by Jerri Hines
* * * *
Katy looked over at her husband of only a few minutes. She gave him a smile. He had done the unthinkable and she was ecstatic. She stood within her family’s drawing room celebrating her marriage. Bruce, God love him, had arranged everything.
Katy sensed that perhaps her father’s appearance had been given only with the greatest reluctance. In truth, her parents weren’t given an option since she was certain Bruce made his position known...their welfare lay now in his hands. But they had been here to see her exchange vows. Bruce had given that to her, knowing how much it meant.
The crowded room was filled with friends and neighbors. The tables were lined with only the best food that could be offered. She felt as a princess dressed in a shimmering cream colored gown. Her hair was upswept in a flattering manner, and her face plastered with a never ending smile. Wine flowed, people laughed and the music had only just begun.
Only Jane wasn’t here. Dear sweet Jane. Her health hadn’t permitted, but she had offered Elm Bluff for the ceremony. Katy would have accepted until Bruce had enticed her family to concede to her family home here in Charles Town.
Granted, her mother’s greeting had been forced and seemed slightly hesitant, but Katy ignored the coolness. In time, she thought, they would be grateful for her actions. She saved them from poverty; her father from prison or worse.
Hadn’t she? In time, they would understand that she did all to make it right.
Her father hadn’t hidden his antipathy toward her Bruce very well, but had whispered to Katy after the ceremony that he had a special message for her.
“Meet me in the foyer in ten minutes. I want you to have a memorable day, my child.”
Excitedly, Katy made her way through the guests. She wanted only for her father to take her in his arms and tell her he forgave her. That he loved her and wanted her only to be happy. Entering the foyer, she didn’t see him. Her eyes swept all around, but then Katy looked up on the staircase.
His eyes stared at her, a hollow, blank emotionless stare as if he were seeing right through her. But it wasn’t the look that scared her. In his right hand, he held a pistol.
“Father!” Katy screamed.
He laughed a cold, impassive laugh. “Ah, my daughter! Blood of my blood. I wanted only for you to see what you have driven me to. Betrayed by my own!”
“Father, don’t talk like that!” Katy cried. “I love you. I would never betray you....”
The foyer filled with guests. From behind Katy, she could feel an arm go protectively around her. Her mother rushed toward the stairs, crying up to her husband. Katy heard Randa call out, “Don’t, Father!”
But all was in vain. He placed the pistol in his mouth and fired. Katy froze. Her eyes never left her father as he fell over the banister, splattering onto the marble floor in front of her. He lay at her feet, his face distorted and bloody. She screamed.
Chapter 24
On a crisp winter’s afternoon, Jane stepped off the Fairweather. Shivering, she pulled her cloak tighter about her. Her hand lay upon her stomach. The babe moved, but her mind lay upon Caleb. Where had he escaped to now?
The voyage had been difficult, not because of her health which had greatly improved, but between the constant worry that Caleb would jump over the railing and Katy’s disposition. Jane glanced around. She didn’t know where Katy had gone to either.
Colonel Leckie asked Jane to keep an eye upon Katy as best she could. Worry lived in his eyes. Jane had concluded with good reason. Not that Jane had known her well, but Katy’s manner had altered from the carefree girl she had first met to one who had the look of carrying the weight of the world.
“I wish I could go with her. She won’t admit how much this is upsetting her. Then with Randa at the funeral going at her like she did!” Colonel Leckie’s heart achingly relayed. “Blaming Katy for everything. Peyton’s death, her hardship, the loss of their fortune. Their father! How I wish I had never tried—”
“You were motivated by your heart. It will take time for her heart to heal,” Jane said. “She will feel better away from everything that reminds her of her father’s death.”
Jane assured the Colonel that it had been the right decision to remove Katy from Charles Town. But Jane had begun to see she was wrong...ever so wrong.
At first, Katy had been polite, if reserved on board the ship. That was until Jane attended the first Captain’s dinner. Jane had been confined to her bed for the first part of the journey. She learned quickly she wasn’t much of a sailor and didn’t come out of her cabin until her queasiness had eased.
