The next few days were a blur for Luisa. Although Carlos had been told, he was too young to realize what it meant. A funeral Mass was held at the local Catholic Church in Huntington Beach, attended by the few people Jorge and Luisa had come to know since moving to California.
Luisa and Carlos flew to Rio, accompanied by Diego and Juanita. Both families had been members of the oldest Catholic Church in Rio for decades. The large funeral Mass was attended by all of Rio's society, politicians, business community, Jorge's beloved employees, and the press. It was one of the largest funeral services to ever take place in the Church. Every pew was filled and cameras filmed the service, feeding it to an overflow crowd gathered in an adjoining building.
Although the death was tragic, it was a story made for the newspapers and the Rio newspapers made the most of it. A wealthy gold mine owner from one of the founding families of Rio murdered by indigenous tribesmen in the Amazon, leaving a beautiful young wife and infant son was a story that even made its way into People magazine and the supermarket tabloids.
Unfortunately, the story also told how Jorge's head had been paraded on a spear deep in the Amazon. In true tabloid fashion, some unknown member of the "paparazzi" had managed to find his way to the remote village where Jorge's head was displayed and had taken a photograph of it. Grief stricken, Luisa stayed at home most of the time and avoided any painful interviews with the press. When she finally ventured out, the tabloids had already moved on to the next "big" story.
Even though she was burdened by a broken heart, there were decisions that could only be made by Luisa. Should she sell the Rio condominium? Close out the Rio accounts? Go into the family gold mining business? Stay in Rio? Go back to California? Sell the boat? Sell the Huntington Beach house? Move to a smaller home in California? Her mind spun with all the critical decisions that had to be made. While most experts say no big decisions should be made until a year after the death of a loved one, many of Luisa's decisions simply couldn't wait.
After being in Rio for a few weeks she decided to permanently move back there. Although her sister and parents still tied her to California, without Jorge, the big house on the water held little appeal for her. She decided to sell it. She called John and asked him if he knew someone who might be interested in the boat. She didn't care about making a profit on the house or the boat. Given her state of mind, she couldn't deal with such details.
When she told her parents that she had decided to move back to Rio, that her roots and Carlos' were there, not in California, her parents decided to move back to Rio with her. They enjoyed California, but they missed their friends and other family members. They, too, would miss Selena, but they couldn't stand to be so far away from Carlos during his childhood years. With Jorge gone, they knew Luisa and Carlos would need them more than ever.
After many long talks with Tomas, Luisa agreed to join the family business. She promised her parents she would not go to the mines, but she would help run the company from Rio. Jose was promoted to General Manager of all the Ortega mines. He was highly respected and coming from the indigenous people, he would have no problem supervising the employees, which was such a large part of a successful gold mining business. Luisa and Jose got along well. She knew Jorge had completely trusted him and she looked forward to working with him.
When Luz and Manny found out that Luisa was moving back to Rio, they asked if they could have their old jobs back. Luisa was thrilled to have them in her employ once again. Luz told her to forget about looking for a nanny, that she could be a nanny and a maid. She clearly adored little Carlos.
With all that had happened in the last few weeks, Luisa had completely forgotten about Freedom. She had noticed that she was feeling tense, angry, and subject to sudden verbal outbursts, but she rationalized it all as being caused by Jorge’s death. Now she realized she was two weeks late in taking her next Freedom pill and that the pills weren't in Rio; they were in California. Well, she thought, I can take it when I return to California next week.
Luisa had no desire to go back to California, to where she and Jorge had been so happy. She knew the memories would overwhelm her, but she also knew there were business matters to attend to there and she was the only one who could take care of them. She needed to put the house and boat up for sale and decide what to do with their household goods. It would be a very busy time. Fortunately, her parents had decided to travel back to California with Luisa and Carlos as they, too, needed to take care of business matters before returning permanently to Rio.
