The Road to Oz

by L. Frank Baum

  The Shaggy Man's Transformation

  They found the houses of the town all low and square and built ofbricks, neatly whitewashed inside and out. The houses were not set inrows, forming regular streets, but placed here and there in a haphazardmanner which made it puzzling for a stranger to find his way.

  "Stupid people must have streets and numbered houses in their cities, toguide them where to go," observed the grey donkey, as he walked beforethe visitors on his hind legs, in an awkward but comical manner; "butclever donkeys know their way about without such absurd marks. Moreover,a mixed city is much prettier than one with straight streets."

  Dorothy did not agree with this, but she said nothing to contradict it.Presently she saw a sign on a house that read: "Madam de Fayke,Hoofist," and she asked their conductor:

  "What's a 'hoofist,' please?"

  "One who reads your fortune in your hoofs," replied the grey donkey.

  "Oh, I see," said the little girl. "You are quite civilized here."

  "Dunkiton," he replied, "is the center of the world's highestcivilization."

  They came to a house where two youthful donkeys were whitewashing thewall, and Dorothy stopped a moment to watch them. They dipped the endsof their tails, which were much like paint-brushes, into a pail ofwhitewash, backed up against the house, and wagged their tails right andleft until the whitewash was rubbed on the wall, after which they dippedthese funny brushes in the pail again and repeated the performance.

  "That must be fun," said Button-Bright.

  "No; it's work," replied the old donkey; "but we make our youngsters doall the whitewashing, to keep them out of mischief."

  "Don't they go to school?" asked Dorothy.

  "All donkeys are born wise," was the reply, "so the only school we needis the school of experience. Books are only fit for those who knownothing, and so are obliged to learn things from other people."

  "In other words, the more stupid one is the more he thinks he knows,"observed the shaggy man. The grey donkey paid no attention to thisspeech because he had just stopped before a house which had painted overthe doorway a pair of hoofs, with a donkey tail between them and a rudecrown and sceptre above.

  "I'll see if his magnificent Majesty King Kik-a-bray is at home," saidhe. He lifted his head and called "Whee-haw! whee-haw! whee-haw!" threetimes, in a shocking voice, turning about and kicking with his heelsagainst the panel of the door. For a time there was no reply; then thedoor opened far enough to permit a donkey's head to stick out and lookat them.

  It was a white head, with big, awful ears and round, solemn eyes.

  "Have the foxes gone?" it asked, in a trembling voice.

  "They haven't been here, most stupendous Majesty," replied the grey one."The new arrivals prove to be travelers of distinction."

  "Oh," said the King, in a relieved tone of voice. "Let them come in."

  He opened the door wide, and the party marched into a big room, which,Dorothy thought, looked quite unlike a king's palace. There were mats ofwoven grasses on the floor and the place was clean and neat; but hisMajesty had no other furniture at all--perhaps because he didn't needit. He squatted down in the center of the room and a little brown donkeyran and brought a big gold crown which it placed on the monarch's head,and a golden staff with a jeweled ball at the end of it, which the Kingheld between his front hoofs as he sat upright.

  "Now, then," said his Majesty, waving his long ears gently to and fro,"tell me why you are here, and what you expect me to do for you." Heeyed Button-Bright rather sharply, as if afraid of the little boy'squeer head, though it was the shaggy man who undertook to reply.

  "Most noble and supreme ruler of Dunkiton," he said, trying not to laughin the solemn King's face, "we are strangers traveling through yourdominions, and have entered your magnificent city because the road ledthrough it, and there was no way to go around. All we desire is to payour respects to your Majesty--the cleverest king in all the world, I'msure--and then to continue on our way."

  This polite speech pleased the King very much; indeed, it pleased him somuch that it proved an unlucky speech for the shaggy man. Perhaps theLove Magnet helped to win his Majesty's affection as well as theflattery, but however this may be the white donkey looked kindly uponthe speaker and said:

  "Only a donkey should be able to use such fine, big words, and you aretoo wise and admirable in all ways to be a mere man. Also I feel that Ilove you as well as I do my own favored people, so I will bestow uponyou the greatest gift within my power--a donkey's head."