The dinner passed pleasantly enough. It was Katy’s behavior that had become worrisome. Katy was engaged in an intimate conversation with one of General Durham’s men, a Captain Thomas Elliott. Her eyes danced as she sat in conversation with the man, who seemed intent upon her as well.
Worried about Caleb and Katy, Jane didn’t hear footsteps behind her.
“I’m afraid we have arrived a few days earlier than was thought and there is a storm brewing. It doesn’t leave a good first impression of my country.”
Startled, Jane glanced over her shoulder. General Durham stood beside her.
“I will see to reserving accommodations at an inn I know is respectable.”
“Thank you,” Jane said coolly. Her head hurt. Of all the people to have to rely upon in the world! Oh, Sumner, what have you done to me?
She had remained aloof toward the General during the voyage. Her forgiving nature couldn’t overcome his presence. Jane sighed. “I hate to ask, General, but I seem to have lost everyone that I have traveled with...Caleb, Anna...Katy.”
“I took the liberty of entertaining the young man. I had a few of my men walk him over to one of his Majesty’s vessels I saw upon our arrival. It is my hope we don’t hear a cannon firing in a moment,” he said in an attempt at slight humor. “But I’m certain he will be well looked after. Your nanny is seeing to your trunks,” he said simply. “Come. I instructed every one of my intentions.”
“I’m certain I can—”
“And I’m as certain you would try, but it will be much simpler if you allow me to do so. I have sent a note off to your sister-in-law at her husband’s estate in Cornwall. It is relatively close if she is there. If she is at her father-in-law’s it will take longer. I don’t suspect she is expecting your arrival since I included your husband’s letters with my note.”
“I don’t want to press upon you, General. I appreciate your attention, but you have family of your own and I’m sure you are anxious to go to them. If the inn is acceptable, I’m certain I can manage—”
“Again, Mrs. Meador,” General Durham cut into her train of thought, “please let me—”
Jane frowned. “General, can’t you understand?” she asked bluntly. The entire of the voyage she had given him a semblance of politeness, but her nerves were on edge. “Sumner told me that you had your reasons for your actions. He seems to believe you are a man of your word...one to hold to honor. But I’m afraid I can’t get over the incident as easily.”
“I have tried to apologize, repeatedly I believe. I don’t expect your forgiveness, but please let me see that you are safely at your destination.”
Jane turned her gaze from him. She asked lightly, “Have you seen Katy?”
He hesitated. “Why don’t I take you over in the carriage now to—”
His arm went to her elbow, but she jerked it back.
“No,” she said emphatically. “Do you know where she is? I promised Colonel Leckie....” She paused when she saw the expression on his face.
“Tell me where she is,” Jane demanded. She didn’t need to ask with whom.
“I believe she has already departed the ship. She informed me she has decided to go to her brother-in-law’s,” he said, reaching into his pocket. “I assume she will see you at the inn. She asked me to deliver this note to you. She hopes—”
“I have to retrieve her,” Jane said under her breath. She turned hurriedly, too
hurriedly. The deck, slick from the wet and cold, caused her to slip. General Durham caught her.
“God damn it, Hannah! Can you not think and take care of yourself,” he uttered, displaying a bad temper that had built with frustration. Quickly, his manner altered. “Again, I have to apologize. I have to plead that I feel responsible for your delicate condition and only want you to take care of your health.”
Jane’s hands rested upon his arms. She stared at him. Who had he called her? Hannah. Who was that? Did it matter? She eased his hands off of her and backed away.
“I will go to this inn that you have taken the time to arrange for me. I suppose I have run Katy off with my constant....” She paused. She was rambling on.
Jane reprimanded herself greatly. She had been upon Katy on every turn, reminding her of how Colonel Leckie loved her, wanted only for her to be safe, how much Jane was indebted to her always for her actions. Her eyes welled up. She had driven Katy off with her good intentions.
