by Mari Thorne
Alan laughed and patted me on the shoulder, "Keep dreaming, man. Just don't kill grandma with your truth bomb."
“You don't think—”
"I'm joking. That old bat will outlive all of us."
“Don't scare me like that.” I grabbed two mimosas and joined Sean.
My mom came by a few minutes later after checking on the turkey. "It'll be ready soon, and all the other sides are ready. Isn't it great to have all these kids running around? They add so much energy to a home. Have you thought about settling down? What about you, Sean? Do you have someone special in your life?"
Sean took a sip of his mimosa and grinned at her, "I do."
"That's great! You should convince Alan to take a girl seriously. I swear, it's like a revolving door with him. What's wrong with these girls, he's a catch, don't they see that?"
"Maybe they realized they weren't his type," Sean smiled slyly over his glass.
She shook her head in mock disappointment. "Well, he needs to stop being so picky or he’ll end up alone forever!"
"Nah, I'll never be alone as long as I've got Sean," I butted in, putting my arm around his shoulders. Not in a romantic way, more brotherly. He leaned into it and I gave him a squeeze. "He's always there for me when I need him."
She pursed her lips and her brow furrowed as she looked at us. "Friendships are important, but you still need more than that in life. Like love and companionship. Someone who will commit themselves to you wholly and vow to always be by your side no matter what."
Sean and I looked at each other, our eyes meeting. The look in those gorgeous brown eyes of his said everything it needed to say. Yes, my mom was speaking the truth, one hundred percent, she just didn't realize I'd already found that.
"Eva, the rolls!" My grandma called, and my mom bustled off to the kitchen. I pulled Sean closer before dropping my hand. I wanted to grab his hand in mine, I wanted to kiss him on the cheek, I wanted to do many things to him. He gave me a look of understanding and took a step back. All in due time.
Our family was too big to go around the table and say what we were thankful for. The food would get cold before we finished. We had two tables crammed into the dining room, plus a small one in the kitchen for the kids. Andy sat at that one to make sure the kids didn't throw food all over my mom's rug. My mom lined the dishes up in the kitchen and everyone grabbed a plate and filed through, loading up on turkey and ham and stuffing and potatoes and cranberry sauce. I slathered everything in gravy and topped it with a fresh-baked roll, like a cherry on top of a savory sundae.
Sean sampled a little of everything, following me through the line and sitting next to me at the table. Some families made place settings and name cards for their holiday dinners, but we all just kind of sat wherever. Lou picked my other side, his game put away for the moment, buried in his phone instead.
"You wanna put that away for a few minutes?"
He looked at me like I'd asked him to throw his phone down the garbage disposal, lip quivering in disgust. "Who are you, the screen police?"
Sean put a hand on my knee, "It's his life, he can do whatever he wants."
"Yeah but it’s—nevermind, you're right." We ate, we chatted with our family, and Lou eventually put his phone down when he needed two hands to cut his ham. When we'd stuffed ourselves so much that we couldn't eat anymore, we got dessert. I got a slice of homemade pumpkin pie with fresh whipped cream and grabbed Sean a slice of cherry, his favorite.
"I can't move," my mom leaned back in her chair and rubbed her belly.
"We can take care of the dishes," Sean volunteered, moving to get up. I put a hand on his thigh and he looked at me and sat back down.
"The dishes can wait," I said. "We've got time before we have to go to your parents' for dinner."
My mom shook her head, “I’m confused. I thought, if Sean was coming here for lunch, his family wasn't doing dinner. But they are, and you're going too?”
"Oh, this is gonna be good," Lou muttered under his breath, eyes back on his phone.
I took a deep inhale and exhale before leveling a serious gaze on her. I wanted her to know this was no joke. “Mom, this might be a shock for you to hear, but Sean and I, we're dating.”
The entire room grew silent.
My mom shook her head, “Shocking, sure that's a word for it. I mean, you two have been joined at the hip for so long it kind of makes sense, but honey, you've only ever dated women. I don’t get it. You’re straight. Right?”
