by Marie Sexton
He invites me over again two nights later, and we spend another night sittin’ on his livin’ room floor, watchin’ a movie and eatin’ takeout Thai food. When I leave I can’t help hopin’ he’ll ask me over again. Sure beats sittin’ at my place by myself.
Workin’ at A to Z is a trip. First, there’s the neighbors, crazy Ruby on one side and Jeremy on the other. Ruby told me my first week ’bout a vision she had of me tryin’ to choke a chicken.
Resisted the urge to make the stereotypical masturbation joke. Have a feelin’ she wouldn’t have laughed. Jeremy wants me to register as a Libertarian. He says Republicrats are the stooges of the corporate empire. Whatever the fuck that means. Nero Sensei keeps tryin’ to sell me supplements, and his students are always runnin’ ’round the parkin’ lot in their gis, kickin’ trees and yellin’ like banshees. Then there’s the customers. The guy in the Hawaiian shirts used to be a lawyer. Now he’s a bartender. He definitely shops at Jeremy’s shop on a regular basis, and he loves tearjerkers. He was embarrassed at first, but why should I care if the guy digs chick flicks? Justin only rents Heavy Metal. The movie’s not that good, and I can’t help but wonder why he doesn’t just buy a copy of the damn thing. And then there’s Carrie, the girl with the pierced lip. Would have figured her for a vampire freak. Turns out she plays cello and sings in her church choir. Loves musicals.
Never had so much fun at a job as I have with Zach. Look forward to seein’ him every day. I’m surprised how we seem to get along so easy. I feel bad for him, though, waitin’ ’round for that dickhead Tom. It’s clear as day that what Zach’s lookin’ for is a real relationship. It’s equally fuckin’ obvious that Tom isn’t interested in anything of the sort. Zach’s always countin’ the hours ’til he gets to see Tom again. Tom cancels at least half the time and shows up late the other half.
’Course who am I to talk? Like I said, I don’t do relationships.
Still, I don’t think my way is quite so despicable. I would have shown Zach a good time and then never seen him again. I wouldn’t have pretended to date him and strung him along like Tom’s doin’.
It’s the dishonesty that makes it so disgustin’. Got to remember, though, that it’s none of my business.
Couple weeks later Zach calls and asks me to open without him. Says he’s runnin’ late. That’s not just a phrase for Zach. He actually runs every mornin’. Sometimes a mile, sometimes a few. I don’t get it. Runnin’ isn’t my idea of fun. But it does explain why he still looks so great. Anyway he was runnin’ late and then still wanted to shower, too, before comin’ in. I told him to take his time.
Wednesday mornin’: no reason for us both to be there.
That’s why I’m alone in the store when Tom comes in.
I gotta be honest. Tom creeps me out. Not sure I can explain it.
Maybe ’cause big jocks like him made my teenage years hell.
Maybe ’cause a jock like him tried to rape me four years ago. That guy gave off the same bad vibes I get from Tom. I been pretty happy he never noticed me. ’Til today.
He looks around the store, obviously lookin’ for Zach, but sees me instead. Then his eyes change. Can’t explain it no better than that. Gives me chills.
“Hey,” he says. He walks over to me, where I’m rearrangin’ movies on the shelves in the corner. “Zach here?”
“Nope.” I don’t look at him. Just keep doin’ what I’m doin’.
“I’ll tell him you stopped by.”
’Course I’m hopin’ he’ll be happy with that answer and be on his merry fuckin’ way. But I know right away it’s not gonna work.
He’s still standin’ there, lookin’ at me, and when I glance over, I see a little smirk on his face that makes my pulse kick into overdrive.
Not in a good way. Worst part is, he’s got me blocked in the corner.
“Zach must be smarter than I thought,” he says suddenly, “keeping a pretty little thing like you around.” I’m not sure which part of that comment annoys me more—bein’ called a “pretty little thing,” or hearin’ him imply that Zach’s stupid. “Tell me. Does he let you fuck him, or is it always the other way around?”