“I wouldn’t take blame, Jane.” He called her by her given name which took her by surprise. “We all have to deal with our own actions and their consequences in our own manner. You have been a good friend to her and have not let Colonel Leckie down. He wanted her within England as your husband wanted you safe. He didn’t care if she was with your sister-in-law or his family. She has chosen her husband’s family.”
“I wanted only—”
“For everyone to have the marriage you have. One in which you share a love. Don’t blush. You proclaimed it beautifully in court. It is seen within you. I can only speak for myself that I find myself envying Sumner to be able to have what he loves so dearly.” He stopped. He looked down for a moment and then back at her with a small smile. “Come. You will catch a cold if I don’t get you within the warmth soon.”
Jane relented and accepted his arm, more because she didn’t want to slip again. She was tired and wanted nothing more than to regain her legs. Then, she had to worry about Caleb.
* * * *
Watching from her window, Jane noted the weather had thankfully turned to rain. It was not often that Jane had seen snow.
She sat back. Where had Caleb gone to now? Poor Anna had tried her best to keep him underfoot. She had done an excellent job of looking after the young man. At least now they had docked, there was no more worry about him falling overboard.
Her heart warmed upon the deliverance of a note from Mount Glynn. Cathryn was at the estate with her entire family. Moreover, she sounded overjoyed that Jane had arrived.
Dearest Sister,
I hope you don’t mind I call you such for that is what I feel you are. I am so happy! As soon as the weather breaks, I will be upon you to bring you into my home, which I want more than anything for you to feel is yours also. My eyes teared upon the news of your marriage. And you have brought Caleb! I haven’t seen him since he was an infant. His cousins are anxious to see him. Welcome, Jane Meador, wife of my dearest brother. I will see you soon. Your loving sister,
Lady Cathryn Pennington
The drawing room had been quiet. There were few travelers because of the weather, but General Durham hadn’t left her. She was grateful, but she would never have admitted the truth to him. Katy had departed long before the snow began.
Jane had tried to talk her into coming with her. It had done no good.
“My dear Jane, you will be so engrossed with the baby and your family. You don’t need me to be there. I need to do this. Please,” Katy said. Her mind already made up. “Believe me. I will be fine. Trust me. I will come and visit. I promise. I can’t wait until the time you get to hold your baby. More than anything, I want that. That will make me happy.”
“I want—” Jane began.
“I know,” Katy said simply. She leaned over and hugged her. “I will visit. I promise.”
Katy left Jane sitting where she sat now upon the sofa. She couldn’t hear Caleb. That was never a good sign, but then down the corridor, she heard little feet pounding.
He peered into the room and rushed inside. He hugged her tightly and kissed her cheek. The force pushed her back slightly, but she laughed.
“Ssh, Mother,” he said. In an attempt, Jane supposed, to be quiet. “I’m hiding. Don’t let anyone know of my hiding place.”
He glanced around the room for a spot to hide, but as he did so, General Durham eased into the doorway. The General placed his finger over his lips, but Caleb followed Jane’s eyes. He screamed with delight.
“I have to go, Mother,” he uttered, scooting off the sofa. “I can’t get caught.”
His little legs ran out the side door. A laugh escaped Jane. She hadn’t expected such activity from the General, who slumped down into the seat by the fire. He breathed out deeply.
“I will take only a few minutes to rest,” he said. “He is relentless.”
“You have been good with him. Thank you,” she said sincerely. “I don’t know what I would have done.”
“I have told you there is no need,” the General said, straightening his posture. “I have enjoyed him. I have a son. Unfortunately, I have been away for much of his childhood.”
“Then it’s important you go and see him,” Jane said. “I’m certain he looks upon you as Caleb looks upon his father.”
He chuckled. “I do look forward to seeing both. I have a daughter also.”
“And your wife,” Jane added. She regretted it the moment she uttered the words. She meant nothing other than being polite, but the look on his face altered slightly.