I shrugged, “I guess I’m bi since now I'm dating a man. Sean and I have been together through so much, and all that stuff you said about companionship and commitment, we have that. I love him.”
Sean let out a gasp next to me and I turned, grabbing his hands in mine. "I love you, Sean."
"I love you too," he whispered, and my heart filled with so much warmth and relief that I kissed him right there in front of my entire family.
I chanced a glance at my mom, and tears were in her eyes, dripping down her cheeks. "Oh, mom, I'm sorry if I disappointed you."
She shook her head and wiped at her eyes. "I'm not crying because I'm sad. It's just—you look so much like your dad. You know that, we've always said it, but the way you look at Sean, it's how he used to look at me. I'm glad you found someone to love who loves you back." She smiled and excused herself from the table, running off to the bathroom.
"Dude, you made my mom cry," I teased Sean.
"You should go check on her," he said. "I'll help with the dishes."
I nodded and found her in the master bathroom, washing her face. "Sorry to spring it on you like that, mom. Are we okay, though?"
"Your dad wouldn't have approved," she sighed. "Your dad was a lot of things to this family, but he was closed-minded about stuff like this."
"What about you?"
She laughed, "Alan, I just want you to be happy. If I've learned anything over these last few years, it's that life is too short to care about what other people think. Sean makes you happy, I can see that. And if you're happy, I'm happy. And if anyone else sees any differently, well they can fuck off."
It was my turn to cry. Relief filled my chest, and I pulled her into a deep hug and sniffed, squeezing her tight. "I'm so glad you see things that way. I really love him, we're so good together and he makes me a better person. A happier person. I'm sure dad would have hated seeing us together, but I have faith that deep down, we could have changed his mind."
She squeezed me back and said, “If anyone could, it would have been you.”
15
Sean
My heart was fucking singing. I didn't know how good it would feel to have Alan tell me he loved me. And he'd told it to everyone, and he'd kissed me in front of his entire family. It was so real now, a dream that I could never ever let myself wake up from. Because that's what it had to be, right? A dream? Because there was no way this was real. I scrubbed a pan and thought about every unreal thing that had happened over the past few weeks. How did I get so lucky?
Alan came back with his mom, his arm around her. Had they both been crying? He pulled away and came to me, wrapping me up in those warm, muscular arms and kissing me again. "I fucking love you so much," he whispered into my ear and I shuddered, trying to keep myself from going hard at that statement. There were children present. I rubbed wet, soapy hands on his shirt and he jumped back, indignation on his face.
Eva came to the sink and elbowed me out of the way, "Get away from those dishes, Sean. Don't make me have to say it again."
"Yes, ma'am," I wiped my hands on a towel and scooted out of the kitchen, joining family members in the living room. I expected people to treat us differently after they found out we were dating, but everyone was chill about it. No one even asked who was the pitcher and who was the catcher, thank God. I wasn’t sure I would have been able to answer that civilly.
Lou was back on his Switch, and I kind of wished I had a video game to occupy my time. It would make me feel less awkward if I had s
omething to do with my hands.
Somehow we survived all the small talk and copious amounts of hugs from Alan’s mom. His Uncle Gary had been quiet for the rest of the time he was there, dragging Lou home after another hour. Alan’s Grandma seemed oblivious to the entire thing, even though she’d been sitting next to his mom when he’d come out. Maybe because she was hard of hearing, or because she was eighty years old and didn’t give a fuck anymore.
“Ready to go?” he asked once most people had left. He’d been sitting on the floor playing with Hank while I watched. I couldn’t help but notice how good he was with kids.
"Yeah, my mom keeps texting me asking if I'm on my way."
"I still can't believe you wanted to surprise them like this. You didn't even tell them you were bringing someone?" He scowled and ran his hand through his hair nervously.
I grinned, "Nah, you'll understand when you get there. It's better this way."
