by Raven Scott
“As you may have already figured out, my dad is a huge asshole. The good thing is, if he doesn’t like you, you’ll know it right away. The better thing is that if he doesn’t like you, everyone else will be more inclined to want to like you.” Natasha barked a laugh at my declaration, and I scratched my goatee absently as we walked up the lip of the driveway. There wasn’t much more of a warning I could give her when a car pulled up beside us, and I paused as Mary rolled down the window to smile at me brightly. “Hey, Mary, congratulations on shortening your leash.”
“I almost didn’t recognize you with such a pretty girl on your arm. Your big head gave you away, though.” Swiping out at her with a chuckle, I tightened my grip on Natasha’s hand as she practically hid behind me. Mary’s bouncy, blonde hair shimmered in the strong sunlight of the south, and she leaned over the center console even more. “Hey, Jason came here early, but I had to get the kids from after-school. You want a ride down?”
“Ah, no, thanks. It’s been months since I saw the sun. You know, it’s like thirty degrees in New York right now.” Understanding flooded my sister-in-law’s face as she craned her neck, and I gestured down the driveway. “Good luck with parking.”
“Yeah, right. I’ll just park on the lawn. I don’t care.” She waved a manicured hand before taking off, and I chuffed a laugh as I shook my head. Mary was a firecracker, and I tangled my fingers between Natasha’s as we continued to walk. In New York, it hadn’t snowed until after Christmas, and the cold still blocked out the sun even though it was nearly Spring.
“You said she was a war reporter and that’s how she met your brother, right?” The question kinda threw me, and I cast Natasha a curious glance as she gnawed on her lower lip. “Do . . . do you think she’d be open to talking to me? About war, and who gets caught in the middle.”
“I’m sure she’d be delighted, but you really have to ask her, Natasha.” We were nearly the end of the driveway, and cars sparkled as their shiny paints and edges reflected the sun. The house itself rose up modestly from behind a plain, short fence, but it was behind the structure where the party was. As promised, Mary was parked on the lawn, digging into her trunk, and I tugged Natasha over. “Mary, hey, you need any help?”
“Uh, no. I got it.” Casting her a look, I pursed my lips thinly, and my sister-in-law’s baby blue eyes flickered to Natasha. “But I don’t want to make two trips. There’s a ton of shit in here since Jason ran away before I could pile it on him. Go ahead.”
Releasing Natasha’s hand, I reached into the trunk to grab the cooler, and it was surprisingly heavy.
“What the fuck is in here? Bodies?” Mary scowled as I jostled the rather large, plastic box, and I winced when it tilted hard to the side. “What the shit, Mary?”
“There’s ice and meat in there. Like I said, I couldn’t dump it on Jason. You offered, Erik. Just go . . . go away.” Shooing me off, Mary grabbed two cases of beer, and Natasha grabbed a third, before she used her foot sensor to shut the trunk of her SUV. “You know, you really lucked out. These guys, they know how to avoid deadly situations. What’s your name? Big Head didn’t introduce us. I’m Mary, his sister-in-law.”
Rolling my eyes, I strode for the side of the house and left them to talk. Natasha needed at least one friend, and no one was a better friend than Mary. Music pumped through the air, and I bopped my head to the faint twang of country as it covered the conversations going on.
The back yard, which was really a field, had been decorated to a point with balloons and chairs and games. Tables upon tables of food to feed the fifty-odd people were scattered around, and I skirted the back patio to drop my burden by the grill. My dad had a whole setup, complete with a sink, for some reason, and I set the cooler by the others hiding behind the counter.
“Erik! Hey!” My head snapped up, and I grinned as Jason slid over the counter to grapple me into a hug. Patting his back hard, I closed my eyes to relish the feel of him. We didn’t always have the best relationship, but now that we were in our thirties, it was always a pleasure to see him. Pulling back to hold my shoulders, Jason shook me a little and I shrugged him off before sighing heavily. “What’s up with you, man? You look good. New York must not be treating you as bad as you bitch about.”
“No, it’s that bad. My rental from the precinct is up before the end of the month, and I’m not going back. Screw that shit.” Jason’s eyes bored into mine as they narrowed, and I frowned when he clapped a solemn hand on my shoulder. “What?”
