by Lauren Dane
But she’d given herself to him, along with her deepest trust and he’d spend eternity making sure she was never sorry about that.
Before Alice could come get him, he’d gone to the elevator lobby where Rowan would arrive and when the doors slid open, he let himself take a long look.
She was annoyed and he considered that a good sign. For Rowan, annoyance was like breathing, and so much better than the grief she’d been drowning in the last time he’d seen her.
“It’s my bride,” he said, just to needle her and watch the flare in her eyes as she flipped him off.
“Have you eaten? You’re pale,” she told him as she breezed past. He wanted a hug and a kiss or two, but she wasn’t going to indulge him as they were surrounded by Vampires at work.
But she did ask after his well-being, which was pretty close to a yelled declaration of love from his notoriously prickly wife.
“I’m told Vampires are very pale. I’d planned to shortly. But I’ll wait since you’re here.”
She went through to his office and made herself a cup of coffee as he trailed in after her. “Go and feed, for fuck’s sake. I can see you need to and it’s vexing me that you won’t just handle it and take care of yourself. You don’t have to hide the fact that you need blood. I figured it out and everything,” she said.
There were topics the two of them were very careful about. Rowan understood the need for Vampires, even very old ones like he was, to take blood to sustain themselves. In times of stress, high activity, great physical damage, they needed to feed more often to remain in top form.
But.
Now that they shared the bond after she’d given him her blood freely, he knew she was slightly uncomfortable with the idea that anyone else could make him feel—or that he could make anyone else feel—the way they did together.
Of course, as there was no one in existence who was what she was to him, he’d assured her that was not the case. But her discomfort was there anyway and though it bothered him that she’d be unhappy, he couldn’t deny that tiny bit of pleasure that came from a person like Rowan being jealous over him.
He certainly could wait to feed until she was gone. “I said I’d be fine. I can wait. Tell me what you’ve been up to. What have you found?”
She gave him a narrowed glare. “This and that. The usual. Though I did not break and enter a single time, which seems very sad. You know how much I like doing crime.”
Her flip delivery would have been a relief if he’d believed she wasn’t hurting over the loss of not just a friend, but her home. And possibly another friend. Her tone lacked the zeal of her normal bitchy demeanor.
“Stop trying to hide from me.”
“Get bent, Scion.”
“Why are we fighting? Would you like me to take you in hand?”
“Seriously?” One of her brows went up but that mask, the one she’d worn when he’d first met her, was back.
He didn’t mind it when she played that part to others. But he damned well would not accept it toward him.
Yet there was no denying his response to her. To the creature of fire and glory she was, even in the middle of an argument she was using to divert him from the real issue she didn’t want to talk about.
He breathed deep, taking in the scent of her flesh. The raw power that flowed from her was nearly as good as blood.
“You came here, to me, for a reason. Was a fight with me your reason?” he asked, deceptively calm.
“Well, not at first. But then you were you and annoyed me because you’re annoying and now you’re compounding it with that tone.”
She shot to her feet after gulping her coffee. Before he could flinch or say a word, she pointed at him.
“I come in here and you’re not taking care of yourself. Well, fuck off. You pester me nonstop about texting or whatever when I am doing my job, but you can’t even eat? In a building full of Vampires who’d wet their pants at the opportunity to open a vein for you? Why? In the time we’ve been apart I’ve gone to my old place, gone to Thena and Martin’s and dealt with making sure the shrine was safe.”
There it was.
How could he have missed it? Fear. For him. Worry that she’d lose someone else she loved.
She’d told him to take care of himself and he’d brushed it aside without seeing the why. And what it took for her to open herself up.
He certainly needed to improve his performance in the husband department.
Clive inclined his head. “You’re correct. I’m not taking care of myself and as I want you to do the same, I should do that now. I’ll have Alice bring you some dinner. I’ll be back shortly. Then I want to hear about your activities this evening.”
The wariness in her gaze had a bit of fire in it and he relaxed a little. He wanted to go to her and gather her in his arms, but he knew she didn’t need that. Later, when they were alone he would touch to his heart’s content. For both their sakes.
He did allow a brief brush of his lips against hers as he moved past. “Don’t ruin this lovely moment by pretending you don’t need to eat. Just tell Alice what you want.”
She snorted but leaned into his touch a moment.
Letting him comfort her. Letting him in a tiny bit more. Each moment felt like a victory when she did.
He was sure he looked smug when he left but he didn’t care. He took particular pleasure from people knowing she was his. It made him stronger, he knew it and so did she.
* * *
Alice strolled in shortly after Clive left. “Hello, Rowan. Let me get your dinner order made and then I want to hear about your evening.”
Clive’s Mary Poppins with fangs happened to be one of the few Vampires Rowan truly enjoyed. Totally competent. Calm and cool. A badass when she needed to be and surprisingly handy to have on one’s side in combat.
“He’ll want to eat with you, so I’ve already sent his order in,” Alice added. “The chef told me to let you know he’s got salmon and those potatoes you like.”