Alan hugged his mom goodbye, and she swept me up into another bone-crushing hug. "I'm so glad it's you," she whispered in my ear and grinned at me when we parted. I blushed and grinned back at her. A tremendous weight lifted off my chest. I hadn't realized just how much I wanted her approval.
"Okay, boyfriend," Alan smirked at me as we walked back to my car. "Time for dinner."
"Can I just eat you instead?" I licked my lips and caught him staring at them. "You look just as hungry."
"Fuck," he chuckled and ducked into the car as I got in the driver's seat. Before I could put the key into the ignition, he pulled me into a searing kiss, his hands on my chest, then my crotch. He rubbed my dick, which had gone instantly hard.
I tried to get closer to him and ended up kneeing the steering wheel painfully, "Shit, this won’t work."
"It's okay, we'll have time later."
"Yeah, in my childhood bedroom." The plan was to stay the night there since we'd be too stuffed full of turkey and wine by the time we finished dinner. My parents shouldn't mind, I hoped. Because damn, if that bedroom could talk. I'd spent so much of my youth fantasizing about having Alan in my bed, and I wanted all of my dreams to come true before I woke up.
I shifted the car into reverse and tried not to think about my hand wrapped around some other stick as we drove the ten minutes to my parents' house.
When I pulled up, my sister's red Volkswagen Jetta sat parked crookedly in the driveway behind my parents' cars. Thanksgiving dinner in my family was not the packed family affair that Alan had. We still did a traditional turkey with stuffing and gravy and a ham if my dad was feeling cheeky, but otherwise, it was only for immediate family. I never brought anyone home for Thanksgiving, even if I'd been dating someone over the holidays. There was still always plenty of food, so having Alan there shouldn't be an issue. But it was still an enormous deal for me, and my family would realize it right away.
I opened the door and let myself in, taking in the scent of turkey roasting and other smells like cinnamon and nutmeg. My parents' dog, Snuffles, came up to us and barked happily, the little schnauzer jumping on my legs.
My sister, Anne, rounded the corner, "Sean!" She ran up to me and gave me a hug, then her eyes widened to the size of dinner plates when she realized who was standing behind me. "Alan, I didn’t—we didn't know Sean was bringing a guest." Her eyes narrowed at me and her eyebrows furrowed. Is he? She mouthed, and I grinned and nodded. She shrieked and ran off down the hall like she was thirteen again, socks slipping on the wood floors. "MOM! DAD! IT HAPPENED! IT FINALLY HAPPENED!"
I turned to Alan, who was doubled over laughing. "Well, to be honest, that's about what I expected," I laughed, then I grabbed his hand and dragged him into the kitchen.
My parents were grinning at me. Anne's smile was so large I thought she might hurt herself. "Oh you guys, stop it, you’ll embarrass him."
"They all knew?" Alan asked.
"Oh Alan," my mom walked up to him and gave him a hug, "You've always made Sean so happy. Is Anne telling the truth?"
My face heated, but I nodded. “Somehow, by some crazy miracle, it happened between us, mom.” I stepped close to Alan and put a hand on his shoulder.
"Prove it," Anne said. "Prove you're together and this isn't just some stupid prank. You're not pranking my brother, are you, Alan?"
Alan shook his head and took my hand in his, “I love him, but I feel weird about having to prove myself.”
"What if I just wanted to see you two kiss?" she pouted.
"Anne, don't you have something better to do than torture us?" I gave her a light shove, and she giggled.
"It was worth a try," she took the plates from my mom and pranced off to set the table.
"Was your sister always that crazy?" Alan asked, watching her go.
My mom butted in, "Med school does weird things to you." We all laughed and my heart filled with warmth. Having Alan there felt so natural. My family easily accepted him, happy that I'd finally gotten what I'd been wanting for so long. And Alan knew them all well enough to talk and shoot the shit with them without there being any awkwardness.
When the food was ready, we sat for dinner. Since our group was much smaller than Alan's, we went around the table and said what we were thankful for. My mom started, saying she was thankful her children could come visit and thankful for a new old face at the table. My dad was thankful the Denver Broncos had won their game that day. My sister was thankful for her health and family, same as usual, though she gave me a wink when she said family.