“I know this is going to be hard for you to hear, Erik, but . . . ” Alarm bells rang in my head, and Jason gave a soft sigh and slight shake of his head. “You’re a fucking idiot.”
“Hey! I’ll kick your ass!” Pushing him a little harder than necessary, I grinned when he barely managed to avoid tripping over a cooler and landing on his ass. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Natasha and Mary appear out from the side of the house, and I lost all interest in my brother. She looked so . . . so . . .
“Is that your girlfriend?” Nodding absently, I stroked my beard as Natasha laughed at something Mary said, and heat flooded my veins. “She’s got some demons, huh. You can tell just glancing at her.”
“She’ll be alright. You know, Jason, it’s like all the shit I went through was to help with her, almost.” There was no point in lying to Jason, and I rubbed my neck and shoulder as he grunted softly in acknowledgment. “It’s tough— tougher than anything I’ve ever voluntarily put myself through.”
“I’m sure it is.” Natasha was introduced to Mary’s kids before people started to notice her, and I inhaled sharply as I stepped away only to get grabbed by Jason. My brother frowned, shaking his head, and my lips thinned as I turned back to Natasha. Mary, I knew she could hold her own. She’d been doing it for almost fifteen years. But . . .
“She’s doing okay, or doing a really good job hiding how nervous she is.” Jason was a self-proclaimed expert in human behavior, and, I mean, he’d spent enough time figuring out why monsters were monsters and how they became that way. Natasha shook one of my aunt’s hand, and Jason grumbled deep in his chest. “She was . . . ”
“Don’t, Jason.” If they weren’t already, my brother’s suspicions were confirmed when Natasha left my Uncle Jay hanging, refusing to shake his hand as she hid hers behind her back. “I’m sure it won’t take you long to figure it out.”
31
Erik
“Natasha.” Sitting under the tree next to her, I settled down and stretched my legs as she sipped her Twisted Tea leisurely. “Not so bad, right? We got pretty lucky, Mike’s not here yet.”
“They’re very nice. Are things gonna get awkward around Mike?” Lifting my beer to my lips as she posed her question, I shrugged slightly. It was always a toss-up whether or not shit would go down. “You said no one likes him.”
“Sometimes, there’s drama. Other times, there’s not really much to say. I mean, my siblings and I don’t like him, but everyone else is pretty okay with him. I honestly don’t know why it’s just us who gets this unease around him.” There was no other way to explain it, and Natasha hummed against the lip of her bottle as I gazed out into the backyard. Jason and Cathy were playing a game of cornhole, and my dad was getting ready to fire up the grill. We’d been here less than half an hour, but I knew I’d dodged a bullet.
If we got here after Mike and my Aunt Kathy, who knows what kind of vibes would be going around right now.
“It must be nice, living in such a big family, having so many people you can rely on. Mary is really nice.” That was the third time in about as many seconds that Natasha said ‘nice’, and I nodded quietly as she twirled her bottle between her palms. “I thought I’d be swamped with questions and stuff.”
“My mom’s probably dying inside to know more about you, but she’s the kind to ask in private, or at least not in front of fifty people.” Smiling slightly, I scanned the yard for my mom, her greys shimmering brightly in the mid-day sun. She kept looking over desp
ite her conversation, and I rubbed my head absently as a sigh escaped me. “I’ve never brought a woman home before, but she’s probably the only one that cares too much.”
“Every man here was in the military?” Nodding firmly, my cheeks crested in a smile, and Natasha smiled back as an ease settled on her face that I hadn’t seen before. “That’s kinda amazing, you know.”
“It is. I went into the SEALs, but Jason is in the Army Reserves, and there’s a few Airforce pilots and whatnot. All different branches. As long as you go in somehow. It doesn’t matter if you do your four or you do twenty-five, you gotta go in. Otherwise, you’ll get shit on for the rest of your life.” She huffed a quiet laugh, and I took another swig of my beer before continuing. “Are you having an alright time?”
“I’m okay. I’m a little out of my element, but what can you realistically expect?” The bark against my back dug into my shoulders as I slumped a little, and Natasha made this noise of content as her fingers crept over my own on the grass. “I knew I wouldn’t pass the tests, but if I could’ve, I would’ve gone into the military just because the schooling, the healthcare, all that stuff.”
