she thought about it. She couldn’t have been the only one infected if it was such a large outbreak. “Computer contact Medical, I’d like to speak with Mac.”
“Affirm
ative.”
The more she thought about it while she waited, the more it made sense. There would be other humans on her world that had Puma blood.
The vid screen came online, Mac in the view. “Everything ok?”
Kate nodded quickly and moved towards the screen. “Had a thought. Been thinking a lot about all this. That infestation when I was a child, I wasn’t the only one affected. Thousands were and over the years, I’d be drawn to someone or other with my fizz going off but didn’t think much of it until now. I think there are a lot of others out there that were treated too. Which means….”
“There are a lot of Puma potential humans back on your home world.” Mac finished for her. Kate nodded eagerly. “I’ll let the Admiral know,” Mac told her. “It was a line of thinking I’d been considering myself but good to hear it from you so it confirms the possibility. I’ll get back to you on the details. How are you and Bann?”
“He’s determined to go through with the purge. Think’s I don’t want the mate thing or him or whatever this is.”
“He right?”
“That’s want I’ve been thinking on. I think he’s wrong, this is different to me but he’s not hearing it.”
“Then you need to change his mind.”
Kate frowned. “Yeah I’m not sure that’s going to happen.”
Mac laughed. “You’re female. Make it happen. Gotta go. I’ll be in touch.”
Kate nodded and the screen went blank. She had the chance of family here…. Maybe not on the human scale exactly but she was part animal too. Mac said make it happen…. The air had smelt so good on the Station. It had a land based freshness to it. Welcoming. Homely. Was that because she could scent the Puma in the air?.... Just thinking that seemed crazy but, if she was to embrace her Puma, she had to accept it was possible. She had the DNA, maybe she had some of the senses too….
BANN Explosive! Page 6