They weren’t supposed to like her and care about what foods she enjoyed.
Rowan frowned, internally. Sure, most of Clive’s staff, like Vampires in general, didn’t trust her and still considered her an enemy of their kind—and she was to a certain extent—but the chef liked to feed her and Alice clucked after her like she did Clive. Even his parents liked her.
“Uh, sure. That sounds great. Tell him thanks.”
While Clive was gone and food was being handled by Alice and the chef, Rowan got on her phone to check in with Susan and the Hunter Corp. Motherhouse business.
“Hello, sweetheart,” Susan answered. “How are you?”
Rowan made a sound. A grunt that said good and bad. “I’m calling in to see if there’s anything new on your end.”
“We’ve got some leads, so I’m following up. Rex is on the case, so eventually we’ll find them.”
Just a few days prior they’d cleared Hunter Corporation of a nest of traitors. Coworkers who’d sold their fellow Hunters out for greed. As a result, Hunters had died. Bystanders had died. Their oath of service and loyalty had been broken. It turned out the traitors wanted to break the Treaty and bring about a war they figured they could win as long as Hunters in the field like Rowan had to fight and die while they remained safe behind a desk.
Rowan didn’t take kindly to the numerous attempts to kill her and her protected staff so she’d brought the hammer down and cleaned house.
But some of the collaborators had gotten away. And clearly there were those involved she hadn’t even found yet. She would. Worse for them, Susan and Rex were running them to ground like the prey they were.
“Excellent. Let me know if you need anything on my end.” Rowan attempted to sound clearheaded and businesslike.
“I need you to take care of yourself.” Susan’s tone told Rowan she’d failed in tr
ying to sound unaffected.
“I’m not dead like Carey. I’m not missing like Thena.” She’s dead. That had settled into her brain, a whisper she’d been pretending to ignore. “I’m fucking fine.”
Susan sighed softly. “Rowan, you’re not fine. No one in your situation could be. You suffered a terrible loss on a personal and professional level. You’ve been under constant threat for three solid years and even before that you had a life full of danger and loss. You’re grieving. It’s perfectly all right not to be fine. If you don’t bend, sweetheart, you’ll break.”
Rowan snarled, “I can’t afford that right now. There will be time when this is over.” She savagely shoved away from the weight of all that grief.
“Darling,” Susan began and then went silent a moment.
Rowan hated the break in her voice as she said, “I can’t. Please let this go.”
“Fine,” Susan told her in a terse voice. And though she didn’t want to, Rowan heard the tenderness and concern as well. “At least get some sleep and keep yourself fed.”
“I’m about to have dinner with Clive,” Rowan assured her friend.
“Tell your husband I’ll be expecting him to keep you in line in my stead. I love you. You will check in regularly so Rex and I won’t worry as much.”
Clive had walked in as Susan had delivered those words and since he had such great hearing, he gave Rowan a smirk.
“Tell her your husband plans on it, though he can’t promise there won’t be a scuffle,” he said in a near purr, sending out some serious sexy vibes her way.
Susan’s laugh told Rowan she’d heard. “Have dinner. Call me soon.”
Dinner showed up before she could give him any lip about his love of needling her with all this husband and wife business.
It’d only been a month since they’d become their weirdo version of married. Only days ago it had been formally and publically announced by The First, who was also pretty much her dad and absolutely Clive’s boss. Still totally new and she was still trying to wrap her head around it all.
Rowan tucked into her food after thanking Alice, who hustled off after getting a promise she’d be updated later.
“Tell me what you’ve learned tonight,” he said as he placed a napkin over his lap.
His color was better and she relaxed a little. Since she’d eaten enough to feel a little less shaky, she said, “The sorcerers had been casing my place. They knew I wasn’t in Las Vegas. They knew Carey was there alone and they knew he’d be video calling me at the Keep to congratulate us. They had spells to get past my wards and enter my domicile. Appeared to know the basic layout of the apartment as well. That could have been obtained via architectural plans I suppose. But the rest? The rest would have taken some assistance from the inside.”
He got very still as she spoke, thinking, she knew, over every possible angle and implication. He didn’t interrupt her either, knowing there was more. Waiting.
“Right as we were getting ready to leave my place I got a call about Thena. No one’s heard from her for over a week.” The whisper rose in the back of her mind again. “We stopped by her house to give it a once-over. No sign of a struggle. Locks, windows, doors all fine. No indication of a break-in. I didn’t use luminol or do anything like that.”
“Why not?” he asked.
“Seemed like maybe I was panicking to go that far when it’s most likely nothing.”
“And doing it would make the chance of something really being wrong seem more real,” he murmured, knowing her so well. “She goes off from time to time. Even I know that.”
“Which is why I didn’t break down the scene all forensic-like and shit. Anyway, David is poking around to see if Martin gave any indication he was taking any time off. Depending on whatever David unearths, I’ll return with a full kit or wait this out another day or two.”