The thought of Jorge and his forgotten pill crossed her mind. Once again she wondered if it had played a part in his death. When Tomas had told her that Jorge had not taken a guard with him when he went to relieve himself, she was pretty sure that his lack of judgment was from drug withdrawal. She would never know, but she began to develop a hatred for the drug on which she had become so dependent.
The night before she was to fly back to California, Luisa suddenly woke up shaking, not an uncommon occurrence for her since Jorge's death, but this time it was different. She had been dreaming and Jorge had spoken to her in the dream. He told her he had caused his own death because of faulty judgment brought on by his failure to take his regular dose of Freedom. So strongly could she sense his presence, it was as if he was in the room with her.
He pleaded with her to quit taking the drug. He told her he knew she might have some rough times caused by withdrawal symptoms, but that eventually she wouldn’t feel she needed the pill. He begged her to stop for Carlos' sake. Carlos needed her to be drug-free. Jorge reminded her that anytime Jeffrey wanted to withhold the pills for whatever reason, he could. He reminded her of how crazy and unpredictable Jeffrey had seemed when they saw him during the Memorial Day weekend. What if Jeffrey really went off the deep end and she could no longer get the pills? He told her to get rid of her reliance on Freedom and that the longer she waited, the harder it would be. He told her to call the psychologist, Sean, so he could help her. Although the dream was both startling and vivid, gradually it subsided.
She decided she would call Sean in the morning. With her decision made, she fell back into a deep and dreamless sleep, waking rested for the first time in weeks. After taking into account the time difference between Rio and Denver, she called Sean.
"This is Sean Moriarty, may I help you?" the voice on the other end of the phone said.
"Yes, you may remember me. My name is Luisa Ortega. We met at the Blue Coyote Motel. My life has changed dramatically since I last saw you. My husband, Jorge, was murdered in the Amazon and I've decided to take my son and move back to Rio. But that's not why I'm calling. I feel that Jorge's death was somehow related to his forgetting to take his Freedom pills to Rio with him on his last trip. I need to get off the pills. I’m two weeks past when I should have taken one and I feel foggy, kind of 'off.' I've even had bouts of sweating and the shakes.
“I kept your business card and you said to call if any of us ever wanted to talk. I remember that you chose not to take the pills. Maybe you can help me. I have decided I can't take them any longer. I have to be there for my infant son and the pills are interfering with my duty as a mother." It was a long explanation of her concerns, but Luisa felt much better after she had spoken.
Sean said, "Of course I remember you and I am so sorry to hear about Jorge. I liked him. I think I can be of help. You may remember Sam. He, too, decided not to take the pills. We knew we were going to go through some rough times and we have, but it's much better now. Sam and I decided to talk once a week via Skype. We formed a two-person group based on the successful model used by Alcoholics Anonymous. The basic premise is that you can't deal with problems of addiction by yourself, but you can help someone else and someone else can help you. The two of us are helping each other. You are welcome to join us. We talk at 9:00 p.m. every Wednesday night. If you're not familiar with Skype, have someone install it for you on your home computer and have them show you how to use it. With Skype we not only talk, but we c
an see each other as well. As I said, it's all done with your home computer. Skype also has the ability for group talks. I can set that up for the three of us. Sam and I are doing very well. I really think it would help you if you would join us on Wednesday nights."
Sean was surprised at how true his words were. He and Sam were both doing very well. The cravings for Freedom were becoming less and less frequent. Sean felt a lot of it was because he and Sam talked about their feelings and cravings. He was sure if Luisa joined them she would be helped too.
"Oh, Sean, thank you so much. You're offering me hope. When I made the decision last night, on one hand, I was sure it was the right one, but on the other hand, I was dreading what I might go through. If I have someone to talk to, it will be much easier," Luisa said, clearly grateful for Sean's help.
"And Luisa, don't forget. I'm a psychologist and Sam is a doctor so you're getting two professionals helping you for free."