“Not like that,” I say. I’m weighin’ my options. I’m not afraid of him. I learned a long time ago how to fight big guys like him.
Question is, how much trouble will it cause afterward? Just have to bide my time, play it cool, hope nothin’ happens before Zach shows up.
“You expect me to believe that Zach keeps you around for your excellent organizational skills?” he asks sarcastically.
I shrug. “Have to ask him.”
He moves closer. I don’t back away. Not gonna give him the satisfaction of seein’ me back down. “Come on now,” he says seductively. “Let’s play nice. I bet you’re worth the effort. Why don’t you give me a little of what you’ve been giving him? I’ll even make it fun for you.”
“Not givin’ him anything. Not givin’ you anything either.”
“You don’t have to keep denying it. I don’t mind that he’s got a little action on the side.”
“You’re delusional.”
He laughs, like it’s all a game. Guess maybe it is—to him.
Then he reaches up and tries to brush my hair out of my face. I move before I even decide to, knock his hand away, and turn to face him. “Don’t you fuckin’ touch me!”
His eyes get darker, scarier, and he says in a low voice, “Be careful, pretty boy.” It’s obviously a warnin’.
I refuse to be intimidated by him. I keep my eyes on his, keep my voice quiet and even. “Or what?”
“Maybe I’ll tell Zach that his little pet offered me a blow job in exchange for some extra cash. I don’t mind sharing him, but somehow, I doubt he feels the same way about sharing me.”
I’m tempted to call his bluff. Zach would never believe him anyway. But right then Zach walks in. And I hate how he looks so happy to see Tom.
’Course Tom’s good at what he does. He immediately steps back, away from me, and he’s got a smile plastered on his face before he turns ’round to face Zach.
“Hey, baby,” he says, “I was waiting for you.” He walks over to Zach and starts to reach for him.
I can’t fuckin’ watch this.
“Zach, I’ll be back in twenty,” I say.
I don’t even look over. Just put my head down and head for the door. I know Zach won’t object, though, and sure enough, I hear him say, “No problem,” just as I’m walkin’ out the door.
Don’t even know where I’m goin’. Just had to get out of there.
Can’t decide if I should try to tell Zach ’bout Tom or not. First, I think I should. I’m his friend. That’s my job, right?
But the more I think about it, the more I realize it’s a stupid fuckin’ idea. Zach’s a big boy. It’s his business. What am I gonna say, anyway? “Your big jock boyfriend creeps me out?” Maybe
“Tom hit on me.” No. If I tell him, it will just put him in the bad position of havin’ to choose between me and Tom. I don’t want to do that to him. Despite what Tom thinks, Zach isn’t stupid. Clueless and naïve, maybe, but that’s not the same thing. At some point he’s gonna figure out Tom’s a dickhead. No need to ruin our friendship in the meantime.
Zach…
I was pleasantly surprised to see Tom when I came into the store.
“Hey, baby. I was waiting for you.” There was an extra button undone on his shirt today, and I couldn’t keep my eyes off of that little triangle of skin and the curly hairs there. He walked over to me and started to reach for me.
“Zach, I’ll be back in twenty,” Angelo suddenly said.
I assumed he was just trying to give Tom and me some privacy, although there was something weird in his voice. He wasn’t looking at me, though, and he was out the door before I could say more than, “No problem.”
“You should fire that punk before he robs you blind,” Tom said as soon as Angelo was gone.
I bristled at th
at. I wasn’t sure when I had stopped thinking of Angelo as a punk, but it definitely annoyed me to hear Tom talk about him that way. “Angelo would never steal from me,” I said with conviction. “I trust him unequivocally.”
That answer obviously didn’t please him, but he shrugged and then gave me that incredible, sexy smile. “I’m sorry I haven’t been around. We’ve been so busy.” He put his arm around my waist and pulled me against him. “I’ve missed you, though.” That low seductive voice—just hearing it made me hard. He kissed my neck, and I relaxed against him. “Do you forgive me?”
“Of course.”