“Yeah, they’re really strict about the psychological test. Have you ever shot a gun besides that one time?” She shook her head, and I tilted mine back quizzically. “Wanna try it?”
“Um, I don’t think that’s a good idea. There’s a lot of people around.”
“Nah, we have a range thing set up in the back. Kids aren’t allowed back there. Let’s go.” Pushing myself up, I tugged Natasha’s hand, and she didn’t protest as excitement threaded my veins. “What kind of gun was it?”
“I don’t know? A small one?” It was probably a pistol. If I was going to execute someone, it’d be with a pistol. They were easier to handle. Nodding, I scanned the yard for Cathy and Mark, and I left Natasha to go walk over to a table piled with junk food.
“Hey, you guys wanna go do some shooting?” I tried not to ask too loudly, but Jason heard from twenty feet away, and he practically knocked me over in his haste to get in on this. Cathy nodded eagerly, and Mark kinda shrugged, but he wasn’t a big gun fan— he preferred martial arts. “Awesome, let’s go.”
“Dad! Dad! Can I come? Just to watch?” Bryan bounced around with excitement, but Jason was already shaking his head, and the kid pouted hard.
“No, you know you can’t until you’re sixteen, Bryan. Them's the rules. Go ahead, try to complain to your mom. I dare you.” Bryan was thirteen, the oldest, and he didn’t even bother to protest as he slunk off, scuffing his shoes against the grass. Jason rolled his eyes and sighed heavily, and Natasha appeared behind my arm as my brother spoke up. “That kid’s way too eager. Mary and I are talking about sending him to that camp you went to, Erik, just to beat it out of him.”
“I don’t know if that’s the best idea. That place only made me want to serve more because I knew I could.” Jason waved me off, and we started heading toward the barn at the back of the property in a group. “Now that you’re here for good, why don’t you just do it yourself?”
“What? You mean actually discipline my kid? What a concept.” Natasha popped up on my other side, away from everyone else, and I scowled darkly even as I took her hand. Jason glared at me weakly, but he shrugged it off after a second. “Bryan’s not a troubled kid, so there’s no need for that. He just . . . doesn’t understand the weight. He thinks it’s all glitz and greatness, and the video games— man, I fucking hate the video games.”
“You can’t be that upset. He idolizes his father, Jason. Bryan’s fourteen— he’s interested in that shit.” Speaking up on my side, Cathy ignored Jason’s disgruntled snort, and I pulled open the barn door. Everyone shuffled in but Natasha, talking amongst themselves, and she squeezed my hand hard with a deep breath. My cautious curiosity muted by the determination in her eyes, and I smiled encouragingly.
We had a lot of guns in this family. There were plenty of options that weren’t a pistol.
“You ever shot a gun, Natasha?” Cathy turned on the floodlights to illuminate the cases, and Natasha tensed next to me. There were at least twenty pieces, some of them with historical significance and others who were for shooting fun. I popped the top of the one closest to me. “What are you getting that one out for? She’s never shot a gun. Look at her.”
“Do you need to leave, Cathy?” Picking up a pretty stable rifle, I shot my sister a nasty glare, and she huffed indignantly as she crossed her arms. Her short, brown hair tied tight in a bun, every part of her screaming ‘I just got back’— pure aggression— but I really had no time for her know-it-all attitude. “That’s what I thought.”
“She’ll be fine with this, Cathy. Stop trying to steal Erik’s girlfriend.” Our sister tensed, anger flaring in her eyes as embarrassment flooded her cheeks, and I couldn’t help but laugh. Her brief stint exploring her sexuality was hilarious in the extreme, and she clenched her hands tightly by her sides as Jason flung an arm over her shoulders. “Relax. I was hoping you’d be less of a bitch right now considering you just got back, but obviously, I was wrong.”
“I’ll fucking kick your ass—" He held up his hand to silence her, and Cathy stormed out of the barn with a shriek of frustration. For a moment, there was silence, and Mark spoke up for the first time, his voice level and thoughtful as always.