They both laughed, knowing full well that Luisa could afford any professional she wanted. She told him she would have Skype installed and would call at 9:00 p.m. next Wednesday. She hung up feeling hopeful, as if a huge burden had been lifted from her shoulders. If she could get help from Sean and Sam, she felt she could make it through this time of almost insurmountable grief. She was eager for Wednesday to arrive.
CHAPTER 36
After leaving the Blue Coyote Motel on Memorial Day weekend, Jill drove to her home in the desert feeling great once again. She'd always loved the desert and even more so on late spring days like today. There was a little nagging voice in the back of her mind, a reminder that Rick still watched over her. She knew that he would have been unhappy with her decision to take Freedom, but she just didn't think she could go back to how she felt after his death. She was finally enjoying her life and had no desire to return to a mental state where she didn't care whether she lived or died and had seriously contemplated suicide.
When she got to her desert home, she called Aaron, who had become her best friend, her lover, her confidante, and her constant companion whenever they could arrange it. When he answered the phone, Jill said, "I'm so glad I went to that little motel in the desert. I really feel better and I think I look better too. I was probably overly tired, but I'm feeling fine now. You've never been to my home here in the desert. Why don't you fly into Ontario airport next Friday and I'll pick you up. It's only about an hour's drive from the airport to my home. The desert is so beautiful this time of year. Bring your clubs and I'll make a golf reservation for us."
"I've been so worried about you," Aaron said. "This is great news and a celebration is definitely in order. I'll meet you at the airport on Friday. My scheduler will make my flight reservation and I'll get back to you with my arrival time. I haven't played golf in a long time, although I've been meaning to take it up again. I never could seem to find the time for it, but I guess the time is now. We’ve never talked about this. Are you any good?"
"Well, I haven't played for a long time either, but at one time I could play without totally embarrassing myself. I'm not sure how I'll do now, but I'm game. I can't wait to see you!"
When Jill hung up, she realized just how true that was. She had missed him more than she had thought possible. She wasn't sure just how long she wanted to continue a long distance romance. The times she spent in between seeing him were getting terribly lonesome. Aaron had built a very lucrative and successful medical practice and she knew that if any future moves were to be made, they would have to be on her part.
As she unpacked, she noticed the little vial of Freedom pills in her suitcase and made a mental note to put them in her medicine chest when she returned to Newport Beach. She thought that Aaron, like Rick, would probably not be in favor of her decision to continue with the pills. It was something she'd hold off telling him, if she told him at all.
Jill picked Aaron up at the Ontario airport at 3:00 p.m. on Friday. They had to wait a long time for his golf clubs, but they finally slid down the chute marked "Oversize Luggage." Aaron wasn't the only one to ship golf clubs to the Ontario airport to be used in Palms Springs. The area had a worldwide reputation for having some of the finest golf courses in the country. A large number of golf bags joined Aaron's in the baggage claim area.
They had an easy drive to the greater Palm Springs area, arriving at Jill's home just before dusk. Aaron left his clubs in the car while they hurried into the house, poured a glass of wine, and took their drinks out to the patio. Her home faced the seventeenth hole of an exclusive golf club and was a perfect spot to watch the sun set. It was a beautiful evening and the desert was magical with breathtakingly beautiful pinks, purples, light blues, and dark blues. When it was finally dark, the sky was filled with stars.
"We don't have nights like this in San Francisco. There's too much fog and too many lights from the city. This is really something," Aaron said. "I don't remember seeing a sky like this in Newport Beach either."
"Newport is the same as San Francisco," Jill said. "Too many city lights; the desert has a beauty all of its own. I love to come here because I always feel like I'm on vacation."