“Good.” He kissed me, his mouth soft but insistent, took my hand, and led me to the office. He opened the door and pushed me through, closed it behind us, and then he was all over me. He pushed me up against the wall and kissed me hard. His hands were squeezing my ass again.
“I don’t have much time,” he said breathlessly in my ear, “but I really wanted to see you. I’ve missed you so much.” He kissed me again and ground his crotch against mine, and then he pulled back to brush his thumb over my mouth. I put my tongue out and licked it.
His eyes went a little wide, and he breathed, “God, I love your mouth.”
I smiled at him. “How much time do you have?”
“A few minutes.”
“It’ll be enough.” I turned us around so that he was against the wall. I kissed him again as I undid his pants and then dropped to my knees in front of him. I pulled his briefs down and licked the head of his cock.
“Oh yeah, baby, that’s right,” he murmured huskily. “I need it bad.”
I took him in my mouth as deep as I could. I had never mastered the art of swallowing somebody all the way, so I used my hand on the lower part of his shaft. “Oh God, that’s good,” he said. I sped up. I grabbed his balls with my other hand, squeezed them gently. I worked my tongue over his slit whenever I reached the top of his cock.
“Oh, baby, that’s it.” His hips were starting to thrust in and out, and one of his hands grabbed the back of my head. “That’s so nice. Your mouth is so hot. I’m close already. Just a little more.”
My own erection felt like it was pulsing in time with his thrusts. I would have used my hand on it, except I didn’t want a huge wet stain on the front of my pants for the rest of the day. I sped up and hoped he was planning to return the favor when I was finished. “Oh God, Zach. A little more. Just a little more.” His fingers clenched in my hair, and that was all it took.
When he was done, I stood up and kissed him. “Baby, that was so good,” he said as I pulled back. He grabbed my ass again and pulled me against him as one of his hands groped my crotch. I moaned and leaned into him. “I’m sorry I don’t have time to take care of you right now.” He kissed me again. “Can I make it up to you later?”
I was so horny at that point that it really wouldn’t have taken him more than a minute or two to bring me off, but I nodded.
“Sure.”
“I’ll pick you up at six.”
He left. My erection didn’t. I knew I’d be tense and cranky all afternoon. I ended up jacking off in the bathroom. It felt terribly adolescent, but at least it relieved some of the pressure.
Angelo came back ten minutes later, and Nero Sensei was right behind him holding a giant box full of broken boards.
“Hey, Zach. I brought you some firewood.”
Never mind that it was July, and that I had told him a hundred times that my apartment didn’t have a fireplace. Nero’s students were constantly breaking boards, and he was desperate to find something to do with the left over pieces.
“Thanks, Sensei. You can just leave them by the door.”
Angelo turned to me once Nero had left. “What you gonna do with all that wood?”
“Drop it in the dumpster tomorrow morning, before Sensei gets here.” What the hell else could I do?
“Look on the bright side,” Angelo said with a smile. “If we’re ever attacked by an army of boards, Sensei’s students will save the day.”
I laughed as Nero passed by again, on his way to Jeremy’s door with another box. Jeremy would probably try to lecture him on how government interference in the free market was to blame for the plummeting value of broken boards.
At about two Jimmy Buffett stopped in.
Angelo surprised me by calling out, “Hey Mr. D.”
“What do you have for me today, Angelo?”
Angelo pulled a DVD out from under the counter. “An Affair to Remember.” He held it out. “You seen it?”
Jimmy Buffett, a.k.a. Mr. D, shook his head, smiling. “No. You think I’ll like it?”
Angelo smiled back at him. “Guaranteed.” Jimmy rented the movie, thanked Angelo, and left.
Angelo turned to me, and the look on my face made him ask jokingly, “What’s your problem?”
“‘Mr. D’?” I asked him.
He shrugged. “Yeah, why not?”
“That’s his name?”
Ang shook his head at me. “Seriously, Zach. You gotta know your regulars. His name’s Drew Davis. He digs chick flicks.”
Which explained why he always seemed embarrassed. Of course I hadn’t ever paid attention to what he rented. “What about Goth Girl?” I asked Angelo.