  As he spoke he waved his jeweled staff. Although the shaggy man criedout and tried to leap backward and escape, it proved of no use. Suddenlyhis own head was gone and a donkey head appeared in its place--a brown,shaggy head so absurd and droll that Dorothy and Polly both broke intomerry laughter, and even Button-Bright's fox face wore a smile.

  "Dear me! dear me!" cried the shaggy man, feeling of his shaggy new headand his long ears. "What a misfortune--what a great misfortune! Give meback my own head, you stupid king--if you love me at all!"

  "Don't you like it?" asked the King, surprised.

  "Hee-haw! I hate it! Take it away--quick!" said the shaggy man.

  KING KICK-A-BRAY WORKS MAGIC ON THE SHAGGY MAN]

  "But I can't do that," was the reply. '"My magic works only one way. Ican _do_ things, but I can't _un_ do them. You'll have to find the TruthPond, and bathe in its water, in order to get back your own head. ButI advise you not to do that. This head is much more beautiful than theold one."

  "That's a matter of taste," said Dorothy.

  "Where is the Truth Pond?" asked the shaggy man, earnestly.

  "Somewhere in the Land of Oz; but just the exact location of it I cannot tell," was the answer.

  "Don't worry, Shaggy Man," said Dorothy, smiling because her friendwagged his new ears so comically. "If the Truth Pond is in Oz we'll besure to find it when we get there."

  "Oh! Are you going to the Land of Oz?" asked King Kik-a-bray.

  "I don't know," she replied; "but we've been told we are nearer the Landof Oz than to Kansas, and if that's so the quickest way for me to gethome is to find Ozma."

  "Haw-haw! Do you know the mighty Princess Ozma?" asked the King, histone both surprised and eager.

  "'Course I do; she's my friend," said Dorothy.

  "Then perhaps you'll do me a favor," continued the white donkey, muchexcited.

  "What is it?" she asked.

  "Perhaps you can get me an invitation to Princess Ozma's birthdaycelebration, which will be the grandest royal function ever held inFairyland. I'd love to go."

  "Hee-haw! You deserve punishment, rather than reward, for giving me thisdreadful head," said the shaggy man, sorrowfully.

  "I wish you wouldn't say 'hee-haw' so much," Polychrome begged him; "itmakes cold chills run down my back."

  "But I can't help it, my dear; my donkey head wants to braycontinually," he replied. "Doesn't your fox head want to yelp everyminute?" he asked Button-Bright.

  "Don't know," said the boy, still staring at the shaggy man's ears.These seemed to interest him greatly, and the sight also made him forgethis own fox head, which was a comfort.

  "What do you think, Polly? shall I promise the donkey king an invitationto Ozma's party?" asked Dorothy of the Rainbow's Daughter, who wasflitting about the room like a sunbeam because she could never keepstill.

  "Do as you please, dear," answered Polychrome. "He might help to amusethe guests of the Princess."

  "Then, if you will give us some supper and a place to sleep to-night,and let us get started on our journey early tomorrow morning," saidDorothy to the King, "I'll ask Ozma to invite you--if I happen to get toOz."

  "Good! Hee-haw! Excellent!" cried Kik-a-bray, much pleased. "You shallall have fine suppers and good beds. What food would you prefer, a branmash or ripe oats in the shell?"

  "Neither one," replied Dorothy, promptly.

  "Perhaps plain hay, or some sweet juicy grass would suit you better,"suggested Kik-a-br
ay, musingly.

  "Is that all you have to eat?" asked the girl.

  "What more do you desire?"

  "Well, you see we're not donkeys," she explained, "and so we're used toother food. The foxes gave us a nice supper in Foxville."

  "We'd like some dewdrops and mist-cakes," said Polychrome.