Aaron said, "To change the subject. Do you remember Lenore? You met her at a hospital fundraiser when you were in San Francisco with me. Evidently, she's a good friend of your friend Marge, who, as I understand it, is the chairperson of the big Newport Hospital fundraising gala. I believe you handled the last silent auction for her. Anyway, Marge was going on and on about how successful it was because of you, so Lenore called me to see if you would be interested in moving to San Francisco. They're at a place where they need a full-time fundraising director at the hospital and they've decided to create this new position. I understand that it pays well and I think you would be great for it."
Aaron took a deep breath and went on, "I know it's early in our relationship, but I'd like you to move in with me and let's see where this goes. I've never been married and I'd like to take my time before either of us makes any permanent decisions. Take your time and think about it as long as you like, but please say yes."
Jill sat perfectly still, barely able to comprehend what she had just heard. A job in San Francisco and Aaron asking her to move in with him? She hadn't known what she wanted, but now that it was presented to her, this was exactly what she wanted.
"I don't even need to think about it," she said. "Absolutely! How soon does she want me to start? I'll need to take care of a few things before I can move to San Francisco, but I'll make it work. Oh, Aaron, I love you and I want to be with you. I've been so worried about the future of our relationship. I didn't know how we were going to make it work. This is a miracle."
Aaron reached out and took her face in his strong hands. "I promise I will do everything in my power to make you as happy as you're making me at this moment. Let's celebrate by going out to a fancy dinner, but first I'd like to celebrate privately in the other room."
He stood up, took her hand, closed the patio door behind him and gently pulled her into the bedroom. The celebratory dinner had been a great idea, but the private celebration was much better and lasted the whole night.
Aaron woke up to the smell of bacon sizzling on the stove griddle along with the smell of freshly made coffee. He walked into the kitchen to find Jill setting the breakfast table on the patio. She had squeezed fresh orange juice for their mimosas and was getting ready to mix the hollandaise sauce for their bacon eggs benedict. He helped her carry the plates out to the patio table where a big bouquet of flowers she had brought from inside the house sat in the middle of the table.
"I could really get used to this. Do you cook like this all the time?" Aaron asked. "I'm sick and tired of eating on the run and I'm no good as a cook. Think you can do some cooking like this when you get to San Francisco?"
"You're in luck. I love to cook. Guess I'm just a frustrated chef and cooking just for me is not a lot of fun. Get ready! This is the part of our relationship I think you're really going to like," Jill replied.
"Actually,
there aren't any parts I'm not liking," Aaron said, grinning.
As she sat in the warm morning sunshine looking out at the perfectly maintained golf course, enjoying breakfast with Aaron, the image of the white pill vial containing her supply of Freedom pills flickered briefly through Jill's mind. She quickly shut it out, not wanting anything to destroy this moment. I'll think about it later, she thought. I'm probably going to have to do something about this pill thing, but for now I'm just going to enjoy the ride.
Jill had reserved a tee time for 9:00 a.m. The desert could become brutally hot in the afternoon and she wanted them to finish their round of golf before the heat made it unbearable. Given the fact that neither one of them had played any golf for a long time, they both played fairly well and promised each other they would continue to play regularly when Jill moved to San Francisco.
Aaron had belonged to an exclusive country club with a beautiful golf course for several years, but he'd never taken the time to play there. When he’d used the clubhouse for luncheon meetings, he'd often admired the course. It would be fun to take Jill there and play the course on a regular basis. There were a lot of things in San Francisco he wanted to share with her.
The parking lot in the Italian restaurant where Jill had made dinner reservations was jammed with Bentleys, Mercedes, and BMWs. When she saw the parking lot, she was doubly glad that she'd called for a reservation. She'd read in the local newspaper, the Desert Sun, that you couldn't get a dinner reservation for the weekend after Wednesday. They were always full. The hostess escorted them to a table for two. The place was packed and a quick glance at the food being served to the guests at the other tables reassured Jill that she'd made the right choice in selecting this restaurant.
Good wine, good food, good service, and a great ambiance. The restaurant scored a ten on all fronts. Satisfied and sleepy, they made their way back to Jill's gated community home.
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