“I do hope this is simply a matter of them being on a beach somewhere. Would you like me to send my people over to take a look? They’re more sensitive to scents than you are. And they’re quite good at not disturbing anything so Thena won’t know Vampires were in her space. And if she’s there for some reason, you can blame it on my overzealousness in pleasing you.”
He’d paused ever so slightly right before he said scents. Rowan knew he was going to say blood and corrected so as not to upset her. No one else would have even noticed, but she’d been with him—argued with him—countless times. She knew his tells.
Knowing they were alone, Rowan took his hand a moment. “You are overzealous in your desire to protect me.” It made her warm inside, the feeling still very new. And very wondrous that anyone would feel such a way about her.
“You’re mine.” He shrugged and she gave in to a sigh.
“You’re sexy and annoying all rolled into one. It’s dizzying just how much I want to punch you and fuck you at the same time.”
That made him laugh, the full-throated sound that was hers alone.
“Darling, you do know I’m very high capacity, yes?” He leaned close enough to kiss her quickly.
“You want to send over a team to Thena’s because you think there’s been a scene cleanup and you don’t want me to see whatever horror show might reveal itself if I use luminol,” Rowan said.
He gave a minute tip of his chin. “It’s one possibility I’d rather spare you if I can. You’re concerned but not enough and maybe too much. So let me do this. It’ll satisfy my need to protect you and hopefully make you feel a little better when they report back.”
It was her job to open that door and go in. Her job and she should just do it. Rowan knew she was being ridiculous and weak but the thought of seeing her friend in there in the wake of watching Carey’s murder was more than she wanted to confront.
“Let me take this small burden from you,” he said quietly as he pulled her into his arms. “You have so very much on your shoulders.”
Rowan closed her eyes and it felt so good to just relax against him, felt so good to trust him and be vulnerable knowing he’d never use that to harm or manipulate her.
* * *
Clive took her silence as permission and once she handed over the key, he left his office momentarily to get a team over to Thena’s immediately. Because he knew she’d only pester him relentlessly about it, he also underlined the importance of not disturbing the inside of the home more than necessary. His team were professionals, it wasn’t necessary, but Rowan would have said it, so he did as well. That way when she barked at him about it, he’d be able to give her an answer she’d be pleased by.
“Did she eat enough?” Alice asked him once they were alone again. “She looks very tired. She didn’t even snarl at the guards downstairs.”
He didn’t know what to do when confronted with his fiery wife being so upset without any real way of fixing it. So he fell back on things he could control. Sending a team out so yes, she wasn’t the one to find yet another dead friend. Feeding her. Poking at her until she got agitated so she forgot her guilt for at least a few moments.
Sex was high up on the list but that’d have to wait until they were home.
“Has she called the Keep?” Alice asked in a voice barely above a whisper.
“She let them know we’d arrived safely but I expect she’ll need a more in-depth call with her father soon.” Clive tried to not get himself between Rowan and The First. Not just because her father was the most dangerous creature on the planet, but because the relationship between them was complicated and though as a Vampire, Clive’s allegiance should belong to The First, it now belonged to Rowan.
He hadn’t found a way to be entirely comfortable with that reality yet. He’d never been in such a situation before. Then again, there was no one in all the world like Rowan so it made sense that he should feel that way.
“They’re off,” he told Rowan as he came back into his office. “I asked them to get
all the data back to you as they went.” Because his wife was beyond impatient and he could see her getting more and more antsy as the time passed.
“I just realized everyone I want to talk to about my apartment is out now, over at Thena’s.” She frowned and that spelled trouble for everyone.
It wasn’t like either of them to forget a thing like that. He needed to refocus or he’d miss something important. He needed to be there for her, an extra set of eyes and hands. As it was, he could easily take the current situation and spin it to a positive.
“I can take you home now and then you can go over the report from the scene at your apartment now that you’ve been there yourself. When you meet with my team tomorrow it’ll have been after enough time for you to have formulated questions about both scenes. You know you’re much better at your job after some rest and time for the data to do whatever it does in your brain.” Clive waved a hand.
She hadn’t slept and he wanted to have her to himself for a while before he went to rest. She’d drive herself into the ground with her grief and guilt, but she was not at her best when she was tired and so much was riding on her shoulders that even the smallest error could cause her harm.
“The longer this waits, the longer Carey’s murder is unavenged.”
Though he knew it was most likely useless, he wanted her to focus on the bigger picture and tamp down all this guilt that was blinding her. “I know you want to get out there and handle all this immediately. I know you want to kill those who hurt Carey. Just like I know you understand these things take time. I wish it were different, but it isn’t. You want your wrath. You’ll get your wrath. But at this point, you’re exhausted and not seeing all the moving parts. We both didn’t see how sending a team out to Thena’s would create this exact situation. Tired people make mistakes. There are other things you can do in the interim.”
He sighed very quietly as she warred with herself. A wave of tenderness rushed through him and then, he watched her as it flowed through their bond.