Graduation was nothing like I had expected. A few months before I would have pictured myself celebrating with Hunter, the both of us congratulating each other with a kiss as we exited the ceremony. It was nothing like that. Hunter sat in his section, talking to some of his old friends, and treating me like a complete stranger. I hadn’t attempted to speak to him in the weeks since our break up and we did a good job of avoiding each other all together.
The void he left felt like I had lost a limb, not just because of our relationship, but because he had been my constant since childhood, and that had been reduced to nothing. Monique had been a huge source of moral support doing everything in her power to keep my mind on positive things. All I could do was look forward to leaving Phoenix, my bad school memories, and Hunter behind as I embarked on what was next.
❁ ❁ ❁
My mom and I had had a long journey to the city and we set up temporary camp at Aunt Haley’s apartment as we got my dorm room situated. Brittany Hall wasn’t far from her loft and it made it easy for us to travel back and forth. My suite mate was named Cecilia and she was from Columbus Ohio and had only been to NYU for her interview. Her mom was relieved to know I had family in town and my mom promised Haley and I would look after her.
We had lucked into one of the only double suites in the building. Most of the others were quads and the rooms were much smaller than the two we shared. Cecilia and her mother looked like twins, both sharing the same long dark hair, olive skin, and big brown eyes framed in long lashes. The only immediately noticeable difference was her mother’s Portuguese accent.
The end of move-in weekend had finally come and we both said tearful goodbyes to our moms. My mom had to dash out of the building and into a cab because she hated for me to see her cry. I didn’t quite know what to do with myself once she was gone. It felt so completely final and for the first time I was afraid. I had felt a lot of things leading up to my move, but for some reason fear hadn’t been one of them. I had probably been too focused on getting as far away from Phoenix and the memory of Hunter, but now here I was, in my college dorm with Cecilia and from the look on her face she was feeling the same.
“Hey, there’s no rule that says we have to stay in. Want to go out and get some ice cream or something?” I asked, feeling uneasy and antsy with my new found freedom. Cecilia took a deep breath and got up from the little couch in our suite.
“Yes. Let’s do that,” she said with a nod.
It was still warm outside and summer was doing its best to hold on but you could feel fall making its way into the atmosphere. There was a slight chill in the air as we walked home eating ice cream from waffle cones. We were exchanging stories of the most awkward things to happen to us in high school (including my past as Fugly) and laughing so hard that my eyes started to water. It was the first time I had felt almost care free in a long time.
“What about a boyfriend? Did you leave one of those behind?” Cecilia asked between bites. We had found a bench and sat down as we looked at the skyline.
“Oh, that’s a complicated one. He left me. Long and depressing story. What about you?”
“No, um...I’m actually into girls,” she said apprehensively.
“Okay, did you leave a girlfriend behind?” I took another bite and saw Cecilia grin and relax.
“No. I dated a girl from another school for a while. Super casual. I was almost hoping leaving would help me figure out if I miss her,” she said with a shrug. “Too soon to tell.”
“No, actually, I think you’d know. When I even entertained the idea of coming here and leaving Hunter my heart would break a little. It’s not a good sign if you don’t already miss her.”
“Damn. You’re probably right,” she said with a light hearted laugh. We got up and took our time as we strolled back to Brittany Hall. The changes for the better were starting and I silently hoped they would continue. She was in the middle of telling me a story about accidentally taking a candy bar from the gas station when she was in first grade and we were debating on if it counted as shoplifting. “I took it. I didn’t pay for it. Technically, I say shoplifting.”
“Geez, you almost sound proud, but let me ask you this- did you fully understand how money worked in first grade?”
“Of course not. I hate math,” she said with a laugh as she grabbed the handle to open the door to our building. But I couldn’t move. I was completely frozen in place by what I saw behind her. “Hey, what’s wrong Fen?” she asked as her laughter died down. And at the sound of my name he looked up.
“This could only happen to me,” I thought silently. Tru looked just as shocked at the sight of me as I did seeing him and the girl holding his hand didn’t look shocked. She looked pissed.
Thank you for reading Fugly! Follow me @taliehawkins on Instagram!
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, companies, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
© 2019 Talie D. Hawkins. All rights reserved.
Fugly: Book One of the Fenley East Series Page 23