  "I'd prefer apples and a ham sandwich," declared the shaggy man; "foralthough I've a donkey head I still have my own particular stomach."

  "I want pie," said Button-Bright.

  "I think some beefsteak and chocolate layer-cake would taste best," saidDorothy.

  "Hee-haw! I declare!" exclaimed the King. "It seems each one of youwants a different food. How queer all living creatures are, exceptdonkeys!"

  "And donkeys like you are queerest of all," laughed Polychrome.

  "Well," decided the King, "I suppose my Magic Staff will produce thethings you crave; if you are lacking in good taste it is not my fault."

  With this he waved his staff with the jeweled ball, and before theminstantly appeared a tea-table, set with linen and pretty dishes, and onthe table were the very things each had wished for. Dorothy's beefsteakwas smoking hot, and the shaggy man's apples were plump androsy-cheeked. The King had not thought to provide chairs, so they allstood in their places around the table and ate with good appetite, beinghungry. The Rainbow's Daughter found three tiny dewdrops on a crystalplate, and Button-Bright had a big slice of apple-pie, which he devouredeagerly.

  Afterward the King called the brown donkey, which was his favoriteservant, and bade it lead his guests to the vacant house where theywere to pass the night. It had only one room and no furniture exceptbeds of clean straw and a few mats of woven grasses; but our travelerswere contented with these simple things because they realized it was thebest the Donkey-King had to offer them. As soon as it was dark they laydown on the mats and slept comfortably until morning.

  At daybreak there was a dreadful noise throughout the city. Every donkeyin the place brayed. When he heard this the shaggy man woke up andcalled out "Hee-haw!" as loud as he could.

  "Stop that!" said Button-Bright, in a cross voice. Both Dorothy andPolly looked at the shaggy man reproachfully.

  "I couldn't help it, my dears," he said, as if ashamed of his bray; "butI'll try not to do it again."

  Of course they forgave him, for as he still had the Love Magnet in hispocket they were all obliged to love him as much as ever.

  They did not see the King again, but Kik-a-bray remembered them; for atable appeared again in their room with the same food upon it as on thenight before.

  "Don't want pie for breakfus'," said Button-Bright.

  "I'll give you some of my beefsteak," proposed Dorothy; "there's plentyfor us all."

  That suited the boy better, but the shaggy man said he was content withhis apples and sandwiches, although he ended the meal by eatingButton-Bright's pie. Polly liked her dewdrops and mist-cakes better thanany other food, so they all enjoyed an excellent breakfast. Toto had thescraps left from the beefsteak, and he stood up nicely on his hind legswhile Dorothy fed them to him.

  Breakfast ended, they passed through the village to the side oppositethat by which they had entered, the brown servant-donkey guiding themthrough the maze of scattered houses. There was the road again, leadingfar away into the unknown country beyond.

  "King Kik-a-bray says you must not forget his invitation," said thebrown donkey, as they passed through the opening in the wall.

  "I shan't," promised Dorothy.

  Perhaps no one ever beheld a more strangely assorted group than the onewhich now walked along the road, through pretty green fields and pastgroves of feathery pepper-trees and fragrant mimosa. Polychrome, herbeautiful gauzy robes floating around her like a rainbow cloud, wentfirst, dancing back and forth and darting now here to pluck awild-flower or there to watch a beetle crawl across the path. Toto ranafter her at times, barking joyously the while, only to become soberagain and trot along at Dorothy's heels. The little Kansas girl walkedholding Button-Bright's hand clasped in her own, and the wee boy withhis fox head covered by the sailor hat presented an odd appearance.Strangest of all, perhaps, was the shaggy man, with his shaggy donkeyhead, who shuffled along in the rear with his hands thrust deep in hisbig pockets.

  None of the party was really unhappy. All were straying in an unknownland and had suffered more or less annoyance and discomfort; but theyrealized they were having a fairy adventure in a fairy country, and weremuch interested in finding out what would happen next.