“Of course, my wife,” he said and nodded. His hands hit upon the arms of the chair. “I am confident that your family will be here promptly. The weather has broken. I need to prepare myself as you have suggested.”
He stood. Jane hesitated for a moment. She had thought about it much since he had uttered the name. Why, she didn’t know, but she needed to ask.
“Did you hate her so much? Is that why you treated me so?”
The General turned slowly. His eyes darkened. His reserve reemerged. “I don’t understand what you are asking.”
“You called me Hannah upon the deck. I have contemplated it since for it struck me as odd,” she stated simply. “Do I remind you of this person? Is that why you treated me in the manner you did?”
“I have tried to explain my actions. Your husband—”
Jane shook her head. “It is no answer, General. I felt your abhorrence toward me almost the moment we met. No matter your words of denial,” her intention couldn’t be diverted, “I want only to understand. Did she leave you? Or did she die upon you? You seem to be the sort to expect your wishes to come before all, even death.”
“You don’t know what you are talking about. Now, if you will excuse me.”
“I suppose I didn’t expect an answer. I wanted only a reason to help me understand,” she retorted. “But one thing, did it help? To strike out at me in the manner you did. Did it help ease your pain?”
Curtly, he said, “You don’t know anything—”
“No,” she retorted. “But I know about pain. I know what it is like to lose someone you love. I know how hard the pain is within you in trying to accept a situation in which you don’t have control. My world collapsed around me; if not for Sumner, I don’t know what I would have done.”
Jane continued to study him thoughtfully. The gaze prodded the General to defend himself. “I don’t question what you endured, Mrs. Meador,” he said, returning to her formal name. “But in some circumstances, you have no knowledge. Your moral fiber can’t comprehend beyond love and marriage. That one follows the other.” He paused for a moment. His eyes lay intent on hers. He uttered, “Neither could she.”
“I’m sorry, General.”
“Sorry?” He gripped tight the back of the chair he had sat in. His eyes became distant as reliving a moment in the past. “Rules, morals, all worked against me. I fought them for the one thing I wanted more than life itself. The one thing I will never have. You ask me if I was angry?
” He turned back to her. “I still am.”
“What of her?” Jane’s voice carried low, smoothly throughout the room. “Did you look upon her interest first above your own? Is that why you hold within you the frustration that you could have changed all?”
His eyes lingered on her. “I don’t understand of what you are saying.”
“That if you walked away from her so that she could have the life she wanted, you must love her greatly. It shouldn’t be anger that you hold within you, sadness perhaps that it ended in a way you didn’t want.”
“I didn’t walk away. The situation demanded I do so.” Durham shook his head. “You don’t understand. I will never be able to see my...”
“Child?”
Resolve overcame him. He slowly walked over to the window. “Only a few know,” he said solemnly. “He would be of the age of your Caleb. I have only seen him on one occasion.”
“Is he well looked after?”
General Durham smiled. “He is much as Caleb. A fire lives within him. A handsome, bright lad. Yes, he is looked after well. But it isn’t in the manner he should be brought up. He adores the man he believes is his father. It is as a sword in my side.”
Comprehension drew within her. “I believe now I can see more what you feel. No wonder you suffer, but,” Jane hesitated momentarily before she continued, “if she is like me and in a situation I am only interjecting could have occurred, it would be my guess she did all for the child.”
Jane’s hand instinctively went to her stomach. “The love of a child. Could it be you are angry at her, because she did what was best for your child?”
His eyes stared out the window. He hadn’t the chance to respond. A couple of carriages drew up at the inn’s entrance. A commotion arose as children emerged, giggling and laughing loudly. A moment later, Caleb’s head emerged within the room for his ears had perked up.
General Durham said simply, “I believe your family has arrived.”
Chapter 25
Time relentlessly passed as it had since Jane had arrived in Plymouth, England on a wintry January day. She wondered later if her husband was doing battle at the same time. Communication was slow at best. His letter had taken more than four months to arrive.