When it was my turn, I squeezed Alan's hand, "I'm thankful for my supportive family. You were always there for me, no matter what, never trying to change me, always willing to understand. You helped me through so many rough patches when I thought I was weird or different because I was hopelessly in love with my best friend. And I'm thankful for you, Alan. You are the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I can't believe I finally get to call you mine. I love you."
He gaped at me.
"You get to speak too," I urged.
"I don't know what to say," he said, panic written on his face.
Anne scoffed, “I saw your face when Sean was talking, you looked like you might bawl any second there.”
"He doesn't have to say anything if he doesn't want to," my dad said.
I raised his hand still clasped in mine and kissed it. "I get it, you're fine."
He leaned over and kissed me. My sister squealed with delight, but I could taste the tears he was holding back. “There's so much,” he said, eyes watering. “I can’t—”
I pressed a finger to his lips. “Hush, you can tell me later, or text me if you can't say it to my face, but the food's getting cold.” We passed the dishes of food around the table, and I filled my plate with all the traditional Thanksgiving foods yet again. I was ready for round two of turkey and stuffing and cranberry sauce and mashed potatoes and green bean casserole.
"You're still staying with us tonight, right?" My mom asked.
I nodded. "After we finish this bottle of wine, I won’t want to make the drive back home. Hope it's not an issue for Alan to stay too."
"No, Alan is as welcome as you are."
"Good, I'm glad," I wrapped my arm around him and pulled him close, and we kissed.
We watched the last hour of a Hallmark movie before the carbs got the better of me and I started dozing off. We grabbed our bags out of the car and headed upstairs to my room.
"I'm sharing a wall with you, don't forget it!" Anne called up the stairs. "If you two get hot and heavy in there, it’ll keep me up all night."
"Oh, you like it," I called back down to her. "I’ll be extra loud just for you."
"Gross, not you. Alan. He's the one that can be extra loud."
"No, that's gross. Get your own boyfriend." I opened my bedroom door and shoved Alan inside, worried someone else might jump out and try to claim him as theirs.
Alan looked around the room in amazement. “I haven't been in this room in so long but it looks exactly the same.” My parents had pr
eserved a lot of my childhood decorations, allowing the room to stay about how it was before I went off to college. Though they'd replaced the bed, upgrading it from a twin to a queen. I was disappointed I wouldn't get to fool around with Alan on the original bed from my teenage explorations of my body and sexuality, but it was for the best. No telling how much teenage spunk had soaked into that mattress.
“It's been a while, hasn’t it?” I wasn't even sure how long it had been. It felt like forever. Why hadn't we made more of an effort to travel back home together even when he thought I was straight? It was way more fun this way, and we kept each other company in the car and made fun of each other for doing stupid shit.
I sat on my bed and crooked a finger at him. I widened my legs when he stepped in between them, fisting my shirt collar and pulling me into a kiss. He tasted like whipped cream and nutmeg and pumpkin pie.
“I love you so much.” My dick ached at the thought of how much I loved him and wanted him all the fucking time. “We have to be quiet, but I really need a fuck right now. I've wanted you inside me all day,” I whispered. It was close enough to begging that he grinned wickedly and stripped, slowly taking his shirt off. I pulled my own clothes off in seconds, fishing around in my bag for lube and climbing onto hands and knees, presenting my ass to him.
He groaned, a lustful, husky sound, before roughly palming my ass cheeks and squirting lube over my hole. I moaned into a pillow when he slid one finger, then two inside me. After three fingers, I was a quivering mess. If so much as a finger brushed my dick, I would explode. I reached down and squeezed the base of my shaft to stave off orgasm and Alan chuckled.
After he removed his fingers, I was empty, my ass wanting more, needing to fill the void. "Please," I begged.
"Well, since you asked so nicely," he climbed onto his knees and pressed himself against my hole, thick, hard, and bare. "Ready for me?"