“Carrie. She only rents musicals.” He gave me his lopsided smirk. “Honestly, Zach, don’t know how you survived without me.”
I wasn’t sure either. I felt like it was some kind of divine providence that had prompted me to hire him. But I was saved from answering by Ruby, who came through the door and promptly proclaimed, “Zach, I’ve had another vision.”
“Really?” I asked. A glance at Angelo showed him looking amused and curious.
“Yes. A lady in a big green dress brought you a bowl of ice cream. She said, ‘Before it melts, Zach. Because I’m crazy about you’.”
“A lady in a big green dress is crazy about me?” I asked.
Angelo was grinning from ear to ear.
Ruby shrugged. “I don’t interpret the visions, dear. I only receive them.”
Jeremy came in at four to see if we needed more pamphlets.
He was obviously disappointed in how many were still sitting on my counter.
“I just can’t understand why more people aren’t interested in promoting real change in Washington,” he said to me.
“I’m not sure, either, Jeremy,” I said, trying to sound sympathetic.
“Do you realize the federal income tax isn’t even legal, Zach?
The sixteenth amendment was never properly ratified by the state legislature. The whole thing is a scam—a scam to cheat us out of our hard-earned money.”
“Is that right?”
“It is. The Federal Reserve has taken over this country, Zach.
There would be riots in the streets if people understood what that meant.”
“Riots?” I couldn’t hide my skepticism.
“I’m not kidding, Zach.” And he did indeed look quite serious.
“There’s a movie,” he said, and Angelo suddenly looked interested, “called Freedom to Fascism. Do you have that movie here? Have you seen it?”
I had to look at Angelo. “Do we have that movie?”
“No,” he said. He was scribbling on a piece of paper and didn’t even look up. “I can order it, though.”
I turned back to Jeremy. “I have a feeling I’ll see it before the end of the month.”
He shook his head at me sadly. “I hope so, Zach. Ignorance may be bliss, but it’s also no excuse.”
At five, Tom called to cancel. He said he had another meeting.
It was always a meeting.
“So I won’t see you tonight after all?” I couldn’t keep the annoyance out of my voice.
“I’m sorry, baby. I’ll make it up to you. I promise.”
“Whatever.”
“Please don’t be mad. Listen, I have to go. I’ll call you soon.”
I almost told him not to bother, but the line went
dead before I had the chance. I hung up the phone and wondered what I would do now that my plans had fallen through.
“Let me guess.” I looked over to see Angelo watching me from the other side of the counter. “Dickhead ditched you again, right?”
“Fuck off, Angelo.”
He was quiet for a minute, and then he said, “Sorry, man. I just don’t get why you let him treat you like that.”
I was starting to wonder the same thing. And now I was facing another night alone in my apartment. A whole night to think about the date that should have been. “You want to come over tonight?” I asked Angelo.
“Dickhead ditches you, and I’m your back up plan?”
When he said it that way, I really felt like an ass. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Yeah.”
“Yeah, what?”
“Yeah, I want to come over tonight.”
I found myself smiling at him. “Do I get to pick the movie?”
“You gonna pick somethin’ with Molly Ringwald?”
“Maybe.”
He smiled at me. “No way, Zach. You pick dinner; I’ll pick the movie.”
We got back to my house, and Angelo got a beer out of the fridge while I ordered a pizza. I found him sitting at the dining room table, working on the puzzle. I sat down opposite him, and we worked in companionable silence for a while. It surprised me how much more fun it was working the puzzle, just having him there with me.
“What movie did you bring?” I finally asked him.
“Aliens.” He looked up at me with his lopsided smile.
“Violence and mayhem. Nothin’ better.”
I laughed and was just looking back down at the puzzle when I spotted something above the edge of the table—something soft and gray sticking up from his lap, like a hairy flag. Or a cat tail.
“Is that Geisha?” I asked in surprise.
“If Geisha’s a cat, then yeah,” he said, without looking up from the puzzle.
“She’s in your lap?”