“Why do you do that, Jason? You two are gonna get into a fight at some point, and who knows? Maybe, she will kick your ass. You’re a pencil pusher now, remember.” Jason’s shit-eating grin was all the answer he needed, and Mark sighed before turning to Natasha to nod politely. “We haven’t been introduced, yet. I’m Mark, Erik’s second eldest brother.”
Mark didn’t try to extend his hand. He must’ve been watching when Natasha only shook the girls’ hands. She gave a little wave, and I cleared my throat roughly as I adjusted my grip on the rifle and turned to her.
“Ready to learn to handle this?”
32
Natasha
“I . . . I hit it.” My breathless whisper nearly knocked me off my feet, and my lips quirked up. Heat slithered up my neck, and my sternum tingled as icy prickles swept in waves down my torso. “I hit it.”
“You did on your first try, too.” The bang of the shot still rang in my ears as I turned to Erik, and he smiled encouragingly. “Try again.”
“Uh, um, n-no. I’ll be one-zero. It’ll be fantastic.” I held out the gun, and Erik nodded with a grin as he took it. Rubbing my hands on my jeans, I inhaled sharply, and the smell of barn wood flooded my lungs. My gut tightened, and I stepped back from the huge barn doors as he shouldered the strap. “It wasn’t as . . . jarring as I expected.”
“The person you shot, did he deserve it?” The question struck me hard, and I turned to Jason as he locked eyes with me. “You never said you didn’t, that’s why I made Cathy leave. If she knew, she’d report you. Cathy’s not a soldier— she just wants to be special, and reporting is the ‘right’ thing to do.”
“It was my mom.” Like Erik, Jason’s cheek twitched, his eyes narrowed, his shoulders tensing. He seemed to grow physically in realization and anger. Scrunching up my nose, I sucked my teeth, and Erik took my hand to rub with his thumb. “She did. Why do you say she’s not a soldier?”
“I mean, she has the title. She’s a soldier in the sense that she’s got the job,but she’s doing it for glory, not for the regular reasons— patriotism, family, free fucking college and job opportunity. Cathy does it to make herself special, to do something very few other women can or want to do. She likes being the good one.”
“She’s not the good one. I’m good.” My eyes narrowed into slits, and my lip curled as I clenched my fists by my sides. Jason stiffened, and I pointed my finger in his face as a hard shiver lodged between my shoulder blades. “I’m good.”
“Natasha.” A huge hand wrapped around mine, and I blinked hard, and a horrified gasp breached my teeth. Stepping back, I tore my eyes off Jason to glare at the barn floor, and sile
nce rang in my ears. “Take a breath. It’s okay.”
“I’m okay. I’m sorry, I . . . ” My teeth clicked together hard when I closed my mouth, and I shuttered my eyelids tight to take a deep, calming breath. Rolling my head and shoulders, I exhaled a shuddering sigh, and Jason and Mark both watched me with the same, critical brown eyes. “I’m fine. Just . . . don’t say that, please.”
“Mmm.” Jason hummed softly and I forced my eyes open even as colorful spots assaulted their edges. “I apologize. How about we get back to the party? I could use a beer.”
“You and your sister were on the news.” Speaking up quickly, Mark nodded to himself as his older brother took his gun, and my expression soured darkly. “That’s where I remember you from.”
“You’re probably the only twenty-two-year-old in the world who religiously watches nationwide news on individual outlets online, Mark.” Squeezing my hand comfortingly, Erik, his brother, and I walked back to the gun cases so he could put away the rifle. “Anyway, this conversation is over. We’re not talking about it anymore.”
“I guess it’s not something to dredge up from over ten years ago. I mean, I work for intelligence. I can’t help being good with faces.” My brows rose at that, and Mark shot me a sly smile as he rubbed his buzzed head free of dust from the barn. “I’m almost positive no one else will recognize you. It was a lot time ago.”
His attempt to reassure me was endearing, and I simply nodded as the pressure eased off my chest. Rubbing the spot with the butt of my palm, I gulped down the tightness in my throat, and we left the barn to be engulfed in unfiltered, cloudless sunshine. Gazing out at the beautiful landscape, I couldn’t help but be struck by how quaint everything seemed. I’d never been on a farm, and I’d stuck to mid-sized cities that wouldn’t remind me of Dallas.